Something Else

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and everything related belongs first, and foremost, to JKR and then to her partnerships with Scholastics, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros., etc.

Summary: She walked past you, brushing her hands on your shoulders. "Do you ever want to do something, even if you know it's wrong?" she whispered in your ear.

Author's Note: I'm not sure if nobody reads fanfiction anymore, or if they simply don't like my stories, but I'll keep posting anyway.


Something Else

She was young and lively then. And one thing you'd always remember is that she could always make you laugh. Even when the times were bad and you were down more than ever before, she was there to make your world just a little bit brighter.

She'd always come to you cheerfully, a broad smile on her face, "Hello, Siri!" she'd say. A look on your face would follow, and that's when she knew it was show time. She went to any lengths to make you laugh, anything to make Sirius smile -- Sirius was upset? No, she just would not allow it.

She quickly became one of your truest and closest friends and you valued her just like you valued her boyfriend, your best friend James. Together, they made a couple all envied. The only thought that occurred in your head was how lucky they are and how lonely you were. Every kiss they shared only reminded you how much you longed to share a love like them with someone else. And though they started off on bad terms, once they were together, there was no stopping them. They were made for each other.

As time went on, though, you found yourself jealous for other reasons.

One particular day, you remember it so well: you were as down as ever, and she strode up to you and began her cheery hello.

"Hey there, my good friend!"

She was just about to leave on Holiday, for your Christmas in seventh year.

"How's it going?" She mocked tears turning toward you saying, "I just wanted to say goodbye for my trip... which will only be two weeks, but I'm sure, to you, it will feel like an eternity."

You can't help but smile.

She continued, "I don't know how you'll survive without me."

You laughed, "You're something else."

"Just trying to make you smile," she said innocently.

"Glad someone can," you said as an after thought, looking toward your homework.

She walked past you, brushing her hands on your shoulders. "Do you ever want to do something, even if you know it's wrong?" she whispered in your ear.

From that moment on, things changed. You didn't know what she'd meant, of course, but your mind made an assumption. You seemed to notice her stare more, her eyes traveling to you. Sometimes, you thought there was even a bit of a longing in her eyes. But you convinced yourself it must be something else...

You never knew of the internal battle she fought with herself after she muttered that question to you. Her heart hated her mind for it, for letting that one phrase slip, when it wasn't even anything...But you, you who knew internal struggles all your life, who grew up being taught something wrong, as though your parents pointed left and told you it was right, you, you knew there was something going on in her mind. And your heart couldn't seem to take it.

You were happy and sad the day they married. Sure, anyone who looked back on it would see the smiling bright-eyed Sirius Black, James Potter's best friend and best man who was more than overjoyed to see the union of a couple so perfect for each other. And in your heart you were happy, you were beyond words, filled with a happiness knowing that two people, in such terrible times, could escape all the pain and despair and find love.

As they drove off to their honeymoon, you stood there in the crowd of well-wishers. James beamed at you and you waved back. Lily, who looked more beautiful than you'd seen in all the nine years of knowing her, gave you a small smile and a nod. You give a small smile back and for a second you think you see, in her eyes that longing again. A longing you saw, reappear faithfully to her eyes and had since that one day in seventh year.

You never knew what it meant, but you know that the only thing you two ever were was friends, and you never doubted that. Them getting married never sealed this fate of sorrow, of disappointment with you... You knew that that look - whatever it was - was not anything. And even if it were something, nothing would ever come from it.

Even now, when you stare at their child, their teenage Harry, you look into those emerald eyes, mirroring his mothers and you think back on that one night where she told you something about her you never saw again. If there was something she wanted, she never got it. It occurs to you now as you see him, that maybe there was something you wanted and never got from that beautiful green-eyed girl. But then you shake your head, that can't be it... It must be something else.