Disclaimer: Anything recognized belongs to Stephenie Meyer.
Note: In this fanfic, Edward can tune out to people if he wants, but he doesn't have much control over it.
I was curled up in a ball in a room with one door and no windows. I knew that I wasn't going to use that door anytime soon. I was in too much pain.
It had been months since I left Bella – no, I couldn't think about her. Thinking about her just made the pain worse. Of course, a new wave washed over me and I wished I could die. Living without Bella wasn't a life. And she was probably living happily with someone else: Mike, or Tyler, or Eric, or that person she mentioned to me when she first told me that she knew about us, Jacob...
I tensed as fresh waves of pain washed over me, and I let the memories have me. Good memories mostly, but unfortunately the main one was the one where I had left her in the forest. I remember the look in her eyes so clearly...I knew that she believed me wholeheartedly. How could she? How could she possibly believe me after all of the times I'd told her I loved her?
And then I was shaking with sobs again, dry, tearless sobs. I hadn't 'cried' in a while because I was too numb. But back then I was still fighting the memories. As I looked back on all of the time that I had spent with Bella, I realized that I couldn't blame her for what had happened. I was the monster. I had left her. She could never leave me – she had told me that over and over again.
But she is with someone else now, I reminded myself. And the hole in my chest that had been there for some time opened even wider. The pain was excruciating.
I want to die...Bella definitely doesn't love me after what I did. But I still love her. So much...
Suddenly, the door burst open. Needless to say, I was shocked. Who had come here and why were they here?
Jasper stood in the doorway, his face grim. He ran over to me and pulled me into a sitting position. "Something's happened. I'm not sure what it is, but it's happened." he said. "Over the last month or so, have you felt your mind-reading ability weaken?"
"No," I said shortly. My voice was ragged from pain. "I haven't read minds much lately, in case you haven't noticed."
Jasper completely ignored my tone. "Well, a while ago, Alice stopped seeing the future as well as she could. And I couldn't control people's emotions anymore. We were all a little scared because we didn't know what was happening; Alice hadn't seen it. And suddenly, yesterday, Alice was able to see the future without any doubts or mistakes. And I can sense people's emotions from across the globe." I looked at him and noticed that he was completely serious. "We were wondering if it was the same for you. Can you try it?"
I shook my head, no. I hadn't focused on my mind for months. I wasn't going to do it more than I could help now. The memories came to me without me being able to do anything, but at least I could control what I heard. Sort of.
"Well then," Jasper could see that I wasn't going to be persuaded. "I'll tell you the other news. I can sense a strong – "
He stopped suddenly and sniffed the air. He hissed one word, but it made me tense. "Victoria," he breathed.
And he was off.