For those of you that have this oneshot on alert, I'm not sure why seeing as it's a oneshot, The Akatsuki Is Screwed's sequel, Konoha and Oto Are Screwed, is now up.

The Sequel Includes (Or Will At Some Point):

The torture of Konoha citizens and Shinobi at the hands of Obito on behalf of 'Sensei's little Naru-chan'

The reading of Kakashi's diary by Naruto and Obito looking for blackmail material (and an explanition as to how Kakashi doesn't actually read Icha Icha).

The retrieval of an unwilling Sasuke by Iruka so he'd stop being a bad big brother to Naruto (an idea put in his head by the people at the ramen stand)

The (possible torture and) death of Orochimaru because of faulty rumors that Iruka happened to hear

The torture of Oto citizens and Shinobi at the hands of Iruka until they point him in the direction of Oro-baka


The copying of many jutsu (the resurection jutsu included) from Oro-baka's personal library by Iruka for Naruto because he likes learning new things


Kakashi's eyes widened in horror as he took in the sight before him. It was far too terrible to be possible and yet there it, or rather they, were.

Uchiha Obito and Uzumaki Naruto had met.


'Sasuke in Oto equals depressed Naruto. Depressed Naruto equals Iruka failing as big brother. Sasuke back in Konoha equals happy Naruto. Happy Naruto equals Iruka being good big brother.'

Iruka stood up suddenly, making both Teuchi and Ayame jump.

"Iruka-kun?" Ayame asked.

"I'm going to get Sasuke!" Iruka yelled, as he took off.


"Then why does he giggle like a pervert when he reads that book?" Naruto asked him.

"I never said it wasn't porn. I just said it wasn't Icha Icha. That book is his diary, surrounded by an Icha Icha cover."

"His diary?" Naruto deadpanned, "Why would his diary have porn in it?"


Sometime, before it got to Iruka's ears, several words had been 'misplaced' and it became the rumor Iruka heard: 'Orochimaru wanted to kill some blonde haired, whiskered faced boy'.

Iruka only knew of one blonde haired, whiskered faced boy – Naruto. Orochimaru was so going down.