He looked down at her stone. "Alina Marie Hardy 1985-2007" he sighed. He came here everyday. And still couldn't make sense of her death. He missed her so much, it hurt. Eveynight he would stay awake almost hoping it wasn't real, and that she would walk through their bedroom door saying, "Sorry I got caught in traffic on the way home from work." but that would never happen. He remembered every single moment he ever had with her. Every word she spoke, every face she made, he couldn't forget her laugh if someone paid him.
He laid another daisy he had picked on the way there on top of the one he laid yesterday. He sighed and began to walk away, and began to remember, as he always did.
He was walking through the aisle's of the CD store. It seemed like endless music. And he loved it. He was halfway down his third or fourth aisle when he bumped into someone nearly toppling over onto the floor.
He looked down, brushing a piece of his unruly hair from his vision. A girl. A girl stocking shelves was kneeling on the floor and he didn't see her as he was walking, he nearly killed himself.
"I'm sorry." she said standing up stretching her legs and brushing a piece of hair behind her ears, only to have it fall back in her face. "My boss told me to move from here because someone was going to trip over me.." she trailed off blushing. He grinned at her. "No, it's fine I wasn't looking where I was going. I was really caught up in the amount of selection in here.." he said looking at her. She was a little shorter then him he would classify her as the perfect height. She had shoulder length choppy red and black hair. Her blue eyes looked like swimming pools, she had lined her eyes carefully with a sparkling black eyeshadow, and wore perfect black rimmed glasses. She had on jeans, with a star-studded belt that didn't look like it helped hold her pants up. And, a blue tanktop, that was showing the tip top of the lace of her bra. He smiled at her.
"Yeah, we're one of the best CD places in the state." she said awkwardly. He smiled at her. They stood there a few moments silent, shifting their weight from one foot to the other. He cleared his throat, and she inspected how many cd's she had left in her hands. "So uh.." she started. And he blurted it out. "Let me take you out for some coffee tonight." he said smiling.
Her face turned into an awkward one, she opened her mouth slightly to say something, and her eyes got wide. "Uhh..I don't think so." she said beginning to walk away from him, fast. He sighed and followed her. "Why?" he said following her as she tried to lose him in the store. "Because, I don't know you..I'm not going to go out with you.." she said turning to look at him. He grinned at her, she was afraid of him. He looked down at the keys hanging around her neck spotting her car key. "Well now I know you drive a Pontiac, and if you say no I might have to wait for you by your car.." he said laughing slightly.
"But you don't know what kind, or color." she retorted turning away from him stocking more CD's. "Come on." he said flashing her another smile. "Don't make me follow you out." his accent causing a soft smile to play at her lips. She sighed. "Fine. There's a Starbucks near here. I'll drive, because I don't trust you." she said honestly. He nodded. "That's fine, I walked here, my hotel is across the street kind of." She made a strange face at him. "What do you live there or something?" he almost laughed out oud right in her face.
"You're who?" she asked as she got resituated in her chair and took another sip of her creative coffee drink he ordered for her. "Jeff Hardy?" she said cluelessly. She shrugged. "I don't know." he laughed. "You seriously don't know me?" he asked suspiciously. "No, seriously. I don't watch TV really, and the only wrestlers I know of are like, John Cena, Batista, and DX because that's what they have in the window at Spencers." she said pulling her top up.
"Well, I'm glad you let me take you out." he said his door open, his one foot out on the concrete in front of the Hilton. "Yeah, me too. I enjoyed it." she said honestly. He smiled at her. "Do you think you could give me your number? We're going to be in town a little while longer and I'd like to spend more time with you.." he said handing her his cell phone for her to punch in her number. "Yeah, I'd like that." she said.
He stood behind the curtain, waiting for his music to play. And it did, he made his entrance, dancing and jumping around as usual. Everyone was cheering for him, but he was looking for her. He made his way down the ramp slapping random hands and making his way to the ring. He came around to the steps and spotted her. She was in the very front row. He turned his head and made sure he smiled directly at her, a smile which she returned.
They had been dating for almost a year now. And he loved her more then anything, or anyone he had ever known. And he knew she felt the same. He looked over at her every few minutes during his match, making sure she was having fun. He didn't want to inconvenience her. He was so happy with her. She was cool with all of his traveling "Everyone has to make a living, Jeff. And absence makes the heart grow fonder." she would tell him.
He won his match. And went back up the ramp, waiting for RAW to be over. He told security to bring her backstage when it was done. "You did good out there." she said standing in the doorway of his lockeroom. She was wearing a pair of ripped up jeans, and a black tanktop. She could be wearing a garbage bag and he would still think she was beautiful.
"Yeah, you think?" he said standing up zipping up his hoddie he slipped on over his wifebeater. "I was sort of distracted, there was this beautiful girl in the audience and I couldn't stop looking at her.." he said walking over to her leaning his forehead against hers. "Really?" she said leaning up their lips meeting. He made an 'mmm' sound against her lips.
"Come on Ali, let's go back to the hotel." he said clicking off the lights in his lockeroom and shutting the door. He was glad he decided to bring her on the road for these few weeks.
"Are you sure I look okay?" she asked for the millionth time pulling down the sun-visor checking her face in the light up mirror. He smiled at her from the drivers seat. "I told you a million times, you look fantastic. And I'm not telling you again." he said reaching over placing his hand on her thigh. She looked over and smiled at him. He was taking her to meet his brother, someone who she had heard a lot about, and his brother the same about her.
She sighed and shifted in her seat looking out the window. "Alina, Stop it. Everything is going to be fine." he said almost annoyed at her reaction. He pulled onto a familiar street, and finally pulled into the driveway. It of course, was his home too. But his brother lived with him. They got out of the car and Jeff unlocked the large wooden front door and let her step in first.
"Matt!" he yelled up the winding staircase near the front door. Footsteps came to the edge of the stairs. "Jeff?" he called. "I'm home." he said back. Her heart began to race as she heard him grow closer to the base of the stairs where Jeff was standing with her.
She had seen pictures of his before. And seen him on tv once or twice, and even spoke to him on the phone a few times but she had never been face to face with him. He reached the bottom of the steps, and the resemblance between the two was hauntingly similar. They both had the same type of unruly long hair, while Matt's was more conservative, Jeff's looked like crayola threw up on him.
"Obviously, I'm Matt." he said pulling her into a hug. "It's great to finally meet you." he added. "You too." she said looking over at Jeff, who was practically beaming at their immediate friendlyness.
They ate dinner together that night, Matt and Alina wouldn't stop talking. Jeff's face almost hurt from smiling so broadly. He was so insanely happy with this girl, and even more happy that she and his brother got along. He could definitely deal with more dinners like this.
"Promise me you'll keep your eyes closed." he said almost sounding like a child. She could have sworn she heard the faint sound of the ocean. She sighed annoyed. "I promise." she said. He wanted this to be so perfect. He was leaving in a few days for a month or two and he wanted to leave her in a complete state of happiness.
He slowly removed his hands from her eyes, which were clenched tightly closed. He laughed at her appearance. "Am I gonna open my eyes and I'm gonna get killed or something?" she said laughing feeling around for him. He rolled his eyes, and looked around making sure they were perfectly positioned. He needed this to go perfect. "Okay, open your eyes." he said.
She did. They were on a pier, positioned direcrtly in front of the sunset. The ocean waves lazily splashing against the wooden legs of the pier. "This is beautiful." she said looking in front of her expecting him to be there. But he wasn't at eye level with her, he was down on one knee. Her eyes welled with tears as he pulled a small box out of his pocket and opened it up. Her heart nearly stopped when she saw the ring staring back at her. "Alina-" he said looking up into her eyes. His hair was blowing in the perfect direction away from his face, his green eyes were sparklng at her, and his accent was going to make her melt. "You are the first person in my life that makes me genuinely happy all the time, every single second of every single day. And I want to spend the rest of my days with you." he said watching the tears roll down her cheeks. "Alina, will you marry me?" he asked. "Oh god, Yes! Of course Jeff!" she shreiked. He slipped the ring onto her finger and stood up to kiss her. He was so incredibly happy with this girl, he couldn't picture being with anybody else. Ever.
His phone was vibrating. He was so exhausted. He reached into his pocket as he walked down the hallway with a few other guys towards his hotel room.
"Hey baby." he said into the phone, he knew it was her.
"Hey babyyy." a few of the guys remarked at him. They weren't engaged, or in love, they didn't know. Most of them were just sleeping around too selfish to get tied down.
"Hey." she said, about to explode.
"What's going on? Is everything alright?" he asked concerned. She never called him, she waited for him to call.
"I have to tell you something. And you have to promise not to blow my eardrums out." she said, a broad smile across her face. She stood in the center of their apartment clutching her necklace around her neck.
"Okay, I promise." he said confused. He had no idea what was coming next.
"I'm PREGNANT!!!" she shreiked into the phone.
"WHAT?!" he asked his excitement causing him to almost combust.
He stopped walking abrubtly and held the phone away from his ear to scream into the long hallway "WE'RE PREGNANT!!" the guys he was walking with congradulated him. And his life couldn't have been any better.
"Oh my god I can't believe this! When did you find out?" he asked her as he let himself into his hotel room.
"Today, before. My period is late, and its usually nothing but I just had to know.." she said excited.
"Oh god, we're going to have a baby." he said. "I love you so much Alina." he said laying down on his bed.
"I love you too, Jeff."
"You may now kiss the bride." he announced. Their lips crashed together in a sweet short kiss. They turned to face their families. Most were crying, the rest were smiling broadly. They turned to eachother and smiled. They finally got married. They were finally married. Mr. and Mrs. Hardy.
The reception was perfect. She had planned every single detail down to every what-if. This day went perfect for her, for him, for everyone. They made their speeches, and shoved cake in eachothers faces. Cried, laughed, danced. And had the best night of their lives.
They went to sleep that night, of course after making love their first time as a married couple, happy. Both of them knew, this was the happiest day of their lives, and many more of them would be spent together.
"I'm so in love with you, Mrs. Hardy." he said trailing his fingertips along her stomach.
"I'm so in love with you, Mr. Hardy," she responded in a giggle turning her head and kissing him.
He unlocked the front door to their apartment, and went straight to the bedroom where he had left her. She was 4 months pregnant now, her belly growing every day.
He found her lying there on the bed where he left her, peacefully sleeping. He couldn't bring himself to wake her, she was up almost all night every night. She sent him to the store to get food, to meet her every strange craving. He placed the shopping bag on the floor near the bed. He threw a small throw-blanket they kept at the foot of the bed on top of her and crawled underneath it with her.
He had fallen asleep just as quickly as she did. Within minutes they were both snoring. Their nap lasted quite some time before she woke him up with her whimpering.
"What's wrong? What's going on?" he asked slightly nervous, was she having the baby? It was way too early.
"I don't know..I don't know, but it hurts." she said her face twisting into a painful one. "It hurts so bad.." she said, tears beginning to slide down her cheeks. He sat straight up on bed, and slipped on his shoes and found her a pair of flip flops. "Come on." he said walking over to her side of the bed and gently picking her up. She was 4 months pregnant, but still light enough for him to carry her to the car.
He sat in a chair in the waiting room his head in his hands. His leg shaking up and down from his nervousness. He heard another door close and in front of him were a set of shoes. He lifted his eyes and stood up, a doctor. "Good evening Mr. Hardy." the doctor said shaking his hand. Jeff returned the shake without a smile. "I know, you've been out here for a long time. And I realize it's late." he began. "I'm sorry that we kept you out here waiting for so long. But I have good news and bad news." he said gesturing for Jeff to sit. "The good news is, you're wife is fine." But then he remembered, the baby. The doctors face softened, and fell. "But I'm afraid, she lost the baby." Jeff wasn't even aware of the tears he was shedding.
"How?" he asked. The doctor shook his head. "We're not sure, we're going to run some more tests, but you can go in and see her if you'd like."
He had to admit, part of him wanted to run. He had just lost his baby. He was going to have an offspring. Part of him didn't want to walk into her room and have to meet her eyes. He didn't want to have to see her suffer, he almost wished, this had never happened.
But a larger part of him forced him to flush those thoughts out, he was a man. And it was time to be one. He had to take care of his wife.
She stood in the foyer of the empty house, staring up at the ceiling. "This is the one." she said walking up the stairs running her hand over the railing. He smiled at her, a smile she returned. It was one of the few he had seen since they had lost the baby.
He turned to the realtor standing next to him holding out a wad of paperwork. She sat down on one of the steps. She wasn't sure why Jeff was buying them a house, sure they were married but their family hadn't gotten any bigger. And this place had plenty of room to hold a family, a family they didn't have.
She so badly wanted to be happy, to be as happy as she was before. She wished everything was better, but it wasn't. She couldn't help but feel terrible she lost her baby, something that was growing inside HER, died.
She was ripped out of her thoughts by his voice. "Are you POSITIVE this is it Ali?" he asked holding one final paper and a pen. She nodded at him. He signed his name.
They were living here now, as a family.
"Hey, I'm gonna go run to the store." he said looking at his wife. She had been laid up on the couch laetly. He could tell she was depressed. And he was trying his absolute hardest to just make her smile.
"Okay." she said not even looking at him. He sighed. "Alina." he said.
Her eyes met his. She smiled at him, a real genuine one. "I love you, Jeff. More than anything. And I'm sorry I've been this way lately.." she trailed off.
He shook his head and pressed his lips against hers. "No, baby. This is a hard time for the both of us, I just wish you'd talk sometimes." he said taking her hand into his.
She smiled again. "Want anything from the store?" he asked her kissing her forehead brushing a piece of hair behind her ear.
"No I'm alright. Thanks for asking." she said looking into his eyes.
"Alright, I'll be back in a little." he said picking up his car keys from the table.
"Be careful, I love you." she said before he walked out the door.
She knew this was it, it had to be now.
He came home about a half hour later. He had gone to the store for junk food, his brother had told him junk food usually made women feel better. He wasn't trying to make her forget their baby but he didn't want her to be closed up like this forever.
He walked into the living rooma after he put all bags on the kitchen counter. "I'm back baby." he said. She wasn't there.
He looked through their sliding glass doors into the backyard and still couldn't spot her. Where had she gone? He called her name throughout the house, no answer.
He walked into their bedroom. Maybe she was taking a nap. Nothing.
Her car was still in the driveway, her keys still on the table. And her shoes near the front door. He was beginning to get worred. He knocked on their bathroom door, no answer. He pushed it open slowly. He found her.
"Oh God, Oh god, Alina, Alina!" he was practically screaming at the top of his lungs, he stepped into the bathtub, and pulled her out. She was still wearing her clothes. He didn't see any blood. What the hell had she done?
"ALINA!" he was shouting. He had her propped up against the side of the tub, her eyes closed, her breathing barely there. He looked around the bathroom and didn't spot anything that could have been the culprit. He blinked back the tears forming in his eyes and picked up her lifeless body. He was talking to her the entire way down the stairs, to the foyer where he called an ambulance.
He sat in the waiting room his leg bouncing up and down. They had rushed her into the emergency room. She was barely conscious. He didn't know what was going to happen.
He remembered sitting here once before. The doctor came out and told him their baby had died.
His vision was blurred, he couldn't even hear. Speaking was out of his grasp, he was just waiting for his brother to show up. It wouldn't be right this second but he needed someone. His best friend was in a room nearby dieing.
Nurses ran in and out, for hours. Jeff stayed put right where he was. He didn't know what he was going to do if he lost another person in his life.
Finally, after about 3 or 4 hours of him sitting there a doctor walked up to him. Jeff raised his puffy green eyes to his, he had such a look of sadness. He knew it was going to be bad.
"Mr. Hardy" she doctor said shaking his hand. He took a deep breath preparing for the worst.
"I'm so sorry. But your wife has passed." he said looking anywhere but at Jeff's eyes.
"She overdosed. She was extremely depressed, and her hormones were raging. She was pregnant at the time of her death." he said making eye contact with him.
"She was barely pregnant, but still." he added. "I'm so sorry for your losses." he stated before placing a stack of papers in front of him.
"Fill these out whenever you're ready." he said before shooting him another sad look and walking away.
He crossed the street, and walked into their house.
He sighed looking up at their old master bedroom. He often left the doors closed, he moved into another room. Leaving theirs untouched.
She had passed away almost a year ago, and he still left the room exactly as it was when he had left her home alone that day. He wondered, if he had stayed home what would have been the result of them.
He sighed as he pushed open their door. He walked over to the still unmade bed and laid on her side, taking in her scent that was still on the pillow. He smiled to himself, he could almost feel her there next to him holding him like she used too.
A few tears began to fall onto her pillow, he thought about it. She was unhappy here, he hoped and prayed everynight that she was happier wherever she was now.
He thought about it a little while before smiling to himself, he knew she was. She just had to be.