I don't own RGB (But I wish I did because it'd jolly well be out on DVD by now) that honour belongs to Sony/Columbia.

Think of this story as the deleted scene from the episode "The Cabinet of Calamari" written by Mark Edens and Michael Edens. It explains the reason why Egon conveniently had a hairpin in his pocket in one scene. I adapted some of the episode as a way of setting the stage.

Viva Janine and Egon's romance! Got it?!


The Mystery of Egon's Hairpin

By JECrazy.

The Ghostbusters had been invited by Mister Magic himself to The Magic Theatre to watch The Great Calamari perform his magic show.

Calamari had nearly died when the Chinese water torture chamber trick had gone wrong, due to the sudden appearance of a mysterious ghost.

Mister Magic had asked the Ghostbusters to investigate despite Calamari's claims that he could handle it.

Naturally Doctor Peter Venkman had thought Calamari's blonde assistant Vana was very beautiful, especially as she'd washed up right into his lap during the failed performance, and he wanted to get to know her better. But they had a job to do.

The ghost they'd been chasing all around the theatre was elusive and even when they'd managed to trap him he'd escaped from the trap. Believing the trap to be defective, they'd tried trapping him a second time using another trap, even going to the trouble of wrapping a chain and padlock around the trap, but he'd still broken free somehow.

After escaping for the second time the ghost had fled and the Ghostbusters had given chase. He'd led them to Calamari's dressing room backstage which they were all now standing in, appearing bewildered that the ghost had disappeared again.

Doctor Raymond Stantz waved his PKE meter about. It whined and bleeped in the direction of a large trunk in the middle of the room. "That trunk's giving off a reading," Ray announced and put the meter away.

Winston Zeddemore, Doctor Egon Spengler and Venkman gathered around it and watched as the occultist knelt down and tried in vain to open it. "It's locked," he lamented and thumped the lock with frustration, as if that would open it.

Intending to pick the lock Ray turned around to his Ghostbusting cohorts and said, "I don't suppose any of you have a hairpin."

Ray, Winston and Peter were stunned when Egon of all people declared, "I do." With a look of complete innocence he fished a hairpin out of his pocket and threw it to Ray, who easily caught it.

Ray fiddled with the lock and hairpin but the lock still wouldn't budge.

An impatient Peter moaned, "Ray I'm late for my date with Vana. Can you hurry up?"

Ray was a tad annoyed. "This is too important to rush, Peter." He grunted as he tried to unlock the damn stubborn thing.

Venkman rolled his eyes. He lowered the power setting on his proton gun and zapped the lock. The trunk immediately swung open.

"Whoa!" Ray yelled and leapt back. He turned to look at Venkman, surprised that his old friend would do that with him so close to the lock.

Peter smiled, smugly. "You were saying?"

Egon and Winston started rifling the trunk and threw everything they were finding over their shoulders. Their search wasn't turning up anything helpful.

Disappointed Egon said, "There's only a bunch of old theatre posters in here."

Ray scowled at Peter as the psychologist left the room with a wave of his hand and a sarcastic, "Great!"

Ray turned his attention back to the task at hand as Egon surmised, "There could be a false bottom." Egon found something interesting at last... four different advertisements featuring magicians who looked an awful lot like Calamari. He read the names on three of them out loud. "The Great Spamoni. The Great Linguine. Antipasto The Magnificent."

"Jeez, he can't hold a job can he?" Ray commented.

Winston, looking at yet another poster, agreed, "He can't even hold a name." He rolled the poster back up and discarded it. His stomach growled. "Is anybody hungry?" he asked, hoping they'd say yes so they could get something to eat. Apparently the suspicious magician's stage names, which sounded like food were giving him hunger pangs.

Holding up a very old newspaper Egon said, "Look at this."

Ray and Winston peered closer at the article Egon showed them. It was entitled "Magician jailed after unexplained disappearance" and had a picture of Calamari accompanying it.

Egon told Winston and Ray in brief what the article said, "The Great Spamoni asked an audience member to participate in his cabinet of mystery routine." Egon then pointed at a photo of the volunteer, a man who appeared to be in his forties. "The volunteer was never seen again," Egon said with a grave voice.

"I knew there was something fishy about Calamari," Winston stated triumphantly, clenching his fist.

Ray, still irritated with Venkman, said, "C'mon let's go get Peter," as the three Ghostbusters left Calamari's dressing room, "He'll be headed to Vana's dressing room."

Egon with his longer legs was striding in front of Ray and Winston.

They were all anxious to solve this ever deepening mystery, but there was another mystery Winston and Ray had to know the answer to and only Egon could solve it for them: Just what on Earth was Egon doing with a hairpin in his pocket anyway?

Ray and Winston gossiped and giggled behind Egon's back about it.

The sharp physicist heard them and he turned around wondering what was going on. "What's the matter with you two?" he asked, glowering and crossed his arms.

"Well," Ray said, trying to suppress a smile, "We were just discussing the fact that we know your secret." He held up the hairpin and pointed to Egon's well coiffed blond hair.

Egon lunged forward and grabbed the hairpin with indignation. "I'll have you know..." he began, stuffing it back into his pocket, "That it doesn't belong to me. It's Ja-" he stopped and clamped a hand over his big mouth, realising what he'd nearly said.

Too late!

Ray's eyes widened with shock and Winston's dark face took on an amused expression.

Smiling, Winston pointed at Egon. "You were about to say it's Janine's weren't you?"

Egon stiffened. "I was not!" he protested, eyes rapidly darting back and forth.

"Oh c'mon, Egon!" Ray cried. "Who's is it then? Peter's?"

Egon grimaced. "Yearghh! How could you even suggest such a thing, Raymond?!" Then he relented, "Alright. Okay. It is Janine's hairpin," he admitted, "So what?"

Winston wasn't going to let him off the hook that easily, he pressed on with the interrogation. "Admit it Homeboy," he said, raising an eyebrow, "You've been indulging in a little hanky panky with our spunky secretary and have been keeping it a secret. Haven't you?"

"I have not!" he protested again. He blushed slightly and gulped at the very thought of being intimate with Janine, despite his fierce attraction to her. "For your information," he fixed his baby blues strongly on Ray and Winston, "I found it today on the backseat of Ecto-1. I... I merely forgot I'd put it in my pocket until Ray asked for one." He adjusted his glasses when they slipped from the sweat that had appeared on his face.

Winston and Ray shared a furtive "Backseat of Ecto-1 today, aye?" glance.

"Suuurrreee!" they said in unison, not quite believing what he'd told them, no matter how serious he looked and sounded.

They finally burst out laughing, not being able to hold it back any longer. This was more fun than any old magic show.

Egon simply turned around with his nose held high in the air and started stalking the backstage area of The Magic Theatre again. He called back over his shoulder to his snickering friends with a haughty, "Gentlemen, if you've finished having your laugh, I suggest we get back to finding Peter."

"Yes sir!" Ray and Winston shouted back when they'd finally managed to cease their highly amused guffawing.

Yet they continued smiling, as they wiped tears of laughter out of their eyes. It was very easy to tease Egon about Janine, because they knew how deeply he cared about, or possibly even loved, her and how sensitive he was when it came to implications that they were more than just friends.

Egon was still well aware of their ongoing entertainment at his expense and he realised with dread that they were probably going to inform Peter about the whole thing later too.

He groaned inwardly, he was never going to live this one down...

Ende