Last chapter D:
God, this was so fun to write. And all my reviewers, you guys are all friggen amazing. :D
I think you'll all find the ending amusing, in your way. xD
Warning: Lots of OOC-ness in this chapter. :)
DO. NOT. OWN.
The week was up. Each member had gotten their date. Now it was just time for the decision.
"Itachi is super sexy...but so is Sasori...gah." Tsuki sat on her bed, reviewing each date in her head. They had all gone well, except for a few mishaps. She hadn't thought about it until now, and was now a little scatterbrained. Tsuki was trying to pick someone based on their personality, but it was pretty hard. All of them were hot in their own way. Even if they were man-plants, sharks, were puppets, or ate peoples' hearts.
"Definately not Hidan...he'd make perfrom rituals with him, not just watch him...and Deidara and I are just too much alike...Itachi doesn't seem like the party type...Kisame's in love with a dolphin..." She sighed. This was harder than she had thought. If she picked one of them, then the rest were subject to hate her..."Maybe I should just tell them I love them all too much to decide? Nah. They wouldn't believe that bullshit."
She sat, comtemplating this thought, hoping that the guys were busy entertaining themselves. This was going to take awhile.
Sasori sat in the kitchen, which just happened to be close to Tsuki's room. He sighed. Chasing a girl...is this really what I've been demeaned to? Sasori didn't even know what he was doing in the kitchen anyway. He was a puppet, and couldn't eat. So he just sat at the wood table. And sat. And sat. "Danna, what are you doing, un?" Sasori looked up. "Sitting." Deidara sat down opposite to him, smirking. "In other words, waiting for Tsuki to tell you all that she picks me, right, un?" The puppet shook his head. "You're much too cocky, Deidara. There's not a chance in hell she'd choose you over me." As far as Sasori was concerned, he was the hottest member of the Akatsuki, minus Itachi.
Deidara put his hands on his hips. "Oh really Sasori-danna? And why would she pick an emotionless, wood-ish puppet like yourself, un?" Sasori stood up, walking over to Deidara. "And what makes you think she'd want a moronic, egotistic, girly man like yourself?" They were about to beat the living shit out of each other, but Itachi just happened to be walking by, and broke them up. "You two are idiots. I was voted most sexy at the Mangent last year, remember?" Oh, what a sight that would have been. Sasori glared at the Uchiha. "I was a very close second." Itachi smirked. "Second. Not first. Second. Your 'package' just couldn't stand up to mine, I guess. After all, it is wooden."
Sasori lunged at Itachi, making a lot of noise as he did so. The rest of the Akatsuki slowly walked in, wanting to see the fight between the two. "What the fuck are you two fighting about now?" Hidan was covered in blood, having just come back from a ritual.
"Oh, were just arguing about who Tsuki picks, un. But it's pointless. She's obviously picking me, un."
"Please, Deidara. You look too much like a girl anyway. She'd be afraid to go out in public with you." "You'd make people label her as a lesbian. Which she obviously doesn't deserve, Blondie."
"Besides, having a threesome with Polly would be amazing!" Kisame had a...unique...glint in his eye.
"No! Making love in money! That would win her over!"
"Nuh-uh! We could explode the world, un!"
"Or...I could just eat her..."
"Fuck you all! She's coming with me and Lord Jashin-sama!"
They all jumped in at once, ready to beat the crap out of each other.
"What the hell are they all doing?" Tsuki was awoken from a short nap, after still not having come to a desicion.
She sighed. "May as well go and stop those idiots from killing each other..."
Opening the door, she quietly made her way to the kitchen. What she saw would have mentally scarred just about anyone.
"You guys are all gay, aren't you? I knew it..." She stood against the door, watching the scene in front of her. Everyone was on top of everyone else, and they were shouting, and...just, well, emitting that 'seven man sex' vibe.
Faster than she could blink, they were all around her. "Of course we're not! We were fighting over who you were going to choose! So, who is it? Have you decided?"
They all formed a circle around her, staring straight at her. "Well...uh..."
"Come on Tsuki, un! We really need to know! If we don't I think we'll end up killing each other, un!"
Damn. I'll have to choose now...damn. She looked around, hoping for something to save her.
Just then, Tobi, Tobi of all people, walked into the kitchen. "What's going on? Did Tobi miss a meeting?!"
Tsuki pointed to Tobi. "Tobi! I...I pick Tobi! Yeah! Tobi!"
"TOBI?!" The whole headquarters shook. "What the hell do you mean 'Tobi?'"
"D-don't get me wrong. You're all great. Just so god damn annoying and jealous. And, Tobi was the only one who has yet to annoy me." She walked over to Tobi. "Tobi, come to my room later, kay?" She smiled, waved, and walked off.
Tobi just stood there. "...Is Tobi a good boy now?"
The rest of them just stood there for a moment, before Itachi stepped up. "Tobi...start running."
END. Hope you enjoyed it. :3