Kira: Very OOC I know, but heck, this is what will be taken place when us three get our cosplay outfits, though Zipper, one of my friends, will be a gothy, and hyper, Xemnas. I will be Zexion, while my sis is Axel. The one who's probably more IC is Zexion, maybe lol. No flames please, as this is a CRACKfic lol, with a lot of nuts and coffee beans on top. R&R please lol.

Disclaimer: I dont own any of these characters or Kingdom Hearts... Or the mall this takes place at.


"Superior… Do you really think it wise to have Number VIII on the ice? If Vexen was here, I wouldn't be too concerned, seeing as he could counteract the amount of ice the pyro is currently melting." The short nobody asked, not taking his only visible blue eye off his book. His bluish-silver hair hung over the other eye, almost touching the pages of the book that he held in his hands, sitting in a small booth that was in the area where the skaters were allowed in.

Xemnas, however, was leaning against the railing that separated the booth from the ice ring. The snickers he was making caused the Cloaked Schemer to look up in slight annoyance, wishing that he didn't have to come with the two to ice skate. Heck…. He never even ice skated in his life. But no, the amber-eyed Superior just had to drag the two along. At least the Schemer had to sense to bring his book to read.

"Hey Mansex! Get out here! This is fun!" the pyromaniac nobody yelled, waving at the two as he skated crazily around the huge ice rink. The redhead's ice skates seemed to be hot above the ice, resulting in one thing, the ice was slowly melting where he was skating. Xemnas immediately was out in the ice rink, nearly plowing into the Flurry of Dancing Flames. Zexion just blinked, staring at the two.

"HAHA! Can't catch me Superior!" Axel taunted, skating faster to get away from the silver-haired nobody.

"This is madness….. I have no clue what the Superior is on but…. Hmm, maybe it was all that coffee he drank…" he muttered, staring at the five cups of Starbucks coffee that was on the table. He shook his head, letting out a sigh as he decided that was why the Superior was acting like an idiot, eyes turning onto the two nobodies who were racing each other around the oval ice rink.

"The ice will give way in…. 5... 4… 3… 2... 1…" Zexion muttered, a small hint of a grin twisting the corners of his mouth upwards. The spot the two has been racing on, due to the pyromaniac's ignorance of heating his ice skates, caused the now thin ice to buckle under the weight of the two nobodies, causing them to fall into a knee deep water hole, resulting in them collapsing on each other. Zexion slowly stood up, putting his book under one arm and walked onto the ice, neatly skating over to the others. Almost out of thin air, he pulled out a camera.

CLICK!

The two nobodies looked up, their faces, which were pretty closed at the time, now further apart, eyes wide. Zexion had a triumphant smirk on his face.

"What was that for!?" Axel yelped, trying to disentangle himself from Xemnas, who was trying to do the same, each trying to keep Number VI in sight while he skated backwards around them.

"Another picture for my blackmail files…. I wonder what Saix and Roxas would say when they see this." The Schemer said, "And Axel, I think that this will be a reason why you should not heat your ice skates when on the ice. Fire melts ice into water." Before the other two could even attempt to tackle him, seeing as they were quite unsuccessful on the untangling part, he created a portal and stepped through it, leaving the two nobodies to deal with shopping people staring at them.