Note: This takes place just about where Twilight begins, when Bella is going to school in Forks for the first time.
Disclaimer: Lawyers are evil and bad, and I'm obligated to say "I do not own Twilight or any of the characters in it" so I never have to meet a pyscho lawyer trying to sue me.
Enjoy the story...
Everyone just thought I was a jumpy kid, kind of nervous and way too shy. They assumed that I had always been like that, it was just my personality. They never considered that there was a reason I was scared to be around too many people, particularly males. They didn't think there was anything amiss, and maybe they didn't even look for it. Because I wasn't the kind of person to turn "bad" or emo when something went wrong. I was the kind of person to slowly become insubstantial, to sink into the ground. So there's a girl who's kind of way too quiet, big deal.
I stared out the window of my old room in Forks, in my father Charlie's house. I had arrived earlier that day; Charlie had picked me up at the airport and shown me the car he bought me. He wanted me to be happy, wanted me to forget how my mother died. But he didn't even know half the story.
My mother's husband, my step-father, Phil, had seemed like a nice guy. But after the third time he had screamed at me and even hit me; I lost all of my optimistic ideals that he really was a nice person. My mom never stopped believing he was okay though, even when he called her horrible things, even when he beat her.
I stayed away from the house most of the time. I didn't really have anywhere safe to go to; I didn't have any friends, so I went to the library. Some kids thought I was a weird bookworm, which was easier to accept than the fact I was hiding in a library.
I actually did grow to love books, though. When I was reading them, I could pretend that my private little hell some people might call my life didn't exist. It wasn't too bad, overall. At least I was away from Phil.
I sighed and walked to the bathroom. Today was my first day at Forks High School. Yippee. I knew that it would likely be the same as my other school, and I would avoid everyone as much as possible.
I grimaced at my reflection in the mirror. I was beautiful, I knew that. I also hated it. Because that was part of what started causing trouble for me in the first place.
When I was a freshman, all of the boys noticed I was pretty, and most of them being the shallow perverts they were, asked me out. That was before mom had married Phil, before I had learned to be cautious, not to trust people. That was only three years ago. So much could change in three years.
I went out with a guy named Steven. He really did seem genuinely nice. That was before I learned that seeming and being are two very different things.
He took me out on a date. My mom was so happy for me, half the school envied me because Steven was just downright hot. They didn't know the truth about him. And I never told anyone.
The date seemed fine. Before Steven pulled me into an alley outside the movie theatre and raped me.
I never told anyone, not even my mom Renee. I felt dirty, ashamed. And I was scared. Scared of smiling guys who seemed nice. Scared of people in general. Phil coming along only made this worse. And then there was my mother's death.
She had been shopping at the store, and hadn't come back. Police had found her body a few days later. They told me she had been robbed and then beaten to death. And I was even more scared. Now I was scared of the world. I was a messed up person.
The only good thing that came out of my mother's death was getting away from Phil. I didn't like Forks that much, me and rain do not mix, but I would be away from Phil. Away from painful memories and the hustle and bustle of city life. I told myself that in this small town, maybe I could be safe. Maybe.
I turned from the reflection I hated and walked downstairs. Charlie's cruiser was gone, but he had left me a note lying on the kitchen table.
Left for work, make sure to have breakfast.
Be home at six.
I sighed, stuffing the note into my pocket. I knew I wouldn't have fun, and I didn't really feel like eating. Pulling out a cereal bowl, I placed it in the sink, filling it partially with water. There, I faked my own breakfast.
I knew I should eat, I knew that I was almost too thin, and that boys found my slimness even more attractive. But I hadn't had much of an appetite since Renee's death.
I walked out to my red truck, careful not to trip, and the engine started with a loud roar. I found the school easily, and parked my car. No one was here yet, perfect. I didn't feel safe walking through crowds of strangers.
I took a deep breath, mentally bracing myself.
You can do this. Don't be scared. This could be better than Phoenix. You can do this.
I hopped out of the car, heading into a building that looked like the main office. It was warm inside, and I timidly walked up to the lady with wildly frizzy hair sitting behind the desk.
"Um, I'm Isabella Swan," I told her uncertainly.
"Oh, of course dear, we've been expecting you," she replied smiling. She looked surprised at me, maybe it was because I was just new, or maybe it was because I was beautiful. Either way, I hated her for staring at me, and I once again silently cursed my appearance.
She then introduced herself as Ms. Cope, handing me my schedule and kindly smiling at me, telling me to have a good day. I waited silently, and forced a smile before I left. I honestly don't think I've had a good day for years.
It wasn't quite as bad as it could have been. A lot of people were staring at me, which made me feel intensely uncomfortable and kind of scared, but they acted fairly nice. I mostly tried to keep my distance, especially from the males, but one boy named Mike kept trailing me like a puppy or an obsessive stalker.
I was on edge, uncertain, and shy. But overall, it hadn't been a bad day so far. Until after lunch.
I was sitting in the cafeteria, near a group of people that included Mike, a girl named Jessica, and a girl almost as shy and quiet as me named Angela. I wasn't talking, and I sensed that my silence was already making some of the people nervous, but I couldn't seem to bring myself to talk. I was anxious, with all the people surrounding me. I just needed to be alone.
I didn't notice them at lunch. I was too preoccupied with convincing myself everything was alright. But I would notice soon enough.
I walked to biology vaguely listening to Mike talking about something or another. When I arrived at the classroom, most of the people were already sitting down, and only one seat was open. The one next to him.
He was unbelievably gorgeous, with untidy bronze hair and perfect skin even paler than my own. I silently cursed, realizing I couldn't have the good fortune of sitting next to girls in all of my classes.
I slowly made my way to the seat, careful not to trip, and sat down. Suddenly, the boy stiffened and turned to glare at me with intense onyx eyes. I exhaled sharply, scared out of my wits. I quickly dropped my gaze and quietly scooted as far away from him as I could. He did the same, his body rigid and his fists clenched. I had to hold onto the edge of the desk to keep my hands from visibly trembling.
Breathe, breathe. It's okay. Calm down…
He stayed like that the rest of class. It was the longest period I have ever had in my life. Finally it was over, and he jumped up, smoothly exiting the room before I was even out of my seat.
I quickly got up and began to walk towards gym, half scared out of my wits.
I didn't notice Mike had caught up to me until I heard his voice and jumped in panic. "Hey, what did you do to Edward Cullen? He looked like he wanted to murder you." I shrugged slightly, still struggling to regain my composure. "Hey, are you all right Bella?" Mike asked, eyeing me strangely.
"Oh, yeah. I'm fine," I lied quickly, walking towards gym.
Gym passed fairly quickly, mostly because of the fact that I didn't have to change out, and I quickly exited, intent on getting back to the safety of being home and alone.
There were way too many people, all swarming around me, staring at me. I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown right in front of everyone. I kept my head down, walking more quickly, telling myself to calm down.
I didn't notice them walking in my same general direction until they began to pass me.
They were all just as gorgeous as Edward, all just as frigidly beautiful. As I walked past, the enormous one with dark hair quickly put a restraining hand on Edward's shoulder, as if warning him not to attack. Edward glared at me, and looked like he was fighting against the boy holding him. The tall blonde boy was staring at me extremely oddly, his forehead wrinkled in concentration as he looked at me.
I was scared. Three beautiful, prefect boys standing in front of me. All of them staring at me, their expressions ranging from hate to confusion. I practically started hyperventilating; my muscles seemed to seize up.
They won't attack you herer in the middle of a crowd. Calm down, it's okay.
I practically ran to my car, and almost broke down crying in relief.
Day one. And already one boy thinks there's something wrong with you, and one boy hates your guts and wants to murder you. Perfect.
I knew that tomorrow was going to be a very long day.
Okay, so please tell me what you think. I swore to myself when I wrote my first fanfiction story that reviews did not matter to me; but of course that lofty attitude lasted until I got my third review and decided I was just as obsessed with knowing what people were thinking about my writing as any other person. (Sighs sadly thinking "If only I was perfect") Anyways, I really appreciate it when people review, but seeing as you will probably reading this really long Author's Note forever you'll never get the chance...