Master of Puppets, Demolition Chief

The Fourth Epic story by Dirty Reid

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

Caveat: Any similarities to Evilmidgetgod14's 'Mist Made Fox' and Tsunami227's 'Puppeteer' is purely coincidental.

It was a calm day above the Fire Country. The sky was the nicest shade of blue with only a couple of puffy white clouds floating through the sky. A gentle breeze would appear here or there, but the skies were as calm as the two people riding through them.

Deidara loved flying. He felt so free with the wind at his back or flying past his face. The sound of his duster cloak flapping in the wind sounded so satisfying. The blonde man also wore a tank top and fishnet shirt with orange sunglasses and black pants. On both sides of his waist were small duffel bags filled with clay that he used for his explosives. Flying was one of the ways he could just forget all of his troubles for a couple of minutes. Sometimes he simply wanted to stop being a ninja and sail through the skies forever. This was something he sorely wished to do; forget his past. Deidara was a nukenin from Iwagakure. He had been exiled four years ago after he was found guilty of blowing up the Tsuchikage's Tower, thereby killing the Tsuchikage. Some ninja would think this was a huge accomplishment. But the guilt of killing a leader (Even though he was a tyrant) of a ninja village (More importantly his own) weighed heavily upon Deidara's heart. With a sigh of contentment, the nineteen year old nin glanced at his partner.

"Beautiful day for flying, eh Sasori?" Deidara asked with a smile. The man called Sasori looked at his blonde counterpart and nodded. Sasori was a rather unusual ninja. He looked like a boy in his mid-teens, but he was actually in his late twenties. How he did this, Deidara didn't know. But he was fairly sure that it had something to do with Sasori's Hitokugutsu (Human Puppet) abilities. Sasori was a puppet master from Sunagakure, and one of the best at that. He had left Suna about ten years ago, after kidnapping and murdering the Sandaime Kazekage to use as a special puppet. Nobody had known who the kidnapper was, but Sasori's flight had led them to the conclusion that it was indeed him. For years the Suna forces had attempted to capture Sasori, only two attempts were good enough to come close enough to killing him though. Both of the assassination attempts had failed when Sasori was able to pull himself back together after being dismantled. He slaughtered the squads, and then fled. Deidara had witnessed the second attempt from afar, and had been impressed by Sasori's abilities. Some time later, Deidara had confronted Sasori. He had then proposed that they travel together to ensure that they survived the continued assassination attempts made on them. Sasori had only agreed because Deidara was also an art lover. They had been on rocky grounds at first, but after a year of traveling together, they had formed a tight friendship and earned the name "The Nigako" (Two Artists). While they were close friends, they still often argued about what art was. Deidara claimed that art was transient; something that existed for a brief flash before disappearing from existence. Whereas Sasori believed that fine art was immortal, and was something that was left long in the future. The two had different views on art due to the jutsu that they used. Deidara used clay bombs as his method of attacking. Usually this art tended to not last long. Sasori used puppets made from preserved humans. He could reassemble this art if it were damaged; creating his opinion that art was everlasting. If one who didn't know who these two nukenin were and they saw them arguing about art, one would say that they hated each other with a fiery passion. Usually these opinions tended to be wrong. The Nigakou were the best of friends, and often dropped the fa├žade of a pair of deadly, murderous nukenin when alone. Their personalities from before they went bad tended to surface when they were together. Ironically they both acted rather childish at that point, often joking about, wrestling, and starting food fights. But right now, they had a mission.

Deidara was flying them towards Konohagakure no Sato. Their mission wasn't an official one, but rather a goal. The Nigakou had been traveling from country to country, intending to learn any jutsus they could. Currently, they had an extensive library of Doton and Futon jutsus, and a decent supply of Suiton jutsu. They had a couple of Raiton jutsu, but had absolutely no Katon jutsus. This was precisely why they were traveling to Konoha; to pick up a couple of Katon scrolls and increase their strength. Both of the nukenin smiled as they began to descend as Konoha came into sight. As they approached the walls of the village, Sasori looked down upon the small clearings out of boredom. Nothing interesting was in them. But one of them caught his eye.

"Chotto matte, Deidara! Turn around for a second, there was someone in that clearing back there!" Sasori exclaimed. Curiosity piqued, Deidara manoeuvered the clay bird they were riding back towards the small clearing. Hovering over it and quickly touching down, Deidara scanned the clearing. He gasped at what he saw.

It was a small boy. He was lying face down in the grass, and his white shirt and grey pants were covered in streaks of dirt and blood. The kid had blonde hair that stuck out at all angles. From what he could see, the kid was covered in bruises and cuts. Deidara was shocked and sickened. Sasori looked disgusted as he bounded over to the boy. He crouched down and laid a finger on the boy's neck.

"He's alive," Sasori stated. "question is, what do we do with him?" the puppet master asked. Deidara looked at his fellow artist like he was stupid.

"Well, it's kind of obvious, yeah. We take him into Konoha, bring him to the hospital, and steal the scrolls on our way out!" Deidara explained. Sasori frowned.

"Yeah, you see Deidara; you forget that we're listed as S-class criminals in the Bingo Book. I really don't think that we would be able to sneak into Konoha without getting caught. If we were found on the way out, I don't think we'd get out alive, even as skilled as we are." Sasori explained. Deidara sighed in defeat. He could only think of one other option, and Sasori would not like it at all...

"Well, that means that there's only one other option that we have; we take him with us and heal him on our own, yeah." Deidara replied in a firm voice. Sasori's face was hard.

"Are you kidding me? We can't raise a kid like this! We're highly wanted criminals, and the oinin that come after us would kill the kid too. I don't care what you think of this Deidara, but I can't stand to see children slaughtered!" Sasori shouted the last part. Deidara was surprised at the outburst from his normally cool teammate, but he intended to keep trying. He also could not stand people who abused children.

"Well then why not train him? We could teach him a couple of our tricks so that he could fend for himself when we bring him back or if he gets attacked with us, yeah." Deidara offered. Sasori looked surprised, then disdainful.

"I don't know how you could teach him anything. You don't use a lot of jutsus and he doesn't have your Kekkei Genkai. That would leave-"

"Urucee, Sasori! I will be able to teach him stuff. For your information, my abilities are the result of a fuuinjutsu gone wrong, yeah. I was trying to have a seal put on myself that would give me a place to carry my clay for when I wanted to do some sculpting. But the person that was putting that seal on me screwed up and I got these bomb-moulding hands. That's what led me to be a shinobi." Deidara shot back at Sasori. The puppet nin's eyes widened as Deidara told him his story. The clay sculptor turned ninja took advantage of Sasori's silence and pressed on.

"Now Sasori, there are two options here. One; we can continue this argument and eventually you can do things my way, yeah." Deidara said as he removed his sunglasses. "Or two, we can avoid this argument and you can just say yes right now." He finished. Sasori scowled. Deidara was extremely stubborn, and would not quit until he got what he wanted. Sasori knew he was fighting a losing battle, and he didn't want to see this kid killed or die because of his injuries. He sighed, rattling the equipment on his back.

"Fine, let's get him out of here. I think I saw a cave nearby." Sasori said as he stood up and picked the little boy up. He jumped back onto Deidara's bird and it took off before Deidara could jump on. Sasori laughed as he watched a pissed Deidara shrink as he flew off.

"SASORI YOU FUCKTARD! GET YOUR SHINY, PUPPET ASS BACK HERE!" Deidara screeched. Sasori just laughed harder.


Naruto opened his eyes and tried to sit up. Bad idea. His muscles screamed in protest, even with his accelerated healing factor. He simply laid back and stayed still, waiting to recover. After a moment, he opened his eyes, but they were not greeted by the blue sky of the clearing he had been beaten in. He was instead greeted by the stone ceiling of a cave, with a faint light to his right. His muscles were not as stiff now, and he attempted to sit up again. His muscles were still sore, and he groaned in pain.

"Oh good, he's awake, yeah." Came a voice. Naruto froze in shock. Had the angry villagers moved him so that they could completely kill him this time? Naruto turned his head slowly and looked for the owner of the voice. He saw two people sitting facing the entrance of the cave, but turned to face him. One of them had a blond ponytail with a flop of hair covering his left eye. He had a smooth, angular face that was staring at him with a not unkind smirk on his face. He had on a tank top and fishnet shirt combo, covered by a duster cloak with black sweatpants and a set of orange sunglasses.

The other one was a teenage boy with flaming red hair. He was wearing a black long sleeve shirt and sweatpants. He was wearing a huge cloak that appeared to have a small bulge in the back of it. Currently, both of them were staring at him.

"You feeling okay, kid?" asked the redhead. Naruto shrank back in fear.

"Please don't hurt me! I didn't do anything!" Naruto cried, curling up and shrinking back. The blonde man frowned.

"Why would we want to hurt you? You haven't done anything wrong, yeah." He said to the boy as he stood up and walked towards him. Naruto began to inch away. The redhead saw the fear in his eyes and got up to accompany the blonde.

"Stop worrying kid, we're not going to hurt you. We were the ones who saved you from dying." The redhead said to him, crouching down and looking him in the eyes. Naruto stared into the redhead's eyes, and found not a trace of deceit or malice. Naruto also saw several emotions that he himself kept hidden: sadness, loneliness, depression. Looking at the blonde, he saw several of the same emotions in his own eyes.

"Who are you two?" he asked, with more curiosity than fear in his eyes. The blonde man smiled warmly and crouched down in front of the little boy.

"My name is Deidara," Deidara introduced himself, flashing the kid a genuinely happy smile. Naruto hesitantly returned the smile a little bit. "and this bucket of bolts over here is Sasori, yeah." Deidara jerked his thumb over and pointed at Sasori who scowled at his blonde friend. Naruto looked confused.

"Sasori doesn't look like a machine, Deidara-niisan. What are you talking about?" Naruto asked. Deidara's visible eye widened as the kid attached the 'niisan' suffix to his name. Deidara snickered evilly and yanked Sasori's arm upwards, and unscrewed it. The kid gasped when he saw Sasori's detached metal arm with its flamethrower attachment. His eyes widened in shock, and then admiration.

"SUGOI!!! THAT IS SO COOL!!" Naruto yelled, causing Deidara to wince. This kid could probably burst his eardrums if he got any louder. Sasori chuckled as he pulled his sleeve back down. Deidara was scowling as he drilled his finger into his ear.

"Oh, we never got your name kid." Sasori said to him, staring resumed. Naruto smiled foxily.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto: the next Hokage!" Naruto proclaimed loudly. Sasori's face was expressionless for a moment, but it split into a huge grin after a second. Deidara mirrored the grin.

"Well that's just great Naruto, yeah. Tell me, do you have any ninja training so far?" Deidara asked. Naruto looked downwards a little bit.

"No, but I can learn quickly! Do you know someone who can teach me?" Naruto exclaimed the last part. Sasori and Deidara looked at each other, and back at the little blonde.

"Well Naruto, we're highly skilled ninjas, and we'll both be more than willing to teach you some stuff to help you survive from... uh... what did happen to you that made you ended up lying about beaten up in the forest?" Sasori asked. Deidara had removed his sunglasses and was listening intently. Naruto's happy expression became depressed.

"It was the villagers. They hate me for some reason, and I don't know why. They call me 'monster' and 'demon' and 'fox' all the time. All the parents tell their kids not to play with me, and the only people who are nice to me are Hokage-ojiji and Teuchi-ojiji." Naruto's voice quieted at the last point. Deidara and Sasori's faces looked rather sympathetic, and soon replaced by a cold fury. But it was not directed at Naruto. Sasori looked at Deidara nervously as the blonde began to reach into one of the pouches on his waist. Fast as lightning, the redhead had the raging blonde in a full nelson.

"C'MON SASORI, LEMME GO, YEAH! LET ME JUST BLOW UP A QUARTER OF KONOHA FOR THEIR CRIMES!!!" Deidara screamed, flailing about with his eyes burning a demonic red. Naruto shrank back with a sweatdrop. Sasori looked at Naruto with a disarming grin.

"Deidara does this a lot Naruto; you're gonna have to get used to it." Sasori explained as Deidara calmed down. It was only then that Naruto noticed the mouths in Deidara's palms and became curious.

"Ne, Deidara-niisan, what are those mouths in your hands for? Biting peoples' butts or something?" Naruto asked. Deidara looked at him blankly for a second, and then threw back his head and howled with laughter. Sasori joined in after a moment.

"Ah, ha ha ha ha, ooh, that was (giggle) funny Naruto (snicker), yeah. I've actually never thought about that. But no, these mouths aren't for that. Here, let me show you what they're for." Deidara said as he reached into the left pouch and pulled out some clay, which he showed to Naruto before consuming it with his hand. He motioned for Naruto to follow him, and the little boy complied. But not without some support from Sasori. Once outside, Deidara had finished with the little clay piece, and his hand spat it out. Deidara turned and opened his hand to show Naruto the small clay spider that he had moulded. Naruto's eyes showed fascination as he reached out to touch it. Deidara pulled it away quickly.

"I wouldn't touch that Naruto. This little spider is actually a very high powered explosive, yeah." Deidara explained as he set the small spider down on the ground. It crawled over to a nearby tree that was about twenty feet tall, and latched onto it. Deidara formed a ram seal and called "Katsu!" The spider exploded spectacularly, completely destroying the tree. Naruto's mouth had fallen open. Deidara grinned at the whisker-faced child.

"Cool, right?" Deidara asked Naruto, who nodded his head so fast that Deidara was sure it would fall from his shoulders. "Would you like to learn how to do that?" he asked, causing Naruto's eyes to take up half his face.

"HELL YES!" Naruto yelled, jumping up and down. Deidara chuckled at the smaller blonde's antics, and Sasori just smiled.

"Okay then kid, we've gotta find a place away from Konoha. The process of creating these mouths draws a lot of attention, yeah."


The two nukenin and small boy had stopped in a mountain range near the borders of Earth Country. It was up on a plateau between a trinity of mountains that Deidara was writing seals all along Naruto's arms.

"Uh, Deidara-niisan, what are you writing on my arm?" Naruto asked as he tried to restrain himself from giggling; that paint brush tickled.

"Well Naruto, these are seals. They are a special type of jutsu that can allow you to do many things, yeah. One of the more common uses is sealing things in scrolls. There are some other seals that can stop a person's chakra flow, and a couple of other types." Deidara said as he finished the seals on Naruto's arms. "You done yet Sasori?" Deidara asked his puppet master friend, who was drawing a large circle around the two blondes.

"I'm done Deidara; seal away!" Sasori called as he laid both of his hands on the circle. He began to pour chakra into it, and the circle glowed blue. Naruto eyed it with apprehension.

"Don't worry about that Naruto; it's a barrier to contain the energy you're going to be emitting when you get the mouths, yeah." Deidara explained as he began to run through seals. He stopped on the fifty-third, and grasped Naruto's arm yelling "FUUIN!"

All hell broke loose after that. There was a huge flux of energy emanating from Naruto's arms which caused him to scream in pain. Deidara wasn't faring too much better. The reason that this was happening was that Deidara had just performed an incomplete fuuinjutsu. The full jutsu was supposed to simply create a bottomless void in something which could hold an unlimited supply of objects. Deidara had tried to have this done to his arms so he could store clay back when he had wanted to be a simple artist as a hobby when he was a beginner ninja. But the idiot who had tried to put it on his arms had ended on the fifty-third seal, forgetting the fifty-fourth. This had lead to the ninja wiping out about an eighth of Iwa, and inadvertently given Deidara his clay-moulding palm mouths. When Deidara had experienced what these mouths could do, he quickly learned how to use them and became Iwagakure's one-man wrecking crew. Some time later, being kind of greedy, he had changed his trade to a homicidal explosive-specializing terrorist. This had led to him blowing up the Tsuchikage Tower, killing the Tsuchikage of the time. Deidara had immediately realized his wrongs in becoming a mercenary, and fled Iwa, tears staining his face and guilt crushing his heart. He only hoped that Naruto would not let the bomb ability go to his head and start blowing countries up.

He had spent so much time reminiscing about the past that he did not notice that the chakra field and the volume of Naruto's cries had died down. Seconds later, the two blondes collapsed. Sasori released the barrier and darted in to tend to them. Deidara was the first to recover. He groaned and rubbed his temples.

"We did it, yeah." He said as he weakly stood up. Naruto was unconscious upon the ground. Deidara patted his cheeks twice to wake him up. The blonde opened his eyes slowly, and immediately groaned in pain.

"Why do my hands hurt?" he asked weakly. Deidara's eyes widened; he had said the exact same thing when his fuuinjutsu attempt had gone wrong. He quickly picked Naruto's arms up... and smiled like a maniac. Two mouths had appeared in his palms. They looked exactly like Deidara's, but the teeth were a bit pointier.

"Fuuinjutsu: Success, YEAH!" Deidara screamed the 'yeah' that he added to most of his sentence endings. Naruto looked at his hands and whooped in victory.

"YATTA! I'M JUST LIKE DEIDARA-NIISAN NOW!" Naruto yelled. Sasori cleared his throat.

"Not yet kid. We've still got to train you." The puppet master said to him. Deidara grinned as he stood straight up and took off his sunglasses.

"As of now," Sasori stated, staring the six-year-old blonde in the eyes "you, Uzumaki Naruto, are the successor of Akasuna no Sasori (Sasori of the Red Sands) and Iwagakure no Deidara (Deidara of the Hidden Rocks). The future Master of Puppets and the future Demolition Chief." Sasori said as he stared out across the mountains. Deidara and Naruto joined in the staring.

The ninja world was about to be rocked.

There we have it, the first chapter! R&R plz!

Dirty Reid