Days after it happened, Dean was back to being Dean. If I happened to mention the fact that he sold his soul for me, at first he would simply glare at me in that oh so very Dean way, a warning to drop the subject or suffer the consequences. It's not that I couldn't handle said consequences, but I understood. A week or so later, I began to bring it up again, hoping maybe now it would have all sunk in. No, he would smile, look me in the eye, and say "Sam, it'll all work out, it alway does." or "Sam, don't worry about it." or "Sam, quit your bitching!". The last remark usually made me laugh, but this was no laughing matter. My brother only had a year to live and it was my fault. What made it worse, was the Dean was in denial about his own mortality.