Rated: K+

Summary: Jirou, Atobe and Hiyoshi pitch in to get the couple together. It doesn't help that Oshitari is being insensitive and Mukahi is trying to avoid the subject. Another story in the whole Dirty Pair drama series.

Pairings: Atoji onesided Dirty

Category: general

Characters: Jirou, Hiyoshi, Atobe, Mukahi and Oshitari

Disclaimer: Konomi Takeshi owns PoT

Direct Sequel to Advice from Jirou, The Accident and Hospital Food:

Hyotei Phobia

Hyotei Library Session

Bets and Lovers

Book of Stupidity

Fights and Idiots

Switching Places

Book of Stupidity 2

Melting Ice

Lost in Tennis

Of Cameras and Attention

Street Tennis

Oresama's Journal

Advice from Jirou

The Park and the Church

The Accident

Unhappy Information

Hospital Food

Oshitari didn't know what to do; he couldn't face Mukahi now, he didn't even want to. Why did he back out of visiting him? He could've easily skipped the competition, so why didn't he? Oshitari was confused underneath that cool exterior of his. Confused and lost, and he hated it, he hadn't felt that way since the time he was a freshman, but that time, he had met Mukahi and everything proceeded smoothly. Mukahi wasn't here anymore; maybe that was why he was so confused, so lost…


Oshitari turned around in time to see a Jirou running towards him, but with too much speed, Jirou sped past him and into a garbage can. Oshitari pulled Jirou up and asked, "What is it?"

"I wanna tell you something!"


"I think you should say thanks to Muka-kun."

"I was going to." Oshitari lied.

"Oh…" Jirou hesitated fro a moment, "Well you know it's obvious right?"

"What is?"

"Muka-kun likes you!!!"

"He likes you too, Jirou, what of it?" Oshitari stated, not comprehending Jirou's meaning at all.

"Tari-kun you really are insensitive, even though you watch all those sappy movies…" Jirou pouted and continued. "He loves you!"

"OH…" Was all Oshitari could say as his glasses slipped.

"You knew right?" Jirou looked up at him testily, "I mean the WHOLE team kinda sensed it."

"I had an idea, I believe." Oshitari looked uncomfortable and this was rare being the king of cool; the insensitive part of Jirou wished he had a camera. (I know I would)

"Tari-kun, you're so dense! Who else cares that much about you?" Jirou asked, his eyes wide with annoyance threatening to boil into anger.


"Who else would do what Muka-kun has done for you?!?!?" Jirou was angry now, and Jirou was NEVER angry. "Who else would jump in front of a truck for you?!" He reached up and snatched Oshitari's collar and began shaking him. "When we visited the hospital, do you know what he said to me? He said 'I guess it's too late to go back now, but I don't regret a thing, even though I'm a mess, as long as Yuushi's still okay.' Tari-kun, he won't be able to play tennis for a long time, and this is his last year! He'll be graduating you know! Do you understand what he gave up for you?" Jirou let go of Oshitari and stepped back, still angry.

"I…" Oshitari was speechless; he never thought Mukahi would really say those things, insensitive, bitchy, obnoxious Mukahi…

"People say you're the romantic one, but you…it's all a façade isn't it? I'm disappointed in you, Tari-kun." When Jirou was disappointed in you, you've really messed up. "Go talk to Muka-kun, and don't screw up okay?" Jirou turned and ran away.

Jirou telling Oshitari to not screw up? Oshitari wanted to laugh but he didn't because Oshitari, the tensai, admits that he screwed up this time. Romantic Oshitari, sappy Oshitari, cool Oshitari, he really blew it with his best friend… yet it wasn't that he didn't know what to do; he just didn't think he could do it. Time after time, he had rehearsed the scene with Mukahi in his head yet, he could never really play it.

Oshitari walked into the empty clubhouse and sat down, he really needed time to think, but Atobe came in.

"Yuushi." A ruffled Atobe with his shirt open, exposing his torso, and his tie hanging limply around his neck confronted Oshitari, it was obvious he was just with Jirou.

"What is it now?"

"What did you do to Jirou?"

"Nothing." Oshitari surveyed Atobe fully.

"Jirou hasn't been himself today."


"What do you mean by and, ahhh? Ore-sama demands an answer," it was clear to Atobe that Oshitari wasn't going to reply to Atobe, so he assumed the buchou tone. (Didn't work well because of what he was wearing)

"You should ask someone else."

"Yuushi, you know as well as ore-sama that Jirou is never mad, don't be such a stubborn fool!"

"I am NOT a stubborn fool!" Oshitari raised his voice and regretted it immediately; he just showed Atobe that there was something wrong.

"Oshitari Yuushi, you have never been as much of a stubborn fool as you are now." Atobe said, "Why can't you even talk to the person that saved your life?"


"Ore-sama will not interfere with other people's personal affairs, but if you don't resolve this by the Kantou tournament, both of you will be kicked off the team, this is not a threat."

"Understood." Oshitari said and walked away.


"Mukahi-senpai?" Hiyoshi entered the hospital room, flowers in hand.

"Hiyoshi?" Mukahi looked up, surprised.

"Akutagawa-senpai is on his way." Hiyoshi explained, sitting down.

"I see."

"How are the wounds?"

"They don't hurt as much anymore…" Mukahi lied.

"That's good." Hiyoshi wondered why he had agreed to come, he admired his senpai for numerous reasons but he also thought that his senpai was insane and not too smart; Mukahi-senpai seemed to be the stem of most of the problems on the team. Oshitari didn't seem to return Mukahi's love, so maybe Hiyoshi pitied his senpai. Hiyoshi had never experienced unrequited love; he had never experienced love in general because he carefully guarded his heart against intruders. He didn't have time for love; no, he was too busy hatching schemes, trying to gekokujou his senpai-tachi. In that way, he admired his Mukahi-senpai, for …having the courage to love.

"So how're you finding the hospital?" Hiyoshi asked, putting the flowers in some water.

"Ugh" Mukahi made a face, "food still sucks."

"Should I have gotten you food instead of flowers?" Hiyoshi asked, remembering Mukahi making a scene last time.

"Doesn't matter anyways, maybe the flowers will put the nurses in a good mood." Mukahi rolled his eyes, "They always seem like someone owes them something."

"You should stop teasing the nurses, Mukahi-senpai…"

"How did YOU know I was teasing the nurses?!"

"It was pretty obvious…" Hiyoshi shrugged.

"Well, that doesn't matter, they're asking for it anyways, so how's practise?"

"Same as always, except Oshitari-senpai is playing singles more and more."

"He doesn't miss playing doubles?" Mukahi asked a bit TOO eagerly.

Hiyoshi shrugged again, wondering what he should tell his senpai, "You never could tell with Oshitari-senpai."

"Oh…" Mukahi looked down, "Do you think I'm stupid too?"


"Do you think I'm stupid? Now the whole world knows and Yuushi still won't talk to me."

"I don't think you're stupid, senpai." Hiyoshi mumbled, his voice nothing more than a whisper. "I think you're really brave… I wouldn't have had the courage to… do what you did."

"But Yuushi probably hates me now." Mukahi looked down on his white sheets, his face set in a pout.

"How could he hate you when you saved his life?" Hiyoshi asked, "he's just confused, probably, and I'm sure Oshitari-senpai wouldn't like to admit to being confused, after all, it IS Oshitari-senpai."

"You're right," Mukahi looked up, a sloppy grin set on his face, "Yuushi is an idiot when he gets confused. I should know."

The door opened and a hyper Jirou bounced in, well, a hyper but angry Jirou. "MUKA-KUN!!! TARI-KUN IS BEING A BAKA!!!"

"Calm down, Jirou-senpai, not so loud, you'll get kicked out." Hiyoshi warned, a finger at his lips.

"Well he is." Jirou pouted, sitting himself down on the ground, "And food here does suck!"

"What'd he do to get YOU mad?" Mukahi demanded.

"Nothing, it's what he DIDN'T do that bugs me!"

"Well what didn't he do?" Hiyoshi asked.

"He still won't say thanks to you! He still won't talk to you!" Jirou played with his tie.

"Oh well that again." Mukahi rolled his eyes, "Jirou, it's Yuushi, you know what he's like."

"And you're defending him?" Jirou demanded, annoyed as ever, "Don't defend him! he's such an idiot, why doesn't he just come clean?"

"It doesn't matter much, let's not talk about that." Mukahi said quickly, turning his face away. "But next time one of you guys visit, bring me some cake!"


"Strawberry cake!"

"Okay, I'll go tell Tari-kun." Jirou bounced happily out the door, his cell phone in hand.


"Too late! I'll make sure Tari-kun visits you!"


A/N: originally I wasn't going to write this, but I felt like it. This was supposed to go in with Hospital Food but I wanted to make Hospital Food short and sweet. So yeah. I hope you liked it…I know Oshitari Yuushi isn't that much of an idiot and Oshitari Yuushi fans may flame me if they want but… I think Oshitari deserves to be a little confused once in a while…

Oh and I've found out the perfect name for a child: Atobe Wolfgang Ramsbottom. Wolfgang for Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart (who's, like, my hero). That kid will hate me soooo much! Sry I just wanted to randomly put that there… to amuse Ral and Ica, though Ica would say i failed...

To ICA: if you're reading this, go study business instead, you're failing... try to pass your exams.