My very first Gravitation fiction! Please be kind to me!

Disclaimer: I don't won Gravitation cause if I had, Yuki & Tohma would end up together and Shuuichi would also be with Yuki… Wow…I am making Yuki having a harem! .'

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Salty pain, Salty pleasure

He staggered in to the bathroom, his blonde locks hiding the marvelous beauty of his eyes from sight. His cheeks was so flushed that it made one imagine that he has a high fever but his skin was ice cold. An ironic contrast; just like his cursed life. The life that now there was no meaning for it, there was no aim to go on.

Loosening his tie he leaned against the wall and let out a painful sob. Was he that useless? Was he that invisible? He had done every thing in his power to win his love's heart, even marrying a woman he didn't love just to be closer to him, but it was useless. He had finally fallen for another and today after so many up and downs finally there was their marriage ceremony.

"Why Eiri-San, Why?" He sobbed as he fell to his knees and tears rolled on his delicate cheeks. As soon as the name left his pink lips a wave of desire and ecstasy that was filled with sorrow washed over him. Like always the name was going to leave him breathless and helpless in agony.

He looked at his hands and then looked around with his teary jade eyes. A sharp razor blade caught his eye and he smiled sweetly as he reached out and grabbed it. He wasn't a coward but he had enough of being neglected and now that there was no chance of him being with his love, there was no reason to continue this torture.

He took of the coat of his tuxedo and rolled his sleeves up. But it wasn't enough. He was going to feel the pleasure of imagining him in his arms one last time. One last time he was going to drown himself in the desire of wanting him.

He opened his zipper and hissed as the cool air came to touch his hard manhood as he had no underwear. He grabbed it roughly, so rough that made him grit his teeth, and gave a sudden movement to it, imagining it's his hands touching him, enveloping him, pleasuring him.

"Oh Eiri-san…I love you…" He whispered constantly imagining that he was in Shuuichi Shindou's place saying wedding vows, blushing as Yuki took his hand and placing the ring in the forth finger.

It wasn't enough for him. The pleasure was great but the pain of losing was still there. So, He frowning with determination he started slashing his slender wrists…may be the bleeding make the pain easier. He slashed and jacked off. He didn't know what he was doing after some time but it gave him a sick satisfaction to see the salty red blood and the salty white semen mix with each other on the bathroom floor. It made him feel free from the prison of Eiri Yuki that he was tormenting himself in it…

And then, there came a time that he didn't have the energy to even pull up his zipper to cover his private part. He smiled and closed his eyes contently. "Shall my ghost watch over you forever Eiri-San. I love you."

He whispered and then Seguichi Tohma was no more.

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Um…how was it? Please review!