Mr. Monk, the Lucky Man, Part II
ILLUMINATION
Julie was beaming and Natalie noticed. The three sat on the front porch in the brisk night air and talked about the father-daughter dance. Julie's enthusiasm was relentless and filled both Natalie and Monk with a great deal of content. Julie relived the marble triumph and let Monk tell about the miscounting and subsequent—and no doubt heroic—recounting.
It was, as Monk observed, a very domestic moment the three were sharing. He liked it very much, and by the way Natalie smiled he figured she liked it just as well.
"Julieeeeee!" an anxious soprano voice rang through the night air.
They abruptly stopped talking and looked down the sidewalk. Kelly was darting toward them.
"Julie," she said reaching the porch, out of breath, "don't you ever answer the phone?"
"What's wrong Kelly?" Natalie asked.
"I need to talk to Julie about highly important matters," Kelly reported. She then turned to Julie, "get your things; you are spending the night at my house."
"What are you talking about?" Julie asked.
"I have big news about Todd Jay," with that the two gave a little squeal.
"Mom?" Julie turned to Natalie, "can I please spend the night at Kelly's?"
"If it is okay with her mom and dad."
Kelly jumped in, "yes, it's fine."
"Okay, I guess."
"Julie," Kelly said, "get your things and meet me at my house. And hurry!" Kelly then darted down the sidewalk to her house as Julie ran to get her things.
Monk and Natalie sat on the front porch a bit bewildered.
"That girl, Kelly, is like a tornado," Monk finally said.
"Yep."
Monk ran a hand down the white tie he was still wearing, "Who's Todd Jay?"
"The cutest guy in school," Natalie said in a high pitched, rhythmic voice, doing her best to imitate a teenage girl.
"Oh," Monk said.
Natalie smiled, "if you continue to hang out around here, you'll know all of the high school gossip."
Julie opened the front door and joined them on the porch, "okay mom, I have my stuff, see you later."
"Wait, I'll walk you," Natalie said as she stood.
"It's just a few houses down."
"I'll walk you."
Julie set her bag down, and ran over to Monk. She embraced him in the biggest, most sincere hug she had. He hugged her back.
She whispered in his ear, "Thank you for tonight. And by the way, I approve." She kissed him on the cheek and was off.
Natalie smiled, "I'll be right back."
Monk watched them walk down the street to Kelly's house.
I approve, those simple words rotated in Monk's mind. "She approves," he whispered to himself.
Soon, Natalie was headed back to the house. Monk watched her every move as she walked down the sidewalk at an easy pace. The length of her stride, her flowing blond hair, gently swinging arms, strong and delicate frame: all of her body & soul was magical.
Natalie climbed the steps to the porch and stood in front of Monk who was sitting on the porch swing. He smiled up at her and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her close enough to him so that he could rest his cheek against her stomach. She was warm.
Natalie stroked his hair.
"She likes me," Monk said finally, his head still against her body.
"Julie loves you."
"I felt like a father tonight, at least I think I did."
Natalie laughed slightly. Monk could feel her stomach contracting under his cheek. "Did you like the feeling of being a father?" Natalie asked.
"I loved it."
Monk placed one hand on her stomach next to his face, just under her right breast. He let his fingers move gingerly down her body, over her nearly flat stomach, down the front of her hip, and along her right leg to end just before her knee.
He did it so slowly and unconsciously that Natalie was fascinated, if not a bit shocked. She could feel his every loving touch through her clothing. It was as if he was solving some confounding puzzle. When he stopped, Natalie realized she was a bit out of breath.
She sat down next to him and took his hand in hers. At that moment, she felt for him a warmth and a love that could not be verbalized. Natalie knew that Adrian cared for her daughter a great deal, and for a mother there can be nothing to outshine that. Love was always something Natalie hoped to find again, but more than that, she hoped for a father figure to love and care for Julie, her daughter deserved it.
With a little squeeze of the hand, Monk brought Natalie out of her thoughts. She turned her head and they exchanged lingering smiles.
Natalie looked deep into his eyes, diving into his soul, "I'm falling in love with you."
Monk had no reservations, "I've loved you for so long."
She pressed her lips against his, and in love, the kiss seemed so much more meaningful. On the front porch, they continued like this for some time. For Natalie, being close to him was exhilarating and agonizing; it was as if no matter how close she was to him, she would always long to be closer. But for the first time, she felt as if he would always meet her halfway.
"I want you," Natalie finally said.
"You have me," he whispered.
"No," Natalie took his face in her hands, she hesitated, "I want to make love with you."
He was silent.
"When you're ready," Natalie reassured him, with glowing eyes.
Monk's eyes darted to the ground, and his chest expanded and contracted with a noticeable deliberants. Drawing her to him, Monk kissed her on the cheek and softly said in her ear, "I'm ready."
She looked at him questioningly.
Monk slowly took her hand, entangling his fingers with hers, and led her carefully into the house.
In the entry way Natalie stopped him, "are you sure? Now?"
He smiled timidly and reassuringly all at once, "I think so."
Into her room, they closed the door behind them. It was dark, but still enough soft light to see. He nuzzled her face as they stood next to her bed, his heart racing.
"Natalie," he whispered as she lightly kissed him on the neck. "I haven't done this in a long time."
"That's perfectly okay, neither have I."
"Not since Trudy. She was the only one."
She stopped and realized how big a step this would be for him. "You waited until marriage."
"No." he smiled, "she was just my first, and only."
Natalie rubbed his shoulders and brought her hands to his collar. Removing Mitch's white tie, she held it in her hand and traced her fingers across its smooth surface. Though Mitch was not her first or last, she knew making love with Monk would still be a big step. The only time she had ever looked at a man and felt he was her future was when she looked at Mitch; now Natalie felt that way with Adrian Monk. Her gaze traveled from Mitch's tie to Adrian's eyes and she knew he would be giving a very important part of himself to her. It would be as important as what she is ready to give to him.
"The last thing I want is for us to rush into anything," Natalie said.
He brushed back the hair on her forehead and kissed the very center, "Thank you." He took her hand and placed it on his chest, over his heart, and said, "I want you to be my last."
It took a moment for her to process his words, "what?"
"I love you—and I'm trilled that I know that. Natalie, I want you to be the last person I make love to."
"I love you," she could barely get out the words before his lips were pressed to hers.
Slowly and nervously they unclothed in the safety of a poorly lit room and brought their exposed bodies together; he could feel the weight of her body relying on the strength of his. It was like breathing after being under water for too long, the first few breaths are inconsistent and hurt, but the desperate relief of gaining oxygen is wonderful. For Monk, Natalie had become his oxygen, but it was Natalie who never realized how long she had been under water.
Still standing next to her bed, they held each other desperately. It was a desperation neither knew existed, for so long they each lived with memories of how wonderful love could be, and how badly they needed it. He could feel the healing in her fingertips and the kindness of her touch as she stroked his exposed back. She rested her head on his chest affectionately, enveloped in a masculine embrace.
They made their way into her bed. Gently kissing and caressing, they each had apprehensions but with each touch, any doubt drifted away. Finally, they made slow and silent love, their eyes locked in a continuous gaze.
When they were done, they rested facing each other, holding each other. It was quiet for quite some time, they were overwhelmingly content. She ran her hands through his hair and over his chest, "that was beautiful," she said finally.
"It was beautiful."
The comforting silence lulled them into a dream like state; she soon looked over, fighting a shroud of exhaustion, to find Monk was asleep. Natalie noticed how charming he looked, like a little boy disguised in a man's body. He was innocent, and had the kind of pure heart men don't take with them to middle age, yet he managed to keep his. He would take care of her, and she knew this. She knew better than just about anyone that once he loved, it was forever, obsessively so. The sound of light rain entered her scenes; she pulled the covers closer to her chin as she moved closer to his body, tucking her face next to his. She liked how well he fit in her bed, and fit with her; she tried to memorize and absorb everything about that moment. As the rain and warm bed persuaded her to sleep, she fantasized about how pleasant it would be to wake up in his arms.
Hours later, Monk awoke to the sound of rain dancing on the roof, it was rhythmic and reassuring. He looked to the window, but couldn't see out. Though the curtains were tightly drawn and the room was still fairly dark, the soft morning light filtered in through the window. It amazed Monk how hard that light had to work to get into that room, but some light was able to make it. Passing through layers of atmosphere, thick rain clouds, and a normal San Francisco fog, the beams of light were able to finally seep through her window and illuminate her face.
Her face was all that was exposed to the cool room. Lying next to Natalie, Monk could feel her sleep-warm body radiating beneath the sheets. He was in love. His arm moved a fraction of an inch so that their arms would touch.
With that touch, a sleeping Natalie rolled over and curled up next to Monk's body, draping her arm over his bare stomach and her head nestled nicely against his chest. He held her gently as the rain fell and the light weaved in.
The hard-working morning light was how Monk felt. He has always been bright and always will be, but there has been so many obstacles to fight through, always a rain cloud. Yet there he was, with her, fighting, and succeeding, to be the light that illuminates her face.
The thought of getting up and making her breakfast toyed in Monk's mind, but he soon dismissed it because that would mean leaving Natalie's side—even for a moment, it was a distressing thought. So he lied there, letting her body keep him warm.