Demonic Love Affair

Dark Lady Devinity

A/n: World's crappiest title. This is a "Zoike," a termed coined by my friend Nicole. So this story is dedicated to her. Anyway, this is a SpikexZoro crossover pairing, with slash. You've been warned.

Demonic Love Affair

It was always bright in Los Angeles, be it night or day. The city lights seemed to be eternally burning, no off switch available. Yet, if one knew where to look, they could find places that were in eternal darkness. Spike just happened to know where to look.

The bleached blond vampire stood on a street corner, his duster allowing him to blend into the midnight blackness. He was in one of the less respectable parts of the city, hunting down four demons that had been opening hell dimensions. As he stood there, Spike saw the familiar pus bags that were the violet-coloured demons he'd been hunting for the past three nights.

Spike slid out from his spot on the corner. In three quick strides he had managed to get behind his targets. Deciding to go with the casual, subtle approach, he quietly tapped one of the demons on the shoulder. The demon turned around and Spike cut its head off with a battle axe he had concealed in his duster.

The demon then exploded.

Spike wiped a foul smelling, greenish coloured substance from his face. He sighed then, noticing that the other demons had made a break for it. Really, it would be easier if they'd just attack him. He'd only kill them more harshly if he had to chase them.

Running after them was the only option, however. He was faster than the demons and stronger too, so he caught up to them with little trouble. One demon was sent flying into a wall.

"C'mon mates," Spike said, "I haven't got the whole night. I'm missing the late night soaps."

The two remaining demons shared a look and seemed to agree on something. One tossed down a weird looking wooden box that came from the folds of his flesh. Then both ran off again. Spike rolled his eyes, thinking, "Never learn, do they?" He moved to join the chase and then noticed the box was glowing in a mystical green light.

The world around him seemed to turn upside down and the vampire passed out.


When he woke up, Spike found himself lying in pure, warm sunlight. He promptly began to scream and flail, throwing his trench coat over his head… he hadn't caught on fire… Spike pulled the coat off and looked around. The bright sunlight didn't even make his skin tingle. Those bloody demons had sent him to a hell dimension.

"Konnichiwa!" a bright, young, boyish voice interrupted the vampire's musings.

Spike looked up and suddenly found himself nose to nose with a ball of pure energy.

"Ever hear of personal space, mate?" the bleach blond asked.

The boy -about seventeen- sat back, smiling largely. He was wearing a red vest, sandals and straw hat. Under one eye was a scar. Suddenly, the boy started firing off words that Spike couldn't understand. The two obviously didn't speak the same language. But he had recognized the word, "Konnichiwa" when the boy greeted him.

"Bloody hell, I'm in a Japanese hell dimension!" Spike groaned.

The boy before him didn't seem to mind that they couldn't communicate. He just smiled wider and started yelling. It must have been names, because he recognized the words, except "Usopp" and "Nami." The word "Chopper" set him a little on edge, as he was imagining an axe murderer. But "Zoro" made him think of the man in the black mask, running around and slashing a "Z" into everything with a rapier.

What he was greeted with was six times more unnatural. The boy's friends, they had to be. Two women, one with orange hair and one with black, a stuffed teddy bear of a talking reindeer, a long nosed boy, a blond in a suit, the freakiest looking man Spike had ever seen and… a sword wielding demon?

The demon-like man had messy green hair and held three swords. Not an unusual sight for a vampire who had travelled with the artistically painful Angelus. But Angelus had never a sword clenched between his teeth before…

The straw hat boy started talking rapidly again. The orange haired girl sighed, exasperated, as the green haired man placed the swords –Spike realized they were katana- into the sheaths at his side. Suddenly the orange haired girl started talking to Spike.

"Listen mates, I don't speak Japanese." Spike said.

"Hmm, English." The black haired woman said. "I speak some of it… I'm Nico Robin. This is Luffy, Nami, Zoro, Usopp, Chopper, Franky and Sanji."

Spike looked down at Chopper; the cute reindeer boy. So much for the axe murderer idea.

"I'm Spike." The vampire said after a quick pause. Then the woman, Robin, said a few quick words to the others.


It had been two weeks since Spike meet the people he knew now as the straw hat pirates. And what a strange two weeks it had been. The vampire learnt about things called "devil fruit" that turned people into demons. Luffy had been made into a rubber man, Chopper, originally a reindeer, became a reindeer man, and Robin was like one of those multi armed gods. Strangely enough, Franky had not eaten a devil fruit. The cyborg reminded Spike strongly of Adam.

Life was certainly interesting. Robin, an archaeologist who likely knew every language in existence, wouldn't explain anything until Spike had been properly disturbed. She liked to keep him in mystery.

As it was, Spike was enjoying a violent battle with his temporary crew against some Marines that day. It was a terrific, bloody battle that got the vampire's adrenaline going. He was about to leap into the middle of the most aggressive fights, when he saw Zoro fly by in a sharp sweep that sent many a Marine to the deck floor. The swordsman looked like the most demonic creature Spike had ever seen, even more so than when he had first arrived and Zoro had been training. Now, Zoro was drenched in both sweat and blood, reeking of pheromones. And that black bandana was something he only wore when at his most demonic. Yes, that bandana… it was attractive in such naughty ways.

Spike, as a vampire, had been all kinds of devious… and other demons made so much better sex partners… Zoro being, although human, demon enough for Spike.

So when the fight ended, Spike jumped Zoro. The mossy haired man was one of actions and little words, so the language barrier was not a problem. And if it became one? Robin seemed like the kind of woman who'd enjoy a show while she was translating.

However, that didn't seem necessary, for when Spike pulled away from his ravishing of Zoro, (the other man needed to breathe, right? Oh, and a chance to show that this may not be what he wanted), the swordsman rammed his tongue down Spike's throat. After that, it was only a matter of seconds before all clothes were torn off and other, more explicit, actions began. And then…

Angel appeared out of a sudden dimension worm hole, saying, "Fred sent me to get y… Spike, what are you doing!"

Spike looked up from his position on top of Zoro. "Oh, look, the great bloody ponce and his bloody excellent timing!"

Luckily, Zoro didn't mind an audience.