Princess Peach's Creepy Beachhouse

By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus

Old Introduction Author Note from Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: Yes, I'm doing a small horror/parody tribute to one of my favorite games of all time, the Gamecube classic "Luigi's Mansion", except replace Luigi with Peach, Professor E. Gadd with Captain Falcon, replace cute little Toad with Pichu, and...the others make a cameo, but instead of Mario being rescued, it's Marth who gets rescued. And the chief villain is actually based on Dracula (Mewtwo) instead of King Boo, as it also derives from the Spooky proportion of Conker's Bad Fur Day (which, by the way, is the only M-rated connection to this story). Other than that, enjoy this wonderful (and horrifying) parody of one of gaming's now beloved games, Princess Peach's Creepy Beachhouse! (Don't let the name fool you - it's actually a conspiracy to back up the true horrifying natures of this fanfic, which is why it'll be rated K+ for now, but might later be bumped to T)

New Introduction Author Note from Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: Yeah, I decided to revive this old fanfic in the form of a Mario fanfic, with my hatred for Super Smash Brothers going into overdrive. Anyway, I have reworked this story a bit to make it much better, and the only Nintendo characters that will appear in this story that are NOT from mario are Captain Falcon (as he was decided to permanently stay in, despite the switch to the Mario section from the Super Smash Brothers section) and Mewtwo, an old fan favorite Pokemon from the first generation (given that I decide to use him for the Dracula bit based off Conker's Bad Fur Day, which I am currently debating with myself on). Toad will still appear in the role that he was in from Luigi's Mansion, and with mario himself taking back the spot of being kidnapped from Marth (who, ironically, replaced Mario in that role, hence the irony). But yes, although he will have awesomeness all over him, Captain Douglas Jay Falcon will still retain the role of Professor Elvin Gadd, and it's very, very obvious who's spot Princess Peach is taking as the lead heroine. Anyway, that's all I have to blabber about. Read, enjoy, and have fun with the newly awakened, re-mastered fanfic, ladies and gentlemen! Good night!


It was a peaceful night in the Mushroom Kingdom, within the capital of Toad Town at the beautiful flagship castle owned by Princess Peach Toadstool. Everyone was sleeping peacefully in their beds. Not a noise in the house, not even a mouse. But oddly enough, there was someone awake, and that person happened to be the plucky blonde Princess Peach Toadstool, reading a letter on the big red couch in the Living Room.

"This looks interesting," Peach said to herself, looking both ways to see if anyone as there, and then looking at the letter, "Dear Princess Peach Toadstool, congratulations! You have won a brand new beachhouse, but in order to claim it, you have to go there first, because, well...it's a secret. Just go there, because there's delicious vanilla cake with sweet, sugary frosting. Yummy, yummy, yummy for your tummy, tummy, tummy! Sighed, the Ridiculous Prize Committee."

Peach gasped. A beachhouse, for her? This was the most exciting thing since she got her own castle, but a BEACHHOUSE...now that was something Peach can look up to. But, she didn't want to go there right away, so instead, she decided to send Mario, her true love and loving boyfriend, there.

"And I just know how to get him to do it..." Peach said to herself, giggling evilly as she took out a feather and headed up to Mario's special room, knocking on his door. "Oh Mario, honey..."

Mario woke up, getting out of his bed. "I'm-a coming, I'm coming," The red capped Italian plumber muttered crankily, with a yawn as he opened the door. "Oh, what do you want, Peach?"

Peach crossed her arms together. "Well...there's this awesome beachhouse I won, and...I want you to go there and check it out for me!" She said, smiling.

Mario stared at Peach. "Yeah, right," He said gruffly, heading back to bed and slamming the door on Peach.

Peach stood there for a few seconds, and she then started banging on the door. "MARTY-O!! PLEASE, I BEG YOU!!"

"No! Absolutely not" Mario shouted back in protest as he placed the bed sheets over him, adding angrily, "AND MY NAME ISN'T MARTY-O!! It's MARIO!!"

Peach stopped banging, and she fell on her knees, beginning to sob. "I'll...sniffle...I'll cry!" She then covered her face with her hands and started crying obnoxiously loud, enough to wake up a sleeping elephant fifteen miles away.

Mario smirked as he closed his eyes. "Nice try, Princess Peach, but I'm the reat Super Mario, and I am not falling for that!" He shouted, as he started to snore loudly.

Peach then started to cry louder, waterfalls coming out of her eyes instead of tears. the whole castle due to this testimony began to shake, causing all of the resident mushroom retainers to scream as they were shaken out of their beds and onto the floors..

Mario placed the pillow on his head, growling as Peach's crying became louder and louder by the minute. After a few minutes, he screamed, and got out of bed. "FINE!" He opened the door, grabbed Peach, pulled her up, and slapped her across the face. He growled, his face very cranky. "I'll go check your stupid beachhouse, but you leave me alone for good, all right?" The red-capped Italian plumber snapped, his face red from anger.

Peach nodded, rubbing her sore cheek. "Yeah..." She smiled a bit, watching Mario change out of his pajamas into his regular red-and-blue overalls and heading downstairs, opening the main entrance doors and slamming them both as he started walking down the dirt-pavedpath.

Peach went downstairs, and she looked at the door, smiling. "Well, at least he's checking it out for me." She said to herself. The door then started knocking, and Peach opened it, Marth standing in front of her.

"Do you know where the beachhouse is?" Mario asked, gritting his teeth stupidly like a donkey as he adjusted his red cap.

Peach shook her head. "Nope!" She slammed the door in Mario's face, and started walking to the couch, when she noticed a map on the letter. "Ohhh..." She remembered, picking up the letter and opening the door. "Hey Mario, sweety, here's the ma-" She looked down, noticing the unconscious Mario. She sweatdropped and giggled. "Oopsie..."

Mario got back up, growling as he rubbed his head injury. "Oh for crying out-a loud... give me the friggin' map," He hissed, snatching it from Peach and looking at it. "All right, so it's this way..." He started walking down the path in the western direction.

Peach waved to Mario as she watched his walk into the horizon. "Bye, Mario! Be sure to come back in the morning!" She shouted, going back inside and closing the door.