Okay! This will be a collection of 12 unrelated drabbles/fics, in which Ichigo is in some way tortured, according to a given theme. There will be crack, angst and porn. Aren't you all excited? XDDD

This was written, as is told by the title, for the 12 Days of Ichigo Torture Challenge over at the IchiRuki Community on LiveJournal. (Thank you to the mods for arranging such an awesome fest!) Therefore, if there is a pairing, you can expect it to be IchiRuki.

Since all 12 fics have already been written, there should be no problem with updating. Operative word being SHOULD. Since this is Sahara Storm, who tends to update Once Every When She Remembers, there prolly will be lags in updates. Sorry. Feel free to give me a little poke if I don't update in three days or more, kay? (((:

I don't think I have anything else to say, so… let's get started!

Title: And Then You Have To Bring It Up

Fandom: Bleach

Pairing: Ichigo/Rukia

Rating: PG

Word Count: 484

Summary/Description: Ichigo is… flummoxed. Rukia is angry. This is all Ichigo's fault. Because Rukia says so.

Warning/Spoilers: A little language, nothing much.

A/N: Day 1: Gulit Trip. LOL, looking at the other entries for today, I think I'm the only one who went for the lulz as opposed to the angst. XD

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.

"You're an asshole and I HATE YOU." It was said in… anger, to be ridiculously euphemistic.

Ichigo sidled his eyes to the side, not quite knowing what to say.

"Um. Sorry."

"Sorry isn't ENOUGH, you ingrate, you lummox, you –" Rukia heaved harshly, sweat pouring down her face. "You bastard." Her hand held his hard enough to break bone.

"Err," offered Ichigo, a tad helplessly.

"You know, this is ALL YOUR FAULT," Rukia continued, gasping heavily. "And don't give me any nonsense about it being a joint effort, something that we both contributed to; it's YOUR FAULT." She ground her teeth; Ichigo swore he could hear it. "You degenerate fool. I HATE YOU."

Ichigo glanced heavenward, then at the skull attached to his waist, hoping for some Hollow to start terrorising Karakura Town NOW. Where had his plump, rosy, pleasant-faced and only slightly hostile wife of only five hours ago gone anyway?

He wasn't given long to think about it; his father came up behind him and blindsided him with a kick to the jaw that had him flying across the room.

Instead of stars, he saw red-eyed cherubs shooting daggers at him.

When he next looked over, Isshin was clasping Rukia's hands.

"Oh, Masaki!" he lamented. "Where did I go wrong in raising our son that he would bring our dear new daughter such pain?" Tears streamed down his rugged face. "I am ashamed. ASHAMED, I SAY!"

Ichigo started to roll his eyes, but stopped at a look from Rukia.

"Get over here!" she snapped. "You should be holding my bloody hand!"

Ichigo blamed his excellent reflexes for the fact that he was over at her side in two seconds flat.

"This is all your fault, you moron," she saw fit to remind him again.

"Breathe, Rukia-chan, breathe," Isshin reminded her after glaring at his son.

She complied, then took a swing at Ichigo, who was luckily able to dodge by the breadth of a hair. He looked extremely harried.

"I apologised," he muttered beneath his breath. "Not that I see why I have to."

"Not that you see why you have to?!" Rukia fairly shrieked. "IF I WERE NOT IN SEVERE PAIN I WOULD—AUGH." She cut herself off with a guttural groan, face contorted in pain. Ichigo watched in horror, and felt his fingers go numb.

"Kurosaki-san," said Rukia weakly, when she could manage, "they're… they're getting worse."

"It's okay, my daughter, just breathe," Isshin crooned soothingly, and punched his son in the face. "Yuzu, you can start bringing in the water and towels now!"

Ichigo massaged his face as best as he could with one hand. His brows knitted together in frustration.

"I thought this was supposed to be a happy time in a man's life."

"SHUT UP," Rukia snarled, and took a deep breath. "Just remember: this is all your fault. I AM NEVER HAVING SEX WITH YOU AGAIN."

A/N: Haha. :)

Love to hear your comments.