Charlie: My seventh story! Sorry for the long wait, but it was a much needed vacation and I enjoyed it. I am refresh with ideas along with a new streak. However...I don't know if I should bring back Narra to do the Conversation with me. Tell me if you guys like him. Let's see... oh, yeah I should do a disclaimer.

Disclaimer: The story Naruto does not belong to me. If I did, it definitely wouldn't be about ninjas. No offence to the author because he is really creative for thinking of the story.

Charlie: I have a friend who may or may not be reading this, but if you are, "Haha, I'm going to the upcoming anime con and not you! In your face, beeyotch!" ...I'm kidding...about the last part. Anyway, this story is different from the rest because Naruto is unhappy. He's the angst teenager that should've been Sasuke. But he still has some of the happy Naruto's usual traits, except it's the bad ones.

Thou Shalt Not Kill

By Charlie

Chapter One: My Name

My name is Uzumaki Naruto. I'm sixteen years old, and my life was great. Notice the 'was' in my sentence. You would assume that it sucks right now, and I would tell you that you're absolutely wrong. It's much worse than 'suck'. It is much worse than hell. You know what; I think I would rather be in hell. Compared to this, it's sunshine.

I am currently "sleeping," but I am fully awake to the extent that I can hear my oji-san (uncle) come up the stairs. I turn off my alarm (barely missing my parent's photo) and got out of bed. Even though knowing that he was right outside the door, I opened it anyway, almost smacking him in the face. His shock-changing-to-glaring face met my eyes. Aw, he looks so happy to see me.

"You're late for school," he said through large gritted teeth. Meet Jiraiya, my oji-san. A true living statement of bad parenting. It could be that I was raised in a bar. Being at an old age, he looked thirty. The white hair and board shoulders. It's disgusting.

I yawn and push past him to the bathroom. I slam the door shut before saying, "I hate you." An understatement it may be, but it is the only words strong enough to express my rage. He seems satisfied enough by it to not yell at me and heads back downstairs. Besides, he knows full damn well I have a reason to.

Two days ago, I was innocently walking home from school when my oji-san decided to pick me up…during my walk. He drifted from five blocks down, using a move he had learned from watching an American movie. Well, there was screeching tires, smoke, and a permanently traumatized teenager who I don't really pity. In broad daylight.

I didn't even notice him, mostly because of my iPod. He had swerved the car so that it ended halfway up on the sidewalk. You know the little strip of land where people walk. He rolled down the window and I can still remember his grinning face saying, "Hop in." I really didn't know where we were going, nor did I bother to ask. It was one of his weird moments, or at least I figured it to be. It wasn't until we were a good distance away from home and wondering into the unknown did I ask. He only smiled and drove the car into what I remembered to be a bar called Chances. It's really famous in the US for being a lesbian club.

That's when I found out.

He enrolled me into an elite high school without bothering to tell me. I mean it's just my life he was changing and controlling with unbelievable idiocy. I don't know how it was related to all the lesbians, but he did tell me when we were in there.

Oh well. There was nothing I can do since he did raise me and he never did let me forget it. 'How bad can an elite school be anyway?' was what I thought at the moment, but when I saw the brochure for …uh…hmm? I'll remember to ask someone the name of the school later. It was a pretty brochure with the traditional summaries of how wonderful my life was going to be like, and it was a total lie.

The minute I had get in the car, my uncle decides innocent bystanders don't matter as long as I get to school on time. Oji-san, unfortunately, drives up to the front door (literally). It is embarrassing to say the least, but thank god nobody noticed, I think. The black tire marks on the concrete floor might be a problem, but it's not my problem.

The classroom proves to be easy enough to find. All the little heads that were facing downward look up to greet me with curious eyes. Oh, how I wish I could just rip the-. Ahem. Well, uh…I walk to my seat.

My motto is 'See not what you don't want to see, kill those who have seen you.'

So…this is what I did and want. My grades will not go above average or below it. My behavior will not be out of the ordinary or below it. My new "friends" will not be out of order or below it. My actions will not attract attention or….well, there's nothing more to that part.

This elite school is literally a mine field ready to set off at any minute. One look is all it takes for me to tell that they are spoiled stupid brats. It was the Land of Stereotype. The place that I hate most in the world because if you haven't noticed, I go to school there. Yeah, and my uncle knows that I know. He's thinking that if I went here, I'll probably combust and open up to someone who also has had a dramatic experience as mine.

…I say bullshit.

Now saying all that, I didn't come unprepared. I pulled an all-nighter and researched every sucker in here until I knew how many hairs they had when they're born.

Warning: If anyone of these brats in this damn school dares to push me over the edge, they are going to have a first row view of what their insides look like. I hope to god these people here are smart enough for that.


Or not.

That voice, oh how I wish to destroy you. It was the voice of an arrogant boy, around my age. I don't even have to look at his face to tell there are no emotions on it. A blank paper that is going to be drawn on, as I like to say. I take a glance to see who my predator is. It's very important to know your enemies. He has red hair, green eyes, a carved-in tattoo of the word LOVE from what I can see, and a punk style dress code. And to my surprise, no…eyebrows. Either he got a really good waxing job or…

I resist the urge to laugh and ask, "What happened?" Stoic guys don't like it when you ask them questions about themselves. Some might answer due to surprise and later on become friends with you, only to pile you with their family complications, which I do not need. Save it for his sister or somebody who cares.

I rack my brain for information and finally settled on Sabaku Gaara. Anti-social, possibly an unknown relative of a werewolf as described in a fight, kind of smart. The profile doesn't say much about him personally, not the kind I need anyway. An older brother away at college, oldest sister is Konoha's school nurse (Temari), mother (mistress) died giving birth, and father died in a car accident (Gaara was in it too, but he survive) when he was ten years old. Gaara was supposedly blamed for the accident and thus called 'The Monster' (anything evil relating).

Is it such a mystery why he turned out this way?

And I realize everyone is giving us a look. I can tell that I am expected to grovel in fear. Sigh. But even knowing that, I also know that being the new kid, I have to at least act ignorant and then grovel.

Fking bastards.

"Oh, is this your seat?" I ask. The more oblivious the better. That's the key to success, in my case.


Oooh, he's one of those types that are so emotionless they can't even feel the pain of a knife slash, but they have the tendency to constantly remind themselves of it (hence the carved in tattoo). It's to feel pain, but a more emotional kind of pain that runs really deep. Dude, this school actually accepted him? Well…I'm not exactly one to talk here seeing as how I'm a bit crazy myself. And moving on…

"Oh, ok." I smile, showing all my pearl-white teeth, and move. I am about to sit down in the back when I am literally pushed out of the way. One day, you watch, one day I am going to punch whoever did that.

"Watch where you're going, moron!"

Ladies and gentleman, introducing the shrill voice of a bitch!

I stand up and wipe the invisible specks of dirt from my pants. She's probably trying to sit next to her crush, and I am proven to be right. Turning around, I see a something that should've been listed in the Hall of Records. She is a pretty girl. Pink hair (an unusual color) and green eyes, but good god, that forehead! I have never seen anything like it before in my life. Short legs, tall backs, yes, but that thing looked like it could have a life of its own! When I was researching, I did see a photo of her, but….ugh!

She must've notice I am staring, because she speaks. All I hear is "….," but from what I can tell, she's smart, but chooses to hide it. Probably thinks guys don't like smart girls or she's too obsessed with her boyfriend (I'm just guessing here) to even bother using her brains. Her boyfriend is the….

I am again speechless. This school….this school is a dream come true. If ever I shall break out of my cage and be able to strike havoc, I will truly enjoy it. These people here, they have labels that say, 'Make a joke at me, I'm stupid!' all over them. It's like a miracle, and yet so deadly. Do you know how many jokes I can make of these fools? That's like a thousand, no, a zillion! Whoa, I just have a brillian-! Oh, that's right. I'm supposed to act nice for stupid Jiraiya-ojisan. What kind of a name is Jiraiya, anyway?

Ugh, I have to be "normal". What a total bust.

"Sorry, but commoners like you, I have to charge," she states.

I blink; because it's then I realize she's talking about my staring. The penny in my pocket itches to come out and into her hand, but I have to compliment her; she is smart when dealing with someone she hates. It's true; that was a nice insult.

"Stop it," says a calm, deep voice.

Oh, the reason I was speechless a moment ago. I look behind her to her boyfriend. Black eyes and black hair that resembles a peacock which I shall now call the Chicken. His skin is pale, pale as in Dracula pale. I have a fleeting thought of what would happen if I tell him how pale his skin is compared to white, but I keep my mouth shut, and does the girl, Sakura. The name suits her. Add a few branches to her and she'll look exactly like a tree…with very good taste in shoes. My inner self smirks at that. Hmm, a girl in oji-san's club has been looking for the same-. Argh, bad Naruto. Very bad Naruto.

Ahem! The pink girl is Haruno Sakura and the vampire boy is Uchiha Sasuke. FYI: Haruno Sakura is not Sasuke's girlfriend, but she is the president of Sasuke's fan club. Ah, I can see the restraining orders of last year. I also happen to have the fan club's full schedule. It said so right here on page 57 of LUVSASU dot com They have meetings in the Tenth Guest Hall every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. The Saturday is more like a stake-out since they go by Sasuke's house (or wherever he may be) to find out more about him to put in their black book. They actually have a code of conducts. It doesn't say what exactly. Any personal information is only given at the members recruiting meetings, which is on Monday morning and after school. I'm starting to think this goes way beyond obsession.

The Haruno is actually the Uchiha's business partner, but I think they're at the bottom of the scale. The Uchiha is probably only using them for all it's worth. They also donate a large sum of money to the school. There wasn't more to the two than business, but Sakura wants more than that. Marriage with an Uchiha has a lot of advantage after all. Sasuke must have a lot of girl trouble.

…that's going to be fun to watch. Hey, I'm not sadistic, I just like a good time.

The girl Sakura sits down, but she keeps an eye on me. Then I notice her boyfriend looking at me. My eyes meet his. Smiling innocently at him would be bad (Sakura would think I'm gay and is flirting with him); glaring would also be bad (Sakura would think I'm threatening him). It's a complicated world. So I choose to nod my head like a half-bow and head to a further corner in the back of the room.

When I sit down, twenty-seven pair of eyes looks at me. I stare back until they move. Those brats, they make me cause too much of a ruckus on my first day! I'll need to regroup again tomorrow. Well, this is technically the first day. If rumors do spread, it'll die in less than two days. And if it doesn't, I'll just have to do it myself. (Ignore the evil laugh).

I absorb my atmosphere and discover something quite strange; the kids are too relaxed, playing spit balls and talking about toenails. It is already thirty minutes in class, so I come up with a conclusion.

The teacher tends to be late.

He arrives not too long after with a carefree nature and a lousy excuse. Sakura calls him a liar something something and class is in session (I guess that's usual too). He is a weird teacher. The turtle neck's wearing is pulled high so that it covered half of his face. His ha-wait a minute.

"Kakashi?" It is a whisper, I swear. But they have to choose that moment when I open my mouth to shut up. All heads turn to me, well, almost, only Blowtorch (dude with no eyebrows) and the Chicken ignore me. Oh, there was also Sleeping Beauty over there.

I swallow and kept my cool. Wish I could yell, "WHAT, YAH' ALL DUMPSHIT?" in their faces. But I can't. It is so hard being me.

The teacher, Kakashi, cocks his head to the side curiously. The curve of his mouth indicating he is smirking or…smiling. "Do I know you?" By the way he says it, he obviously knows me.

"Yeah, you're a regular at S7, the bar my oji-san's owns, which also happens to be an all sexual preference kind of deal and the place I call home…or try to," but I don't say that. Instead, I lie.

"O-Oh, I'm your new…student. You just…uh, didn't look like a…I mean, I just assumed." I'm very proud to say my voice fits one in distress. They absolutely buy it, because the kids start sniggering and whispering. Chicken boy actually smirks, probably thinking how stupid I am. But damnit, I'm aiming for invisible, but now I just landed myself in category: MORON. Ugh, just because I'm a natural blonde, people automatically think I'm stupid. Maybe they should lay off the fairy tales a bit. My fault, though. I should've been more prepared.

Kakashi has started flipping through his role book, and scans for a new name. "Ah, you're Uzumaki Naruto." No matter how surprised the sentence is supposed to be, he absolutely isn't. "Why don't you tell the class a little about yourself?"

Class, are you surprise as I am to hear this? Because I certainly am. It was a simple question, but his voice is teasing. Ew. He wants to see what lie I will make up so in the future he can watch out for it.

Damn that guy. He could've seen me at the bar (oji-san tends to babble) or he had a little chat with the principal. He's seriously getting on my nerves! He's trying to drop the omega bomb! The bomb being me! He's the curious type, wanting to see me as I slowly slaughter everyone. But…

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto and…"

The corner of his mouth curves up higher. He must've seen the frustrated look on my face. I'm making it so that he thinks I'm getting frustrated when in fact I am distracting him so he doesn't know that there is only two seconds until the bell rings.

One, two, ding and I am saved. Kakashi looks disappointed. I bet you now he's regretting being late. He leaves, leaving me with a quick glance. He is probably the one I'm most cautious around…until the next one comes around.

Hatake Kakashi. I knew all about him, well, at least the basics. His past records show that he was always on time, but he had recently started since about five months ago. Since he was a high-class teacher, Tsunade didn't fire him. His students also have the top grades in the course.

His mask problem had started since he was twelve. No one knows why, but there were rumors saying it had to do with his dad's death. It was listed on the front page. Turns out, Kakashi's father was a well-respected man. He had owned a small, but developing business then suicide out of shame because a problem with the thingy and the boss. Whatever. I was stumped on what to do with him. He was definitely difficult and I can't do anything until I gather some more clues.

There is definitely something going on. I am going to deal with them later. Them being the principal and oji-san. Since this is an elite school, the system will be hard to crack, but I've got my brains and undetectable skill. After I get my plans in order, I can swoop in for the kill.

Enter the Cafeteria

Holy shit. Heh, I mean what the hell. Really, it's like this place too is trying to set the monster in me loose. Geeks, punks, gothic, emo, rich, nerds, fangirls, all in one big rectangular room. I feel a need to light a fire and blow this place to kingdom come.

Shit! I duck as something sloppy; something that used to be part of an animal came flying over my head and hits the wall in a splat. I turn in the direction of where it came from and see something the color of pink pass by.


A random website tells that Sakura burned the arm of a girl because she tried to ask Sasuke out. Her parents (the ones who spoiled her) covered up the incident with money. The site was made by an unknown author. It isn't traceable, but the site has been reported to be deleted after a two week warning. Nasty bullying, but it was a common thing back at my school. However, the school was dirt poor so they could only put the kid on house arrest. After that, the kids get expelled.

A janitor comes out and cleans the mess up. The tray in my hand tips to the side a bit, but I hold it still.


Every time a mess is created, a janitor appears in a flash like somebody pushed a button for him to come out. It's awesome! No, no, no, stay on track. Some girls look at me and giggle. Either they're talking about me or they're attracted to me. I'm hoping none of them tries to confess to me. Because then I have to say no and break their hearts.

I can't help being so beautiful.

Course it's also dangerous to say no to a girl sometimes. They can become really angry by the rejection and frame you for something you didn't do. It's best to say, "Sorry, but I already have a girlfriend." And if they ask where, lie.

I know I should be interested in girls at this age, but I'm not. They're such a hassle. You have to think of them instead of just yourself. You have to remember every single day that is special to them. You have to remember their favorite food, favorite story, and so on and so on. Girlfriends are a bother to your everyday life. At least in my life. I have dated. Once. It was horrible. She (I will not name) made me pay for a movie I don't even like, food that isn't my taste, and a few toys that she had thrown out in a day. I'm not into guys either. They're about the same as girls, except more awkward and shadowy.

I am never dating again. I shall also never marry. Let someone else reproduce the earth. I'm just gonna stand on the sideline and say, "Impotent".

Now don't get any ideas.

I walk slowly so that I can look around. It's important to find the right table. Now this is actually more difficult than it looks. In the time that I'm walking, I have to find a place where I will fit so that people can leave me alone, so I have to keep a pace in my head. Also, I have to watch out for certain people, like Sakura. If I sit at their table, I will forever have to obey their every command, and I don't do any kind of slave duty. It's not like a law or anything, and it's not like I'm really going to obey them, I just don't like complications.

There's one, oh wait, Blowtorch is sitting there…all by himself. His lonely soul, may he find someone to share it with who is not me. Aha, I spot an empty table! Score! I walk over to it, but I can't look too eager. I'm almost there…just a little further.


Why am I screaming you ask? I tripped.

I tripped and landed right on top of a table that was right next to the table that I had intended to go to. Luckily my tray didn't spill or there would've been a nasty fight. It was possible. I saw someone fight over a lemon size spill. It had landed on the kid's shoes. That school had a very strict school code and that was the very first fight that had erupted since 1987. That day had been a blessing to all of us.

Right, back to my situation. I look where I had landed and hope for the best. What I saw blew my mind away!

Charlie: I know I know. A cliffhanger so early in the story. It's fun to tease you guys. Seriously, it is and...I've got nothing better to do. It is summer vacation after all. I'm not posting the usual quotes in this chapter. I'll only give two and then when the next chapter rolls around, I'll do the usual.

"All kids rebel. My way was to dye my hair half pink and half blue."

"There's not greater distance than first and second place."

That last one is true. Though I find it hard to believe that people actually go crazy over that kind of thing. Ah, it's their way of living. Please review while I go over my second chapter. Can you guys make it at least ten review? C'mon, it's only ten.