Disclaimer: I do not own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or "Hey Diddle Diddle." I believe, though am not sure, that I own "Hey Dizzle Dizzle."
Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. The little dog laughed, to see such sport, and the dish ran away with the spoon.


"Check it out check it out! Check it out check it out ! OH Hey dizzle dizzle, the kizzle and the fid-izzle, the co-wizzle jumpeazied over the mizzle. The little…the little um, oh wait I remember….the little diggle lizzed, to see such sport, and the disheazy ran awizzle with the spizzle. Yea, yea!"

Mikey sat back against the couch and nodded, pleased with himself for single-handedly transforming a beloved nursery rhyme into something so modern and resembling of some of the greatest rap songs of his lifetime.

'It's sure to become a hit!' he thought as he lounged lazily, 'Because hey, it came from the great and fabulous mind of the one and only Hamato Michaelangelo, the best looking teenage mutant ninja turtle in the galaxy!'

"Man I am a boss!" the ever so impressionable Mikey muttered excitedly to himself as he sprang from his resting place. "Hey Dizzle Dizzle simply must be shared with the world. It would be, like, an injustice or something if I didn't share my creative genius! To the computer! And, more specifically, my blog, The Life of an Orange Nunchaku Ninja with Three Brothers of Various Colors." Mikey wiggled his non-existant eyebrows. "Four thousand hits a day! What can I say, the ladies love an Orange Nunchaku Ninja…and his three brothers of various colors I guess, but I can't see why…."

"Do you know who the ladies also love, my son?"

Mikey jumped and spun to face the new arrival. "Sensei! What? Love? Sensei, you dog you, have you been keeping a secret relationship with a significant other from us?" Mikey tried desperately to change the subject. Fortunately, it worked.

"No no, my son." Splinter chuckled. "It is nothing of that nature. It is Trent on Days of Our Spies that is keeping a relationship from his long time girlfriend Janice, who although she is a brilliant Spy Agent, has failed to see that Trent has been replaced by his evil look alike cousin Damien, who is not actually evil, but is really Trent's misunderstood-separated-at-birth twin. In today's episode of Days of Our Spies Janice discovers that, unlike Trent, Damien does not have a third nipple. Damien will tell her that he had it surgically removed and did not wish for her to know because he believed that she liked the oddity, but his excuse will not be enough, and Janice will be one step closer to the terrible truth!"

"Um…wow Sensei that's really…really cool! Sounds like that TV Guide that April got for you was really worth it!" Michaelangelo laughed nervously. "In fact, the episode sounds like it's going to be a sure fire hit!"

Splinter smiled knowingly. "A hit much like that of your 'modern' nursery rhyme?"

Mikey blanched. "It's not what you think Sensei, I don't really have a blog! Honest! I meant…I meant that I was gonna go perform it for Donny!"

"Yes, my son, but your brother has been up all night attempting to improve upon our new home's security system, and I have heard that he has barely made any progress. Thus, I do not think that performing your improved version of a classic nursery rhyme would be appreciated at this time."

"Of course Sensei." The orange masked turtle said, bowing his head as he silently thanked his lucky starts that Splinter had not pressed the matter. "I guess I'll just go to my room then. Have fun with Trent, and Damien, and that Janice lady."

"Wait my son."

Mikey turned to face his Master, gulping. He knew he had gotten away too easily.

"Yes Master Splinter?" Mikey asked nervously.

"I believe that you have not changed all the words to your song into the proper Hip-Hop Rap style. For instance, I highly doubt that 'little dog laughed' would become 'little diggle lizzled.'"

"Y-ya know what Sensei, your probably right." Mike sputtered. "I think that I'll just go to my room and fix it up. Improve it, if you will."

"Now my son, there is no need to leave the television area. Damien on Day of Our Spies is quite fluent in the Hip-Hop Rap language, and will be a more then capable tutor for you."

"Say what?!"

"Oh trust me my son, Damien is a very good Sensei." Splinter assured his youngest. "Very, very good indeed."

"And I suppose he taught you something Sensei? Something about love perhaps?" Mikey asked teasingly."

"Yes he most certaintly did teach me something."

"…Are you sure? 'Cause I find that really hard to believe."

"Yea dawg, it's fo' rizzle my nizzle. Fo' shizzle." Splinter replied with ease.


Yup, this is what happens when I lay in bed at night, unable to sleep. I wasn't even thinking of nursery rhymes. This just sorta happened. Of course, it could have been the ice cream and popcorn combination. I may never know. ANYWAY, if you have any thoughts on the previous matter, or on the story! (hint hint nudge nudge) leave a review after the beep!

BEEP!