A/N: Oh my God!! It's the last chapter, I'm gonna miss this story!! Thanks for everyone who has read this! I love you all. There's gonna be more stories out soon but they won't really be like this one... as in, they're kinda plotless... Oh well. Sorry to anyone who thinks they've waited too long for this chapter and want to kill me.
Warnings: Sasori's death, more Insane!Deidara, Tobi and a bit of TobiDei at the end, please don't kill me for it! OH, bad words too and this obviously is boyxboy.
Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, the oly Akatsuki member who would die would be OROCHIMARU!!! I love the rest of them too much. K. Msashi is evil... Killing off the best people...
I also don't own Fall Out Boy's song, 'Thanks For The Memories.'
He noticed the rain was starting to slow down. The gleaming blue eye of the twenty-year-old man stared at the sky.
"Deidara-sempai, we really should get going."
"No. Not yet. I'm going to make those bastards wait until they die…yeah."
It was just a mission. And it had been easy, capture the jinchuuriki of the ichibi, bring him back alive, extract the demon, seal it then dispose of the body and any rescue parties.
That is, it was easy. Until the last part.
"We sit here and wait, yeah?" Deidara asked his partner who sat next to him, hidden in Hiruko, Sasori's favorite puppet.
"Yes…" was the absent reply.
The blonde frowned, "Is there something bothering Danna, yeah?"
"Itachi told me to be careful today, before he left." Replied the puppet master who was watching the entrance carefully.
The teenager shifted on his seat where he sat on the former jinchuuriki. "Then, Danna, you should listen. Itachi can see into the future a bit, you know. Or at least, get vibes from the future."
The hidden man felt a smile flit over his usually expressionless face, "They were emotions. Itachi-kun said that they were your emotions. And they were very upset and chaotic feelings. Therefore, he connected the feelings to me. Although, I believe they could have applied to himself and Kisame or Hidan."
Deidara contemplated this for a moment then gave a soft smile, "I hope all of you are careful today, yeah."
"We'll all be fine. After all, we are Akatsuki." Sasori replied, his attention never leaving the door, "They're here, Deidara."
He saw the flaming red eyes of the Kyuubi container and had heard of Hatake Kakashi's reputation. He knew all of the attack patterns everyone in this group had except the old woman's.
And he knew what Itachi had been talking about. Or at least, he thought he knew.
"I'll take this one. Seems the Jinchuuriki wants this one back." Rasped Sasori from inside his puppet, using a different voice.
Deidara made his decision.
"Danna, this will probably make you angry but… I'll handle that jinchuuriki, yeah." He said, as though he was being arrogant.
"The assignment is one person per beast… Don't push it, Deidara." Sasori replied, the goal in his mind similar to his partner's.
"But if an artist doesn't inspiration, his sentiments are dulled, Danna," replied the blonde, "Besides, I hear the Kyuubi jinchuuriki is considerably stronger, yeah."
"You call your explosions art? Real art is something that lasts into the future, something eternal." Growled Sasori. They spoke their lines as though reading from a script, memorized perfectly but written by contrasting authors.
"I respect you but the true beauty of art is in its singular, momentary life." Deidara retorted. Somewhere, during their conversation, the subject of their argument had attempted to attack.
"Deidara, you little shit. Are you trying to piss me off?"
"Well then, I was right when I said that it'd probably make you mad, yeah?!"
"My fine art is in my explosives," continued the young Akatsuki member. "Completely different from your little puppet show, yeah."
The older man could only watch in horror as the lure was swallowed by his former charge's figurine. Hiruko's tail lashed out toward the blonde in a last ditch attempt to achieve the puppet master's goal and detain the other man's goal.
Protect him from the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki.
The blonde watched as the jinchuuriki chased after him, satisfied and sure that his Danna would be safe. There was only so much a girl and an old woman could do to his former babysitter. Hell, Sasori had survived him and that made the man immortal in Deidara's eyes. No one survived him. Only the immortal.
Zetsu's report made Deidara laugh. Laugh hysterically.
"That was a great joke, Zetsu, yeah. Danna, my danna, dead? The immortal don't die, you schizo freak. Probably a genjutsu. Sasori-danna is probably so embarrassed that he got his ass beaten by his grandmother and a pink-haired girl so he's probably hiding somewhere to lick his wounds and puff up his ego again."
The sad thing was, that Deidara didn't even realize his subconscious accepted Sasori's death and had already started inheriting his danna's traits of foul language and lying to himself.
"Don't be stupid, Leader-sama. Why the hell would I need a new partner if mine is still alive, yeah?" chortled the blonde as he disappeared from the sealing room after sealing the Nibi with the rest of Akatsuki.
The faces of the criminals were impassive as turmoil boiled underneath the masks of uncaring people. It was not a fun experience to see one of the few constants in their unstable lives crack into thousands of pieces.
"Deidara-senpai!" shouted an orange swirly mask, wearing and Akatsuki cloak and a ring on his left thumb finger.
The blonde scowled, "What do you think you're doing, wearing you ring on that finger? Sasori-danna wears his ring there, yeah. As Orochimaru's replacement, you're supposed to wear it on your pinky finger, baaaakaaaaa." He reprimanded.
Tobi stiffened as Deidara moved the ring to what the deranged blonde thought was the right finger.
"There, now it's right, yeah." Chirped the blonde, a smug expression on his face.
"Thank you, senpai." Tobi said softly before turning heel and walking away to leave Deidara with an empty Hiruko puppet.
"You know, danna, it might be a good idea to come out of Hiruko once in a while, get some fresh air, you know, yeah?"
Tobi noticed that not once during the exchange had his senpai's facial expression changed.
"Sasori-danna hasn't talked to me at all this week and he won't come for dinner anymore. Maybe he's sick, yeah? Itachi, do you think you could look at Danna later? His medical ninjutsu sucks and yours is probably the best of everyone here, yeah. Hidan, why don't you come visit me and Sasori-danna sometime? Kisame, you should come too. You know, you guys are really quiet lately, do you guys feel all right, yeah?" bright chatter spilled from a pale, tired face to an empty table.
Sharingan red eyes watched from an obscure corner.
When Hidan and Kakuzu were killed, there was a mutual, silent agreement with everyone in Akatsuki to not inform the broken little blonde.
"Itachi, I haven't seen Hidan or Kakuzu lately, yeah. Are they on a mission?"
"Yeah. They're on a mission. They probably won't come back for a long, long time, Deidara."
"I miss Hidan. Why isn't Leader giving me and Sasori-danna any missions?"
Weeks passed. Leader told everyone in Akatsuki to bring Deidara out of his world.
Itachi had already told everyone about the last time Deidara had shattered. Except for Tobi. Tobi hadn't been allowed to hear the story. So only Tobi attempted to help his senpai.
"Deidara-senpai. Sasori-san is dead. He died half a year ago. Hidan died two months ago. Kakuzu did too."
"Don't be ridiculous, Tobi. Immortal people can't die."
That was the first try.
"Look, Deidara-senpai! Hiruko is empty! Sasori-san is dead, his grandmother and the Kyuubi kid's teammate killed him. See, I'm wearing Sasori-san's ring, not Orochimaru's ring. He's dead, Deidara-senpai."
Deidara stared blankly at the person with the orange mask who had split open Hiruko to reveal nothing. Absolutely nothing.
"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SAOSRI-DANNA?!?" shrieked the suddenly hysterical blonde. He threw himself at Tobi, attempting to kill him with no more than his skinny malnourished body.
Tobi stood there and let the screaming blonde attempt to pound him with weak, fragile blows.
That was the second try.
"Itachi! Tobi killed Sasori-danna! But, Sasori-danna can't die, how did Tobi kill him, he's immortal, Danna can't die if he's immortal, an idiot like Tobi couldn't possibly kill Sasori-danna, where's Sasori-danna, why isn't he here?!" babbled the very much insane Iwa-nin, throwing himself at his friend.
The black haired teenager held the shaking man until he had passed out. Carrying the living skeleton to the infirmary, he began setting up an IV as the rest of the remaining Akatsuki watched on as numerous tubes and needles were inserted into the half dead blonde.
"He's not getting better, is he?" asked Tobi sadly.
The Uchiha looked at the depressed younger man and graced him with a warm, rare smile.
"No, Tobi. He's getting better. Deidara has accepted that Sasori is dead. Thank you."
A single, blue eye cracked open to a dimly lit room and found a lone figure sitting in a corner.
The other male rushed over, "Deidara-senpai! How are you feeling?"
"Like shit. Could I have some water?" came the weak whispered request.
Tobi quickly poured water from a pitcher into a cup and helped the blonde sit up to drink it. Finished, he set the cup on a stand and laid the thin body back down on the bed.
"So…" Deidara said, his voice weak from under use, "how long have I been out of it?"
"Two weeks, Deidara-senpai." Tobi answered carefully, knowing full well he was treading on thin ice.
"Oh. I think I'm going to sleep a bit longer, Tobi. Just until I collect my thoughts, yeah?" and with that the older man fell asleep.
The next time he woke up, it was to Kisame who sat in the corner, polishing Samehada. Kisame raised his head, "Three days since you last woke up." He said before Deidara opened his mouth. The blonde nodded mutely and took to staring at the ceiling, listening to his heart monitor beep at a rate slower than he could have thought possible.
Kisame shrugged, knowing the thoughts of the other Akatsuki nin, "You've been in coma. Of course your heart rate will slow to an unimaginable rate. But as long as the beats per minute doesn't fall below forty then you should be fine, or at least that's what Itachi said. Since you're doped up on sedatives right now too."
"How?" was the single word that presented thousands of answers and millions of answers.
"This might take a while. Try to stay awake, alright?" Kisame said, teasing a bit.
"I've only been sleeping for 408 hours, I don't think I can sleep much longer."
"For starters, you were in coma because your mind couldn't take the stress anymore. So it shut down to recuperate. Your body hasn't been getting the nutrition it needs either so it went bye-bye as well. It won't ever be perfect, just so you know but if it makes you feel better, there isn't a single person here who's mind is still in perfect condition."
"The stress… was caused by Sasori's death. He died fighting his grandmother and that girl on the Kyuubi kid's team. Stabbed in the heart by two puppets he made in the image of his parents, or so Zetsu says. His grandmother is dead though, died when she used a Tensei ninjutsu to save the ichibi jinchuuriki. The girl is still alive…" Kisame trailed off.
"No, I don't want revenge. I'm sure Sasori-danna had it coming to him, he's made a lot of enemies. This is just the first one strong enough to put him down." Whispered Deidara as tears began to form. He quickly wiped them away.
"Hidan is… well, he's not technically dead but he's incapacitated. He's been blown into a million pieces and buried under rock. Leader said that Hidan is no longer considered a member of Akatsuki."
"After Zetsu told you the news about Sasori's death, you went insane. You accused Tobi of Sasori's death when you saw him with Sasori's ring. Continued for about half a year then you went comatose."
The blonde was silent for a while as he slowly absorbed the information, not noticing when Itachi came in and ran off to alert the rest of Akatsuki about his current state. Leader was soon checking Deidara over as well.
"You've been out of commission for over half a year, Deidara. Therefore, you'll need to re-apply to Akatsuki, provided you still want to be a member." Leader got up to leave the room only to pause at the door. "It's good to have you back. We'd like for you to stay."
"I'll think about it."
With a tired sigh, the blonde retreated back to the recesses of his mind where everyone was alive and they were all just… normal people who were just as old as they looked.
Deidara wandered through the dry, cracked landscape of his mind and stepped forward to one of the larger crevasses. Warm, comforting darkness reached out and pulled him in. The blue eye closed and he fell, offering no resistance.
"Hey there, brat."
And there stood his former babysitter, caretaker, partner and the first person to ever take the time to stop, pick him up, put him back together and wait for him.
Padding over to Sasori, he soon found himself surrounded by puppets, greeting and begging him for attention. Deidara smiled at all of them, greeting them as though they were alive and paying special attention to Sasori's parents. Finished, he seated himself on Hiruko, smiling at the soft, kind expression on his Danna's face.
The redhead sat next to the other male on the puppet's back, pulling the slender frame onto his lap as a pair of hands immediately reached for the silken gold locks.
"So how's your life been, Dei-chan?" was how the conversation started, a warm comfortable atmosphere surrounding the two. The man in question gave a tired sigh, snuggling closer to the puppet master.
"As if you don't know, yeah. Same old, same old. People dying, disappearing from your life every day as your sanity is slowly chipped away. Nobody you want to trust or care about but somehow caring anyway. Then when they disappear, it hurts. Because you should known better, known they wouldn't last. Danna," Deidara whispered as he brought his own hands up to entwine with the other man's, "Is there no one left in this broken world who can support a person? We are all so unstable…"
Deidara continued, "Did you know, Sasori-danna? Hidan is immortal but he's gone. Itachi is going blind; that dojutsu he uses is corroding his eyesight. He knows this. I think that one of these days, he might just decide he'd rather die before going blind. So Kisame-kun is worried. If… if Itachi dies, I know Kisame will kill himself. Leader knows this too. He's getting more agitated every day. Zetsu-san is always arguing every day because they're worried about Tobi. Kakuzu is dead. Tobi… he's less talkative, you know? I think it's my fault… And Sasori-danna… You're dead."
"Why'd you go and die, Danna? I need you, yeah."
Sasori had no answer but proceeded to loosen his hands from the blonde's. He replied with another question.
"What happened after I died? As in. what did you do?"
Deidara snickered. "Funny story, really. I broke. Fell on the floor and had people grind me into dust. Then the ichibi came along, reformed me and had Itachi fire me back into me with his Amaterasu. So now I'm made of super glass."
The redhead laid his head on the other man's shoulder, closing his eyes as the dark became a dreary, cold, unwelcoming weight on both their shoulders. "I'm sorry Dei. I'm sorry. I always say I'll be there when you fall but somehow… And in the end, all I can do is apologize."
"Just don't let me fall in the first place, Danna." Was the simple answer.
"But I can't even do that anymore. You know it, too."
Deidara smiled sadly and stood, pulling the puppet master up as well.
"Yeah, I know. But it's enough that you're here right now. And stay here, yeah? Just so you can keep me company one day when everyone's dead and I'm all on my lonesome."
"You know I'm stuck here, Dei." Replied Sasori.
The blonde sighed and stretched as he looked over all the puppets. "I kinda wish Danna had turned himself into a puppet too, yeah… just to ensure he'd stay with me forever 'til the end of time, you know?"
"You don't believe in eternal art."
"Ah, but I believe in an eternal memory of my Sasori-danna." Deidara grinned cheekily before suddenly placing a chaste kiss on Sasori's mouth. When said man raised a fine brow, the clay-user gave a sweet smile in return.
"When I first met Danna, I promised myself that Danna would be my first kiss. And now after a bazillion years of waiting, he is."
Sasori merely pulled the blonde back and pressed his lips against Deidara's again. He drew away and smirked.
"No worries, I've saved my first kiss for you as well. But sorry about the second one, I gave that one away to this pretty blonde boy who has an unhealthy obsession with clay…"
"What?!? B-but Danna!! I wanted to be-"
"My second kiss?" purred Sasori, cupping a hand around Deidara's face. "It's okay, Dei-chan, you can be my third." He slid an arm around the waist of the furiously blushing blonde, drawing him closer.
"N-no, I wasn't going to say that! Wait, hey, I was your-" He never finished.
Deidara awoke with a start, immediately slapping a hand to his mouth, remembering his encounter with his dead partner.
"DAMMIT, DANNA, YOU DID NOT NEED TO GO AND SAY THAT!!" he screeched, his yell echoing throughout the entire hideout. Leader who had been leaning back in his chair toppled over and if it weren't for his mad ninja skills, he would have broken his neck.
The same went for Itachi who was sleeping on his bed, who could have broken an arm; Kisame who was polishing Samehada and could have lost a his hand; Zetsu who almost fell into a carnivorous plant he was watering which would have eaten him and Tobi who had been sitting on a chair in Deidara's room, neatly falling over and banging his head on the hard concrete floor.
"Deidara-senpai! You're awake?! But, you do know that-" Tobi immediately rushed to the bed, only to have his excited chatter cut short.
"Yes, dammit, I know that Sasori-danna's dead, okay? And yes, I'm awake, thanks for stating the obvious, Tobi, you idiot." Deidara grumbled.
"I'm glad you're awake, Deidara-senpai." Tobi replied sincerely. Deidara winced, you could just hear the cheerfulness in Tobi's voice.
"Tobi, it's too early for this level of happy and pink and all that's freaking gay and girly, alright?" Deidara groaned and cracked his neck. "Ugh, so stiff. Doesn't my body move when I'm sleeping or whatever?!?" he whined.
"You sleep like a dead man." Said Itachi from the doorway who yawned, still in nightclothes. "But just so you know, it's six in the evening. Had a good conversation with your boyfriend?"
"Yes." He replied, a vein under his eye twitching.
"Deidara, what did Sasori say?" Leader asked briskly, as he strode into the room, the remaining Akatsuki members trailing behind.
"He said that I was to stay in the Akatsuki and you would let me automatically regain my position or else he'd take over my body and blow up the cave because I need to find a living boyfriend among you people to replace him." Deidara said shortly, the vein still twitching. "And that if you touched his puppets, you'd die painfully."
"It would appear that now he's dead, he has no fears." Leader commented thoughtfully. "But at any rate, welcome back Deidara. And I do believe we'll need to set up some kind of blind date for you soon."
"Somebody kill me, please, yeah." Groaned the blonde from underneath his covers.
One year later
Deidara leaned against the back of Sasori's gravestone, ignoring the complaints of his Danna about disrespecting graves. Tobi stood away from him, picking flowers off trees and from the water to decorate the grave.
"No cherry blossoms, Tobi! Sasori-danna doesn't like them!" Deidara called. He returned to staring at the sky as the clouds collected.
I'm gonna make you bend and break (it sent you to me without wings)
Say a prayer, but let the good times roll
"Hey, Sasori-danna, I wanna go look at that stall, un."
"Okay. Let's go. Are you going to buy anything?"
In case God doesn't show
"Deidara? Hey, are you here?"
And I want these words to make things right
But it's the wrongs that makes the words come to life
You weren't there when he needed you… Don't you know? People need people. Or they'll implode.
Who does he think he is (if that's the worst you got better put your fingers back to the keys)I'm looking forward to the future
All right. Let's go find them, un.
But my eyesight is going bad
And this crystal ball
It's always cloudy except for
When you look into the past
"With the puppets, I could pretend that they were there, that they were alive and that they could love me. But this happened when I was four and I could only live in this make believe world for all of two minutes. Then my chakra strings would break and I would be torn from my fantasy world."
One night stand
One night stand, OH!
They say I only think in the form of
Crunching numbers in hotel rooms
Collecting page six lovers
Get me out of my mind
"DAMMIT DEIDARA, YOU HAVE TO STOP RUNNING FROM REALITY! YOUR PARENTS ARE DEAD AND YOU DOING THIS WILL NOT BRING THEM BACK TO LIFE!"
Gets you out of those clothes
I'm a line away from
Getting you into the mood
One night and one more time
"Hey, Tobi. Danna wanted me to tell you something. It's important so don't you ever forget, yeah?"
Thanks for the memories
Even though they weren't so great
"Okay, listen close, yeah? Sasori-danna told me this once."
He tastes like you only sweeter
"People need people, yeah? 'Cause in this world, the stress of living, the pressure of existing in this world, it's enough to crush a body. A mind. A person, you know? So you need people to help you to fill you, and support you from the inside out, yeah? To help bear the pressure of life 'cause no one can support themselves. People need people or else they'll implode."
"So no matter what, always make sure that there's people who are close to support you. And when they're too fragile to support you, then you need to support them first. When you do it, you make a connection; you share yourself. Therefore, you should never be selfish and hurt yourself or sacrifice yourself for someone else. You don't have the right because you'll never belong to just yourself."
One night yeah one more time
"For someone who managed to get themselves stuck in you of all people, Deidara-senpai, Sasori-san seems unexpectedly wise."
Thanks for the memories
"What's that supposed to mean, Tobi, yeah?!?"
Thanks for the memories
Tobi gave no reply, only removing his mask, moving closer so he could kiss the blonde.
See he tastes like you only sweeter
Sasori watched from the back of Deidara's mind, smiling and content that his Dei had found someone else. Someone who would never need to catch him when he fell because he'd be there to make sure that Deidara would never fall.