Denigoddess@aol.com
07/18/01

Nights In White Satin
(The Pen Is Mightier Series)

DISCLAIMER: GARGOYLES DON'T BELONG TO ME. THEY BELONG TO DISNEY. THE LYRICS TO NIGHTS IN WHITE SATIN DON'T BELONG TO ME EITHER. PLEASE DO NOT SUE. NO INFRINGEMENT INTENDED.


Nights In White Satin
Artist: Moody Blues

Nights in white satin, never reaching the end,
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I'd always missed, with these eyes before,
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.

'Cause I love you, yes I love you, oh how I love you.

Gazing at people, some hand in hand,
Just what I'm going through, they can't understand.
Some try to tell me, thoughts they cannot defend,
Just what you want to be, you will be in the end.

And I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.

Nights in white satin, never reaching the end,
Letters I've written, never meaning to send.
Beauty I'd always missed, with these eyes before,
Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore.

'Cause I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.

'Cause I love you, yes I love you,
Oh how I love you, oh how I love you.


"My Dearest Elisa,"

Goliath growled in frustration as he stared at the blank stationary on the desk in front of him. Temptation challenged him to take the blank page in front of him and crumple it a wad of unwritten dreams. His tail lashed to and fro with dissatisfaction as the words he longed to write his Elisa failed him.

He looked again at the white page as an enemy to be conquered. [Too many nights pass when she comes to visit and I find excuses to be elsewhere. Too many times have occurred when I want to speak of our feelings and she refuses to hear me.]

He refused to give quarter to a single page of stationary.

"My Dearest Elisa,

We share a closeness of friendship that I cherish beyond words. The clan loves you dearly. You are one of our own. We have fought many battles together these past three years and have seen many things. Yet, now words fail me as I attempt to pen them upon this page."

It was a start. Every word written represented absolute truth. Still it seemed a facade to speak of Elisa's regard by the clan when the letter was meant for something different. Goliath considered throwing the page into the wastepaper basket. He steepled his large hands and rested his chin upon them as he stared at the blank page.

He picked up the pen and put it to paper.

"It pains me deeply that we find discomfort in speaking to one another about this growing affection between us. My tongue becomes granite when I am around you these days. I can think of no one that has that effect upon me except you."

"Elisa, you are dear to the clan. You are dear to my heart. I was surprised by your kiss that wonderful morning not so long ago. I want to talk with you about this wonderful affection growing between us. I'd want to see what it might become."

Goliath stared at the script flowing intricately on the white parchment. He read each sentence twice to make certain it stated his thoughts clearly and concisely. Elisa was a woman of secrets and privacy. She wasn't one for gaudy, dramatic displays of affection. [I have faith in you that this letter won't drive you away. I have faith in your ...feelings for me, Elisa Maza.]

Goliath's hand trembled as he once again picked up the fountain pen. He hated ink pens. Beauty was lost when words were scribbled like chicken scratch. His words that he longed to tell Elisa had to be as breathtaking as what she inspired in his heart.

"My heart has always known that you were special. Yet, my eyes saw the loveliness of your heart; it's loyalty and integrity. I will admit, I never considered your physical beauty until the night of Puck and the mirror. With your wings and delicate talons, I saw a stunning Gargoyle before me. That night, something reawakened in my heart that had been asleep for a very long time."

[Am I telling her too much? Am I rambling?] The anxious thoughts darted across Goliath's mind.

"Now, when I'm with you I see beauty in whatever form you may be. I see the beauty of your friendship. I find splendor in that one brief kiss we shared. I knew bliss with you in my arms. Now, I find that I don't want that kiss to stop or that embrace to end."

"Is it the Gargoyle way to love more than once in a life? Is it the Gargoyle Way to feel depths of emotion when one name is mentioned? Whenever I hear your name, my heart bursts with something that slowly grew into a vast creation of devotion, affection, and attraction. The truth is that I just don't know exactly when or where it came about. I only know the truth is that I love you."

Goliath read those last three words. Where had they come from? He only wanted to tell her that he felt something of romantic nature for them. He wanted her to know that his feelings for her moved beyond the realm of friendship. It never occurred to him that he loved her until that singular pristine moment of revelation. He added the final lines "The Gargoyle that loves you, Goliath."

He neatly and carefully folded the letter into three sections and sealed it in an envelope. He wrote her name on the front and sat it on the desk. A simple letter said so much and yet, he wanted something more to go with it. He nodded briefly to Hudson as he went to the edge of the tower. He traveled to a floral shop nearby that he knew to be "Gargoyle-friendly."

He saw what he wanted in the window. With his large talons he rapped lightly on the back door. The cashier seemed rather startled by the late-night intrusion, but opened the door. Goliath knew the flower of choice to give his Elisa. With money he had saved with for just such an occasion, he bought the single lavender rose. He returned to the castle and took his sealed letter in hand.

He headed for Elisa's apartment. Goliath knew that she was at work and he could leave the letter uninterrupted. He opened the large window on the roof and let himself into her humble abode. Goliath pressed a single kiss to the name on the front of the envelope. He placed the letter and the rose on her coffee table.

[Do I wait? No, that would cause her undue comfort. I know that she will not leave this unaddressed. I have faith in you, Elisa. Please, come to me and talk about this.]

That final thought filled the lavender leviathan's mind as he left her apartment. He glided effortlessly through the night air back to the castle. He saw that sunrise neared. He joined the others just as they assumed their poses to greet the day. He knew that he would dream sweet dreams of Elisa Ann Maza.

"Pushin' it a bit close aren't ye, lad?" His mentor quirked a brow ridge in his direction. Hudson unfurled his wings to their full expanse and drew his short sword. "It's almost dawn."

"I was at Elisa's." He smiled at his friend. Hudson gave a knowing nod to the clan leader. He watched his protégé Goliath crouch with talons curled and fangs bared. His dark wings expanded to their full length and he stared resolutely into the dawn. He felt the stiffening rigor of stone sleep overtake him when the sun rose above the horizon. He saw his friend smile knowingly at him.



Elisa arrived home shortly after nine. Groceries threatened to topple from the bags as she set them unceremoniously on the kitchen counter. Cagney wrapped himself around her ankles and begged with melodious mews to be fed.

"Okay, fella, you win." She sighed and grabbed for the can of Kitty Cuisine. After feeding her felonious feline, she made herself a strong cup of java and sat down in the living room to unwind before getting some sleep.

Elisa scooted a cup coaster closer for her steaming mug of coffee. She saw the envelope and the single lavender rose lying in the center of the coffee table. Perplexed, she picked up the envelope and read her name on the front. The handwriting wasn't familiar. She opened the envelope and read the letter contained.



My Dearest Elisa,

We share a closeness of friendship that I cherish beyond words. You are loved dearly by the clan. You are one of our own. We have fought many battles together these past three years and have seen many things. Yet, now words fail me as I attempt to pen them upon this page.

It pains me deeply that we find discomfort in speaking to one another about this growing affection between us. My tongue becomes granite when I am around you these days. I can think of no one that has that effect upon me except you.

Elisa, you are dear to the clan. You are dear to my heart. I was surprised by your kiss that wonderful morning not so long ago. I want to talk with you about this wonderful affection growing between us. I'd want to see what it might become.

My heart has always known that you were special. Yet, my eyes saw the loveliness of your heart; it's loyalty and integrity. I will admit, I never considered your physical beauty until the night of Puck and the mirror. With your wings and delicate talons, I saw a stunning Gargoyle before me. That night, something reawakened in my heart that had been asleep for a very long time.

Now, when I'm with you I see beauty in whatever form you may be. I see the beauty of your friendship. I find splendor in that one brief kiss we shared. I knew bliss with you in my arms. Now, I find that I don't want that kiss to stop or that embrace to end.

Is it the Gargoyle way to love more than once in a life? Is it the Gargoyle Way to feel depths of emotion when one name is mentioned? Whenever I hear your name, my heart bursts with something that slowly grew into a vast creation of devotion, affection, and attraction. The truth is that I just don't know exactly when or where it came about. I only know the truth is that I love you.

The Gargoyle That Loves You,

Goliath


"Wow." She finally found her tongue. "Big guy, you know have to give a girl a big shock."

[Avalon has changed everything.] She found the courage to admit that much to herself. [I halfway think that Avalon sent us on that trip as much to fix things in the world as to have something grow between us. It helped you forge a bond with your daughter. And well, it made me look at you differently, Goliath.]

She inhaled deeply the floral scent of the lavender rose. It epitomized so much; love and it's hopeful expectations, the affection of Goliath. The simply written letter that touched her heart in ways the spoken word could not. [We've danced around this for several weeks. I just didn't know that it was going to come to ...this.]

[You're a Gargoyle and I'm a human. That's just the way it is. It's like matchmaking a monkey and a lizard. You have an obligation to your clan. I want a normal life someday with a house and kids. How can we have that if we're two different species? You're not awake half the time. I just don't see how it can work.]

She felt the tears of desolation prick her eyelids.

[You always were too romantic and naïve for your own good, Big Guy. Now, what do we do?]

[Yet, I haven't known any man like you. I've never felt more loved and more cherished than when I'm with you. Are you the one I've been looking for?]

Whether she wanted to or not, Elisa knew it was time to face Goliath and have 'the talk.'



The sky was a vibrant mural of hue and brilliance. The darkening skies were alive with shades of rose and violent upon a canvas of amber and gold. Elisa turned her attention to the statues standing on the edge of the tower. She patiently awaited their awakening. She dreaded their awakening. She prayed for it.

Elisa knew to step back as the first fissures within the stone skins appeared. She never grew tired as the shards fell away from the Gargoyle's powerful bodies. Each Gargoyle awoke in turn with Goliath being the last. He leapt from his perch and his dark onyx gaze fixed upon on a warm gaze of cinnamon coffee.

"Elisa, it is good to see you." His smoking baritone sent fissions of pleasure throughout her body. She couldn't resist the urge to enter his welcoming embrace. It felt good to rest her cheek against his massive chest. It was right to wind her arms around his waist and simply stand there in a loving hold of strength and affection.

"Ditto, Big Guy." She murmured softly against his smooth suede skin. She listened to the powerful rhythm of his heartbeat: steadfast and constant. She let her breathing fall into syncopation with the rise and fall of his strapping torso. They stood for several silent moments entwined in their intimate embrace. The stillness of the coming twilight seemed only to add more to the cherished ambiance. Finally courage prompted Elisa to find her voice. "I received your letter and I read it, Goliath."

His body stiffened at her words. If he stiffened with fear or happiness she couldn't discern. Elisa raised her warm brown eyes to meet his perceptive gaze. "We need to talk."

"Yes, we do." He gravely agreed. Goliath led her down the stairs into the lower levels of the castle. They said nothing as they made their way side by side to the library within the walls of Castle Wyvern. They enter Goliath's unspoken sanctuary.

Elisa leaned easily back against a long table and studied the lavender Gargoyle standing stoically with his back to her. His wings were folded about him like a protective shroud. They added an understated regality and dignity to him. She watched his tail twitched in rapid movements. Elisa knew Goliath well enough to know that he was tense.

She heard a growl and a deep sigh come from him. She watched with concern as his shoulders rose and fell. Finally, he turned to face her. His face was set with a grimness that worried her. His eyes were filled with anxiety and his whole persona screamed worry.

"Elisa, I do not know where to begin or what to say." He shrugged helplessly. His wings unfolded and flared a bit of animation to emphasize his words. "I see others around us holding hands and falling in love and I feel a pang of loneliness that causes my heart to ache."

"I know what you mean." She nodded. Her hands found her way into her pockets. Her eyes fell to the floor as embarrassment washed over her. "It's an empty feeling."

"Indeed." Goliath stepped closer to her. Then, he stood only inches from her. His closeness brought with it the scent of leather and cinnamon. His warmth teased her alert senses. A large talon hooked under her chin and lifted Elisa's face so that their eyes met. "Yet, I find the ache vanishes when I think of you to fill the void; only you, Elisa."

"Goliath, we've been friends a long time." She began as she moved away from the towering Gargoyle in front of her. She couldn't face his piercing stare looking into her breaking heart. His love was too much for her to face at that moment. "Since Avalon, I've been feeling things for you along with friendship. But, I don't know if this is right. You have your world and your way and I have mine. How can the two meet? We're not the same species or the same age."

"No, we aren't." His heavy tone of resignation caused tears to fall freely from Elisa's brown eyes. "Yet, how can we deny that our hearts both long to protect? You tell me our differences; yet, you cannot defend them against the truth. What is that truth, Elisa?"

"The truth is Goliath that we can never be more than friends." She cried out as anger and the pain of denial overtook her. "You are a Gargoyle and I'm a human. We can't have kids. We can't have a normal life."

"You are right, Elisa. I can never have a normal life with you." He roared with eyes aflame with white fire. "I can never engage in a mating flight with you. We can never glide side by side under the light of a full moon. I will never know what it will be like to see you with egg. Yet, I know that my heart beats in your name. I know that that your presence in my life is as paramount to my survival as the air I breathe. I know that your love makes me whole. I cannot deny what will never be for us. I can only hope what we will be in the end."

"I never thought of it in those terms." Her words were small and quiet. Goliath strained to her them fall from Elisa's lips.

"No, you didn't." He said harshly. He strode towards her and sat her on the long reading table before him. "Yet, we can have a life if we're willing to forge a new way for us. What is growing between us runs far deeper than simple emotion. My Love, we deserve the right to give this passion between us a chance to grow and deepen. I can no longer deny it. All I am asking, Elisa, is a chance for us to love one another. Will you let me love you? Can you find it in your heart to love me? Can your warrior spirit inspire your heart?"

A life without the clan wouldn't be much of a life. Goliath missing from her existence made it seem barren and bleak. Yet, the sheer audacity of the entire scenario seemed ridiculous. Life without Goliath was Hell. There was no choice. It hurt to love him and not have him. It hurt worse to love him and to lose him.

"I love you, Goliath." She whispered. "Why can't everything be simple?"

"It never is, Elisa." He rested his prominent brow ridge against her forehead. She felt his wings and tail wrap around her in a protective cocoon of cherished adoration. "I can't guarantee simple answers or instant solutions. I can only promise you that I love you with all that is within me. I shall treasure you all the nights of my life. I shall carry thoughts of you into my dreams."

Elisa looked to those full plum lips that hovered millimeters from hers. It would be too easy to captures Goliath in a kiss and wish the world away from them. Nothing came that easily for them. There might be no happy ending. She framed his striking chiseled features in her hands and brought his lips to meet hers.

He tasted of spice and tang. His masculine scent caused giddiness in her that she hadn't known since her teenage years. His promise of fidelity brought everything into a sincere focus. Goliath was a love one didn't throw away. He was a love worth risking everything for. To lose him was worse than never knowing him at all.

With that thought, they became what they wanted to be...part of each other.

-Fin