Title: Days That End in Y
Rating: M (no full lemon though (tear tear) just slightly explicit)
Author: darkalbino/illi (me)
sup peeps! so yeah, me and my friends are always making these jokes about molesting each other and raping each other and we say...well, you'll see what we say, but poor Naru-chan is about to make the WORST (or best, depending on how you look at it) decision in his life!
Summary: Naruto should start thinking before he acts...
Disclaimer: (ties up Kishimoto) MUWAHAHAHH!! now they are MINE! (police come)...SHIT! (runs away)
XXXDays That End In YXXX
"Dobe, how the fuck are you even going to ask me something like that?" Sasuke asked the blonde idiot in disbelief.
"AW! C'mon Sasuke! Why not?"
"How many times do I have to tell you baka, I do not like Sakura. I do not want to be anywhere near her. I do not want to breathe the same AIR as her. So why in the HELL am I going to want to go to her party?"
Naruto frowned and straddled his boyfriend's hips on the bed, "You're just being a bastard as always. It's her sweet sixteen! How could you not want to go?"
"Because she'll probably try and get me drunk and have her way with me, and then, I'd have to kill her, which would send me to jail and separate us."
Naruto blinked, "And you've thought about this, have you?"
Sasuke crossed his arms defiantly, "Of course I have, one of us has to be able to think."
Naruto frowned for a moment before quirking his lips in a grin, "C'mon Sasu-chan..." he slowly grinded his hips into the other boy and slid his fingers up a bare, pale chest, "please come? Maybe we could sneak in a quickie at her house..." he lightly nipped at the raven's neck, eliciting a groan of pleasure, "In her bathroom...or maybe on her bed...wouldn't that be..." a lick along the cool shell of an ear, "naughty?"
Sasuke moaned and stuck his hand in orange pants, gripping the slowly awakening member firmly, "Don't play with me dobe."
Naruto smiled and lost his fingers in a forest of black hair, tugging it softly, "But I thought you liked it when I played with you teme, I know you're little friend down there does." He placed a palm on Sasuke's crotch and began rubbing it lightly through the thin cloth of his boxers, "Maybe he'd like to come out and play instead?"
Sasuke threw his head back and released a deep moan, circling his thumb over the slit on the head of the blonde's member that was still in his grasp, "Fuck..."
"Mmm...do you want me now Sasuke?" the tan teen whispered huskily in the other's ear.
"You know I need you moron...stop fucking around."
Naruto grinned, "I thought the point was for me to fuck around, teme."
"Dammit, you know what I mean."
"Hmm...I suppose...but you have to promise me something first."
Naruto pushed his body completely into the boy, not knowing where one started and the other ended, "Promise me...Sasuke-kun..." he whispered oh so seductively.
"What koi?" Sasuke gasped out at a particularly rough rub to his dick.
"Nhn...tell me...that we can go...to Sakura's party."
All motion stopped.
Sasuke frowned, "No." he took his hand out of the other's pants.
Naruto gaped at him, "What?! Are you kidding me? There's no way that didn't work!"
Aw well, the moment was ruined.
"Dobe, it'll take more than sexual satisfaction to get me to go to that pink slut's party."
"Dammit Sasuke! C'mon! Please?! I'll do anything! Please! I really wanna go! I wanna go with you!"
Sasuke was about to open his mouth to protest when something registered in his mind...'anything' huh?
He smirked, "Alright Naruto, I'll go to the hell hole on ONE condition."
Naruto's face brightened up considerably, "What? What's the condition?"
His smirk grew devilish, "You have to give me your word on it. Do I have your word?"
Naruto pressed his lips to the raven's and mewled softly before pulling away, smiling, "Sealed with a kiss."
'Heh, cute baka' , "Okay koi, the condition is...from now on, we have sex on everyday that ends with Y."
Naruto snorted, "Pft! Of course I'll agree to that! Man Sasuke, you can be such a dumbass some...hey...hey! Hey wait a minute!"
"You-You bastard! You tricked me! I'm not agreeing to that!"
Sasuke put his arms behind his head with a satisfied smile, "Too late dobe, you gave me your word"
"But...but that's not fair!"
The Uchiha rolled his eyes, "What's that nindo of yours? 'I never go back on my word'? Isn't that it?"
"That doesn't apply to this!"
"Dumbass, your nindo applies to everything, if it didn't, you wouldn't be able to call yourself a ninja."
Tears of frustration sprung into the blonde's eyes, "You horny asshole! You knew I'd say yes didn't you?!"
"Tch, of course I did."
"Just what the hell are you trying to do? Paralyze me?"
"What's wrong with me wanting to make love to you everyday of the week?"
"Because it's not "everyday of the week" with you! It's every second of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every fucking year!"
"So? What's wrong with that?"
Naruto lightly thumped his head against his lover's chest, "Are you sure you weren't suppose to be a rabbit when you were born?"
Sasuke shrugged, "Hn...maybe, but dobe," he lifted the blonde's chin, "just because I love to fuck the living the daylights out of you, it doesn't mean I don't love you as well, you do know that?"
Naruto smiled and took the hand from under his chin to brush his lips lovingly across the knuckles, "Yeah...I know."
Sasuke smiled, "Good...so then, what's today?"
The poor blonde got tackled to the bed.
"Right, time to finish what you started."
hahaha, omg, poor naruto. I abuse them so. so any who, I was saying that me and my friends make these jokes about raping each other "but it's illegal" but then me or one of them say, "but it's not illegal on days that end in Y" so then it's never illegal! yay! but no seriously, rape is a serious crime, don't do it, unless the other person wants it...like in naruto's case...then have fun! okay, I'm done scaring you guys, review plz!