Labyrinth II- God Save the Queen

DISCLAIMER: I own neither Labyrinth, or Kim Possible.

"Ron... What is this?" Kim asked.

"This," he replied, "is the Labyrinth from the book."

"It's... real?" Kim said in disbelief.

"Apparently," Ron said, "Apparently the girl likes me, because she used the same gift her predecessor tried to give her."

"Must be your animal magnetism," Kim said sarcastically.

"Well, if she's following the plot, we need to find the entrance," Ron said, "and befriend a small creature... Hogwart, I think."

"That's Hoggle!" a voice came from behind them.

Ron and Kim turned around. A brown skinned dwarf-like creature was behind them, sitting on a tree stump.
"What is that?" Kim said.

"I'm not a that, I'm a HE!" Hoggle corrected angrily.

"Kim," Ron said, "if I'm not mistaken, that's Hoggle, one of the creatures who befriended Sarah."

"Well, maybe he can help us," Kim suggested.

"No!" Hoggle said, "Hoggle ain't helping nobody! Hoggle has learned from last time!"

"You mean when you helped Sarah?" Ron said.

"How do you know Sarah?" Hoggle asked, eying him suspiciously.

"She's holding my sister hostage," Ron said, not wanting to mention the book.

"Good luck with that!" Hoggle said, "Even if you win, you lose!"

"How do you figure that?" Kim asked.

"Scenario 1- You get to the castle. You rescue your sister. When she dies, she leaves you as next in line for the throne," Hoggle began, "Scenario 2- She succeeds in seducing you. You're the king, and your sister's a goblin. Scenario 3- You die in one of the Labyrinth's traps. I'd hope for 3, myself."

"Well, we're going anyway," Ron said.

Hoggle felt a slight pang of conscience.

"Well," he said, "I guess it can't hurt. I will help."

"Where's the entrance to the Labyrinth?" Ron asked.

"Follow me," Hoggle said, and led them to a large stone entryway.

Ron looked left and right. The maze went straight in both directions, for a seemingly infinite distance.

"This is no labyrinth," Kim said, "there aren't any turns."

"That's the kind of thinking that'll cripple you in here, Kim," Ron said, "Here, all is possible, and nothing is what it seems."

Meanwhile, in the Goblin Castle...

Sarah held Hana.

"I think I'll call her Sarah," she said, "she's got my nose."

"Ma'am," one of the goblins said, "I believe your following Jareth a bit too closely."

"QUIET!" Sarah snapped, "I'm ten times the ruler he ever was."

She contemplated her life to this point. She partly regretted not going along with him. Thinking back, he was quite a looker, although his face reminded her of someone she couldn't quite place.

Meanwhile, in a Hana's room in Middleton...

Wade stood and looked around. The chip he'd placed in Ron had stopped transmitting in that room, and he had an idea of why, looking out the window. He decided to try to reach Kim. He dialed up the Kimmunicator.

In the labyrinth...


Kim pulled the Kimmunicator out of her pocket.

"Kim," Wade said, "what's going on?"

"I doubt you'd believe me if I told you," Kim said.

"Try me. I'm overlooking a large fantasy landscape out of Ron's house," Wade replied, "I don't think it gets weirder."

"Ron was reading a story called Labyrinth to his sister, he said an incantation from the book, summoning the 'Goblin King'. We got the queen, the book's heroine, as the king had died. She kidnapped Hana, and tried to seduce Ron into becoming the new king. Now, we're in the middle of a labyrinth, looking for the Castle in the center within 13 hours, accompanied by a person called Hobble," Kim explained.

"That's HOGGLE! HOG-GLE!" Hoggle shouted, "is it that hard to remember?"

"Wow," Wade said, "that explains why Ron's chip wouldn't transmit more than 100 yards from his house.

"'Allo!" said a small voice.

"Sorry, Wade. Gotta go. Some worm wants to talk to us." Kim said, cutting the line.

Wade debated going in, but decided he was better as advice.

"Hello," Ron said, "is there a way out of this?"

"Oh, there's plenty o ways out," the worm said, "finding one that works is the trick."

"Where?" Kim asked.

"There, for example," the worm said, pointing to a wall.

"But it's a solid wall!" Kim said.

"Oh really? Try touching it," the worm said.

Kim touched the wall. It rippled. She walked through.

"Thanks," Ron said to the worm, following Kim through.