Love Conquers All
Disclaimer: I do not own GS or GSD.
This is my first AsuCaga story. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it.
Cagalli sat curled up on the bed, leaning against the headboard and looking outside the window. She was in an old and dusty cabin. She's been there hiding away from everything and everyone for a couple of days. She remembers how her father, Uzumi Nara Athha, would bring her here when she was little. This was their hideaway. Their special place. 'Oh father, how I miss you.' A tear slid down her cheek.
She lifted the bottle to her mouth, taking a swig of the Vodka she brought with her when she left the Athha Estate two nights ago. No one heard or saw her. 'I'm so sorry everyone, but I can't do this anymore.' More tears slid down her face. 'By now they are searching for me. Tomorrow morning I'll head out to the island. They won't think of looking for me there.' She pulled out a ring that was attached to her necklace. It was the one Athrun gave her. She didn't wear it, but felt it best to lay it against her heart. 'Athrun. I miss you so much. Why did you forget about me? Even if you stopped loving me, I could never stop loving you. Soon…soon I won't be so alone. I'll be with…our child.'
Almost a year has passed since he left Orb. The Council had called upon him.
"Athrun, do you really have to go?" Cagalli looked up to him, pleading, hoping, and searching for any sign that this was not true.
"Yes, Cagalli," he sighed, "I'm sorry. I wish I didn't have to."
"But why? Why now?! You've been here for months, why now demand for you to return?!"
Shortly after the war, Meyrin, her sister, Lunamaria, and Shinn returned to the PLANTs and Athrun stayed at Orb. Once again, he took the position of Alex Dino, personal bodyguard to the Representative of Orb, Cagalli Yula Athha. By day and in public, he was Alex Dino, by night and in private with only the few that were close to him, he was Athrun Zala. He hoped to rekindle whatever was lost between Cagalli and him. Only with patience and determination was he able to convince the headstrong Princess of his feelings and his intentions.
"I don't know what it is they want to discuss with me, but I do know that they expect me to meet with them the day after tomorrow. My transport will be ready to take me back to the PLANTs tomorrow morning. I already have everything packed for my departure," he whispered towards the end, making him sound defeated.
"Then I'll go with you!" Cagalli said with enthusiasm and Athrun could only smile. Inside, however, he knew better.
"You can't. You have to be here where you are needed and have many responsibilities to uphold." He knew this was going to be hard for him, but even harder for her. He saw how solemn she was and could see she was holding back the tears.
Cagalli couldn't bear the thought of him leaving again. She loved him with all her might and soul; moreover, because of that love she knew she could give him her greatest gift. The one she reserved for the one she truly and deeply loved, the one she would spend the rest of her life with. She didn't care that they weren't married. All that mattered was that they promised to be there for each other, to protect the other, and love one another. 'If all we have is tonight then I will make it unforgettable. Just the two of us. None other exists and nothing else matters.' She made her decision and was going to stick with it.
"Athrun," she reached out to caress his cheek and locked her eyes onto his beautiful emerald eyes, "at least grant me one last request before you leave?"
Athrun looked into her eyes and gave her one of his smiles that he reserved only for her. "Anything my beautiful rose wishes from me," he whispered as he ran his fingers through her hair.
"Stay with me tonight."
Athrun's eyes widened with surprise, "Are you sure? I don't…" he was silenced by Cagalli as she pressed her finger against his lips.
"Shhh. I am positive this is what I want. This is what I desire. My choice. Mine to give and you are who I choose to give myself to and no other," she seductively whispered as she ran her fingers through his silky midnight blue hair.
He grabbed her and held her tight as he crushed his lips onto hers in a passionate kiss. Soon after he started to trail kisses down to her neck as they both breathed hard and went to whisper into her ear, "then I am yours tonight." He started to nibble on her ear.
She let out a breathy mewl, "and I am yours," was her only response as they continued to embrace and kiss under the moonlight. The moon and the stars were the only witnesses to their dance, one as old as time.
Tears kept streaming down Cagalli's face and she continued to drink as she looked outside the window. She wondered how much more her body can withstand so much pain, so much heartache and so much abuse as she consumed the alcohol on a daily basis. No one knew. She hid it well from everyone, but most importantly from Kira, Lacus and Kisaka. If they found out, they would have done everything to put a stop to it. But now… now she didn't care. She knew she would only end up killing herself slowly if she continued, but then again, that was her plan, wasn't it?
The first week after Athrun's departure was hard but Athrun kept his promise to keep in touch. The Council wanted him to become a Councilman to help represent the PLANTs and to help avoid any future wars. Help maintain peace between them and the Earth Alliance as well as Orb. He, who fought in the last two wars and had formed alliances with both sides, was their best choice.
Athrun had accepted after discussing the matter with Cagalli and reassured her that nothing would change between them. Lacus believed the same as she was also a spokesperson/ambassador for the PLANTs and nothing had changed between Kira and her. Cagalli wasn't quite convinced but kept quiet to show her support. However, his phone calls and letters diminished little by little as time passed by. She understood he was busy and needed to settle in his new position, but days turned in weeks between contacts. To make things worse, he was only sending notes, no longer did she receive phone calls nor did he return hers. He would not even respond to her letters.
One day, close to two months after his departure, Cagalli was reading the newspaper to see what was happening at the PLANTs. Most importantly, what was happening with Athrun since he was mentioned quite often than not. She turns the page and there was a picture of him in his suit with a drink in one hand and Meyrin Hawke in the other. Both appeared to be quite happy. Apparently, they were at a celebration in Athrun's honor.
She felt her heart break into pieces and her life crumble apart on that day. Cagalli dropped the paper and ran to her room and locked herself in. She spend days locked in there crying, hardly sleeping, and not eating at all. Kira and Lacus were finally able to convince her to open the door and what they saw made them worry even more.
Before she would at least make an effort to eat, sleep, and to be present at meetings and appointments, now they were lucky if they were able to get her out of her room. She had fallen into a sever state of depression and they were afraid that she would end up being hospitalized. Their fear came true a month and a half later after the newspaper incident. Cagalli had not been feeling well as of late but she had not said a word. She thought it was most likely due to the lack of food and sleep. However, on this day she was found on her bed curled up into a fetal position, crying in pain and her bed sheets soaked in her own blood.
Kira and Kisaka rushed her to the hospital while Lacus was sitting in the backseat holding Cagalli. It wasn't until several hours later when she was finally placed in her own room that they found out the truth.
She was sedated and hooked up to several monitors when the doctor came in to give them the bad news. She had lost her unborn child. All three were shocked, but remained calm and composed. Cagalli will need them now more than ever. They decided to wait until she woke up to find out if they should notify Athrun. Shortly there after, Cagalli woke up and was devastated to find out she lost their unborn child. She ordered them not to say one single word to Athrun about the child or about her for that matter. Kisaka made sure no one found out the truth, that no one said a single word, and all medical documents to be sealed.
Cagalli asked to be left alone for a couple of weeks. They were all hesitant but they completely understood. Two weeks after being released from the hospital, she ventured out of her room more often but knew she was not ready to move one. Athrun was never far from her mind and wondered if she should at least let him know. He was, of course, the father of their unborn child.
For weeks she debated with herself if she should tell Athrun or not. She hadn't had any contact with him for some time, but finally decided she couldn't keep it a secret any longer. Unfortunately, during this time, she developed a bad habit. She began to drink at night when she was alone and everyone else was asleep. This was her way to help her fall asleep, especially on the nights that were the hardest for her. This was her secret to keep.
When she finally told the others that she decided to tell Athrun about the miscarriage, they were thrilled to see her more motivated. They all supported her and gave her all the help she needed to reach Athrun. Weeks passed by with no avail. They tried everything; in addition, Lacus traveled back to the PLANTs to meet with him in person, but was unsuccessful. All this time, Cagalli managed to sneak in more bottles of alcohol into her room unnoticed by all of them. She started drinking more at nights to drown out her pain. But things got worst when she finally received a letter form Athrun after being away for six and a half months. He had said in his letter to put a stop on all communications to him, he was a busy man and had no time for her at all and that it was best to sever their relationship at once.
Cagalli was in a daze, she couldn't believe what had happened. She kept asking herself why this was happening and what made him change his mind. She received her answer to all her questions a week later when she noticed the others were hiding something from her. At first, they were very hesitant to say anything, but finally broke down their resolve and decided to show her. There, in front of her, was the front page of the newspaper with another picture of Athrun and Meyrin. However, what got her attention was the bold heading "Is There a Mrs. Athrun Zala in the Near Future?"
Her world went black after reading that statement. After she awoke in her room alone, she started to cry her heart out, wanting to drown her sorrows, but knew she couldn't. Someone was bound to come in and check-up on her. She hated herself, hated to make everyone else worry about her, but at the same time, she both hated and loved the man that put her through the heartache and turmoil. She wanted to disappear. Needed to disappear. She needed her child.
Cagalli started to formulate a plan. No longer will she be a burden to anyone and the faster she disappeared, the faster they can return to their own lives.
It took weeks to prepare everything and to gather up what she needed. No one suspected anything nor did they ever realize that she would drink herself to sleep every night. Finally, ten and a half months after Athrun left, Cagalli was ready to disappear. It was two in the morning when she took one final look around her room. The note was on her bed and she had her knapsack with her that contained her disguise and other necessities for her trip. Not once did she look back when she left the estate for she knew she would end up changing her mind and return. But she couldn't do that, she couldn't continue living the way she was day in and day out and most importantly, she couldn't continue being a burden.
Now she finds herself alone in her family's cabin, looking outside as she continued to cry.
'Tomorrow I will arrive at my final destination.'
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