Napoleon 4:Napoleon Is Dead
A/N: First of all, I love Napoleon Dynamite and I sleep with a Napoleon stuffed animal so I decided I'll kill someone off if they're not going IS MY FIRST SHRIZEK FANFICTION!Evil Andy is the property of THE PETE PETERSON EXPERIENCE Use him without permission and I'll have the Fanfiction administration gut you. You shitkickers. Turn back if you can't handle really really Really really really really really gory stories.
Napoleon Dynamite and Pedro were at the school.
"We gotta find Ricardo's locker. We need those action figures." Napoleon said in a Nerd accent.
"Uh, Amigo. I need to tell you something."Pedro said.
"Save it for later Pedro. We need to find the magic wizard and the door."
"Sorry Amigo, this can't wait. but I got to go away. Far away." Pedro said.
"Pedro! You honkey!" Napoleon screamed at Pedro ,Pedro jogged away.
He saw a Liger in the sky charging towards them.
"WHat?!" Napoleon said.
A Liger bit Napoleon.
"Ow.." Napoleon said."You frickin' bit me. Gosh."He groveled in pain on the ground.
"AHAHAHHA!" Evil Inspector Andy said as he got out of his Liger.
"Who are you? What're you doing here?" Napoleon asked, mildly scared.
"What the fuck do you know my inner rage and pain and suffering, wanker?"
"I asked you first." Napoleon added.
"You dumbass nerd motherfucker." Andy said as he took out a switchblade and threw it at Napoleon. He cut off Napoleon's ears.
"OW!" Napoleon screamed as blood gushed from his ears."YOU CUT OFF MY FUCKING EARS! GOSH! THAT FRICKING HURT!"
"Hey geek-stink-breath, go breathe on yourself." Any said. He took out a saw and cut off Napoleon's fingers on the bloody arm.
"Oh God." Napoleon said as he looked at his lacerated fingers. Andy started to chuckle.
"Funny, I didn't think you believed in God." Andy said. "I just thought nerds woshipped pagan Gods such as Gollum."Napoleon fell back to the ground. Andy took out an ax.
"Any last words Napoleon?"
"Yeah, fuck you." Napoleon said, He didn't say much more as his head was decapitated by the ax. Blood spewed out of his corpse. Andy got in the liger and took the liger destroyed Headless Napoleon's body. His body was torn up like a meat in a blender. Deb and Kip came rushing to the graveyard.
"Where's Napoleon? she asked Andy.
"Your looking at his remains."
Deb looked at the ground and saw pieces of Napoleon everywhere not to mention his decapitated head.
"You bastard." she said.
"Thank you. Andy said as went on the Liger and flew away.
"Well that sucks." Kip said.
The next day a small funeral was held for Napoleon. Everyone was there except for Napoleon who buried,
"I'm sad about what happened to the Napoleon." Pedro said after the funeral.
"Why did you do it Pedro?" Uncle Rico asked.
"Do what?" Pedro asked.
"Abandon Napoleon. Why did you do it?"
"Listen here, I didn't have a choice. He was going to kill me. Now, tell me, Amigo, if someone was gonna kill you, you would abandon your best friend to save, yourself, right?" Pedro said angrily. But Uncle Rico didn't have an answer. He just stared off into the sun.