A/N: Originally this was written by request and was intended to be a short PWP, letting Chon and Roy have a little fun after all the angst. Due to the constraints of this site, I've revised almost all of the sex out of it for this version. However, just to be cautious, please note that this chapter is rated "M." Although intended to be short and plotless, somewhere along the way it became longer, and talkier--Roy loves to talk--and more serious, because for whatever reason I have a need to turn what was originally a fun, lighthearted movie into an extended angst-fest. The title is borrowed from the song "Forever May Not Be Long Enough," by Live.
Forever May Not Be Long Enough
Chon stepped forward, enfolding Roy in his warm embrace, uncaring of his wet clothes. One hand brushed Roy's damp hair out of his eyes as he reached up to press a kiss on Roy's forehead. "You don't have to explain, Roy." He kissed him again, making Roy shiver anew, this time not from the cold. "You are here. That is enough."
"It's not enough." Roy closed his eyes, leaning into Chon's warmth and love. He would never withhold himself from Chon again in any way. "I love you." His heart was full, and he could feel tears mix with the rainwater on his face as he returned Chon's embrace. "I love you, Chon."
He tightened his arms around Chon, leaning down, his face burrowing into the side of Chon's neck. He felt something inside him let go. "I love you," Roy breathed against his skin. After everything, it felt so good to say that to him. Roy raised his head to look into Chon's smiling eyes. "I love you," he repeated again, this time with more urgency. He didn't want to stop saying it. He couldn't stop saying it--for too long, the words had burned inside him, unspoken. Chon reached up to brush Roy's tears away with gentle hands. "I love--" Roy started to say again, but before the words could leave his lips Chon had covered them with his own. Chon's kiss burned through his soul, claiming him while at the same time offering him everything.
Roy was shivering again; he couldn't stop shivering as he pressed himself even closer against Chon. He clung to him, half-ashamed of his own neediness. Roy's palms were lying flat against the skin of Chon's back. He slid his hands downward in a sweeping caress, then lower to slip beneath the waistband of Chon's pants. Chon flinched and drew back as far as Roy's embrace would allow. "Roy, your hands are freezing!''
"Mmm, you'll just have to find a way to warm them up," Roy murmured in what he hoped was his most seductive tone. Unfortunately, his chattering teeth marred the effect.
"First, get out of these wet clothes." Chon reached for the buttons of Roy's shirt as Roy leaned in for another slow, sweet kiss. Chon fought the wet material unsuccessfully until Roy started to smile against his lips. Chon pulled back and looked up at Roy. "It's not working," he said, and Roy couldn't help laughing--it felt so good to laugh again.
Chon's lips quirked up in the beginnings of a smile, then his eyes took on a definite mischievous glint. He firmly grasped the collar of Roy's shirt, tensing as if to tear it open. Roy quickly put his hands over Chon's.
"Wait! Stop, stop, stop," Roy laughed. "This is my favorite shirt." Affecting an air of long-suffering patience, Roy sighed. "Let me do it." After a brief struggle while Chon looked on with impatience, Roy worked the first button loose.
"See?" Roy said triumphantly. He looked up to meet Chon's eyes. Chon's look was darkly passionate and almost predatory, and Roy felt his breath catch before the space between them disappeared. They came together almost desperately, mouths seeking, Roy's tongue delving deeper into the warm, sleek interior of Chon's mouth. Chon's hands slipped under the bottom of Roy's shirt, easing it upward. Roy released Chon and raised his arms as Chon pulled the shirt up and over his head before tossing it on the floor. Roy briefly felt the cool morning air on his skin before Chon reached for him again, pulling them together. Roy kissed him fiercely, devouring him, and Chon's response was so unreserved and welcoming that Roy's heart overflowed with love for this man. He couldn't get enough of Chon, would never get enough of him. His touch drove away all of the darkness and guilt that had been Roy's constant companions these last months.
"I'm sorry," Roy whispered between kisses. "I'm so sorry for everything . . . I've been awful to you."
"Shh, Roy. I understand. I love you."
As they kissed, Chon's hands traveled across the sensitized skin of Roy's chest. Roy's whole body was rigid with urgency. Roy's heart thundered beneath Chon's palm. Chon's lips followed his hands, brushing lightly. Roy's breathing became harsh and rapid as Chon moved lower.
Chon's hands reached the buttons of Roy's trousers. He looked up, and Roy felt devoured by his scalding gaze. Chon worked the buttons loose as Roy's mouth went dry and breath stopped with a sharp anticipation, on the razor's edge of pain. Yet, Roy stopped Chon's hands. He didn't want this to be like last time. That night in the cabin he'd been selfish, taking from Chon and giving nothing in return. This time he wanted it to be different.
Roy pulled Chon to him and kissed him again, plundering his mouth. Chon broke away and with breathless urgency he said, "Come with me." He led him through the small house to the room in back where Chon slept.
The room was small, barely more than a closet. Roy's look was dubious as he eyed the thin mattress on the floor. "This is where you sleep?"
"Roy, shhhh," Chon said, pushing him gently down onto the bed. Roy was mesmerized as Chon removed the thin cotton sleep pants he wore. The one time they had been together it had been under a veil of darkness. This time Roy wanted to see everything--the way Chon looked when he touched him, the way Chon's body responded to Roy's touch.
"Come here," Roy whispered, barely able to speak. He pulled Chon down next to him onto the bed, stretching out next to him, feasting his hands and eyes on the splendor of Chon's naked skin. Roy's fingers seemed extraordinarily sensitized to the texture of Chon's flesh. Muscles leapt beneath his slightest touch. "You feel so good," Roy breathed. "I love touching you."
"I love having you touch me," Chon replied.
Roy was on fire, his body urgently demanding Chon's touch. There was an agonizing minute as Roy fought to remove his pants and boots, and then there was nothing between them.
Roy moved down Chon's body relentlessly. "Roy--?" Chon questioned, realizing Roy's intent. "You don't have to."
Chon's simple words almost broke Roy's heart. I've never done this before. The thought hit him with brutal force. With the others, those faceless, forgotten men, Roy had never reciprocated. He'd used his charm to talk them into whatever he'd wanted. I've been a selfish bastard, he thought, but no more. He didn't want that for the two of them. Chon deserved better, but Roy knew he wasn't doing this out of a sense of obligation. He wanted to do it, wanted to touch Chon, to taste Chon, wanted to know everything there was to know about him. He wanted to give everything of himself to Chon, and he would.
As soon as his body was capable of movement, Roy shifted and crawled back around to lie side by side with Chon, throwing an arm across him as he kissed his shoulder. Never in his life had he become so lost in another person, never had he reveled in the pleasure he could provide or felt such a sense of belonging.
"Wow." Roy realized he must be grinning at Chon like an idiot, but couldn't help himself. I could get used to this, he thought as he waited for his breathing to return to normal.
The early morning sun filtered through the window, forming a warm golden pool over the bed. Chon's fingers traced a lazy pattern on Roy's arm. Roy gathered him close, feeling a peace and contentment he'd never known. He could feel Chon's eyes on him and raised his head to face him.
"What is it?"
"You are beautiful."
Roy almost squirmed. He could feel his face redden, and marveled that he could feel any embarrassment after the things they'd just shared. "You're crazy, Chon. Men aren't beautiful." He turned his head away.
Chon grasped his chin with a firm hand and turned Roy back to look at him. "You are." He kissed the tip of Roy's nose. "What happened here?" he asked as he traced the bridge of Roy's nose with his index finger.
"Nothing. I broke it. Twice. It's not a very interesting story." He looked away again, trying to avoid Chon's eyes, but he would have none of it.
"Tell me?" Chon's expressive dark eyes were wide and pleading, and Roy was helpless against that look.
"Oh come on. I hate it when you look at me like that." Yet, he could deny Chon nothing and if he wished, Roy would share with him even the parts of his life that he wasn't proud of recalling. "The first time, I was only 13. I was my first time riding with a gang. I was just a kid. I think they kept me around more for entertainment than anything else." His eyes darkened momentarily before he continued, and Chon smoothed his hand over Roy's shoulder reassuringly. "We were robbing a stagecoach. I . . . well, I fell off my horse," he said, embarrassed. He could tell that Chon realized there was more to the story, but appreciated him not pressing the issue right now.
"The second time was a few years ago. Some cowpoke accused me of cheating at poker."
The denial sprang automatically to his lips. "No!" Chon simply looked at him, love and understanding in his eyes. "I might have been," Roy amended. "He beat me up pretty good. It hurt like the devil." Roy gave a half laugh. "Not a very nice story, is it. I haven't lead a very admirable life," he said, bitterness creeping into his voice. He smiled wryly. "So, with this nose, I'm hardly beautiful."
Chon's touch was light as a butterfly as he ran his fingertips down the side of Roy's face. "Yes you are. I have never seen eyes so blue. But it is your heart that makes you beautiful. I told you before, I know the man you truly are."
Uncomfortable but pleased at the same time, Roy changed the subject. "What about you?"
Chon smiled ruefully and rubbed his own nose. "Fighting stick."
"You don't have much luck with those, do you?"
"I have other skills that make up for it." Chon's voice was suspiciously deadpan.
Roy gaped at him. "Chon, was that another joke?" Chon's eyes twinkled back at him and his lips twitched. Roy didn't know whether to laugh or kiss him, so he did both.
Reluctantly, Chon drew back. "I must go."
Roy raised himself up on one elbow. "What?"
"To Pei Pei. I have to tell her I am not going with her."
Roy exhaled and lay back, staring up at the ceiling. "Chon . . . what you and Pei Pei are doing--it's important. You're giving hope to a lot of people. For me to put a stop to that, well, it just wouldn't be right."
"I am not leaving you. Do you want me to go?"
"No! Yes." Roy sighed and turned to look at Chon again. "What I mean is, I'll go with you, if that is what you want to do."
"You would do that?" Chon's smile was brilliant.
"Well don't act so surprised. Of course I would." He looked away, almost shyly. "I love you," he added in a small voice.
Chon's response was to roll on top of Roy and kiss him until he was breathless. Incredibly, he could feel his body respond again and wondered if he'd ever get enough of this man he loved so much. "I thought you had to leave," Roy gasped.
"Then don't be starting something that you can't finish."
"I will never be finished with you. A lifetime will not be enough for us."
Roy's heart skipped and he felt tears burn in his eyes. Having someone love him like this was still a new and humbling experience, one he hoped he'd never completely get used to. He started to pull Chon back to him, but this time Chon resisted.
"I'm sorry--" he began.
"Yeah, yeah. You don't just say something like that to a man and then leave him."
"Just go," Roy grumbled. "I sure don't want the princess showing up here now."
Chon kissed him lightly before climbing out of bed. Shivering slightly at the loss of Chon's warmth, Roy sat up, pulling the blanket around him. Chon stood, and Roy unabashedly admired the view. Chon had the firm and well-muscled body of an athlete, and Roy completely lost his train of thought as he watched him dress.
"She knows about us," Chon said.
"What?" Roy asked, distracted by the sight of Chon stepping into his pants.
"Pei Pei. She knows."
Roy shook his head. "Don't remind me. I can't believe you told her!"
"I did not tell her. She knew. She asked me if it was true, and I could not lie."
A shadow passed over Roy's face, and he held back the words he almost said, You're going to have to learn how to lie. Chon seemed so innocent in many ways, so eager to believe the best about the world. Roy hated to be the one that would spoil that, but it was inevitable if they were going to be together. Roy banished such thoughts for the time being. There would be time enough for that later. They would have their reality soon enough--but not today. Roy gathered the blanket around him and stood to face Chon.
Chon was buttoning his shirt, but stopped to put a hand on Roy's arm. "Roy, what is it?"
Roy mustered a reassuring smile. "Nothing. I was just worried that the princess would show up and give me some more of her great advice."
"She told me about that. I am glad she did."
"Oh you are, are you? I'm not. It was one of the most embarrassing moments of my life!"
"She was just trying to help."
"She does a lot of that, doesn't she? I think we need to find her some of her own romantic interests so she doesn't have as much time to worry about us. What are you going to say to her?" Roy asked as he followed Chon into the front room.
"I will tell her I cannot go with her today. I must tell her why not," Chon said, and Roy reluctantly nodded his agreement. "I will ask if she will wait until we decide what we are going to do." Chon paused. "Roy, we don't have to leave Carson City. There is still much to be done here. I like living here, and you are a good lawman."
"We don't have to decide anything right now. We can talk about it another time. My plans for you for the rest of the day don't involve much talking," Roy said in a low voice. He could feel the awareness between them and read the answering spark of desire in Chon's eyes.
"Will you wait here for me?" Chon asked.
"Hell no! I'm going back to my own house, where there is a proper bed. And, a bathtub," he added, raising his eyebrows and grinning. "I'll be waiting for you there."
"I will hurry, Roy," Chon said, and his voice held such sweetness and promise that Roy felt a tremor go through him.
"You'd better leave while you still can," Roy said, reaching for the door. Chon stopped him. Grasping the blanket Roy had wrapped around himself, he pulled the younger man to him for a lingering kiss that quickened Roy's pulse and left him shaken. "I love you, Roy."
There it was again, the now-familiar sensation of tears that Roy tried to blink away. "I love you, too, Chon. Now, get out of here!" he said gruffly. He opened the door. Chon left with one last smile that made Roy's heart turn over.
Roy shut the door and walked back into the room. He sank down into chair, feeling dazed. He still couldn't quite comprehend that last night had actually happened, that he and Chon were together. There were so many questions to be answered about their future. What would happen now? Where would they live? How could they make this work? These thoughts and more crowded his mind. He shook his head--this day, he resolved, would be for him and Chon alone. Tomorrow they could deal with the rest of the world.
I don't deserve to be so happy Roy thought, but he didn't want to question his good fortune. The road ahead would not be smooth for them. His life with Chon would have more than its share of challenges, of both joy and sorrow. Above all, it would be an adventure. With Chon by his side, Roy could hardly wait for it to begin.
Chon was right. One lifetime would not be enough for them.
A/N – So there it is, my long-lost Shanghai Noon epic. I have a few other things I'd forgotten I'd written, also from 2001. Some of them have never seen the light of day before. Look for them in a few days. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and encouraged me in a very small fandom!