Original start time: Sunday June 10, 2007; 12:49 PM PDT
Rewritten start time: Saturday June 30, 2007; 6:12 PM PDT
Original Author's Note: So this is my new oneshot, just like I promised at the end of chapter sixteen of Charm Bracelet.

What's this oneshot about? AU, Link/Zelda, and they're both Freshmen in college. Link is a slacker: procrastination manifest, couldn't care less about grades, you know the type. Zelda is once again being typecasted as the smart, top of her class, could shoot up her school and probably get away with it because of her grades kind of girl. Their history professor has paired up the students in their class as "study buddies" so they can review for their final exams faster, and these two have been paired (is it fate, or one giant cliche? People who say something is cliched are cliched, remember that). This is basically about their first study session together. It has all that good romance, innuendo and humor that Link/Zelda shippers around the universe are looking for, probably on the same level as Memoirs of a Boyfriend. This is gonna be told from Zelda's point of view.

Rewritten Author's Note: Why did I decide to rewrite this? Because after rereading it many times, there was that element of Zelink romance missing. So I decided to go back and rewrite it. But while I was updating the chapter, I accidentally deleted the story! OH NO! Don't ask why, even I don't know. I can't begin to tell you how much of a panic attack I was having. But then no use in crying over spilt milk (or deleted oneshots), so I just reloaded this. The ending is entirely different, and may be more appealing to those looking for that fluffy Egyptian cotton Zelink romance.

I don't own The Legend of Zelda.

The Antithesis of Academic Perfection


If there's such thing as the antithesis of academic perfection, Link Avalon is it.

Link is a guy in my Hylian History class at Hyrule University. Hyrule U. is the most prestigious college in the country, and probably the entire world. How Link ever got in is beyond me.

We've been classmates ever since our Freshman year in high school. To be honest, I'm surprised he's even continuing his education. Better yet, I'm surprised he even made it through high school; I personally thought he would drop out at one point or another.

You see, school and academics aren't exactly the first things on Link's list of priorities. Rarely do you ever see him even try to crack open a book. You have a better chance of catching him at a frat party getting drunk or playing grab-ass around the sorority houses than see him at least attempting to look studious.

It's nearing the end of our first year in college, and watching Link wade his way though the school year has been no different than the past four that I've known him for: show up late on the first day, do half-ass work, procrastinate until the last minute, cram and try to pull up his grade point to a D average so he can pass onto the next year... Same old, same old.

A few days ago we started reviewing for finals. Our Hylian History teacher came up with this "brilliant idea" to help us get more studying worked in: pair kids together. He picked who gets paired with who. I wanted to work with my best friend Malon, but did that work out?

Hell no.

I had to be paired with Link, the antithesis of academic perfection. I've lost count of how many times I've tried to negotiate his decision, but he kept turning me down. All I know is that I begged enough times to drive him to threaten me by dropping my final semester grade a letter. Since he was that serious about it, I just gave up. Maybe it's because I'm at the top of the Freshmen class, and he's looking at this situation as a case of "pair up the smart girl with the stupid boy for a school assignment." You know, one of those cheesy bills for a show or movie or something. Whatever.

I recline into my seat, twirling my pen around between my fingers.

After I gave up on trying to switch my study parter, I've moved on to bugging Link about when and where we'd get together and at least try to get some studying done. It's always the same tired responses that I get from him.

"Quit bugging me, I'm doing something important."

"Not now, Zelda. I have... company over."

After much prodding, he finally caved in. We agreed that we'd meet here at Error's Cafe at 2:15. It's now 2:25. Fashionably late? I think not. Probably stood me up, no less; he probably just told me to meet him here to get me off his back, and he's probably in bed with a girl at his dorm right now.

A few more minutes pass, and I finally figure that he's not going to show up. I sigh deeply and open up my textbook. I might as well just get some studying done. I look up before reading the page that I opened to, and then I see Link walk through the door, notebooks and textbooks under his arm and his black backpack slung over his shoulder.

He showed up? Wow, I didn't really expect him to.

He catches sight of me and smirks lopsidedly. He zig zags around a few tables and walks up to me.

"Well I'm here," he says, his tone filled with reluctance. "You happy?"

His unruly blonde hair is a total mess, tangles and knots clearly visible. His bangs hang in front of his dazed looking blue eyes. His light blue shirt is littered with wrinkles and creases, but it still hugs his torso, the contours of his muscles visible through the wrinkles. Sweat beads glisten on his face, neck and arms. He's lightly scented with stale sex, but I can tell he tried to cover it up with cologne... He was obviously doing something before he came here, and I think I'm better off just not knowing what.

"Not if you're going to sound like that the whole time," I shoot back, looking away from him and tucking a few strands of my light blonde hair behind my ear. From the corner of my eye I can see him roll his eyes and hang his shoulders. "Come on, Zel." He shakes his head. "I showed up, that should be good enough, right?"

I narrow my eyes at him. "Don't call me that."

I say that I don't want him to call me "Zel", but deep down, I really like it.

Okay, I'll admit that I have a tiny crush on Link--A TINY ONE. So tiny you'll need a microscope to see it. I remember when I first saw him in 9th grade, I was immediately infatuated with him and his piercing blue eyes, his shaggy blonde hair, his charming, boyish smile, his toned and well defined body... But that was almost four years ago. I've developed a better taste in boys in that time... But between you and I, I still have this thing for Link--but it's STRICTLY physical attraction. That's as far as I'll ever get to liking this poor excuse for a student, the antithesis of academic perfection.

"Why not?" He raises an eyebrow. "I think it's cute."

"I beg to differ," I shake my head, holding up my hard exterior. He takes his seat across from me, setting his books on the table and his backpack next to him on the floor. He just stares straight at me, his gaze connecting with mine. We stay like that for the longest time before I pull away, shaking my head.

"You know you like it," he leans forward, resting an elbow on the table and hanging his hand off the edge. "Zel."

I sigh exasperatedly and pick up my pencil. "Lets just get to work."

"Fine by me." He responds. He opens up his notebook, grabs a pencil and starts writing. We both work in silence. A few minutes in, a waitress comes up to us, a notepad and pencil in hand.

"Would you two like anything to drink?" She asks with a smile.

"I'll have a caramel cappuccino," I tell her.

"...You guys got any beer?" Link asks her, looking up from his paper. She just rolls her eyes and walks away into the kitchen. He watches after her, and though I can't see it, it's blatant that he's checking out her behind. He turns to me and sighs elatedly.

"Her customer service skills suck... But baby got back," he smirks smugly and nods his head. I just shake my head and sigh. In addition to being arguably the worst student ever, he's also the biggest womanizing, flirtatious jackass ever.

"I give her an 8," he says. "What do you think?"

I scoff at him and raise an eyebrow. "I refuse to answer that!"

"Why not? I don't see the problem."

"For one, I'm a girl..."

He shrugs his shoulders. "Like I said, I don't see the problem."

I stare at him incredulously, having an idea of what he's trying to say. "What are you implying, Link!?"

He just scoots his chair back, holding up his arms defensively. "Hey, all I'm saying is that you and Malon get a little too close for comfort sometimes..."

My jaw falls open at him. Is he trying to say that I'm a lesbian!?

"Not that I have a problem with it," he shakes his head. "I quite like it myself. Good show to watch."

"Ugh!" I groan disgustedly and I hurl my eraser at him. "Link Avalon, you're the biggest jackass I've ever met!"

The eraser hits him square in the forehead. He grunts softly and the small block falls down into his lap. He rubs his forehead as he picks it up and casually tosses it back and forth between his hands. He smirks again and shakes his head, scooting back in. "Say what you want, Zelda, but deep down, you know you want me."

I gasp and my cheeks turn beet red at his remark. His grin widens. "I can tell by how much you're blushing."

"I do not!" I stamped my right foot. "Where would you get such a ludicrous idea!?"

"High school Sophomore year," he nods. "April 23, 2004."

I raise an eyebrow at him. "...What about April 23, 2004?"

"Remember?" He tilts his head to the side. "Obviously you don't... That was the day you flashed me!"

My eyes go wide and I swear my jaw would have hit the floor if I didn't control it. "THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT!"

He laughs claps his hands. "Aha! So you admit it happened!"

I struggle to say something. Anything in my defense.

So I flashed him once, so what? I didn't do it on purpose though! It was sunny, the period was PE, and I was wearing a sweatshirt. I stopped to take off my sweatshirt, but my T-shirt came up with it. I wasn't wearing a bra that day. Link was in front of me, and I guess he turned to face me like he had something to tell me, and that's when he saw my exposed chest. Ever since it happened, he'd take one look at me and giggle stupidly or something.

"...It was an accident!" I kick under the table, slapping my hands against the arm rests of my chair and he just laughs at me.

"I'll never forget that," he smiles. "...Say Zelda, what's your bra size, anyway?"

My eyes widen even more at that question. "E-excuse me!?"

He leans over to me slightly and examines my chest. "...You look kind of like a B cup to me... Maybe a C."

...Did I just hear this idiot right!?

"I'm not answering that!" I push him back into his seat, and he grunts loudly on impact. "You letch!"

"Whatever Zel," he smirks. "but just know that sooner or later, I'm gonna find out."

I just roll my eyes, refusing to fuel the argument any further. That's when the waitress comes back. She sets a small white cup filled with light brown liquid with a teaspoon and saucer in front of me, and she hands Link a bottle of beer.

"Thank you," I say to her.

"Thanks," Link nods. The waitress flashes one more smile and walks away.

I sip my cappuccino quietly and watch him guzzle down his beer, his large gulps clearly defined going down his throat. A few seconds later, he sets the glass bottle down with a clank. He reclines in his seat, slipping his hand under his shirt to scratch his torso. His shirts lifts up lightly, exposing his dark blue plaid boxers and bellybutton, an outline of a happy trail visible from where I'm sitting.

"...Quit staring, Zelda." I hear him snicker. My gaze immediately pulls away from his toned abs and I almost spit out my drink on my textbook. I struggle to swallow my gulp, and when I do, I let out a few coughs and gasps for breath. He just smiles and shakes his head at me. I give him a dirty look and brush a few strands of hair out of my face.

"...So what do you have so far?" I ask him about his notes after I take notice of just how sidetracked we've gotten.

He gives me a questioning look.

"Your notes," I clarify. "What do you have in your notes?"

"...Oh." He slowly takes his notebook and closes it. "Nothing."

He's obiously been writing something secretive. Probably a love letter to his latest squeeze.

"Come on," I slightly raise an eyebrow. "I showed you my breasts, the least you could do is show me your notebook."

Before he can do anything, I snatch the notebook from him.

"Hey! Zelda!"

I open to the last page with writing on it, and I'm taken aback by what I see.

He's filled the entire page with a very comprehensive outline of the chapter. The handwriting is neat and legible. It looks like something... that I'd write. But even my notes don't even look this good. Link Avalon wrote this? The same Link that chases girls all day and ends the night piss-drunk?

I can tell he's reading my mind by his knowing smirk, though he's blushing a little bit. "What can I say? I have a knack for anything social studies related."

"But I don't get it," I shake my head. "Why are you getting such a low grade in history if you can do this kind of work?"

He chuckles and reaches for his backpack. "Who said I'm getting a bad grade in history?" He takes out a packet and gives it to me. I see that it's the last test we took in history, and all the answers are right.

"YOU'RE the one that got the perfect score!?" My jaw falls open. This was a really hard test; not even I could get a perfect score. He smiles and shrugs slightly. I think back to the day we got the tests back.


I take my test from Professor Rauru. A bold B- is on the top of the paper. I sigh in soft disappointment and tuck the test into my notebook, not wanting to look at it any longer.

"The scores this test were generally mediocre," Professor Rauru speaks as he continues to pass out the tests. "...I take that back. 'Mediocre' is giving you guys way too much credit. You guys will have to do a lot of reviewing in this chapter if you hope to do well in this section on the final exam."

"Damn," I hear Sheik curse behind me. I look over my shoulder to the Sheikah, with Link to his right. "I got a D... What'd you get, Link?"

I see Link take a look at his paper, and he scretively turns it over and places it on his desk. He leans forward so his weight is on the test. "...What does it matter?" Link shrugs. He picks up his pen and twirls it around his index and middle finger.

"However," Rauru continues as he turns to all of us, "one of you got a perfect score... One of my best students."


"...I still don't get it," I scratch my head.

"I didn't think you would," he shakes his head. "I'm a very complex person." He takes another drink of his beer.

I roll my eyes and hand him his notebook back, and we continue studying in silence.


We're both standing outside the cafe. It's about six in the evening, and from the East Village Promenade across the street, I can see the bay straight in front of me with Metrodome City on the other side all lit up as the sun slowly sinks into the horizon and the day shifts into twilight.

Much to my surprise, Link and I got a lot of studying done. He actually helped me and tutored the section to me, and what's scarier is that I understood it. I still can't believe that Link of all people is Professor Rauru's "best student". Looks are deceiving I suppose.

"So are you happy?" Link asks me, his backpack slung over his shoulder and his books under his arm. "We got the section covered, I tutored you..."

"Actually," I start, brushing a few strands of hair out of my face as a soft breeze sweeps past us. "Yeah, I am... Thanks, Link." I manage to utter out. He just chuckles and shakes his head.

"Zelda, I know that you don't think too highly about me. I know I get on your nerves a lot..." He reaches for me with his free hand and takes me into his arm. "...I guess it's just my little way of sayin' 'I like ya'," he winks at me.

Goddesses, he's so fine.

I feel my cheeks blush furiously and he laughs softly at me. "So since I know that you like me..."

I roll my eyes.

"...And you know that I like you now..."

My breath gets caught in my throat. He was serious about that!? "...How about you and I go out on a date sometime?" He flashes a charming smile. "One with less 'I'm here against my will' and a little more of that 'get to know each other and maybe be more than study partners' stuff?"

I stare deeply into his blue eyes. For the first time, it looks like he's being serious about us together and on a date. He wiggles his eyebrows up and down slightly, which causes me to giggle. "...I guess it can't hurt to go out on just one date," I shrug, hugging my books to my chest.

"Alright," he nods happily, grinning goofily, flashing his pearl white teeth. "How about this Friday at six?"

"Sounds good," I agree. "Where at?"

"Lady's choice," he gestures to me. "Wherever you want is good for me."

I nod slowly at his answer. "I'll think about it and let you know before then."

"No problem," he shakes his head. He takes my hand in his and holds it up to his mouth, gently pressing his lips against the backside. My eyes go wide and my heartbeat hastens at his gesture.

"Let the record show that Zelda Harkinian just made a date with me, Link Avalon." He proclaims proudly as he looks up at me, a seductive grin on his face. "I'll see you in class... Zel."

He casually salutes me with two fingers and walks away towards the Promenade Subway Station, leaving me totally flustered and breathless.

Original Author's Note: That's the end. Another irrelevant tidbit: after the flashback scene, I got sidetracked and watched HappySlip's videos on the YouChoob--she cracks me up!

Another autobiographical moment: when Link got flashed by Zelda. Yes people, I WAS FLASHED! It was by my friend. Want details? Ask me on Xanga/Myspace/AIM/Gmail/private message.

I'm already thinking up ideas for a new oneshot. That should be up fairly soon hopefully. Still in the middle of my creative tangent, so I should come up with something.

Rewritten Author's Note: I've decided to stop updating my GeoCities. I'm already swamped with keeping my Myspace, Xanga and Fanfiction stuff updated, GeoCities was just dead weight on an already heavy load. So I moved the maps of Hyrule and Castle Town to my deviantART, and the usual profile stuff--About Me, Contacts, User Stats--are back on my profile here but more user friendly. I very much like my profile now. It's not really anything to be excited over, but if you were me, you'd understand.

Review please, and Enjoy Life and Smile.

Original end time: Sunday, June 10, 2007; 4:40 PM PDT
Rewritten end time: Saturday June 30, 2007: 7:08 PM PDT