Disclaimer: I shall never own Blood+. (sob)
Kaori knows the boundary lines, though Saya has never been very clear about them.
She thinks sometimes that even Saya herself isn't sure of what she wants, so she usually bases her actions solely off the other girl's reaction, or lack of—a touch here, a kiss there, trying to figure out what makes her shiver just a little, what makes her react at all—and always tries to keep the boundary lines in mind.
In the past the boundary line was loose and free and Saya caved much more easily, because back then all Kaori had to do was smirk a certain way just to get her squirming before leaning forward and kissing her, light and gentle, and everything was simple because Saya responded, Saya reacted.
But the Saya that has returned to Okinawa is different from the Saya that left, and Kaori knows the boundary lines are much more fragile now because Saya has a wisdom in her eyes, a predatory gleam that wasn't there before, and it makes Kaori a little nervous about treading close.
This, she decides one day, is the difference between Mao and Saya. With Mao, Kaori has never been a leader. Mao is demanding and pushy and she knows what she wants, and she takes it mercilessly and without apology. Her hands bruise and her mouth is hot and fast, taking everything Kaori offers greedily and then taking even more, and Kaori just lets the tide drag her under when the heat becomes too much, because with Mao she never leads, only follows.
Mao wants Kai, and since she can't have him, she takes her frustration out on Kaori.
Saya is different. With Saya, Kaori is usually the leader because Saya doesn't seem to know her own emotions at times, so it's usually up to Kaori to push the boundary line and see how far she can go to see if Saya will react or respond, before she reaches that unspoken boundary line and is forced to withdraw. She still doesn't know all of Saya's weak points, and they always seem to change, but when she finds them—nipping her ear one day, kissing her neck the next, it always changes—Saya responds, and unlike Mao her hands are gentle, her mouth is cool and slow.
But that was the past, and the present has Kaori feeling apprehensive, because she does not know this Saya, does not know her weak points or her boundary lines, and the last thing she wants to do is ruin their friendship.
She isn't quite sure if what they have anymore is even friendship, or a friendship that strayed a little too far.
She keeps herself fiercely in check, and it drives her insane. At school, during the day, she is polite to Saya and they laugh and talk like they used to, and at night she gazes at her ceiling and remembers the feeling of gentle hands, cool but not cold, and lips that coaxed rather than demanded.
Kaori would take Saya over Mao any day of the week, but she's not about to admit it.
And then one warm day something snaps. She distinctly hears it in her head, like a warning bell, and she knows it's not something inside of her that's snapped, but something inside of Saya, and she can't explain how she knows.
She leaves school early that day, abandoning her book bag under a tree and easily climbing the fence, heading for the quiet hill just outside of town that was a favorite haunt of Saya's before she left.
Saya is already there, and briefly Kaori wonders if she's waiting; finally, she steps out of the trees and says her name softly, shivering inwardly as her eyes focus on her.
Her eyes are dark and swirling, like a storm about to break, and as she walks to her Kaori instinctively stiffens, because she's seen that same look in Mao's eyes and deep down it kind of scares her. A small tremor runs down her spine before she closes her eyes. She thinks she knows what's going to happen next, and as Saya's hand rests on the back of her neck she braces for the heat and the fury.
Saya's eyes are like Mao's, all angry and torn and broken up inside; but her kiss is still the same, still soft and gentle and kind of lazy, and gently she kneads the back of Kaori's neck to relax her.
Kaori turns to water in her hands, because really she knows that even back then she was never the leader; she just coaxed Saya into responding before stepping back. It was never Saya's boundary lines she tested, but her own, because she was never brave enough to be a leader.
Some part of her knows that Saya has changed, because the Saya of the past was never this skilled, but Kaori doesn't mind because the sensations feel nice. Saya nips lightly on Kaori's bottom lip to get her to open to her, and she bleeds a bit, but the dark-haired girl runs her tongue over her lip and the pleasure and pain mix.
Saya breaks away first, and keeping her hand on the back of Kaori's neck she trails a chain of kisses down her throat, cool and fast. Kaori tilts her head back and loses herself, because she knows Saya needs this again, for whatever reason, and she's willing to offer what she has.
And maybe, just maybe, it will be enough.
Saya leads. Kaori follows.
Later that day they return to Omoro's, but unfortunately hiding the evidence has never been their strong point, because Kaori's hair is a little messier than it should be and Saya's bow is a tad lopsided, and she gives Lewis a crooked smile when he gapes.
Kai promptly throws up his hands and declares he doesn't want to know. Kaori blushes while Saya laughs, and things feel normal.
At least, as normal as they can be.
It's almost midnight when Kaori is roused from slumber by a gentle tapping on her window, and she nearly has a heart attack when she sees Saya gazing back at her through the glass. She unlocks it and slides it open, and the other girl slips inside, mumbling something about not being able to sleep.
Saya's blushing darkly, because she's never done this before, and Kaori thinks it's cute.
They're both grateful that tomorrow is Saturday, and Kaori's parents are out for the weekend. No one will ask questions.
Kaori knows something is bothering her friend, but she doesn't ask as Saya settles next to her, snuggling almost instinctively. Her breathing is soft and even, her breath warm against Kaori's throat and her hand fisted lightly over Kaori's heart.
She realizes there in the dark with her friend asleep beside her that there have never been any real boundary lines—they've always offered what they have to each other, and been taken willingly.
That, she realizes, is the other difference between Saya and Mao.
Mao only comes to Kaori when she's hurting, when she's been rejected and needs to vent and work off some steam. Saya always comes to Kaori for no real apparent reason, and she never needs to vent or work off anything.
Perhaps the Saya that has returned to Okinawa really isn't different from the Saya that left.
And Kaori knows now that she can tread as close as she likes. Saya will never try to stop her.
Please don't take this too seriously. I was just bored, KaorixSaya happens to be my fav Blood+ ship and MaoxKaori has always been a consideration as a crack ship.
Read and review, please!