You Know You're Not In Love When…
Summary: Draco Malfoy makes a very interesting list one day, denying the love for a certain brown haired witch.
A/N: I was inspired to write this when I was reading "You Know You Live In 2006 When…". Ideas immediately popped in my head and ten minutes later, I had written this list.
can't stop thinking about her. You even dream about her. Somebody saw ew.
2. You're starting to find that wild hair a tiny bit sexy (like those crazy Amazon woman you hear the Muggles obsessing about). You secretly want to run your fingers through her hair, but think again, wondering if you'll even get them out.
verbally stopped comparing her voice to a banshee. Weasel has officially taken that place when Potty spilled pumpkin juice on his pants the day before yesterday.
4. You don't send a hex towards Potty and Weasel's direction in the corridors because she's there, standing beside them. Besides, what if you miss? You don't want to dream about a pimply face all night.
5. You're civil to house-elves when you go steal food from the kitchens, refraining from commanding them chase after Dobby with their wooden spoons.
6. You don't call her a Mudblood.
7. You start to stutter like an idiot every time she talks to you (which 99.9 of the time is never).
8. You like to imagine how perfectly her small hands fit yours.
9. You even try and smile and wave at that oaf Hagrid when he's feeding some ugly beast his bloody dinner (when no was looking of course). Then you pointedly stick out the middle finger when he asks you to help feed a new born Hippogriff.
10. You don't purposely step on the ugly orange fur ball or send hexes when it's walking alone, but look away as if the cat's existence is as interesting as the dirty beneath your shoes.
11. You stare at her at the corner of your eye everyday at lunch.
13. You start to notice how nice her complexion is.
14 You wish that you were sitting beside her in every class.
15. You forgot to write 12.
12. Now you've written number 12.
16. You fantasize about stabbing Weasel in the eye several times with your quill every time he looks down her shirt.
17. You wish you could see down her shirt but binoculars are too damn noticeable.
wish that her skirt wasn't so damn long. You silently command the weather to bring in a nice breeze through the hallways, just to lift that skirt a little bit.
19. You even try to understand the confusing Muggle device called the felly phone, but you quickly give up because no matter how many times you throw it at the wall, the beeping noise never stops.
20. You read through all the reasons you just wrote and wonder if you should change the title at all.
21. You finally decide that you shouldn't because you are not in love.