First and foremost, I want to thank everyone that has written me or reviewed me to let me know how much they enjoyed this fic. After the last chapter, it just seemed that RL began to get hectic thanks to my new job and the muses wanted to take an extended vacation for a while, and being the kind author that I am, I figured that since I put them through so much, it would be a good idea. Unfortunately, they didn't know when to come back, but after a lot of searching I finally found them again. I don't know how long their going to stay, but I hope they stay long enough for me to finish this series sometime this year ^_~
Disclaimer: Don't own Digimon...nuff said.
Back To The Middle 11/12
Reconciliation...Or Something Like It
Feeling as if a heavy burden had been lifted on my chest, I sat down on bench and just spaced out, not wanting to really think too much about what I just did.
Not that I could take it back now or would I want to. I just hope that he understands what I'm trying to say.
Hearing giggling behind me, I turned to look and see a couple of kids playing in the park, just running around and laughing their heads off. Watching them and their carefree attitude I couldn't help but be jealous of them and the images of Takeru, Ken, and I running around in the same way seemed to take over.
Taking a few more minutes to remember happier times, I shook me head and continued to walk back home, hoping that Jun wasn't home so I wouldn't have to explain why I rushed out earlier.
When I put my key in the lock, I hear hurried footsteps and in the next second Jun is opening the door and pulling me in. It doesn't take her long to tell me why she looked so nervous. "Um Dai, you have a visitor."
Toeing off my shoes, I glance up. "Yeah, who?"
Giving me a small push in the direction of the living room, she whispers, "Why don't you go see?"
Shrugging my shoulders, I walk into the living room and immediately I am paralyzed, recognizing the person waiting anxiously on the couch.
Snapping out of it, I could only ask the one thing that came to mind. "What are you doing here?"
Bowing his head for a minute, he looks up and I can see the tears that are barely holding on. "I came to offer my apologies for all that I've done."
Feeling the anger come back full force, I snapped, "Well you can take your apologies and shove it!"
With a tear slipping down his cheek, he reached out to me, snatching his hand back at the last moment, when I glared at him. "Daisuke! Please, just give me a chance to explain! I know that you have given me so many, but all I'm asking is for one more!"
Not wanting to deal with this right now, I turn towards the hall and walk to my room, leaving Ken standing in the middle of the living room. Slamming my door shut, I flopped down on my bed, clenching my fists as hard as I could before I pounded something...or better yet, my former best friend who happens to be sitting in my living room.
A few seconds later, I was not surprised when I heard a knock on the door. Already knowing who it was, I just waited for her to come in. Feeling the bed dip a little bit, I looked up to see Jun giving me a look filled with worry. "Dai, I know that I'm going to regret this, but maybe you should give him a chance."
Rolling over, I muttered, "That's rich coming from you. The same girl that started the "Kick the Chosen Asses' campaign."
Hearing her sigh, I can tell that she is going to leave, but not without a few choice words. "True friends are hard to come by, Daisuke. You know that. If there is even a chance, you can't give up on him."
Hmph!! That's easy for her to say. She wasn't the one who was manipulated and betrayed by her best friend. Then thinking of the sad lump sitting on the couch, I can't help feel angry and sad. Anger at what he did to me, and sadness for what we lost.
Knowing the truth in her words, I turn around and ask her, "Can we ever really be friends? After all that happened?"
Pulling me into a hug, she says, "I don't know the answer to that, but at least you owe it to yourself to see if that can happen. You've never been a quitter Dai, so don't become one now."
"I wish I could hate him," I mutter, pulling away and preparing myself for what was about to happen.
"I know PB, I know, but that never does any good." Wiping away the tears that had slipped past, she bopped me upside the head and told me to get my punk ass up and go talk to the little deranged elf sitting in the next room.
Five minutes later, I open my door and an encouraging wink from Jun, I made my way back into the other room. Seeing Ken sitting on the couch, looking so forlorn instantly transported me to another time when he thought that he had lost another close friend.
Without warning, he got up and flung his arms around my neck, sobbing into my neck. "I'm so sorry Daisuke! It's just that I loved you so much that I couldn't see the consequences-"
"Ken-" I interrupted, fighting desperately to remain in control and not break down as well.
"No! I have to say this," he continued fervently, making me loose what little patience that I had left.
"Ken!" Pushing him away from me, I exploded, "Shut up and listen for a minute!"
Seeing that I finally got through to him, I looked him dead in the eye to let him know that what I wanted to say was vital to what would happen between us from now on. "I'm not going to act like that what you've done hasn't hurt me and that I will just automatically forget it, but I as scary as this sounds, I can almost understand why you went so far. Besides, I miss my friend, but it is going to take a while for us to get back to where we were, if ever."
Nodding sadly, he said slowly, "I understand that and I'm not going to push for anything more. I'm just glad that you are willing to give me another chance, although we both know that I don't deserve it."
Not being able to help myself, I pulled him into a light hug, letting him know that he was wrong. "Everyone deserves a second chance Ken. Even third and fourths."
Looking at me with a sad expression he asks, "So, when are you going to do the same for Takeru?"
Not really appreciating his bluntness at this time, I shot back heatedly, "I don't really think that is any of your business." Taking a deep breath, I looked into contrite violet eyes. Putting a comforting hand on his shoulder, I reassured him, "I'm not trying to be mean Ken, but you have to understand."
With unshed tears, he nods his head slowly, "I do."
Holding back my own, I try to make sure. "Really?"
And with a glimmer of a smile, he answers firmly. "Yes."
So here I am, sitting on the couch, eating greasy chips, waiting to see a particular person to walk through the door.
Like I have been for the past two hours.
"Hey, how are you?" Turning from my vigil, I look to see Hikari sitting next to me, smiling a bit too brightly.
"I'm fine," Noticing her eyebrow raised slightly, I realized there was no use lying. "No. That's a lie. I don't know if I can do this anymore 'Kari-chan. I mean what if this is all a big mistake? What if I'm just holding on to something that doesn't want to be held? What if-"
Pinching my lips shut, she hisses, "Stop it right there, Takaishi! I don't want to hear anymore crap like that out your mouth. Now is not the time for the 'what ifs'. You have to see this through."
Remembering the threats she issued the last time we had this conversation, I couldn't help but smile. "I think you've already made that clear, Kari-chan."
Giving me a small punch on my shoulder, she gave me a small smile back. "Just checking."
We sat in silence for a few minutes, just looking at the others that were waiting for the guest of honor for their own particular reasons. "Are you going to speak to Ken anytime tonight?"
"I'm not making any promises."
Seeing that is all I'm going to say on that subject, she wisely says, "I guess that is all I can ask for, ne? Just don't go out of your way to antagonize him, please?"
"I'll play nice...for you."
"Domo. Well, got to play the good hostess. By the way, don't frown so much or you'll get wrinkles."
Smirking, I reply, "Thanks for the tip, Ms. Shishiedo."
"Anytime." And with a blown kiss in my direction, she becomes the little social butterfly that everyone knows and adores.
Sitting on the edge of the couch, I make sure that the spot gave me the vantage point of seeing all the action, especially the people arriving through the door,
And there stood the one person that has been keeping me in the same spot for over an hour. I watched as Hikari greeted him with a hug, and surprisingly he hugged her back. Then I felt that familiar ping I always did when our eyes met. Stepping away from her, he continued to say hi to everyone and it seemed like forever before he was standing in front of me. I knew that the others were waiting to see what was going to happen between us, but I didn't feel like being on display at the moment. And it seemed that Daisuke felt the same because the next thing I know he leans down and asks softly, "Um Takeru, could I talk to you," then looking around pointedly at all the interested faces looking in our direction, he adds, "in private?"
Feeling like a soldier going to the front line, I remained calm. "Sure." Not bothering to ask, we both walk to Hikari's room and close the door, letting the semi-darkness surround us.
"First, I just wanted to say thank you for standing beside me. Jun told me what happened at Yamato's."
"You don't have to thank me for that Dai. Hell, it's something that I should have done before."
Completely confused, I can't help but ask, "Don't what?"
Sitting down on computer chair, he looks out the glass windows of the balcony, staring into the night sky. "I really don't want to talk about the past right now."
Wincing at his biting tone, I couldn't help but wonder if this talk would end up like the ones we've had so far since I've been back. "Sorry to bring it up."
Giving me a small smile of apology, he explains, "I know that we will have to talk about it sometime, but that is something that I don't want to do right now."
After few minutes, he asks softly, "Did you get my package?"
Relieved that he had brought the subject up, I replied in the same manner. "Yeah," Walking over to the chair he was sitting in, I kneeled down on the floor so I could look up into those expressive eyes that told so much. "Do you really feel this way?"
"Yes, I do, but..."
"I should have seen that coming," I laughed, to cover up the aching disappointment I felt.
"But, you do know that it is going to take some time to get back to the way that we were or that we may never be the same, ne?"
"I would be stupid to think that it hasn't." And my heart hurt to admit that it would most likely happen.
Giving me a small grin, he put a finger on my chin, lifting it until my eyes met his. "Take, even though I love you, and I do love you, I have to learn to trust you again. Please try to understand. We can't have one without the other," and those are the words from the Daisuke the Wise and I said as much.
Still looking at me with those warm browns he gave me a wistful smile. "We all have to grow up sometime."
Lowering my head a bit, I kissed the finger on my chin and breathed in the spicy smell that I had missed so much. "Daisuke..."
"Takeru," he began, but I couldn't hold in what I wanted to say to him for so long.
"I love you. You know that, right?"
Getting out of the chair, he kneeled next to me on the floor, our knees touching.
"I know that now."
Leaning forward, I whispered, "And I'll always love you, you know that as well?"
With a full out smile on his beautiful tanned face, he leans forward this time our faces getting closer. "I sincerely hope so."
"I don't think that you have to worry about that. Besides, I am the Bearer of Hope after all," and with a few last few inches, I closed the gap between our face and touched my lips to his, my heart flaring with recognition and happiness at tasting what it had craved for so long.
It was a couple of minutes before we both pulled away, the need for air becoming a necessity. Brushing back the hair that had fallen over my eyes, he said. "I've missed that."
"I've missed that too." Taking my turn to brush his auburn spikes, I ask, "Daisuke, can I ask you a question?"
"What do you want to know?"
"What made you decide to do this now? Not that I'm not complaining or anything," I grin, letting him know that there wasn't any pressure for him to answer.
Looking like he was debating the answer, he finally replied, "Ken came to visit me today."
I guess the surprise on my face was obvious because he just grinned. "Yes, really." His smile fading, he continued, "I know what he did was wrong, and that it is going to take a long time to get to where we were, but I don't want to shut him out. We've been close for too long for me to allow that to happen, you understand?"
Giving him a look of unbelief, I couldn't help but ask heatedly, "How can you consider being his friend after what he's done to you? To all of us?"
Directing a stern look my way, he shot back. "The same way that I can forgive you and our friends for not believing in me and shutting me out. Even though most of this mess is his fault, he was the one that stood by me when none of the Chosen did."
Not being to argue with his logic, I asked hesitantly, "Does that mean you want me to make up with him?"
Shaking his head, he replied, "That is something that you are going to have to do when you're ready, but I want you to know that I am not going to abandon him. I can't." Backing up a bit, he looked at me intently, letting me know that what he was about to say would make or break the progress we've made these past hellish months. Seeming to choose his words carefully, he said, "I know that he hurt you too, and whenever you choose to forgive him is your decision, but I can't turn my back on him, Takeru. I have explained to him that it is going to take a long time for us to get back to where we were, but I that I am willing to try. If you think that is going to be a problem, then maybe we need to figure out exactly what we want with each other.
Feeling somewhat reassured, I shook my head slowly. "There is nothing to figure out. I love you, Daisuke, and even though it's buried deep somewhere, there is a part of me that cares for Ken as well. Hell, I can't help but think if I would have done something similar if you had chosen him first," I admitted, feeling a shiver go down my spine, not wanting to face the truth that I would have done something like that just to call Daisuke mine.
"But you don't have to, because it was you that I chose then...and now." After a few moments, he whispers, "Thanks for not giving me up this time."
Holding him a little tighter, I laughed, "Kari-chan would have killed me if I did!" Seeing his questioning look, I told him of the pep talks that Kari has been giving me throughout this mess.
"Hmm, I guess my 'Nee-chan and Hikari share the same brain then."
"Jun told you not to give up on us?"
"When Ken came over, I didn't know what to say or do and just went to my room hoping to hide from everything, but like clockwork she gave me a verbal kick in the ass and told me that I shouldn't give up on him or any of you because believe it or not, I still considered all of you friends. I hate it when she's right."
Sending a silent thanks to his sister, I make a note to get her something nice.
"I don't. I've missed you so much, Dai."
And when he pulls back, I know right then and there that everything is going to work out.
"I missed you too, Take."
I know that it's wrong to be leaning up against the door, but after everything that's happened, we can't help it...well some more than others.
"What's going on?"
"What are they saying?"
"Do you think this is a good idea? I don't hear anything."
"Well maybe we could if you bunch would shut up!"
Slipping away from the congregation that was slumped outside the bedroom door, I turned to look out the balcony door, and wasn't surprised to see a slumped over form on the railing. I walked out to the balcony, knowing what I had to do.
Putting a hand on the tense shoulder, I asked quietly, "Are you alright?"
Jumping a bit, the younger man in front of me, spun around, giving me a wobbly smile. "I would be lying if I said yes and I think I have done enough of that in this lifetime. However, I will be okay eventually."
Giving me a wary glance, he replied shakily, "Yes?"
Being better with action than with words, I gave him a hug and just held on tight, letting him no that he would never be alone. At first, he just stood in my arms, stiff as a board, but slowly he began to return the gesture.
Feeling a small tap on my back, I turned my head to see my sister giving me a small smile. Nodding her head towards the trembling boy in my arms, she said, "I'll take it from here, 'Nii-chan."
And knowing that she did, I stepped back and let her fill my spot and began to walk towards the door, but before I went in, I turned around and called out, "Ken?"
Waiting for him to look at me, I said, "Remember what I said. You are not alone."
Seeing the expressionless face of my boyfriend, I knew that he saw what happened. Not wasting anytime, I began to talk fast. "Yamato, I can explain."
"There's no need," he said evenly, before pulling me into a long kiss. Pulling back when the need for oxygen became necessary, I could only get out, "Why?"
With a grin, he gave me another kiss on the cheek and whispered in my ear, "You are a good man, Yagami."
And just as I was about to show him what other things I could be good at, there was a loud commotion as bodies fell tangled on Hikari's bedroom floor, while two amused boys stood over the large pile.
Watching as our friends untangled themselves, Daisuke laughed at the twisted pile on the floor. "Umm, can we help you?"
Pushing her hair out of her face, Miyako asked bluntly, "So, are you two back together or what?"
"MIYAKO!" came the collective shout from the rest of the pile.
"Like all of you don't want to know the same thing."
Shaking his head at his friend, Iori turned his attention to the two in the doorway. "But she does pose a good question. Are you?"
Seeing the blushes spread, I decided to step in before it got too nasty. "Guys, I think we've interfered enough. Give them a chance to breathe."
With a grateful smile, Daisuke replied, "Thanks Taichi."
"No problem, Daisuke."
Shaking his head, his smile widens, almost making him look like the boy that looked up to me for so long. "Dai, is just fine."
And at that moment, Hikari walks in with Ken who is now looking a little bit better from a miserable person that was standing on the balcony few minutes ago.
Following his gaze, I see that it lands on the slightly smiling couple standing a few feet away, and with amazement I watch as he moves away from my sister and begins to move in their direction. Feeling the tension grow, I continue to look on as he stands in front of Daisuke and Takeru and wonder if this mission of ours will be a success...
Or blow up in our faces.
To be concluded in...Sourire