Rated: K+

Summary: Reminiscing on the friendship between Mukahi and Oshitari… but something terrible happens. Dirty Pair-centric(The title is kinda self-explanatory) Also, the prank of Mukahi and Oshitari is revealed!

Pairings: onesided dirty

Category: general

Characters: Mukahi and Oshitari mainly, other Hyoutei characters get a couple of lines

Disclaimer: Konomi Takeshi owns PoT

Note: Flashbacks are not going to be italics because they're such a pain on the eyes and don't expect me to keep consistent with the Kansai dialect cuz I can get really lazy.

Direct sequel to Advice from Jirou, another one of dirty pair drama:

Hyotei Phobia

Hyotei Library Session

Bets and Lovers

Book of Stupidity

Fights and Idiots

Switching Places

Book of Stupidity 2

Melting Ice

Lost in Tennis

Of Cameras and Attention

Street Tennis

Oresama's Journal

Advice from Jirou

The Park and the Church

Freshman Year:

The first time Mukahi and Oshitari met was on the opposite sides of a court, the first words they exchanged was something along the lines of "You're going down NINJA!" and "You will have to do better than that." (I'll let you guess who said which) Cool brown eyes gazed into fierce blue ones as they starred each other down.

Their match was in a secluded court of the school with nobody speculating, mainly because Atobe had challenged the current buchou of Hyoutei and many people wanted to watch the 'prodigious' freshman play with the buchou. (The buchou won 7-6 by the way.)

It was a match that lasted for an hour, until Mukahi ran out of stamina at tie break.


"You're pretty hard to read yourself, with all that jumping." Oshitari said, "But you'll have to do better than that."



"Where're u going?"

"You told me to leave."

"Oh…" Mukahi seemed to consider for a moment, "then leave already!"



"What is it?" Mukahi turned around before entering the Mercedes waiting for him outside the school. "Oh it's you."

"You forgot your watch in the showers." Oshitari explained, "It's St. Moritz, so I thought you'd want it back."

"Um, thanks." Mukahi turned to enter the Mercedes but stopped again. "Hey."


"We should have a rematch one day."

"Yeah, I'd like that."


"Hey! It's you again!" Mukahi pointed an accusing finger at his fellow freshman in a Tennis store.

"I have a name, it's Oshitari Yuushi."

"Ninja name!" Mukahi cheerfully said.

"What are you doing here anyways?"

"Just getting some grip tape," Oshitari shrugged, "Usually get them specially shipped from Germany but it seems there was something wrong with the shipment. What are you doing here?"

"Just browsing around," Mukahi shrugged, "bored."

"Interesting," Oshitari got his grip tape and went in line to pay.

"Hey, I use that type too!" Mukahi said, looking at the little package of grip tape Oshitari was holding. "If I don't have anything else better to use."

"What a coincidence…" Oshitari said indifferently, "It's pretty cheap." It was the most expensive grip tape in the store.

"Where're you going now?" Mukahi asked.


"Do you ever go out?"

"Not without a girl."

"Ohhh, I see…" Mukahi pouted slightly at the prospect of fun ruined.

"But…" Oshitari paused, a mischievous smirk on his face. "Yourself looks enough like a girl to fit the criteria."

"…" Mukahi blushed, wondering if it was a compliment or an insult.

"Come, I'll treat you to ice-cream…"



"Ne look Aoki-kun, there's some elementary school boys here." A fierce-looking senior pointed his racket at Oshitari and Mukahi.

"What are you babies doing here?"

"…" Mukahi looked at Oshitari with a lazy expression.

"Really didn't want to ruin this new shirt…"

"Meh…" Mukahi took out his racket, "You're all the talk, but can you back it up?"

"Why you brats…"

"Let's go right now, I'll teach you kids a lesson."

"Save it for after the game."

"Mukahi-kun…" Oshitari said.


"This is a doubles court…"


"I've never played doubles before."

"Well now's a good time to start!" Mukahi pulled Oshitari off the bench and onto the court.

After about fifteen minutes, the match was finished with 6-0, the seniors were out of breath, lying on the courts.

"Hey, you're not so bad at doubles, for a newbie."

Oshitari shrugged, "I just hit the ball by instinct."

"Anyways, that was so much fun, we should play doubles more often."

"It's less lonely than playing singles,"-Oshitari smirked- "And much more amusing. You know what, let's be doubles partners from now on."

"That'll be cool!" Mukahi grinned, "you can teach me that Higuma Otoshi!"


"Why not?"



"You know what?" Oshitari stopped and turned to Mukahi.


"You're cute when your mad."

"Shut up." Mukahi's face turned a shade of red similar to his hair.

Junior Year:

"Tari-chan!" Mukahi jumped up and tackled Oshitari to the ground as Oshitari was trying to climb into his Porsche.

"Stop calling me that, Muka-kun."

"Okay then, Yuu-chan!"


"Anyways guess what?"


"You're supposed to guess!"

"Yano-sense gave you detention for throwing rocks at her again?"

"NO! We're on the team!"

"The regulars team?"



"What do you mean okay? Isn't it great?"

"Sure." Oshitari pushed his glasses up, "personally, I'd rather get on the team before Atobe."

"Pshh, who could." Mukahi rolled off Oshitari. "He's already fukubuchou."

"Technically speaking, he's already the buchou, since our actual buchou doesn't do anything."

"Anyways, We're now going to be the doubles two pairing!"

"That's cool."


"Tari-chan!" Mukahi ran into Oshitari after practise.

"What?" Oshitari finally gave up on trying to correct Mukahi.

"I'm bored!"

"Well, do something interesting."

"Like what?"

"Don't know, cross-dress or something."


Oshitari turned to Mukahi with an evil smirk, the kind the cat gives the rat trapped in the corner. Mukahi wished he didn't say anything, but it was too late to turn back now.

Mukahi gulped, "Uh-oh."

It wasn't very surprising that the next day, Mukahi went to school in a miniskirt, that day, Mukahi learned an important lesson.


"Hey, I was thinking…" Mukahi bounced to Oshitari after a 6-0 doubles two match.

"Congratulations." Oshitari was packing away his racket.

"Shut up, Tari-chan!"


"Hey, did you know we're famous now? For being pranksters? The senseis all hate us."

"I would've never guessed." Oshitari replied sardonically.

Mukahi ignored the sarcasm and continued, "Anyways, we should do something to celebrate our first match."

"Something huh…" Oshitari smirked his infamous smirk again.

"I know that look, you're thinking of something good!" Mukahi grinned.

"You know me too well." Oshitari took his tennis bag and walked away mysteriously.


"Is it ready?" Mukahi asked Oshitari animatedly.

"What is?" Shishido asked, entering the grand cafeteria of Hyoutei. (a.k.a. the dining hall)

"Nothing," Mukahi said hastily.

"Whatever." Shishido turned away.

"Muka-kun!" A bouncing Jirou suddenly entered the cafeteria.

Mukahi turned around and brightened up, "Did you bring it?"

"Uh-huh!" Jirou grinned, "I got lots!" Jirou took Mukahi's arm and dragged him to a window. Outside, in front of the front gate of Hyoutei was a large truck filled with laundry detergent. The person standing in front of the truck waved at Jirou and Jirou merrily waved back.

"Wow, that's a lot."

"Daddy said he didn't care, anyways, what do you need it for?"

"It's only a small part of something big." Mukahi grinned at Oshitari, "Let's go down there!" He dragged Jirou by the wrist down to the truck with Oshitari strolling distantly behind him.

"Hey Yoshioka-san!" Jirou greeted his servant.

"Jirou-bocchama, I hope this is enough." Yoshioka said after bowing.

"Yep, it is!" Jirou turned to Mukahi, "Where do you want to put it?"

"Anywhere's good…"


It was the last day of tennis season and after school that day, there was to be a banquet celebrating it (courtesy of Atobe fukubuchou of course).

"Everything ready?"

"All set." Oshitari was nonchalantly reading the Hyoutei newspaper and humming the Hyoutei anthem, that way, he looked almost innocent. Almost.

"This is going to rock!" Mukahi grinned and sat down beside Oshitari. "When is it going to go off?" He asked anxiously.

Oshitari glanced at his watch, "I set the alarm for the middle of Lit class."

"Woot! We get to miss her rambling on about Mythology and Fairy Tales."

"If all goes well, we'll miss much more than that." Oshitari smirked.


And they did, well kind of. Literature class was a disaster; bubbles kept on popping out of the ventilation system, possibly from the boiler room and the place kept on getting hotter and smelling more like a washing machine than a classroom. Mukahi couldn't help but giggle a little as Oshitari popped a bubble with his pen. Suddenly, an alarm sounded and the whole basement of the building (where the boiler room was) exploded. As expected, they had to evacuate the buildings, and right outside of the building was a huge poster hanging down the side with a picture of the current buchou in bunny-rabbit boxers (photoshopped of course) and of Atobe in his purple boxers (not photoshopped.) The result was nosebleeds and screeches of the fangirls… Oh and the buchou and fukubuchou shooting evil glares at Mukahi and Oshitari.

"This is cool!"

"We just about destroyed a whole half of the school, think Yano-sensei died?"

"We can only hope." Mukahi crossed the fingers, and then added, "The school needed a renovation anyways."

"Hope that kid whose father was president of that famous building company didn't die."

"Meh, who cares."

"MUKAHI AND OSHITARI!" Atobe stormed at them.



Mukahi blinked and Oshitari kept his poker straight face, "What makes you think that it's us?"





"Anyways," Mukahi suddenly raised his voice, "If anyone wants those pictures, we're offering an album at ultra low price!"

"An album…?" Atobe asked.


"Ka…Kabaji…" Atobe's voice was weak. "Call my lawyer." With that he collapsed.



It was in the banquet (which was in a banquet hall and NOT in the destroyed school) when Mukahi found out that he was in love with Oshitari. The banquet was a success (for Mukahi and Oshitari who spiced up the drinks with screwdrivers) and Mukahi and Oshitari even got an award for best (doubles) pairing.

During the whole of the night, Mukahi and Oshitari watched, with semi-sober amusement, Jirou singing the llama song at the top of his voice and their Buchou babbling on and on about his –insert body part- size. Atobe was still not fully recovered from his faint.

Mukahi and Oshitari had made a considerable profit selling underwear pictures of Atobe and were sitting in a corner toasting their success. It was then that Mukahi saw Oshitari's genuine (cough) face and his smirk and realized that Oshitari was gorgeous…

"Cheers to killing Atobe!"

"Cheers to killing the school."



"Wahh, we're going to be separated?" Mukahi asked, outraged after reading the class list for their senior year.

"I guess they wouldn't put us in the same class again after we were labelled as hazardous." Oshitari shrugged.

"That sucks."


"I know!" Mukahi stamped his feet like a spoiled brat.

"Atobe probably paid them to not put us together."


"It doesn't matter since we're still partners."

"In crime?"

"That too."

Back to the Present.

"YUUSHI! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?" Mukahi screamed at Oshitari as they were walking home late at night after their Karaoke session, "WATCH OUT!"

Oshitari didn't hear, he was deep in thought thinking god-knows-what, but it was too late. For when Oshitari looked up, there was a large truck driving straight at him.

"YUUSHI!!!!" That was the last frantic scream Oshitari heard as he was being shoved out of the way and the last thing Oshitari saw was a pool of red matching the hair on the ground as he slipped into blackness.

A/N: Cliffhanger!! Lolz, you're gonna hate me for this I know. I might not update so soon cuz of exams, but then again, I'll get bored of studying and come back. Oh well, I'll fail my culminating task (Worth 10 percent). :'( It took me a while to think of a prank and I got lots of help from Ica! (KeikoHyuuga) So yeah, I hope the whole prank thing wasn't a let down and wasn't lame. Even tho I think it is.

Please Review!! I'll luff you forever if you do!!

Special Shout Out to:

KeikoHyuuga for editing and doing collaborative works with me on anti-ica

Dazed Dreamer for awesome Hiyoshi x Mukahi fics!

Risa-chan for one of my fav Fuji stories (Fuji's Christmas)

Ahgwafor splendid fics! They are so awesome!

Audacities for being… RAL!! Love ya.

Love you guys forever!

If I missed anyone really important, well all my fic readers are important, then please tell me!! I'm forgetful like that (Ica says I fail…) (Ish having fun with italics)