Well, okay. I got this started a lot earlier than planned. What can I say? I had one of those rare days when i was at work with absolutely NOTHING to do for HOURS on end. They don't come along that often, but aren't you glad when they do? Some of you may be wondering about the title of the chapter. (A)? It's because I only used the first chunk of the song for this chapter. The remainder of this song will appear in probably another two chapters or thereabouts.
The song 'All You Wanted' is by Michelle Branch as are all the songs I'll be using for this fic. I'm saying so here so I don't have to repeat myself each chapter. The songs are by Michelle Branch. All of them. Got it? Good. I will be manipulating lyrics here and there to suit my needs. (for example, changing 'she' to 'he' and flip-flopping verses if needed. I think it's better to do this than try to force the story to fit the song in all cases. I don't write songfic much, so...yeah. 'nuff said. I just thought if you're gonna do a songfic, who better to do one for than our beloved little sitar player, right?
This story will most likely run for about 8-10 chapters.
Warnings: Boy x Boy Love. Also only going to say this once.
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Pairing: Leon x Demyx
Standard Disclaimers Apply.
Chapter 1: All You Wanted (A)
I wanted to be like you
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away
Demyx didn't know why he was so nervous. It should be a relatively simple thing: just step around the corner and say, 'Hi! I'm Demyx and I think you're really interesting!' Except that that was extremely lame and he was feeling kind of like a big chicken, so he'd resorted to this almost-stalking. It was almost-stalking rather than the real thing because he never really meant to follow Squall Leonheart around Radiant Garden all day just trying to get up the nerve to say hello, but somehow it kept happening. Luckily, Leon hadn't seemed to notice. Yet.
Demyx raked his fingers through his blonde spikes and bit his lip, peering around the corner of the wall again. Leon was leaning to one side with his right hand on his hip and his head tilted slightly to the side in that way he had when he was listening to what the person talking said but not really buying word one of their excuses. It was Leon's 'i'm working really hard to be patient with you here' pose.
"...and so I...ah..."
Leon shifted his weight and crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for what Yuffie's undoubtedly dramatic climax to her story about Scrooge McDuck's great ice cream heist was going to be even though they both knew it was basically a load of bull.
Yuffie decided, just this once to quit while she was kinda/sorta ahead apparently, and said, "...so I'm ah...just gonna...get to work on that wall, you know, down over there...way down...like...on the other side of town. You're gonna be working over here today, right? On the busted pipes?"
She sounded a little too hopeful for the man's liking so he just shook his head and bent back down to the work she'd distracted him from. She didn't hesitate in hurrying off. Leon didn't have any good materia anyway—which as far as she was concerned was very, very inconsiderate of him.
Demyx dodged back behind the wall until she was gone and then peeked around the corner again. No matter how he looked at it, Leon was just...incredibly cool. He wasn't sure when that thought had stuck itself into his brain, but once it was there he couldn't get rid of it. It had started as just a teeny little almost crush, but somehow it had ballooned into this—spending day after day trailing after him and hoping he didn't notice until the blonde worked up the courage to approach him.
So far three weeks had passed and he hadn't managed it. At this rate, someone was definitely going to notice. He was determined though. Today would be the day. Definitely. Of course, he'd determined the same thing yesterday to no avail. The sitar player pouted. This had to end! Did people with hearts have this much trouble confessing too? Ooooh, there was no point getting into that now! Not at this stage! It wasn't like he was in love. A person without a heart couldn't fall in love, right? He wanted to have one, but that was neither here nor there at the moment. It was just...he couldn't get Leon off of his mind. He wanted to get to know him better, and maybe do things with him—like dates. And write songs for him, and maybe, you know, other things.
He blushed at that thought. It hadn't always been like this. It was just that he'd thought that Leon was cool, you know? Suave, even—very much the opposite of himself and all his awkward clumsiness and habit of messing things up. Demyx had thought if he watched the brunette a little he could learn to emulate that cool persona...but in the end it turned out he didn't want to emulate it as much as he wanted to experience it, to get Leon to notice him, and talk to him and maybe even like him. Then he'd started having these wholly inappropriate dreams and from that point on he was basically screwed.
Demyx wasn't stupid. He knew that entertaining such ideas was dangerous. He knew if anyone in the Organization found out he'd be in a whole heap of trouble, but that wasn't enough to stop him. And anyway, everyone was into their own private little things right now. No one really noticed when he was gone.
But anyway, back to the topic of Squall Leonheart. Whatever the reasons, Demyx had been watching him. Other than little breaks for sleep or food he found he'd gotten to know the man a little from a distance. He was surrounded by people but didn't seem to have any genuine attachments to any of them. He always seemed to hold something back. Radiant Garden was still kind of a mess and there was a lot of work to be done. Leon was the one who decided what was most important and everyone else seemed to just putter about until he gave them a job to do. He seemed a natural at it, but he was also the type to take on too much work himself—he'd rather do things on his own than ask for help, but when he needed it you'd better pull through if you didn't want to suffer him looking disappointed. Just watching him work made Demyx want to help…but Demyx wasn't very good at a lot of things and didn't want to get in the way either. It was the same with his little would-be confession. He wanted to approach the brunette, but at the same time he didn't want to bother him. He'd been so curious and so infatuated that he never realized before that Leon lacked something the others had. He couldn't put his finger on it at first. He'd thought the man was a loner, but that wasn't exactly it. The connection that forms between people, the strength of that bond…
Even in Organization XIII people had it. Demyx could see it in his comrades. But when it came to Squall Leonheart it just wasn't there.
I didn't know that it was so cold
And you needed someone
to show you the way
Demyx had somehow decided that he wanted to form that kind of connection with the brunette. But for that reason first impressions were all the more important. He didn't think of himself as much of a fighter. In fact, he kind of hated violence, but he'd spent a good week beating up on low level heartless to get some money so he could buy something nice to wear when they finally did meet. Now he wondered if Leon would hate the outfit he'd picked out. Well, it was too late to worry about that now. He adjusted the collar of his new baby-blue linen shirt and twittered a little nervously with anticipation. Leon had just leaned back and wiped his brow, moving to sit on a nearby stone ledge. Due to weeks of almost-stalking he knew this meant the brunette was about to take a break for lunch. He had to go now or he'd be stuck waiting until tomorrow due to that pressing urge to not be a bother to Leon. He didn't really seem to mind being a bother to anyone else.
He forced himself to round the corner (not as casually as he'd have liked) while Leon dug through his bag for his sandwich—a slightly squished ham and cheese on rye.
The blonde tripped, rather gracelessly, over his own two feet, face-planting on the sun-baked pavement. Leon stood, startled and edgy for an instant before determining no threat and put his food down to go over and help the blonde to his feet. "Are you alright?" he asked.
Demyx looked up, startled, taking in the situation. Leon was right in front of him…and he looked taller up close… He stood dazed a moment before feeling even stupider for it, blushing brightly as he realized the firm, warm grip on his arm was the brunette's as the man stared down at him questioningly. Demyx's face turned beet red and when he opened his mouth to speak a small squeaking noise was all that came out of his suddenly dry throat.
Leon blinked and let go, which was apparently the wrong thing to do if he'd wanted an answer because Demyx made a sputtering noise before covering his reddened face with his hands and making a run for it…
…only to plow head first into a poll. Leon winced slightly at the lard crunching noise as the blonde collided and fell to the floor again.
So I took your hand and decided
That when the time comes
I'd take you away
When Demyx regained consciousness it was too find Leon leaning over him, hair tumbling from behind his ear to frame firm features and cast shadows around smoke-colored eyes. He thought for a moment he was dreaming. After all, the man hovering over him like this couldn't happen in the real world, right? No chance. But he realized it was very much real when Leon frowned very slightly and brought up his right index finger to trail slowly from one side to the other. Demyx's eyes blinked, but then followed, and as memory sifted back all the embarrassing details, his cheeks reddened again.
Leon looked very mildly amused. "Well, you probably don't have a concussion," he said. 'But if you keep blushing like that you'll probably pass out again,' the scarred male thought. Now, Leon could be a little oblivious about the more emotional side of life sometimes, but he wasn't an idiot. Even he could see that this guy—someone he was pretty sure he'd never seen before in his entire life—had a rather blatantly obvious crush. He didn't really plan to mention it. For one, he didn't even know this guy's name. And Secondly, who had the time for that sort of thing? He was rather cute, but Leon had determined to just let it lay there now that it seemed the blonde hadn't injured himself too badly.
Demyx didn't give him the chance to brush it off though. He sat up too quickly and swayed a bit before making the sudden declaration. "I…!" Agh! It was so hard. Demyx grabbed his hand and looked up with such earnestness that Leon found himself feeling startled and somewhat uncertain as this strange young man declared, "I reallyreallyreally like you!" Ah! Crap! He hadn't meant to blurt it out like that. How embarrassingly lame! "So I…uh…" Demyx stuttered. "Sometime when you're not…you know…too busy…if it's not too much trouble…I thought maybe we…"
Leon sighed a little. He wasn't heartless. How could he flat out deny such an urgent confession? Damn. "Have you eaten yet?"
Demyx blinked at him as if he had three heads. Huh? What did food have to do with anything? "Ah…no?" He didn't sound sure about it, but he was just a little confused by the blatant non-sequitur and watched as Leon got up and moved back over to his bag, picking up the still uneaten sandwich and sitting back down, handing half over and leaning back against the nearby stone wall.
The blonde blushed again. Squished or no, Leon, the Leon, had just given him half of his lunch! He couldn't help a bright grin and instantly felt more relaxed from even that simple gesture. "My name is Demyx," he said very quietly before diving into the sandwich for something to do with his mouth other than sputter and babble. It was such a small thing, really—slightly over-warm ham and cheese that was half melted from sitting out in the sun on moderately crushed rye bread, but it meant so much to him.
"That's a unique name," Leon answered, idly picking off the crust and eating that first. He had no idea where he'd picked up such a strange habit, come to think of it. An extended silence, only slightly awkward passed before he said, "I'll be sure to remember it."
Demyx couldn't answer. He was afraid that if he opened his mouth an elated squeal might surface against his will. He finished off his sandwich as he watched Leon's strong fingers meticulously maul the remaining crust off of the remaining half, and the thoughtful way he chewed the crust—as if he didn't like the taste much but liked the idea of wasting food even less. "So…uhhmmm…" Demyx tried again. Leon had this way of being a little obtuse at times, like there were certain things he just wasn't comfortable expressing or didn't want people to know. It made him seem mysterious and aloof.
"I eat lunch at about 1:30 every day," Leon stated. "I guess today I was a little late." Pause. "Kind of your fault for running head first into a metal pole though."
Demyx was torn between being extremely embarrassed and doing more of that internal happy squealing. On the one hand, Leon was kind of teasing him, which was pretty mean, actually, but on the other, he'd just invited him to come by again! Okay, he'd said it in Leon, but Demyx had understood, and he was determined that tomorrow he was going to bring Leon something to eat—something tasty—something at least considerably better than a squished ham and cheese sandwich. Okay, so cooking wasn't really one of his skills either. How hard could it be? Right?
The somewhat peculiar, thoughtful look on Demyx's face made Leon wonder what the hell he'd just gotten himself into.
Demyx, on the other hand, was bound and determined now. Just a simple kindness that really didn't amount to all that much was enough to really get him going. His previous shyness forgotten, Demyx felt like he had a mission now: he was going to get Squall Leonheart to fall for him if it was the last thing he did.