Disclaimer: I don't own Tsubasa, but CLAMP really should just take the world over already because the sooner they do, the sooner we'll know everything about Fai and Yuui.

This story was born mostly out of frustration at not completely knowing if Fai is actually Yuui. At the time of this story, I've read the most current installment of the Tsubasa RC comics, Chapter 157. So in the future is things change (which they will more than likely will) this story was just born from reading the end of Chpt. 157. I just had this thought in my head of Kurogane calling Fai his real name (Because right now I totally assume that Fai is really Yuui) and to see 'Fai's' reaction to hearing his real name for the first time in who knows how many years/decades and after a tramatic trip down memory lane with the zombie/illusion of his twin brother. So here it is.

This story takes place after Ashura (And any possible fight they had with him) this is like the lull in the battle and they are resting to absorb everything that just happened. I hope you enjoy.


By: Melissa the Damgel

"Fai?" he called softly, his red eyes flickering as he turned to regard the bundled blonde figure sitting by himself in the corner as far as possible from his other traveling companions and the roaring fire. Kurogane's lips pursed into a thin line before he tossed another shattered chair leg into the large hearth before he ventured cautiously towards Fai's turned back.

"Fai?" Kurogane asked again, but when there was no movement from within the confines of the large hood Fai had pulled over his head, he dared to inch closer. Standing over the prone form that leaned heavily against the wall and with his arms wrapped tightly about his body, Kurogane's lips once more thinned to a line and his eyes narrowed as he regarded the man's hunched shoulders. "Yuui..?"

"Don't call me that. He died a long time ago." Fai snapped instantly at him in a hissed and choked voice. He gripped at his shoulders tightly and bowed his head further, "He died…" Fai whispered and shuddered, allowing his face to twist up in pain, trusting for the moment that Kurogane wouldn't be able to see him with his back to him.

Frowing further, Kurogane took to a knee and reached his hand out to the other man, lightly touching his shoulder, "I don't understand what happened, but it wasn't your fault."

"You don't know anything!" Fai shouted, throwing an arm out behind him and slapping Kurogane's hand from his body. His single blue eye flared in something of a mingled loathing and sorrow. He scrambled to his feet, stumbling clumsily and fighting his sore muscles, and tried to move past the other man.

Standing smoothly, Kurogane continued to glare at the blonde, one hand curling into a fist as the other reached out, grabbing at the mage's elbow. "You're right, I don't know anything! We know nothing of each other because we made damn sure not to talk about our pasts." Kurogane snarled and jerked the man towards him and shoved him back into the corner, stepping in front of him and effectively locking him in place before him. "And you know what, I don't care about your past. I don't give a damn if I ever find out exactly what happened when you were a kid to make you so fucked up. I don't care because that won't change who you are right now."

Fai narrowed his eye, his hands curling into fists slowly. "Move." He ordered through clenched teeth. When Kurogane only raised a brow in mild mockery, Fai shoved at his shoulder and moved to side-step past him.

Slamming his hand against the wall, Kurogane cut off Fai's attempt to slip past him and he shifted his weight to fully block off that side of the wall. "No. I told you we were going to finish this discussion back in that acid rain world. We're going to finish it now."

"Kurogane? Fai?" Shaoran called, sitting up from the make-shift bed that was laid out in front of the fire. The young man stared for a moment, a hint of childish uncertainty washing over him before he sat up a bit straighter, his brows furrowing and his lips growing thin as his trademark determination settled into place. "What's wrong?"

"Go back to sleep." Kurogane growled, seizing Fai by the elbow and turned sharply, dragging the struggling man behind him. "Mommy and Daddy have to talk." He snapped, storming across the room towards the large double doors that had opened into this enormous room.

"Fai?" Shaoran called and stood, unsure if he should trust Kurogane at the moment with the anger clearly written upon his face.

Smiling brilliantly and offering his classic fake laugh, Fai waved a hand at him and gave a small skip even though he knocked a cracked and dusty vase from an end table in his attempts to get away from Kurogane. "Don't worry. Daddy just wants some alone time with Mommy. Isn't he such a romantic?" he squealed with a giggle, turning to show that smile to Kurogane. "Kuro-pipi! I told you to be more discreet!" He laughed gaily and casually slapped at the ninja's shoulder playfully.

"Stop it!" Kurogane snarled, his red eyes flashing, his shoulders set stiff and hard before he yanked Fai out into the hallway and kicked the door shut behind him. Instead of throwing him against the wall like he had fully intended to do before the kid woke up, Kurogane led Fai down the hall, taking several random turns before he felt a comfortable distance had passed between them, the kid, and the currently passed out Mokona.

Letting go of his elbow as he turned sharply around to stare down at the blonde man who had given up trying to fight for his freedom by the third random turn down a hallway, Fai stared back up at him, his remaining eye looking foggy and glazed over as though he was trying to mentally escape his current situation.

"Look at me, Fai."

He lifted his head, but his eye remained distant and stared at his shoulder and chest more than his face.

"Look at me." He hissed and once more reached out, taking his upper arm into his grasp and shaking him gently.

Fai turned his head away completely, his hair falling in front of his eye to hide his face from the man. "Kuro-chan is hurting me." He whispered though he didn't even bother trying to pull away.

"It seems like pain is the only thing you respond too." He snapped and reached out with his other hand to grasp Fai's chin roughly. He forced him to lift his head up and he gave him a small jerk on his arm to bring that beautiful blue eye into focus upon his harsh red ones. "Whatever the hell went on in your past, you need to get over…"

"I killed him!" Fai shouted, his face contorting into pain in the blink of an eye. Moisture colored his eye into a cerulean storm of emotion and his teeth gritted tightly to keep in the sob he felt tickling in his chest. "I killed him! I told the man my name and he killed my brother!" He tried to jerk away from him once he felt Kurogane's hand slacken upon his chin. He managed to turn his face away, but his arm remained within the ninja's iron-like grip. "I killed him. I watched him fall and-"

"I don't care." Kurogane whispered with his voice soft and belying his words. "It happened a long time ago, and it was just an illusion back there. Don't let it affect you."

"But I killed him!" He shouted and shook his head, a few tears flying from his eye. "I killed him… I… I told the man to save me. I told him my name, and he killed my Fai all because I told him my name instead. I was selfish and told him to save me." He trembled, smiling ruefully even though a tear welled at the corner of his eye.

Kurogane lowered his eyes, his brows no longer knitted together in anger, but pain for the willowy man standing in front of him. "Fai…"

"There's nothing you can say that will fix this, Kuro-rin." He looked up to him, that expert smile upon his face, "There's nothing. It's my sin to bare alone." Fai continued to smile sweetly as though nothing was bothering him. "I had just hoped I would have died before now."

Frowning deeply, Kurogane eased his hold upon the man's arm and let his hand drop down to his wrist instead. "Don't say that. I told you…"

"That I have to live until unless I ask you to kill me, right?" He snapped at him, a glare within his stony eye. "Well then do it. Kill me! I don't want to live anymore and I'm tired of waiting for a stronger opponent to kill me. Just end it for me!"

Kurogane snarled and jerked a hand up, grabbing Fai by the back of his hair and jerking his head up to look him in the eyes. "Shut the hell up! I'm not going to kill you now or anytime in the future. Not when you ask me when you're in a mood like that!" He gave him a little shake, pulling him closer. "You wanted to live! Maybe the reason your brother died is because he gave up hope of getting out of there himself. Maybe that bastard that appeared to you had already asked your brother who to save before he asked you –and maybe your brother told him to rescue you! Who knows! It's in the past! You're here and your brother isn't. I know the pain you're feeling for having lost a family member, but you have to get strong. Don't dwell on it and let your mind rot away from the guilt!"

Fai growled, his eye shifting into a brilliant amber with a slit-pupil running down the middle as he tried to pull away from him, even at the cost of chucks of his hair being ripped out by the larger man. "You know nothing! Don't talk like you understand it! I haven't forgiven you yet and this won't make me!"

"I don't understand it, and I don't care!" Kurogane shouted into his face. "But you need to stop living in the past, Yuui!"

His face went pale and he physically shuddered as though he had just been punched in the stomach. "I'm not…"

"Yuui." Kurogane growled again, leaning closer to him, holding his head motionless before his.

"Don't…" Fai whispered, his brows knitting together as he stared into Kurogane's hard eyes.

Staring at him directly, Kurogane allowed a sliver of a moment sift through them and into them, taking hold of their mind and body and stilling their movements to nothing. He gazed down at the terrified face and the blue depths of his soul shattering eye. Kurogane soon found himself loosing himself within that sad expression, watching Fai stare at him in such hope that he wouldn't say it again.


Fai trembled as a sob escaped his throat and he squeezed his eye shut to block out Kuro-tan's gentle, worried face. The man wasn't supposed to look like that. He was Kuro-chan, a strong warrior and mighty ninja. Kurogane wasn't supposed to care! He wasn't supposed to care about him.

Slim hands gripped at Kuro's arms as another tear rolled down his cheek. He felt Fai's nails dig into the sleeves of his coat while he watched the man silently cry.


"Don't! Don't… say my… my name…" Fai hiccupped loudly and tugged harshly on Kurogane's arm. "It's not mine anymore." He whispered under a shattered breath, his face contorting once more as he waited.

Kurogane frowned but leaned closer to him, his lips brushing along the shell of his ear as his breath puffed against his neck, "Yuui."

Slamming a fist into Kurogane's chest suddenly and causing the ninja to release his hold on his hair, Fai beat a fist into Kurogane's chest again and again, growling in his chest like a beast. "I hate you! I won't ever forgive you!" Fai shouted, shoving Kurogane back several steps till the taller man was the one against the wall this time.

Closing his eyes and allowing Fai to beat against him, Kurogane grunted only now and then as the mage's small hands bruised his chest and threw stronger punches as each minute passed. Eventually, Kurogane opened his eyes, watching the mage fight an inner battle before he grabbed for one of his wrists and squeezed it, silently telling him that was enough with a hard look within his red eyes.

Fai's fists curled around the front of his coat, gripping at it tightly as his knees buckled and threatened to give out. "Why… no matter how hard I try to keep you at bay… why do you always find a way through? Can't you just stay away?" He asked, his voice quivering and his body shaking as he fell against him, sliding down to the ground slowly.

Wrapping an arm about his waist, Kurogane shut his eyes once more to the sight as he lifted Fai back up towards his chest. "Yuui…"

Another sob jerked from Fai's throat and he managed to lift a fist to beat at his shoulder, but soon his hand stilled and his arm wound itself around his neck, holding him tightly as he buried his face in his chest. "I hate you…" He whispered.

Kurogane's face tightened as his arms constricted around the lithe mage against him to continue holding him up. "I don't care." He answered back.

Fai curled closer to him, burying himself within the ninja's arms. His occasional sobs ended as the minutes ticked by and Fai's eye opened after a while. He stared down the gloomy, cold, and disused hallway, feeling so out of place yet not wishing to pull away just yet. It was so warm right here.

"Can we go back to how things used to be in the country of Yama? I was happy there – even though I couldn't understand anything." Fai whispered, his fingers tightened in his coat faintly as though afraid he would pull away.

An eyebrow twitched and Kurogane lowered his eyes in confused annoyance down at the blonde head of the mage, "But the soldiers…"

"You always kept me safe without following me around like some bodyguard. Even that one time…" He trailed off. They both knew what that 'one time' was. "… you were just protecting me in the long run." Fai whispered, closing his eye to the moonlit gloom of the decrepit building around them.

Kurogane shifted uncomfortably, turning his head away as though that would make it less embarrassing for him. "Yeah," he grunted. That was all he could manage to say.

Fai lifted his head suddenly, staring at the place where his collarbone would have been visible but for the thick winter coats they were forced to wear in this country. "I want to go back to that time." He stated with a hint of a trembling in his voice.

He scoffed, keeping his eyes focused on a rotten table across the hall. "You're insane."

Laughing abruptly, Fai nodded, "I think I am actually. Who kills their own twin brother? Who murders a country? Who follows around a Big Puppy, a kid, and a… Mokona… looking for someone to kill him."

"I'm not a Big Puppy." He growled, bristling at the return of the old nickname. Kurogane looked back down at the mage, his eyes narrowing at the fake smile that had crawled up his face.

Fai laughed again, slowly uncurling his fingers from the man's coat and he lifted his hand to pat his cheek. "But you are! You're loyal and fierce. That's means you're a Big Puppy!"

"I am not!" Kurogane shouted, his teeth gnashing at the man's trilling giggle. "If you're going to call me names, at least say I'm a wolf or something more ninja-like!" He ordered.

The squeal of laughter that escaped Fai and the look on his face was almost genuine and it caught Kurogane by surprise. His breath caught in his throat and his body stiffened in his attempt to just stare and capture that look upon the lithe man's face.

"Yay! Kuro-chan is playing with me!" The mage threw a hand in the air in celebration, his blue eye opening to stare up at the ninja.

The moment his eye revealed the hidden emotion behind it, Kurogane's heart felt like ice and his stomach flipped. He was getting better with his mask. Reaching up suddenly, Kurogane grabbed his wrist and jerked it up higher, bringing the laughter to a stumbling halt and a very surprised looking Fai gazing up at him.

"You're always hiding behind that stupid grin. Why don't you tell me what you are really thinking?" He hissed, his other hand reaching up to try and unwind Fai's arm from his shoulders.

Lowering his face, Fai stiffened and grasped the man's opposite shoulder tightly, digging his nails into the fabric to keep his arm in place around the ninja's neck. "Kuro-tan always could see past me. That's why I hate you." He whispered.

"I don't care if you hate me. I just want you to be honest with me. What's the use of holding in your emotions if it turns you into a doll?" Kurogane growled, tugging on the man's elbow.

Fai's wrist was eventually let go and the mage lowered his arm slowly, his hand hovering for a moment above Kurogane's shoulder. "Doll, huh? You really think that's what I've become?"

"You're getting damn close, again! When I first met you, that's what you were. A blonde doll. At least back in that chess-fighting world you were feeling something. You weren't hiding anything from me and you were acting how you felt."

A smile twitched at Fai's lips and he lifted his face, gazing up at Kurogane with an amused yet sultry glimmer in his half hooded eye, "Kuro-chan wants me all to himself."

"Idiot." He scowled, his lips curling back in a weak snarl.

Smiling sadly, Fai stared up at him, his hand finally settling upon Kurogane's shoulder and he slid his arm around the taller man's neck, pulling himself up against him more tightly with a nudge of his hips.

"What… Let go." Kurogane stuttered, his hands dropping to his hips to try and push him away before he tugged at his shoulders.

Fai just smiled that sad, wavering flicker once more –and the smile did pause Kurogane's motions. His smile was real this time and it brought a chilled shiver to his spine.

"I told Kuro-sama that I want to go back to the time in Yama. Don't you? I know it's been awhile since you've-"

"Shut up." Kurogane snapped, his red eyes flickering away, his jaw setting in a painful grimace with a soft blush prickling at his cheeks. "We only had to do that so that…"

"But it made me happy." Fai whispered and leaned upwards, moving closer to his face. "It made me feel alive."

Kurogane closed his eyes and turned his head slightly. He felt Fai's fingers slide along his back and up along his neck before his palm settled upon his cheek; so small, yet warm and cool all at once. It was like his touch was an example of what the man was – a contradiction that was so enticing and alluring. Fai forced his head to turn and his lower lip twitched as Fai initiated it; brushing their lips together and pressing their bodies together as he took a step closer.

Fai tugged the ninja's head down gently as he once again nudged their hips together. He nibbled at the larger man's lower lip, tasting him and remembering old tricks as he slipped his tongue past his own lips to trace along the reluctant man's.

Standing still with his hands at his sides, Kurogane squeezed his eyes shut as he felt Fai curl around him. He felt a slender leg inch its way along his thigh to settle at his hip. Kurogane shivered and licked his lips only to be met by Fai's clever tongue delving into his mouth with all the skill and desire of one who had familiarity with the other. He felt the man's tongue map out his mouth as though revisiting a cathedral he had missed worshiping to daily. The feeling was spine tingling, and memories fueled some inner desires.

Fai whimpered faintly and nudged against him, a hand tugging at his hair. "Kurog-"

A growl escaped his throat. Kurogane bit down lightly on the man's questing tongue to stop him from saying it. His large hands grasped the mage's hips and tugged him upwards, his hands squeezing his ass as he gripped him close to his body.

Moaning, Fai lifted his other leg quickly and the moment his back came into violent contact with the wall across the hall, he wound his legs together behind the man's back and gripped at iron-like arms, arching his back when Kurogane delved into his mouth. The two soon were dueling each other with wet and sliding tongues and grunts as fingers began to seek out clasps and buttons.

Fai's hand slithered down between them and he jerked on Kurogane's pants roughly. He managed to free several buttons but the next few were difficult and forced a whine to escape his throat.

Kurogane rumbled deeply in his chest. A hand pressed into his the mage's stomach as he pulled away, yanking roughly on the man's pants, and soon they were tugged halfway down his thighs, forcing Fai to bend his knees up near Kurogane's shoulders.

There were going to be no tender touches or caresses, just rough, demanding fingers and the occasional snarl. Kurogane freed himself from his pants, and with only a quick, saliva slicked jerk of his hand, shoved himself into Fai. He bit down on the lithe man's lower lip to muffle the scream that was ripped from his throat at his rough entrance. Kurogane growled and paused within Fai, taking a moment to just feel him and to absorb the feeling of being surrounded by the man once more in the most intimate of joining after what felt like years of being absent.

Crying out again and panting loudly, Fai trembled and tugged on Kurogane's shoulders as the throbbing pain thumped mildly around the man's cock. "Don't stop." He gasped, his brows knitting together.

Kurogane's grip on Fai's thighs tightened as he pushed into him once more and pressed in deeper till he was sheathed to his balls in the man.

"Yeah, like that, hard…" Fai whispered, his back arching again and pain flooding over his face, but the member between his legs twitched with excitement and stated the enjoy he took in the pain.

Turning his head, Kurogane hid his face against the mage's neck and began to move in fast, hard jerks, grunting softly while Fai gasped and moaned, as loud as always. His lips latched onto his neck, nibbling and suckling on the skin in-between grunts and gentle bites.

The two moved against the other insistently and inadvertently bruised and scratched wildly at the other as they tried to demand more even as their bodies absorbed the sensations and took all they were given, rising high with pleasure and balancing precariously upon the tip before the threshold of mind bending pleasure.

"Kuro-tan!" Fai gasped, his head falling back against the wall with a soft gasping cry. "Kuro-tan!" He cried again, his hips wiggling against the other man's in his attempt to ask for him to move harder; though, with his body folded in half and his knees draped over the other man's arms, it was hard to truly move the way he desired.

Growling, Kurogane lifted his face from the man's neck and the red welt he had been focusing on. "Don't… call… me… that!" He grunted as he shoved into him more roughly with every word to emphasize his point.

The straggled and hoarse cry that escaped Fai stopped Kurogane's movements completely from a volt of shock the cry sent jolting down his spine. Fai whined and tugged at his arms as he stopped, his face contorted as though in pain and his lashes glimmered faintly with tears. "Kuro-chan… no… don't stop… please! I'm going to die…" he sobbed, arching his back and lifting a hand to grasp at the dark hair and tug him forward, pressing the ninja's face against his neck once more.

Closing his eyes, Kurogane continued to stand still against him –though he felt the same, like he was about to die if he didn't finish soon. "Yuui…"

"Don't call me that!" Fai shouted, a sob escaping his chest and ripped its way through the air, surrounding them like a tense blanket of uncertainty.

Lifting his head, Kurogane placed a chaste kiss over the red mark on his neck and began to trail kisses along Fai's neck and over his cheek to his lips.

Fai shook his head, trying to push at the man's chest as another sob tumbled from his lips, "Stop it. I don't want to play anymore, Kuro-sama."

Frowning, Kurogane untangled one arm from under one of the mages long and slender leg and snatched at Fai's wrists and forced them above his head and against the wall. The movement caused the blonde to cry out and shake his head, his leg wrapping about the man's chest though his actions appeared to say he didn't want this.

"I'm not stopping till I'm satisfied." Kurogane whispered.

"Kuro-pipi is so mean." Fai hiccupped and shook against him.

"You make me be mean." He retorted and leaned in close, kissing at his neck before somehow managing to find his lips. Fai cried. He felt the tears sliding down the mage's cheek and brushing against his nose as he kissed him gently and calmly, tasting his lips and brushing against them delicately – like the kiss from a lover. A real one.

Turning his head and gasping for breath, Fai quaked against Kurogane and inhaled sharply as the man moved inside of him once again, "Ahh, Kuro-rin is weird…" He whispered then lost his breath as the man slid into him slowly, causing him to squirm against him.

Kurogane moved slowly and deeply, stroking himself into the man's depths and trying to angle himself comfortably so he could brush against that nub inside of Fai to hear that breathy inhale. "Yuui…"

"No…" Fai whispered then moaned as his body ignited in pleasure as Kurogane found that pleasure nub inside of him.

"Yuui." Kurogane said again, breathing it against his ear and pushing inside of him again to jab at his prostate.

A breathy gasp was all that protested this time, though Fai's face contorted in both pleasure and pain as he heard the name whispered on Kurogane's lips.

Kurogane pressed another chaste kiss to Fai's lips, nibbling lightly on his trembling lower lip before he lifted his head to press his lips through the blonde hair and to the man's skin. "Yuui."

Fai let a wail loose, his hands fighting against Kurogane's larger hand, and when he wasn't able to free himself, he turned his face again and pressed his nose into his raised arm. "Kuro-rin…"

"Yuui." Kurogane insisted once more. He felt Fai's body go limp suddenly and he released the man's slender wrists to wrap his arm about his slim waist.

His arms fell from the wall and quickly draped over Kurogane's shoulders, trying to hug him as close as possible with his legs trapped in his pants and between the man's body as well. "Kuro-kun… again."

Kissing the man's brow and cheeks, his hips picking up speed, Kurogane watched through half-lidded eyes as Fai's gasping and crying softened to occasional soft moans and gasps, his body seeming to become alive all of a sudden with his face easing its tortured look to one stating only pleasure. When 'Yuui' was whispered to him again, a long moan unfurled from his body and he tugged at the man's shoulders, writhing against him.

Panting and shaking from effort and pent up desire, Kurogane's hips moved faster and harder. "Yuui…" He managed between a raspy groan.

Fai shouted suddenly and arched his back, his head thrown back and his hands cradling Kurogane's face tightly between his palms as he released and bucked his hips.

Kurogane groaned, thrusting into the lithe man several more times before his own release was finally forced from him by the tightening muscles of the man's insides and the moan that was drawled next to his ear.

"Kuro-chan…" Fai whispered, growing limp between him and the wall.

Shaking, Kurogane's legs gave out suddenly and he leaned heavily into Fai, using his body to guide his. They slid down the wall till he fell to his knees, cradling the mage upon his lap despite the awkwardness of having the man bent double under him.

Fai continued to tremble, his fingers curling faintly against Kurogane's cheeks as he bowed his head forward, panting for breath.

Shaking slightly, Kurogane pulled out of the man, hearing Fai whimper softly and it made him wince. He tried to gently tug the pants up from his thighs and over his butt. Once he succeeded, he left them hanging precariously from the mage's hips and he lowered the man's remaining leg from his shoulder.

His leg fell to the other side of him and Fai continued to straddle Kurogane's lap. His head fell to the side, his single blue eyes staring blankly at nothing in particular –that is, till he felt Kurogane lean into him, resting his forehead upon his shoulder with his strong arms drawing the smaller man closer to him. Their chests pressed together and he felt the ninja inhale the scent at his neck before nudging at the red mark he had left there earlier.

Smiling weakly, Fai's fingers drifted up along Kurogane's cheeks and they slid into his hair, gripping it lightly at his temples. "Kuro-tan really is a Big Puppy." He whispered, his voice cracking.

"Shut up, Yuui." Kurogane growled.

Fai's face twitched in pain and he closed his eye and began to shake against him.


"Don't call me that." He whispered hoarsely. "Yuui died. Fai was supposed to live." He explained suddenly, his fingers tightening a bit more in the man's dark hair.

Frowning deeply, Kurogane lifted a hand from the mage's waist and he laid it against the man's cheek, gently forcing him to turn his head and look at him. "Taking his name won't change the fact he's gone."


"And he can't live through you." Kurogane cut him off, his red eyes sharp and firm. "Only you can live for yourself in that body."

Fai's eye colored deeply as another a wave of tears threatened to swell and then fall. "I can't forgive you."

"Yes you can." Kurogane whispered, leaning closer to press his forehead against Fai's.

Fai tried to shake his head but couldn't quite do it. "No… if I do, I'll let you get closer, and you'll die if you do. I know it."

Growling loudly, Kurogane lifted his head slightly and glared, shaking it a few times, "Yuui, I'm not going to die. If I die, you die. And I told you, I'm not going to let you die so easily." He narrowed his eyes, staring into the wide, wet blue one staring so largely at him. "See? I'm not going to die." He hissed.

Smiling weakly – a real smile that threatened to fall apart at any moment, Fai closed his eye and gave a weak laugh, "Okay, Kuro-tama, you win. I… I f-forgive you." Tears did fall free this time and he shook, fear slapping itself onto his face.

With a cocky glint in his eyes, Kurogane smirked and nodded, allowing Fai to cling to him and hide his face against his chest. He stroked the blonde hair lightly – only a few times though – because if he continued, he would have to start admitting he rather liked holding an upset Fai. "We need to get back to the brat. He's probably worried."

Sniffling, Fai raised his head and stared solemnly up at him. "I'm still going to hate you for awhile."

"I don't care." Kurogane grunted, pushing the mage away gently as he stumbled to his feet, rearranging himself and buckling his pants once more.

Fai glared up at him and rubbed at his cheeks harshly to get rid of the tears there. He felt stupid for crying now. Standing on shaky legs, Fai fixed himself and buckled his pants quietly.


"You can't call me that in front of Shaoran." Fai told him, wiping his nose with the back of his hand in his attempt to keep from looking to the man.

A snort echoed through the hall and a hand fell onto the mage's head suddenly. "Just tell the kid the truth. I'm not going to call you Fai anymore. That name is a stupid mask you try to wear and I'm not going to enable you anymore." Kurogane explained as he led him down the hallway

"Kuro-pipi is mean." Fai looked up at him finally, his lower lip sticking out childishly. Though, from under that pout, there was a hint of relief, a hint of something that stated he was glad to have the weight lifted from his shoulders. "And my butt is cold. You could have at least put your hands on my ass down there to keep me warm. Such an inconsiderate lover, Kuro-puu is! Wah! What kind of monster have I decided to sleep with?" Fai wailed, lifting his hands in the air and waving them above his head as he danced away a few feet.

"Don't you start you stupid magician! If it wasn't for you, your-" Kurogane snarled, rounding on him with murder in his eyes and a blush upon his cheeks. But, staring down at the mage and the sweet, gentle smile that adorned his face, Kurogane couldn't carry on with his anger and he looked away in embarrassment. Fai delighted in this and teased him as they walked through the hallways and Kurogane fidgeted the rest of the way back to the room the group had decided to camp out in.

Fai suddenly stopped in front of the double doors, barring the way inside. "Kurogane…"

Stopping in his tracks, Kurogane felt his stomach flip and his body freeze over. He'd only heard his full name once before from the man, and that was when he awoken and silently told him he hated him.

Turning around, his head bowed and face shadowed by the lengths of blonde hair, the mage hesitated, his hands moving behind his back as he leaned against the doors, "Does Kuro-chan really not care about F- …Yuui's past?" He asked quietly, his voice trembling.

Letting his shoulder's fall and relax once more, Kurogane approached him, slipping his fingers into the mage's hair and resting his hand on his head as he reached for the doorknob behind the man, "I really don't care. You are who you are and knowing the twisted details of your past won't change anything." He tugged back on the doors and pulled it towards him releasing a wave of warm air to sweep over them.

Fai nodded against his hand, turning a bit as Kurogane began to pull away to open the door fully. Reaching out suddenly, Fai tugged on his coat sleeve like a lost child, his blue eyes gazing up at him sadly, "Really?"

Frowning, Kurogane turned to him and leaned down, forcing his lips onto the mage's for a burning but quick kiss. "Shut up and get inside."

Lowering his eyes and turning his head away, Fai quietly stepped past him and entered the room, then squealed in joy, "Mommy and Daddy made up and are happy again!" He laughed and threw his arms into the air, running towards the startled Shaoran and the joyfully bouncing Mokona.

"What the hell?" Kurogane shouted and rushed in after him, "I'm going to kill you."

"Wai! Daddy is being so cute! He just wants Mommy all to himself!" Fai clapped his hands and danced with Mokona by the hearth, his butt facing the fire in a subtle tease to the ninja about his freezing ass.

"Idiot!" Kurogane snarled, his face burning scarlet as he turned, slamming the door shut behind him and then went to destroy furniture –his excuse was so they could stay warm the rest of the night and not out of frustrated rage at the mage.

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I hope you enjoyed my bit of Tsubasa. It hasn't been beta'ed (and probably won't be unless i get a random desire to do so) and I only corrected it once, so it's really crappy and in the future i'll probably be cringing when i re-read this.

Reviews are more than welcome, asked for, and infact, they are author-crack for me! Reviews give me the desire to KEEP writing :)

And I wish CLAMP would just make these two's relationship cannon already . hell, both manga and the Anime have scenes with Kurogane's sword that just look WAY too much like a suggestion and possible teaser of things to come. Don't believe me? type in "It won't suck itself Flowright" in a goggle search and i'm sure you'll find that website with all the suggestive photos i was looking at last night. too funny just because i didn't notice them at first till someone pointed them out. and I have to admit, it does seem like CLAMP is trying to imply something with those sword possitions. anyway. i like this couple because they are not the gooey sweet that other couples are. they are bitter-sweet with a touch of lemon and cayenne-pepper on the side. hot and burns.

i originally wrote this fic so Fai could slug Kurogane at least once, but somehow that didn't make it in and i'm really sad. I wanted to Fai to also remind people he is indeed a man, but somehow hitting Kuro-chan just didn't make it into the story and i could find a place for it to really work. so it got thrown by the wayside. sorry.

but i hope you all enjoyed. thanks for reading it and don't flame me too much o.0 constructive critism is welcome but if you read this and don't like yaoi and want to flame me, My response to you is "then why the hell did you read it in the first place?" You'll more than likely get a sarcastic and pompous response than a cower and quivering "i'm sorry sorry!" uke reply. bleh.

okay, thanks for everything -

Melissa the Damgel