Disclaimer: I don't own FF of KH, nor any of the characters within. I'm not sure if Baby Today is a real magazine title, but if it is, it doesn't belong to me. Nor do I own Wal-Mart, McDonald's, Monopoly, NCIS/Gibbs, Impala, X-Men, Rand McNally, U-Haul, Prius, Suburban, Dora the Explorer, Holiday Inn, Texaco

A/N: Wow... I owe you guys an apology, huh? I haven't updated since July. I started this on May 8, so I know it probably isn't going to be DONE until, what…July?! My bad… hahaha.

^The above AN was started forever ago, and I guessed I would finish in July of '09........It's March 27... I am not even going to waste your time explaining. Just know that I am truly sorry that I am so lazy/slow/etc, and I hope that those of you who read this to begin with are still interested in it, though I would totally understand if you don't even remember what this story is about.


Cloud and Sephiroth stood silently at the end of the long countertop, watching with some shame as Reno made a fool of himself in front of the receptionist. Cloud had asked Sephiroth if he would accompany him that morning to pick up as rental car, as someone would have to drive the other car back. They had passed Reno on the way out of the apartment, who had claimed that he "knew the car guys," and had brought it upon himself to tag along. They'd followed his directions to what seemed to be the farthest possible dealership in a shady part of town, only for the redhead to question out loud if this was even the right one. Fortunately for them, the redhead had recognized the busted cement parking block and the bullet proof windows, and proudly announced that they were, indeed, in the right place.

"Yea, I rent a lot of cars…a lot. All the time, really. I guess you could say that I'm a regular car rental connoisseur." Reno was oozing 'his charm' as he leaned on the counter while Sephiroth and Cloud tried to separate themselves further. The white haired man pondered picking up one of the offered magazines, but decided that "Baby Today" wouldn't help his image. Besides, infants made him nervous.

The woman behind the desk seemed to be doing her best not to press the silent alarm button beneath her desk, though her fingers were having a difficult time staying away from it. She really wished that people would stop showing up to rent vehicles while they were intoxicated.

"Let me just go get the boss, okay Sir?" The girl nervously rolled her chair away from the computer and stood, making her way to a door a little ways down. When she was out of sight, Reno turned to his reluctant companions, giving them a thumbs up.

"See guys? I told you, I am here for you. Me and this guy go way back. I'll be surprised if he even lets you pay a dime for one of these shit-fests."

"Shit-fests?" Cloud and Sephiroth looked up, finding not at all what they had expected from the manager of a rental vehicle shop. Surely four foot ponytails and eye patches were in violation of some form of dress code. The two fair-haired men shared a disbelieving and exasperated look before turning their judgmental gazes to Reno, who seemed to be trying to take back what he'd said.

"You know what I mean, man. I've never seen a nice rental car before."

"Probably because he only comes to this hellhole…" Cloud muttered the comment under his breath to Sephiroth, who gave a quiet huff of laughter.

The grey and black haired man spared his secretive critics a mild look, and found that he did not recognize the two men in the least, which was fortunate. This probably meant that they did not recognize him, either. He really had no idea why he had had to go around the town introducing himself to the community as a recently released felon. It made transition into society so much more difficult. He shrugged to himself, figuring that it would not do to dwell on such distant topics when prospective business was knocking at his door.

"Good morning, gentlemen, please forgive my vulgarity. I assume you are acquaintances of Mr. Sinclair? For which you also have my apologies, by the way. The name is Xigbar. What can I do for you boys?"

Cloud raised an eyebrow at the immediate shift in the man's attitude. He had gone from hang-loose, foulmouthed man who looked as though he were about to put the beat down on Reno to smooth-talking businessman. It was quite possible that they were dealing with a sociopath.

He shook it off, though, deciding that if they were dealing with some sort of weirdo he may as well be a paying customer. It seemed less likely to get him stabbed than walking out of here like without a word.

"Yes, sir. We're just looking for a car. Nothing fancy, just something to get about four of us from point A to point B for the next week or so."

Xigbar brought a hand to his chin, leaning his hip against the counter while he surveyed the group. His eye fell on Reno, mirth written clearly in them.

"Your friends don't give me a lot to work with."

Cloud looked mildly offended while Reno just gave a short laugh. Xigbar turned his attention back to the blond, intent on pulling information from the youth. He truly was a decent businessman who wanted to give his clients what they were seeking. Usually, anyway.

Raising his hands before him, Xigbar splayed them as he spoke, seeming to rely more on his motions that anything else to convey his thoughts. Cloud was instantly relieved that he hadn't brought Zack, as the dark haired man would have felt compelled to mimic the man, and probably gotten them murdered.

"When you say "A to B," do you mean, say…Home to Wal-Mart? Because I have plenty of those. Perhaps Florida to…the Mason Dixon? Got a few. Here to Alaska? It'd be a tight run, but we may manage it. If you mean here to Australia, I must admit, I haven't solved this problem yet. May I suggest air travel? I can get you tickets for cheap, if you don't mind dodging security checkpoints."

Sephiroth continued to stand in silence, watching the animated man ramble on about A's and B's, black-market airline passes and Australia-related issues, trying to sort out where he had seen the man before. He looked incredibly familiar, though he was unable to place him. He didn't worry about listening to the man any further, as he doubted staying "in the know" here mattered. As far as he was notified, he was just expected to drive one of the vehicles back home. With any luck, this place wouldn't require him to show a driver's license of any sort before leaving the lot. Only three people knew why his license was revoked, and he planned on keeping it that way. He was confident Leon wouldn't bring it up, and he doubted Judge Kühl or Officer Geiger would expose his secret to the American boys anytime soon.

Thinking about his revoked license and Officer Geiger brought back memories of his recent overnight stay in the Escambia County jail. What a shitty time that had been. There was something just on the edge of his brain, though, thinking about that place and looking at the man now asking Cloud a multitude of questions on "what do you desire from a vehicle?" It didn't seem to be coming to him, and so he filed that thought away for later deliberation, deciding now may be a decent time to start paying attention. Reno had finally stopped staring at the ceiling, so he imagined the transaction was nearly over.

"Well boys, I think I have the perfect for you. She's one of my favorites-I'd be lying if I said I never took her home once in a blue moon." The word 'autophile' passed through Sephiroth's mind, but he tried to let it go. Cloud was nodding along dumbly, clearly exhausted and confused by the alarmingly energetic salesman.

Reno gave a lazy smile, resting his arm on the counter and narrowly avoiding knocking the potted plant down with his elbow.


"See, I told you X-Man would take care of you."

Reno was making his way back to Cloud's car, though the blond did not share his ease at the moment. They had walked out of the establishment without signing a damned thing, flashing any form of ID, and the only money that had been slapped down was a $10 bill and a peel off game piece to a McDonald's Monopoly contest Cloud had found in the bottom of his wallet. Not only that, but Sephiroth had pointed out that the latest certificate for salesmanship hanging on the wall was dated '05. In short, there wasn't a single thing that seemed legal about the whole ordeal.

Cloud followed Reno back over to the car, raising a hand to block the bright sun from his sensitive eyes. He had a bad feeling that whatever Xigbar was about to "pull around front" wasn't going to be street legal. He cast a glance over to Sephiroth, who had remained by the shaded store front. The pale haired man appeared bored, though somewhat curious as to what they were about to see. The blond sighed and decided that he wouldn't make any hasty judgments. Though he did feel it was best not to have high expectations.

Cloud heard the faint sound of an engine being started from around the corner, and blew out a short huff of breath, faintly impressed that he didn't hear any form of mechanical protest- the car seemed to have had no issues starting. That was a good thing. He still wasn't certain that this was going to go over well, though. The blond was distracted from his thoughts of impending disappointment as he watched Reno knock on the thick glass of the store front. The redhead was trying his best to get the attention of the desk clerk, though the girl was doing an admirable job of pretending not to notice the obnoxious man. Reno had his hands cupped on the glass with his face pressed against it, trying to see through the strong reflection. Sephiroth sneered at the attention-starved man and evacuated the store front, seemingly intent on putting a good twenty feet between him and the other. The clouds blocking the sun had moved on, and the brightness of the area had increased drastically, giving the men outside no visibility of the inside any longer. Cloud watched Reno hiss in disappointment, and he was considering offering words of sympathy when he felt a presence at his right.

"You zon't really vant me to ride in zat?" Cloud quirked an eyebrow at Sephiroth inquiry, following the man's gaze to the silver Impala that was rolling towards them. The blond made an impressed face to himself, having expected far worse than this.

"What's wrong with an Impala? It's better than that, right?" Cloud gestured briefly to one of the police cars parked in the shopping center parking lot across the street. Green eyes rolled, clearly not amused.

"Quite. I think I am done vith ze back seats of zose." Sephiroth regarded the squad car with malice for a moment longer before returning his attention to the vehicle that had just parked next to their car.

"Zat car only hass three doors…"

That got Cloud's interest, and the blond discreetly craned to view the other side of the Impala without Xigbar noticing. Unfortunately, discretion had never been one of Cloud's stronger qualities.

"I see you are admiring my handiwork, boy!" The approaching rental salesman grinned widely, brandishing the keys in his right hand, swinging them around one skilled finger.

"When I got a hold of her, she'd seen better days. The whole right rear had been in one hell of a doozy. Couldn't even open the damn door. So I ripped 'er off, and I welded a piece of sheet metal on 'er, repainted her and kaboom! She looks like new! Runs great, too."

Sephiroth made what may have been a humored noise, and Cloud did his best to retain his calm composure at the story, wondering how safe a welded sheet of metal could be. That had to zero out the crash-rating warranty. He watched Sephiroth circle the vehicle, jade eyes eyeing it in cynicism. Cloud and Xigbar observed as the silver haired man came to the right side of the car, inspecting where the back door should have been.

Sephiroth traced a finger along the barely noticeable raised line of the metal. He would have been impressed with the work, had he not realized that this car was probably a total death-trap.

"Whatya think?"

Sephiroth's eyes went to Xigbar at the question, and then to Cloud, who gave him a look plainly reading 'Please don't be rude. This man might murder us.'

Thin lips pulled back in an unsure smile and Sephiroth looked back at the dread-locked man, raising his fingers to knock against the welding work.


Cloud nearly seized when Xigbar's heavy hand slapped him on the back before locking around his right arm and pulling him tightly against the taller man.

"Hear that? Your friend there says 'Kaboom.' I think we've found the car for you. I knew you'd like it!"

The blond smiled nervously and gently released himself from the bizarre man's hold, looking around for Reno, seeing him leaned against the far side of the building enjoying a smoke break. He really wanted to get the hell out of this place as soon as possible.

"Well, we thank you very much, sir. We'll take great care of the Impala. We will have it back to you in a week, if you're sure that's okay."

The grey and black haired man raised a dismissive hand.

"Fine, fine. I trust you boys. Besides. If you don't bring her back at some point, I'll know where to find you."

Blue eyes grew in paranoia, not quite sure how to respond do that. Part of him wanted to know how the man would find them. The other half just wanted to assume the man meant Reno and go about his life happily. Sephiroth seemed to be regarding the man in suspicion as well- he swore that he'd seen this man before, if only he could remember where…

"Reno! Come on! We're leaving now!" Cloud turned to Xigbar after successfully hailing the redhead.

"Again, sir. Thank you very much."

The man gave a wide smile and handed the keys to Cloud, though the blond quickly tossed them to Sephiroth.

"All right, Seph. Just follow me home. Reno can ride with you if you want, in case we get separated."

Sephiroth watched as the redhead balanced on the parking block, waving goodbye to the receptionist inside the building.

"I think I vill take my chances alone."

Cloud smiled, wondering if it was for the best that Reno rode with him. Sephiroth didn't need any added distractions if he was already driving what was quite possibly an instrument of death. Plus, should the vehicle combust, they should probably endanger as few people as possible. Cloud would have volunteered to drive the new car himself, were he and Zack not the only people capable of driving their own car. The little Ford was one gear off, so if you wanted to drive, you needed to be in "first," and if you wanted to park you had to be in reverse. He figured it was safer to just let Sephiroth take his chances in the Impala. At least that probably had insurance.


Sephiroth was quite relieved when he pulled into the apartment complex parking lot. He had never been so nervous in his life as he was during the last twenty minutes. In order to keep from losing Cloud and getting lost forever in Nowhere-Florida, he had run about three red lights, one of which he was almost certain the cop had watched happen. He didn't know just by what grace of God had kept him from being pulled over and immediately arrested and/or deported, but he was grateful. He wished that the blond would have been a bit more considerate. It really wasn't hard to stop a little early when you saw the yellow light.

Climbing out of the car, Sephiroth glared at the shorter blond, who gave him an apologetic smile.

"Sorry. The yellow lights are lucky."

A silver brow arched in question, not at all impressed with the excuse.

"So how did it run?"

Sephiroth eyed the hunk of steel beside him, surprised that it wasn't billowing smoke or leaking vast amounts of oil after running for so long. Actually, the vehicle hadn't given him a single issue, if you ignored that the radio didn't turn off. He shrugged as he brushed past Cloud, walking towards the entrance of the stairwell.

"It vas fine. I learned a lot from Mister Foxvorthy. I think zat Zock might be a…redneck? Ja. I think zat Zack might be a redneck."

Reno gave a loud laugh and caught up with Sephiroth easily, joining him on the stairs.


Cloud stood frozen in shock and disgust, watching from the lot as the two men disappeared around the corner. He knew that they were supposed to teach the boys American culture, but he was fairly certain that this wasn't what the school had meant by that. The blond gave a heavy sigh, trying to ignore the fact that what had just occurred was awfully funny when you thought about it. He wondered if Sephiroth would bring up his discovery with Zack. He was sure that the dark haired boy would find some amusement in it. He shook his head before beginning to climb the stairs. He would have to smack Reno for saying 'Git-R-Done' when he got a hold of him. And he was going to smack him hard.


The living room had become a battlefield. The mood was tense and heavy as Zack and Leon squared off against their most worthy opponent to date. Together, they circled their adversary, keeping it under their intense scrutiny, making sure it knew they were watching it, that it knew that they hated it, and that it knew that they would know if it tried anything funny. The fucker was going to get it, that was for sure- after all, it had drawn first blood.

"Okay, Leonhart. I know you're wounded and weary…" Zack spoke to Leon in a somber, authoritative voice, though not in such a way that he was speaking down to his comrade.

At the mention of his wound, Leon eyed his swollen finger angrily, allowing it to feed his rage and increase his determination.

"Cloud will totally be hot over that battle scar anyway. But if we ever want to see our fair maidens again, we have to take care of this bastard. I know my last couple of plans didn't work, but…I think I've solved the problem. We are going to close that goddamn suitcase, or I swear to God, I will give up my quest to bed your cousin."

"Zen by all means, I vish you only ze most humiliating of failures."

Shocked out of his "Army Man" persona, Zack spun around to see Sephiroth and Reno standing in the doorway, clearly confused why the other two men were having so much trouble with something so simple. Cloud wasn't far behind them, pushing his way through the pair to take in the scene.

"You almost done?" The blond seemed content to ignore what Zack and Leon were doing as he made his way into the bedrooms, giving each one a hum of approval.

"Yea!" Zack yelled to his friend while making his way to the junk drawer in the kitchen, rummaging though it and retrieving a gnarly looking pair of pliers.

"All we've got left is this last suitcase. Then we're all good."

Zack approached his brother in arms, coming to stand side to side with the chocolate haired man.

"All right, buddy. Since you're already injured, we'll switch jobs. You use these on the zipper, and I'll try and keep the seam clear."

Leon took the pliers and worked his way through what he believed the plan to be. He and Zack were usually on a similar wave length, fortunately for them, so he was moderately confident in what he was to do.

Sephiroth and Reno watched the pair work together, Zack shoving his hand into the baggage and keeping clothing from snagging while Leon latched onto the zipper and dragged it roughly around until it was fully sealed. Somehow, the two men observing had been expecting something far more epic. Green eyes regarded each other in mild disappointment before Reno shrugged and Sephiroth shook his head, turning his attention to his cousin.

"I hurt my finger." Leon spoke first, offering out his irritated and swollen index finger.

"I got it stuck in the zipper. It only bled for ten minutes. Luckily one of your silk shirts was there to catch the blood. I would have hated to ruin the carpet."

Sephiroth glared at the finger, smacking it away and ignoring the hurt and hateful look it earned him. Reno gave an obnoxious laugh. The redhead didn't understand, but he enjoyed seeing a good slap once in a while.

"Why are you packing?"

Leon looked at the suitcase, his expression one of distrust and confusion.

"I don' t know. Zack said we were going to the beach, but…last time we went, we didn't pack shit."

Sephiroth eyed his cousin, perplexed, before looking to Cloud, who had just come out of the bathroom with Zack, the both of them shoving various personal hygiene products into a bag. Sephiroth really did not know why the beach would require their toothbrushes, two sets of shampoo, and quite so many sticks of deodorant. Perhaps the last item was water resistant?

"So ve are going back to ze beach?"

Cloud and Zack looked up like a pair of deer in the head lights, frozen for a moment before sharing a glance between one another. Sephiroth didn't like this.

"Yea! Figured we would take you guys out to the beach for the week, that's why we're bringing all of this stuff." Zack gave his quick and dismissive answer, dropping the bag he'd been toting by the door.

"We're heading out in about twenty minutes, so if there's anything you can think of that Leon didn't grab for you, I suggest getting it now."

Sephiroth looked at Leon, unsure how he felt about the brunet handling his personal possessions, and less confident in the man's ability to pack on his behalf for a week-long endeavor.

"Did you get my brush?"

"Yes. And the rest of your hair shit."

"Did you get the pair of pants that I like?"

"Yes. And the pair that you like just a bit less but will wear them 'every now and then to break up the monotony.' Trust me. I know you, and I know all of the weird things you have to surround yourself with to be comfortable. I got everything."

The silver haired man was still far from convinced. While Leon was accurate in his claim of knowing him, Sephiroth also knew Leon.

"Are you positive?"

Grey eyes rolled in irritation. Leon wasn't sure how many ways he could tell his idiot cousin the same thing before the other man understood. For someone who claimed to be as smart as Sephiroth did, you would imagine he would have better comprehension skills.

"I got the things you would have forgotten."

It was Sephiroth's time to roll his eyes. Reno, Zack, and Cloud, meanwhile, and gathered themselves on the couch to watch the two men have their little discussion.

"I don't forget things."

The brunet gave a wide smile, shaking his head at this cousin's denial.

"Oh yea? Where's your cell phone?"

Sephiroth crossed his long arms across his chest, his narrowed eyes falling to the floor. He had no idea where his cell phone was. Somewhere at home in Germany. On his night stand? In the living room? He had certainly forgotten to pack it before making the long flight here, that was for sure.

"…Mother requested that I leave it at home. She knows how you like to steal it to make expensive calls. And where is yours?"

Leon stared smugly back at this dishonest cousin, knowing good and well that Sephiroth had no idea where he left his phone. Leon was much different from his forgetful cousin. He knew exactly where his phone was.

"On Delta flight 838, window seat 2G."

The two regarded each other, Sephiroth in deep consideration of abandoning his cousin forever, and Leon in the 'victory' of their latest face-off.

Cloud checked his watch, pleased that they were actually running a bit ahead of schedule. It would be nice if it could stay that way.

"If you guys have everything…it wouldn't hurt if we left a little early?"

All men present, excluding Reno, nodded in agreement, though Leon and Sephiroth were suspicious. It was nine in the morning. The beach was, going on memory, about twenty minutes away. Where they in danger of missing the water?

Gathering all of their bags, Sephiroth paused in the threshold, casting a look to Leon over his shoulder.

"You packed underwear, right?"



Things were definitely not adding up. Leon and Sephiroth were seated in the back of the Impala-On-Loan, muttering to each other in secrecy as Cloud and Zack did the same up front. The blond had volunteered that he would drive first, and had offered the passenger seat to Leon. The brunet had respectfully declined, deciding that, given the fishy situation, he would feel much safer in the back with his cousin. He was pleased with his decision, despite having to sit on the side of the car that didn't have a door. Every once in a while he would eye the welded plate of metal, not liking the hollow noise it made when the group hit a pothole.

"We have been in the car for an hour and a half."

"I know. I don't like this."

Leon squirmed in his seat, reaching behind himself to lower the headrest, displeased when the entire thing popped of in his hands.

"Why did we have to rent a car to go to the beach?"

"I don't know…" Sephiroth reached to take the headrest from Leon, leaning over to slide it back into place, moving over in his seat to be closer to his brunet cousin.

From the front seat, Zack and Cloud pretended not to watch the exchange, knowing very well that the pair in the back were suspicious of them, but unwilling to admit anything.

"Excuse me, but vat beach is it dat ve vill be visiting today?"

Violent and blue eyes snapped to the rearview mirror, both saying the first beach to come to mind.

"Orange Beach!"


Cloud regarded Zack in horror, his eyes widening at Zack's ridiculous answer.

"Malibu!?" the blond hissed, eyeing Zack with a poisonous look.

"What?! They don't know where it is!"

"Eh?" Both men fell silent from their argument, and Zack turned in his seat to eye a waiting Sephiroth, finding the site that met him adorable. Sephiroth and Leon were seated side by side, so close to each other that it couldn't possibly be comfortable.

From the driver's seat, a very nervous Cloud watched Zack smack his own forehead in an over-played show of self-depreciation.

"Bah! Silly me, Malibu?" He gave a loud and false laugh. "I meant Orange Beach, like Cloud says. Don't listen to me." Zack gave them a winning smile, and when the men in the back made no protest, he turned back in his seat, facing the front.

As Zack and Cloud hastily found renewed interest in the road ahead of them, bright green met stormy grey, conspiracy resonating from both sets of eyes. Sephiroth made a subtle glance into the storage pocket on the pack of Cloud's seat and found it to be empty, much to his disappointment. He felt a quick knock on the side of his leg, and looked to Leon, who raised his chin, motioning to the front of the vehicle. There, on the dash of the car, rested what Sephiroth had been after.

"Good work. But how?" Sephiroth eyed his cousin and the map, hoping that the younger man had an answer to his question. He could think of no possible way to acquire the map without the men up front noticing.

"I could fake a heart attack. I'm sure they wouldn't notice you grabbing the map while we swerve off of a cliff, and fall to our fiery deaths."

Sephiroth glared at Leon, though his younger cousin appeared quite amused by the scenario in his head. The brunet had never been the greatest road trip companion in Sephiroth's opinion. The paler man shook his head, looking away from Leon, who was now eyeing him apologetically, clearly unsure of how to get the map into their possession.

"Just ask for it. It's not like he'd tell you 'no.' I know! Blow him for it!"

Resisting the urge to throttle the man, Sephiroth did find some value in Leon's suggestion. He supposed he could just ask for it.

"May I see za map, please? Squall doss not belief zat Florida is next to…eh..Abutoda? Aku-…roku-llama?"

Zack leaned forward, nearly biting his tongue clean off as he tried not to laugh too hysterically. It would not do to utterly insult the man who so generously sucked him off on a regular basis. Cloud eyed the snorting, quivering mess next to him while simultaneously trying to keep the car in the correct lane, attempting to understand what in the hell Sephiroth was saying.

"I'm sorry…What?"

"Did you just speak Farsi? Or was that Arabic? I could never tell them apart."

"I have to fucking idea what I just tried to say." Sephiroth looked a little disturbed at himself, not sure what had just passed through his lips.

"What state is next to Florida?"

Leon shrugged, and looked to Cloud. The blond was still looking at Sephiroth through the rearview in extreme concentration, clearly trying to work his way through whatever his cousin had just said.

"ALABAMA! YOU MEANT 'ALABAMA!'" Zack had righted himself in his seat and was now wide eyed and turned around, looking at Sephiroth, though his eyes were still bleary from his fit of laughter. He took a shaky breath, trying to calm himself enough to speak at a normal volume.

"Alabama is next to Florida. On top of it, actually. Sort of. So is Georgia, but I think you meant Alabama. Don't worry, I got your back, babe."

Sephiroth was less than pleased at the reaction, though he was grateful that someone had understood what he was trying to orally convey.

"Ja. Alabama. Map."

Cloud was still staring numbly at Sephiroth, though his lips were pulled back in dismay. He didn't seem willing to believe that that was what the man had actually said. It was too far off. He nodded dully, not breaking his confused gaze as he reaching to the dashboard, his hand blindly bumping around until he found the Rand McNally.

Sephiroth continued his staring contest, waiting for Cloud to say something about this deformed English, only looking away when the blond mindlessly offered him the map. Sephiroth considered suggesting that the blond take a peek at the road, though when the car half merged onto the shoulder, Cloud took the message and resumed his responsibilities.

"…Akurokulamma…" Cloud shook his head, avoiding Sephiroth's sharp, angry glare to contemplate just how cut out he was for hosting foreign students. He had to hand it to Zack- he would have never, in a million years, guessed "Alabama." The raven haired man was still giggling in the seat next to him. Cloud doubted the man even noticed how close they were to scraping the car on the large cement blocks lining the construction-burdened highway.

In the back seat, things were much more mentally involved. The cousins were jammed into the corner of the car, as far out of sight as they could manage, seated tightly together with the map spread out on their knees. Nimble fingers worked their way from the words "Orange Beach" to "Pensacola." Leon eyed Sephiroth in confusion, pointing again to Orange Beach. Sephiroth eyed it darkly, looking past Leon to the window, only for his eyes to meet the welded-steel plate. They should have picked his side of the car for this project, though that would have put them in Zack's sights. He huffed, craning to see through the windshield, finding a sign. The sign quickly proved his suspicions correct; they were not heading west. Orange Beach was in Alabama, to the west.

"We're going east."

Leon looked around the car, suddenly much more alert. Sephiroth seemed on-edge now, as well.

"Are they going to murder us, and leave our bodies somewhere far from your Middle Eastern city? Is that why they rented the car? So that our blood wouldn't be found in their trunk? Is that why Reno smiled at us when we left? Because he knew? Is he formulating an alibi for them now?"

Sephiroth ignored the jab at his butchered pronunciation of the neighboring state, and gave his cousin a serious look. That's when it hit him. He knew why he had recognized the man who'd loaned them the Impala. He had seen him the night he'd been in jail- the Cyclopes had been filling out paperwork for his release before the policemen had removed his handcuffs and allowed him to leave. Was it truly a coincidence that they would receive a $10 vehicle from a criminal?

He and Leon had been watching far too many episodes of NCIS lately, and Leon's scenario had just become very, very plausible.

"I don't know."

Where the hell was Special Agent Gibbs when you needed him?


They had been in the car for a little over three hours, and Cloud wasn't sure if he could will himself to drive for much longer. Not only was he getting sleepy, he was also beginning to feel guilty and nervous about the constant mistrustful glares he was receiving from the duo in the back. Sephiroth and Leon had been particularly antsy in the last hour, and Cloud wasn't sure how much longer he was going to be able to keep the charade running. They were supposed to be going to the beach, but as Sephiroth had pointed out, they hadn't seen a single body of salt water since the bridge 200 miles ago. He could understand why the Germans would be wary of the situation. If nothing else, he could expect them to be a little pissed off about it.

The blond sighed, casting a look to this right, finding Zack to be in a very uncomfortable state. The raven haired man had his chin pointed to the sky, his head tilted back in a stiff slumber, his jaw unhinged in an unattractive fashion. Cloud resisted the sudden urge to wet-willy the hell out of the sleeping man, deciding that the end result would probably be a dangerous fit of flailing limbs, a deafening yelp, and the terror of the man taking his revenge while he took a nap of his own.

Heavy blue eyes left his friend and gave the road a quick once over before darting down to the gauges. He was mildly surprised to find that the custom-alteration Impala wasn't overheating into levels of treacherous consequence yet, as he'd been half expecting, though they would need to stop for gas very soon. He sighed and let his gaze return to the road, where it probably should have been in the first place. Smiling to himself, Cloud reached over to nudge his sleeping friend. He had never found himself to be cut out for long distance driving.

Zack's face contorted in the way that only the newly-awakened could manage, and violet eyes cracked open in somewhat of a state of shock.

"I fell asleep?"

Cloud just smiled at Zack's curious expression and shook his head. Sephiroth made a noise of disapproval from the back seat.

"Ja. About un hour ago. I'm just glad zat you zon't snore zat vay in bett."

Zack gave a loud yawn and stretched his arms as high as the confining car would allow and spun in his seat to gaze at Sephiroth affectionately.

"I love it when you acknowledge that we're sleeping together."

Sephiroth opened his mouth to reply, though stopped when he felt Leon's hand on his leg. He looked to the side to his cousin, who was looking at him in annoyance.

"Did they say where we were going?"

Sephiroth shook his head and made a face when Leon scowled.

"Do you think that they could at least let us take a break from the car before they rape and murder us?"

Sephiroth rolled his eyes.

"I don't think they are going to rape us."

Leon considered this before shrugging.

"You're right. I'm already willingly fucking him, and your subconscious is probably so starved for Zack's cock by now that you'd go with anything. It's the murder part that is still bumming me out."

Sephiroth's face pulled back in a look of horrified shock, unprepared for the lewd comment from the man he'd been allies with for the last three hours. They had been getting along so well in their shared state of paranoia that he'd forgotten what a crude dick his cousin could be.

Cloud watched the look cross Sephiroth's face after Leon's noticeable mouthy comment, and realized that there hadn't been a single fight between the pair since they'd left the house. The peace was not going to last much longer if they didn't get a little time apart, and soon. He watched the road, a small smile of gratitude forming on his lips as they neared an exit.

"We're going to stop and get gas, so if you guys need to use the bathroom or get some food, we can do that now, too. Or if you just want to stretch your legs."

Zack rolled his eyes.

"Okay, Dad."

Cloud grimaced, disliking it when Zack made a parental reference over his actions. He flipped on the right turn signal, though he had his serious doubts that the light actually functioned.

"Whatever. And I'm going to take a break from driving."

Zack smirked as the vehicle rolled down the off-ramp, eyeing the sign for the nearest gas station.

"What's wrong, are you tired after an endless three hour drive?"

Cloud glared, breaking a little harder than necessary at the red-light.

"Fuck you, Zack. Three hours in the driver's seat is like…two people years."

Zack only laughed and rolled his eyes. Cloud huffed at his friend's lack of sympathy, setting his sights on the Texaco on the right side of the road. Not only did it give him a convenient, effortless entry, but Zack would have a very difficult time getting back across the busy road without a stop light. Cloud eyed the clock on the dash and smiled. It read 4pm, but they weren't in Central Time any longer.

There was nothing wrong with being passive aggressive, watching Zack in rush-hour traffic was always fun.

When the mysterious Impala pulled up to pump seven, Cloud noticed a distinct lack of activity from the backseat. Thinking back, he hadn't heard a single word from the other two in the last ten minutes. He cast a glance back to ensure that the Germans hadn't bailed ship somewhere on I-10 without him noticing, and was relieved to find both Sephiroth and Leon hunched over together. He watched the pair for a moment, though jumped to alertness when two blank sets of eyes met his own, and he busied himself with finding his wallet.

"Here, Zack. You pump the gas. I'm going to go grab us something to eat. You guys like Wendy's, right?"

Cloud turned around, giving the two an innocent look. Sephiroth had discovered Wendy's two months ago, and since then, had been nearly impossible to take within 600 yards of the establishment. If that man saw a Wendy's, we was getting Wendy's. That's what threw Cloud so off guard, however, when all he met was cold green. There was no flash of hunger or joy in those eyes, just that blank expression.

"You guys okay?"

Sephiroth looked to Leon, who nodded, before turning once more to Cloud.

"Vee vant to drive."

Leon smiled, despite the cold expressions they were supposed to be displaying, when Cloud's blond head cocked to the side.


Think pink lips seem to sound out the word over a few times, not quite grasping it, though there was a look of panic in those blue eyes.

"Uh….Zack?!" Cloud raised his index finger to the men in the back, signaling that they should wait while he jumped out of the car to meet Zack by the gas tank.

"They want to drive."

Violet eyes looked instantly amused, and Cloud was met with a wide smile.

"They want to drive?"

Cloud nodded, signed and crossing his arms before letting his back fall against the side of the car.

He let his fingers comb though his hair, trying to calm himself down. Zack continued to smile at his stressing friend, squeezing the gas pump a few times, milking through as many handle-clicks as he could before screwing the gas tank cover back in place. He pressed hip to the car, lifting his arm to rest it on the roof of the car.

"Then let's let them drive."

Cloud looked skeptical.

"They don't know where we're going. We can't tell them where we're going."

Zack shrugged and handed Cloud back his wallet.

"Hour more on this road, take 75, and let them drive straight for a few hours. It's not big deal."

Blue and violet held each other in a locked gaze for a little before Cloud relented, looking to the ground and pushing himself away from the car.

"All right. They can drive."

Cloud cast a look out at the busy road beyond the parking lot, feeling guilty about purposely setting someone up to cross it. But it wouldn't be a big deal; they had traffic in Germany, right?


Cloud wasn't sure if it was fear for his safety, embarrassment, or the sheer force at which he was being tossed around in the back seat that had him doubled down and clinging to Zack as though his life depended on it. In the front passenger seat, he heard Sephiroth laugh. They were all going to die, and that bastard was laughing.

Zack's hand locked around Cloud's forearm about half a second before the loud sound of a car horn went screaming by, just out of sight behind the welded sheet, and the pair wondered how close they had just come to dying. There was a low string of mumbled words from the driver's seat, and Cloud tried not to slide back across the seat when the vehicle took a dangerously sharp turn. He felt Zack's chest heaving against his cheek, and he wondered if, other than the lack of penetration, if he and Zack had just gone through the motions of sex. It would seem that they were in the afterglow, however, as Cloud noticed a distinct lack of chaos around him, and didn't feel any form of extra gravity trying to beat the shit out of him. Gathering his strength and preparing to find an array of corpses and steaming cars littered across the roadway, Cloud detached himself from Zack and sat up, almost disappointed to find the world unscathed as Leon pulled the car onto the on-ramp.

"You had to pick a gas station on that side of the road, didn't you?"

Cloud looked over to Zack, who was just beginning to regain his natural skin color and the blood in his face. The two shared a look between each other before they were distracted by the foreign conversation in the front. The conversation wasn't what worried them, but rather, the worrying rate of speed at which the words went from neutral to irate.

"Why are these people stopping. This is a goddamn yield."

Sephiroth glared at the people in front of the, as well, joining Leon in his anger.

"I don't know. And why in the hell are there only two lanes on this road, anyway?"

Leon actually let go to the wheel, and turned to Sephiroth with wide eyes.

"I know, right?! Thank you! I have no fucking idea, but I've been wondering about that for a while now. Is this the fucking 1960's?"

Sephiroth shook his head, though he had to smile. He always loved it when Leon drove. Something about driving a car went straight to his cousin's head. Sometimes he felt endangered, but those were very rare times that usually involved a heavy rainstorm and German police. In general, though, Sephiroth enjoyed the way Leon went a little out of his mind, and he couldn't deny his own adrenaline rush that he usually picked up around 180kmh.

"What the hell is that?"

Sephiroth looked away from the minivan they had just sped past to where Leon was pointing.

It was a square, white sign that simply read "Speed Limit 70."

Sephiroth stared at the sign in intense scrutiny.

"I believe that may be the speed limit."

Leon cut his eyes to the side as the needle on his speedometer reached ninety.

"Recommended, right?"

Sephiroth shook his head.

"No, I don't think so. I think it's a general limit."

Leon turned to his cousin with wide eyes for the second time in two minutes. He then turned back to Cloud and Zack, who looked somewhat concerned for their lives when he passed a semi-truck much to fast and far too last minute to be safe.

"Speed limit…" Leon scoffed, turning back to the road and bringing the car to a 'crawling' pace of ninety five. "I've heard of those. I'm really not interested, though."

Sephiroth rolled his eyes and reclined in his seat.

"Just make sure you don't get pulled over. I don't think the officer would appreciate your lack of interest in his road signs."

Cloud was actually relatively surprised that, not only had they not been pulled over already, but also that Zack had refrained from comment.

"I do eighty and you give me shit, but he can do ninety-something and you just sit there?"

Zack turned to regard him in something that Cloud couldn't read. The raven haired man lifted a hand, pointing to Leon.

"You want me to play back-seat driver to that?"

Leon made a last minute pass around a white suburban, only catching sight of the middle finger for a fraction of a second.

"I couldn't see. Was that a "hell yeah" or a "fuck you?""

Sephiroth frowned, already beginning the process of rolling down his window.

"That was a definite "fuck you." Excuse us for not doing forty, you bitch."

Unable to respond to the slight with all of the slow moving vehicles to dodge, Leon left revenge to Sephiroth, who unbuckled his seat belt and leaned much farther out of the window than would be considered safe, giving the middle finger to the woman driving the offending SUV.

Zack had never been more hateful of the sheet of welded steel that replaced the window, as he was willing to bet everything he owned that Sephiroth's body probably looked amazing leaned over that window, with the speed and wind plastering his shirt to him.

Sephiroth pulled himself back into the car a moment later, fastening his seatbelt and regaining his peaceful composure.

"Thanks, I wouldn't have been able to put in the effort necessary for that. Nice hair, by the way."

Sephiroth looked to Leon, who was giving his wind-blown hair a humor smile. He raised a graceful hand, and extended a single, practiced finger to his grinning cousin.

Cloud was just beginning to remember how to breathe as he turned to Zack with alarm written deeply into his features. The raven haired man shrugged and leaned back in his seat. He was going to need to grab another nap, as assuming that they survived the next three hours, he was going to make sure that he drove next. There was no way he was letting Sephiroth get behind the wheel if he was going to jump of out the car at the first sign of protest from another driver.

Cloud sat back in his seat, deciding that, if he was going to die in a car accident, at least he was surrounded by damn good looking men. A thought struck him, though, one that had him curious. He leaned forward easily, almost pleased with how the seatbeltless backseat allowed him unrestricted movement.


The white hared man turned his head, regarding the blond calmly.

"What are the rules for international driving? Does your license let you guys drive anywhere, since you guys are all neighbors in Europe, or did you have to pass a test?

Sephiroth looked thoughtful, and Cloud watched with interest as Sephiroth said something to Leon, and the brunet passed over his wallet. Sephiroth flipped it open and searched for his license while Cloud and Leon shared a smile.

While the two lovers made eyes at each other, Sephiroth debated which group of words he was going to pretend meant "can operate a vehicle in North America." He had them feeling that if the two knew that Leon was not yet legally permitted to be driving, that they'd make him pull over. And he liked the way his cousin drove.

"Why do you need that?" Leon looked away from the road for a moment, not necessarily suspicious of Sephiroth, just unsure.

"Wants to know the rules about driving here. Don't worry, I'm lying."

He turned back to Cloud, holding up the plastic card to get the blond's attention away from the driver's seat. Zack leaned forward as well, abandoning his nap in favor of seeing the foreign license. The most exotic one he'd ever seen was from Québec, and that was only so exciting.

"Damn!" Zack took the license from Sephiroth at the first glimpse, though Cloud quickly snatched it away from him. After a moment of squabbling, the pair settled on holding it between them. Zack gave a loud whistle as their eyes roamed over the card, taking in the small, glossy photograph. To say that Leon looked anything less than breathtakingly arousing would have been an utter outrage. His chin was raised high and he was giving the camera a cocky, superior stare, his expression entirely smug, cunning, and oozing sexuality.

Leon watched from the rearview mirror, rather flattered at the reaction. He'd been quite pleased with that photo, himself. That was the ID that he preferred to show- it was must better than his passport photograph, that was for sure. He withheld a cringe at the thought of it. During the time of the picture, Sephiroth, at the last minute, said something rather rude about the woman operating the camera. Leon had moved to laugh, and the camera snapped just as his face had begun to contort, leaving one of his eyes dropping, his lips misaligned, and numerous other unattractive things. He looked retarded. And he did not mean the word 'retarded' as most people would use it in this case. No, he didn't mean stupid. He honestly felt he looked mentally handicapped. The real bitch of the situation was that the woman wouldn't even let him take the photo over again, because Sephiroth had pissed her off so badly. Sephiroth had taken his picture before Leon had, so he hadn't had anything to lose with his commentary.

He would have been worried that Sephiroth would show it to Cloud, but the two had a very strong agreement on that matter- Sephiroth could laugh all he wanted about it in private, but he was not to show the picture to anyone, or bring up the subject to anyone who didn't already know. Just to stay on the safe side, Leon kept it hidden, trapped in a small stack of worn out business cards he had collected for that very purpose.

Though he was still a little sore over the whole ordeal, it made him feel worlds better when he noticed the displeasure written on Sephiroth's face. Grey eyes flicked to Zack, who was still blatantly ogling with Cloud over the picture. He allowed himself to smile wider.

"Don't worry, cousin. The world was bound to realize that I was the better looking one eventually."

Sephiroth glared at Leon, though he was snapped out of his slight jealous rage by a question from the back.

"Can we see yours?"

While it was some what comforting to him that Zack was interested in seeing his license picture, he really wished that he wouldn't have asked.

"What, does he want to see yours?"

Sephiroth cut his eyes to glare at Leon's mirthful expression, though the brunet continued to watch the road ahead of them.

"You didn't tell them that you lost your license because you hit someone? Doing 80 kilometers an hour? I'm sure they'd love to hear that story. Make sure you include your blood-alcohol level. That makes the whole thing."

Sephiroth's glare hit a new level of animosity at his cousin's words. That was not one of the finer memories that he liked to recall. It really was a miracle that the man hadn't been killed. He still wasn't sure why the man was riding a bicycle at two in the morning, even if was on a back road. In his opinion, that made it all the more dangerous. He still remembered the way the man had smiled at him, even through his buzzed haze, and waved goodbye before the ambulance took him away. He'd told him not to worry, and that he wouldn't press charges. That hadn't kept him from losing his license, however, and the two officers who came to the scene had been far less forgiving. He felt terrible about it, and made sure to visit the man later in the week. The man had suggested that Sephiroth should probably mow the lawn for him, which he gladly did. It could have been worse—much worse.

Leon laughed at the way Sephiroth was glowering to himself, pulling his cousin out of his thoughts, and reminding him that he needed to produce his 'license.' He considered just showing them his passport, but decided against it. Not only was it clearly not a license, as it said "Passport," but it would also spark the other two to want to see Leon's. As much as he would love to flaunt that after what he cousin had just brought up, it was forbidden territory, and he would honor that. He did take a moment to laugh, though, thinking about the awful photo. He ignored the brunet's questioning look as he withdrew his own wallet, finding a laminated card within. Beside him, Leon snorted.

"Is that your library card?"

The pale man gave an indignant noise, passing the card to the eager men in the backseat. He felt like he was entertaining anxious children.

"No. Library cards don't have pictures on them."

Leon rolled his eyes.

"So it's your school ID then?"

"They don't know that."


"I don't understand why I can't drive."

"Why they won't let you, or why you are mentally unfit for the task?"

Leon glared at his cousin, though Sephiroth only cast him a ridiculous look from where he sat on the curb at Leon's feet. Cloud was seated next to Sephiroth, the pair watching as Zack worked to change the tire. The silver headed man tilted his head upwards, looking to Leon when Zack dropped another lug nut.

"You blew a tire passing on the shoulder."

The two held each other's gaze, neither wavering, despite the solid understanding that the brunet wasn't going to win this one. You weren't supposed to use the shoulder of the interstate to pass a man towing a U-Haul trailer. There was no way around that.

Cloud stood from the curb when Zack crawled away from the car, happy to help the black haired man return all of the tools to the trunk. Zack gave the group a wide smile, placing his hands on his hips.

"We're lucky this hunk of junk came with a spare."

Zack's face took on a moment of confusion, seemingly debating why he had actually used the phrase 'hunk of junk.' If he was lucky, Cloud hadn't heard him, and the foreigners were too foreign to know how lame that was.

Sephiroth stepped forward, his eyes locked on the smudge of grease that had smeared across Zack's jaw, just beneath that small scar. He resisted his urge to wipe the smear away, knowing that such a tender action would please his cousin far too greatly.

Cloud closed the trunk, sending Leon a warm smile upon noticing the signs of guilt creeping across the brunet's face. It would seem he was just beginning to realize that what he had done had been less than appropriate. Cloud didn't blame him for it. He couldn't stand getting locked in behind a painfully slow car. He was secretly thrilled that Leon had the balls to pull that maneuver.

"Don't worry. You're cute, and I'm sure that that crazy guy will understand."

Zack smiled at the blond, then moved his gaze to the brunet.

"It was about time for my turn to drive, anyway. So this actually worked out quite well."

"Vere are ve going, exactly? Squall und myself couldn't help but notice zat Orange Beach vas on zat side of Pensacola."

Sephiroth pointed west, his features clams, though his words held a sly undertone. Zack stared at his almost-lover for a moment before stepping forward and placing a quick kiss on Sephiroth's cheek.

"Can't be telling you that, honey!"

Sephiroth blanched, unable to respond as Zack kept smiling, turning to climb into the driver's seat.

"Now let's get gas and get back on the road. Think you'll stay up front with me?"

Sephiroth looked at the passenger door before looking at Leon.

"I think they really are going to kill us, but…" Sephiroth touched his cheek, to which Leon smiled and took over.

"But we don't care?"

Leon moved closer to Cloud, wrapping his arms around the petite blond's waist, slipping nimble fingers into the front pocket of the man's jeans. Sephiroth sighed, letting his hand drop to the car, popping open the door. He only shook his head and crawled into the vehicle to sit next to Zack.

Cloud looked up to this left, catching Leon's humored smile. The brunet stared at his cousin in the car for a moment loner before turning to the side, meeting the blond's stare. He pressed his face closer, capturing the other's lips in a closed mouth miss, though Cloud quickly changed that with one quick swipe of his tongue. Leon smirked against his lips, greedily accepting the intruding tongue, meeting it with his own. Cloud hummed in pleasured manner, brining his hand to clutch at Leon's waist, his fingers digging into the soft fabric of his shirt while Leon traced his hand up to Cloud's face, deepening their kiss.

Zack smiled, shaking his head as he watched the pair from where he leaned against the car, cringing while the numbers on the pump went up and up. He wondered if the pair had even noticed that he'd moved the car. Sephiroth wasn't so much paying attention to the two making out as he was enjoying the confused look on a little girl's face.

The child had proudly been awarded the freedom of walking in to use the bathroom by herself while Daddy pumped gas and fought the state map and Mommy made sandwiches in the back of the van. The girl had just made it to the curb of the storefront when the obstacle of two necking queers presented itself. Her eyes had grown wide, and she didn't seem to know what to do next. Sephiroth smiled at the lost child, pleased with the knowledge that the imagine would bring the child vast amounts of sexual confusion later in life. After all, if two boys could do that, then surely two girls could do it, too.

"Remember the last time we were at a gas station together?"

Sephiroth tore his gaze away from the frightened child who had just turned her wide, confused eyes to him, to raise an eyebrow at Zack.

"Ja. I remember. Ve got gas, right?"

Zack gave a pout, though it it quickly disappeared in favor of a more suggestive expression.

"And you were in my lap." He stuck out his tongue. "An oo eh ih."

Silver brows furrowed, having no idea what had just been said. Upon Zack's exaggerated show of his tongue, however, Sephiroth assumed the black haired man was referring to when he had bitten Zack's tongue in the car. Not that he would admit to the memory. Green eyes turned back to the little girl who had yet to move. He cast his gaze to Leon and Cloud, horrified to find his cousin's hand grabbing wildly at the blond's ass. The people behind the counter of the convenience store were staring, though they didn't look at all offended. Sephiroth supposed it made for a rather attractive sight, if he weren't so repulsed by the blatant sexuality of it. Sephiroth smirked as he continued to watch the pair lost in their passionate kissing, and opened the car door. He stepped out, immediately drawing the attention of the small girl in the way that only five feet of shining white hair could. He took a deep breath and prepared to contort his face into a rare expression. As the warm, almost genuine smile spread out over his lips, Sephiroth saw the little girl's face light up and he heard Zack drop the gas pump. He ignored the other man, though, moving to the girl who was already walking towards him. He wondered, vaguely, if he should drop out of college-- clearly he had a very promising career as a child abductor. He heard the retail price of a ten year old girl was rather impressive.

Zack watched with intense interest as a small girl ran to his tall, unfriendly lover. He was amazed when the girl reached him, and instantly lifted her hand for Sephiroth's. Even more amazing, was the sight of Sephiroth accepting the small hand, grasping it and linking their fingers before he began walking the girl towards the storefront.

Sephiroth tried to keep from flinching at the contact. He just didn't do kids. While they were, by no means, frightening like infants were, they still had a displeasure all their own in his opinion. Perhaps it was the germ factor, the crying, the dripping, snotty noses, and the fact that kids couldn't buy him lunch. Maybe it was just because they liked him so much. This was going to be worth it, though, he could tell. Leon was having far too much fun, and it was his duty to keep the other in line.

It was for the best that Sephiroth kept tabs on the pavement. If there had been a bottomless pit in front of the girl, she would have stepped right in it, as she had yet to look away from him. It had to hurt her little neck to crane her head up at him like that.

"You're really pretty."

Sephiroth looked down, offering the child another of his best manipulative-bastard faux-smiles.

"Danke." He gestured to his cousin and Cloud. "Is zat vat you're afraid of?"

The child looked as though she had a 'you talk funny' on the tip of her tongue, though she thought better of it. She had an great-aunt from Venezuela who tended to flip out when she said things like that to her. She nodded, instead.

"Are they hurting each other?"

Sephiroth had to withhold a smirk at Cloud's moans of 'pain.'

"Yes. The ozzer man is making him taste his teeth, and he doesn't vant to."

Sephiroth told himself that in some weird way, he was teaching the girl an important life lesson.

"And vat did parents tell you to do if any'von tries to make you taste z'eir teeth?"

The girl stopped abruptly, the burning in her bladder entirely forgotten as she watched the blond man "struggle" against the brunet.

"I'm supposed to tell daddy!"

Sephiroth nodded, releasing the girl's hand.

"Yes." he bent his knees and sat back on his haunches as he brought his face even to the girl's.

"You are a smart girl. Al'vays tell Daddy. Or, you can tell him." Sephiroth pointed, and the girl followed his graceful finger over to a parked policeman. The child's face took on a look of determination, and Sephiroth smiled when she snatched up his hand and led him to the cop car. He hoped that this wasn't going to back-fire on him. If asked why he was consorting with a ten year old girl, he supposed he could play the "she was lost and I only wanted to help" card. Besides, what child rapist would escort a kid to a cop? That had to prove something.

They approached the policeman, who was already eyeing the strange pair. It was relatively easy to realize that the two were not related, as the girl had a beautiful chocolate complexion with dark brown eyes while the man was nearly albino with and alarmingly green, serpentine gaze. He closed his game of solitaire, logged off of his laptop, and got out of the car when the two reached him. For shame, he'd been on a raging winning streak.

"Can I help you?"

Sephiroth only smiled, looking down to the little girl with encouragement. The policeman looked over their shoulders, hoping to locate the girl's parents. What caught his eye, instead, was a pair of teenagers making out on the front steps of the convenience store.

"I was trying to go to the bathroom and then I saw the man hurting the other man and then I made friends with him and he took me to you and will you please help the pretty yellow haired man, sir?"

Sephiroth withheld his smirk at the girl's fast paced wording, liking the look that took over the policeman's face as he worked through it.

"Hurting the pretty yellow haired man, hm?" The man, who's badge revealed him to be an Officer Luxor, put a hand on his hip as he tried to keep his smile from being too wide. Blue eyes observed the pair in question, finding something quite a bit different from abuse. He raised an eyebrow when the brunet man chuckled against the blond's lips.

"All right. I won't stand for this." He lifted a lazy hand to point at the pair, which caused the little girl to shake her head enthusiastically.

"Let's justice or something."

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow of his own at the policeman's nonchalant behavior, even it was painfully clear that the pair were not trying to maim each other. He rolled his eyes. At least he hadn't been accused of being a child predator.

By the time the justice trio made it to the other two, the little girls parent's caught sight of their daughter wandering around with a cop and some androgynous, silver haired thing. Both Mother and Father quickly made their way to the scene.

"What is going on here? Angela, what are you doing? Did this man try to hurt you?" The girl's mother was giving Sephiroth the evil eye, and the father seemed to be waiting for a reason to murder on his child's behalf. Angela's eyes got big, and she squeezed Sephiroth's hand tightly.

"No, Mommy! I was scared and he helped me and took me to the policeman so that we could save the blond man from the man in the furry jacket and then you came up!"

Sephiroth and Officer Luxor shared a look over the small girl, both clearly wondering if the girl ever took a breath. That was another thing Sephiroth had never understood about children from ages two through sixteen; they didn't bother to end one thought before beginning another.

The girl's parents seemed to relax, though her mother did not seem pleased until she convinced her daughter to release the strange man's hand and come to her. Reluctantly, Angela obeyed. She eyed Sephiroth forlornly from her mother's legs, five feet away.

When Sephiroth looked away from the pouting child, he found that Leon and Cloud had been approached by the policeman.

"It would seem that you two are creating a violent setting for our city's children. I'm not going to have to take you to jail, am I?"

Leon looked confused and suspicious, while Cloud turned bright red. It wasn't so much the policeman that had him nervous as the whole scene suddenly caught up with him. He was making out in front of a gas station in bum-fuck-nowhere, Florida. Kids were watching, kids' parents were watching, and policemen were weary...Sephiroth seemed quite proud of himself, though. The blond cast a withering gaze at the smug man, assuming that this was all his fault. Leon caught the look, and his grey eyes widened, also eyeing his cousin hatefully.

"Zon't blame me. You scared za girl." He motioned to the small girl standing with her parents.

"You need to learn how to keep it in your pants."

Leon barely refrained from patting his groin.

"I am keeping it in my pants, asshole."

Sephiroth sneered, but Angela looked exceedingly happy. She knew that the other man talked funny, but this was even better. Her eyes grew wide when another man entered the scene, flinging himself in front of the quarreling couple.

Zack lifted both of his hands, waving frantically at the policeman, and Sephiroth couldn't help but smirk widely.

"No, no Officer Sir! There has to be something wrong. I swear, I know they were probably being just a little but publicly indecent but they didn't mean it! I mean..." He pointed to Leon.

"He's European! He doesn't know any better! This is what they do over there, have sex in the streets and read dirty magazines and watch uncensored TV while they wear striped sweaters and train their poodles!"

Offier Luxor raised a confused brow, snorting in the back of his throat. Cloud looked disturbed, Leon confused, and Sephiroth seemed slightly offended.

"Ve're not French, Zack."

Cloud wrinkled his nose.

"Really? Why does everyone hate France so much. They didn't do anything."

Sephiroth didn't answer. He would have much rather been in France right then than America. French was easier, and the people there made more sense. They also had some damn good food, not that he could think of anything that had rivaled that chocolate sundae hamburger he'd had months ago.

Leon rolled his eyes.

"Are you tossing out random hatred for France now? I swear to fucking God, you need to get laid."

Sephiroth glared, crossing his arms tightly across his chest. He sneered at his cousin.

"Officer, I suggest ze maximum punishment. And mace."

With that, the towering man walked away, waving at Angela before making his way to the car.

The girl's parents looked confused, and held their daughter by the hand as they dragged her away. Sephiroth wondered when she would remember that she still hadn't gone to the bathroom.

"Ya know, I think I'm just going to let you kids off with a warning. Mace sounds a little excessive, and I've already got the Captain on my ass about that, if you know what I mean." He grinned, and waved a dismissive hand at the three as he withdrew a deck of cards from his uniform pocket, shuffling idly as he started to back away.

"Try not to be causing any more scenes. It's rough on the kiddies sometimes, no matter the persuasion."

Zack nodded dumbly, confused that this had all been a big waste of time. The other two had never been in danger of arrest, and the officer didn't even seem to care in the first place. He grinned nervously, almost embarrassed that he'd reacted as animatedly as he had. He remembered Sephiroth getting taken in, though, and there was no way that he could let anything like that happen again, and certainly not while they were on the road. He turned to the other two, smiling. Leon looked miffed, and Cloud was smiling smugly at his friend.

"Sweaters and poodles, Zack?"

Violet eyes narrowed, and Zack held out a stern finger, pointing towards the car, squaring his jaw and preparing to do his best Cid Highwind impression..

"Get in the god damn car, b'fore I start tearin' some faggot ass."

Cloud pretended to jump to attention, clutching Leon by the arm.

"Yes, Sir!"


Leon propped his feet up against the side of the car, his toes trying to strain away from touching the chilled glass of the window. They had gotten stuck in a terrible mess of traffic about a hundred miles back, so they were, according to Zack and Cloud, wildly behind schedule. He didn't mind so much, though.

He turned his head to the side, appreciating the soft curve of Cloud's cheek in the darkness of the back seat. Every other second, they would pass a street light on the interstate, illuminating the blond to him a little bit more. He smiled, moving his feet from the car side and curling his legs, rolling closer to his lover.

After learning that their car ride was going to be indefinitely prolonged, the pair had opted to fold down the back seats and stretch out a bit more. It was still rather cramped, and probably horribly unsafe. They were in an Impala, which was a car that did not generally lend itself to folding down back seats as would, say, a Prius, or a Suburban. Their upper halves were laid across the folded down seats, and their legs now disappeared into the blackness of the trunk, kicking and shoving at their sparse luggage when they felt the need.

"Clout..." The man in question peeked open an eye, offering a small smile at the other's use of his name.

"Leon." He said nothing more, just waiting, his blue eyes playful.

The chocolate haired German grinned, eyeing the other before propping himself up on an elbow to inspect their situation. Zack was driving, and his cousin was passed out in an awkward position in the passenger's seat. They could probably get away a little bit, so long as they stayed quiet. Zack was a good man, and he and Leon understood each other, even when they did not quite understand. Zack wouldn't try to mess up a little bit of back seat fun, and certainly wouldn't call attention to it. Sephiroth, on the other hand...

He felt a hand trace up his arm, and he looked back down. Cloud was eyeing him expectantly with a pale eyebrow raised. Leon leaned down a bit, pressing a kiss to the other's lips before debriefing his companion.

"Sephiroth is sleep. Not sure how long."

Cloud mentally swooned. There was just something about that heavy accent that got his heart beating. He loved it when Leon talked, though half the time he had to make the 'what" face that he'd come to hate himself over. At least, with Leon, he didn't accidentally mock his accent. He made a face. No, he saved that for Sephiroth, the one more likely to become offended. He stared up into grey eyes, and shoved all thoughts of mockery and Sephiroth right out of his mind, lifting his upper body and head towards Leon, catching his lips in a quick kiss before coming back down, bringing the other with him.

The brunet chuckled, though he made sure to stay quiet. He could feel the man beneath him trying to pull his shirt over his head, and he rolled his shoulders and angled his body away, allowing the other to push it over his head before sliding it off on his arms. He smirked down, content to watch as Cloud reached for his own top, sliding it up his lean, white frame, displaying inch by delicious inch of skin before his torso was completely exposed and the shirt was tossed carelessly to the side. Blue eyes stared up at him, daring him to move, and he could feel fingers running over his waist band.

"You're not wasting any time at all, are you?"

Cloud closed his eyes, and tipped his head back in a silent groan. That voice. It was dangerously sexy, and Cloud could detect a major change in his blood flow; it was as south bound as the little Impala on I-75. He mulled over that comparison, wondering if, secretly, he was a very large closet-dork for it. He caught sight of Leon, though, he was currently popping open the button of his own pants, and he decided that it didn't matter. Closet-nerd or not, he was totally getting laid. Now if only the secret police in the passenger's seat didn't wake up. Tanned hands slip up his side, and getting caught hardly seemed like a deterring factor.

Leon smirked up at Cloud, wondering why the other looked to lost in his own thoughts. This was hardly the time for thinking, in his opinion, and he sought to derail the other's distraction. He leaned up, wrapping his hands around the back of Cloud's neck, and pulled the other down for a kiss, working to keep the movement of their lips moderately quite, which had a thrill of its own for him. He massaged his lips over Cloud's, slipping his tongue out to trace along them, though Cloud ended that with a greedy slip of his own tongue, and all too soon they were battling for dominance, though it was a pointless altercation. Leon slid his hands down a bit, so that he was holding Cloud by either side of the face, forcing his tongue roughly into the other's mouth, no longer so concerned about noise level. He could feel blood thundering in his veins, probably a little too turned on by the nature of their risky activities, trying to fool around without being detected. Cloud did not seem to be fairing much better, and had an intense look of concentration on his face, slipping his hand down Leon's body, down to the open pants to clutch at the hot skin of his lover's erection, trying not to make any sort of groan or growl that would show just how hot he was, knowing what was in store for him. He grinned devilishly down at Leon, before blue eyes darted up to the front of the car. Zack was driving, and doing a rather admirable job of pretending he didn't know what was going on in the back, and Sephiroth was still asleep. He looked back down to Leon, gripping his cock tightly and giving him a few rough strokes.


The German smirked, and reached to shove his pants a little further down, and Cloud worked to slip his own down from his hips, though he removed his completely. It was cold, and it only got colder when Leon rolled them over, and his nude skin pressed against the chilled metal of the car floor. His head gently laid back against the bottom, and he could hear the hollow rush of the road just past the sheet of metal to his left. He wasn't sure why, but that only made him want Leon more. He spread his legs, a look of challenge on his face, which Leon returned with an eyebrow raised. The blond thought he couldn't do this without getting them caught? In his opinion, if anyone were going to get them busted, it was going to be Cloud, begging for his dick. He glared at the back of the seat, cursing his cousin's existence. Something like this shouldn't have been so rushed. He and Cloud were certainly going to have to make up for this as soon as they got to where they were going at such a terrible hour of the night.

Leon took the challenge, settling himself between Cloud's thighs, and looking down into bright, sly blue. Cloud had already wrapped his legs around him, which made him shudder to think about. The head of his cock slid along the line of the blond's ass, and the smile fell of his face, replaced with a pleasured frown. Grey eyes narrowed, and Cloud tilted his chin up, pressing his body towards Leon in a silent demand. The German was all too pleased to comply, and pressed forward. There was no time to spend preparing the other, and he doubted Cloud would mind. It didn't bother him in the least as the tip of his erection slid into Cloud's body, tight heat engulfing him, enveloping him entirely, and he had to work not to groan as he slid the rest of the way in. Cloud's eyes closed, and he tightened his legs around the other, biting the inside of his cheek hard enough that he drew blood. Leon helped him stay quiet though, when the other kissed him, tongue sliding against the new wound and taking the metallic blood in stride. He fought not to make any sound when Leon began to move, feeling that cock slide out of him before pressing back in, slowly at first before the other began to thrust at a faster pace.

Leon broke the kiss, feeling the taste of blood roll through his mouth as he thrust into his lover, angling his movements to the right a little, to where he knew he could make the other man writhe. He wasn't disappointed, as Cloud seemed to come unglued in his arms, and hands quickly threaded tightly into his hair, pulling him back down for another rough kiss as he kept pumping in and out of the heated passage.

"You can't get enough of me, can you?" He chuckled, muttering the words quietly into Cloud's ear. Cloud considered saying something overly complicated in return, because he knew how must Leon liked to say things that he couldn't understand, but the ability was beyond him as hot flesh crashed against his prostate repeatedly. His face pulled back in a near snarl, a silent, strained noise being made against the brunet's lips. He would not make a sound. Grey eyes surveyed the nearly violent was Cloud seemed to move against him, and Leon's whole body quivered in ecstasy. There was nothing like watching Cloud during sex. It was like pornography. Nasty, and loud, and blond pornography.

Cloud sighed, the most noise he could allow himself to make, lifting his hips up and immediately regretting it, as a low sound burst past his lips. He was tempted to look up and see if the other two had noticed, but he really didn't give a shit. Not when he was this close, and it was this good. 
Leon laughed against the other's lips, his eyes closing as he felt a coiling and tightening in his lower stomach. Cloud was no better off, arching against the other as electricity coursed through him, every thrust hammering against that over-sensitive little collection of nerves within his body. They continued to move together, rocking and kissing and sneering, until it became too much. Cloud seized up beneath the other, wrapping his arms around Leon's shoulders as passion overtook him, and his whole body seemed to fall out of his control. Leon felt hot liquid splash against his stomach, and he would have smirked if he hadn't been working so hard not to moan, feeling the fire in his body spread, and releasing himself inside of the small man beneath him. He thrust a few more times, until he was completely spent, and stilled his movements. He looked down at Cloud, who was panting silently, blue eyes half lidded in exhaustion. It was hard work to fuck and not get caught. Thin lips contorted into a smile, and Cloud craned up to kiss the other, and Leon returned the grin. He slid himself from the blond's tired body, and reached to pull his pants back up. Cloud, who usually didn't bother redressing after their sex, figured that it would, indeed, be wise in this case. He reached down when Leon had moved, and threw his own pants back on before he was pulled against that gorgeous tanned chest. He was all to happy to settled into the other's hold, and kissed the skin of the other's arm before lying his head in the crook of Leon's shoulder. They couldn't be too far of now, surely. It would do them well to just sleep the rest of the way.


Zack was miserable. Violet eyes glared hatefully at the SUV that passed him, before he glared down at his own torment. He was hard, and Sephiroth was practically attached to the car door, passed out. He wasn't sure how the other would respond to being nudged awake for the simple sake of sating Zack's sexual distress, but the man wasn't sure if that was a safe thing to attempt.

He could have killed Cloud and Leon. How could they rut around in the back of the car while he was stuck up here driving, forced to be affected by the sounds they thought they weren't making? It was bullshit! He made a face, and cast his eyes across the darkness of the car to Sephiroth again. He didn't understand how something could be so fucking beautiful. It hardly seemed fair, especially in his condition now. How was he supposed to stand a chance? He also wondered why something so damn good looking had to be so damn volatile. He supposed that was for the best, though. If Sephiroth would have had the demeanor of, say...Dora the Explorer, and went around trying to help everyone he met while looking like that...well, Zack didn't want to think about it. He didn't have to, either, as his cock was making it hard to think about anything other than the way he was burning for some form of contact. He watched the road for a second, before he decided to risk being brutalized in the front seat of a shady Impala. He reached over to his lover, wondering how the other man could possibly be comfortable like he was. He ran his hand over the other's thigh and up to his arm, knowing that waking up Sephiroth required very little effort. He woke him up all too often just by moving in the bed, much to the other's displeasure.

Sephiroth woke with a start, tired eyes cracking open as he looked over to Zack in confusion. He closed his eyes tightly a few times, trying to work the sleep away as he pulled away from the door he'd been asleep against, and tried to stretch the best he could in the limited space. Hungry eyes watched the movement. Sephiroth stretching did very little to easy the pain in his lap. When the other had finally deemed himself to be awake, Zack looked to him, and gestured his head to the back. 
"They're asleep."

Sephiroth tilted his head, too tired to look anymore curious than that. "So?"

Zack grinned at him, and let his eyes travel the other's body. He reached out for Sephiroth's arm, grabbing it and hinting that the other should slide closer to the center. The taller man complied, though he wasn't sure why, and moved closer. He was going to ask why when his eyes caught the straining bulge of Zack's jeans, and green eyes cut up to violet. Zack grinned, and offered the other a winning smile.

"I wouldn't have woken you up if this weren't serious business, Seph. Haven't you ever heard how dangerous it is to beat off and drive at the same time? I could kill us all in one fail swoop."

He looked over at the other and leaned in as far as he safely could while driving. Sephiroth took the hint, and moved the rest of the way, and their lips met in a brief kiss, though when Zack didn't move, Sephiroth pressed their lips together again, this time feeling Zack's tongue slide against his. He pulled back, much to Zack's displeasure, and thought about the situation. He ignored the fact that Zack was putting their survival on his shoulders, based on orgasm. Green eyes surveyed the road, and he noticed an upcoming blue sign.

"Zere is a rest stop in one mile. I am sure you could safely take care of your problem zere."

Zack rolled his eyes, and looked to Sephiroth, an expression of skepticism on his face.

"Please, Seph..." His look turned softer, and he nudged his head backwards.

"They're asleep. They just got done screwing around, so they'll be out pretty deeply for a while, you know that.....Come on, babe...Please."

Sephiroth lifted a white eyebrow, not willing to admit how much he liked to hear Zack beg for him. It gave him a feeling of power that he otherwise felt that he lacked in bedroom with the other. Serpentine eyes cut over his shoulder, eyeing the sleeping pair, and the way they were huddled up to each other. At least the two seemed to care about one another, though you wouldn't know it with some of the things they said to each other in bed.

He looked at Zack, who had gone back to watching the road. He just watched him for a little bit, taking in his face against the harsh, orange lights on the road. He had never told the other how painfully attractive he found him, and he likely never would. Sephiroth didn't know how to bring it up, and so he just let it lie. He assumed that Zack knew. Surely he wouldn't touch something that he found unappealing.

Zack sighed, and looked out at the road. At this point, he figured he had a 20% chance of success. Those numbers spiked dramatically, though, when warm lips pressed against his jaw. A monstrous smile spread out over his lips, though it shrank into a tight lipped grin when a hot tongue dragged itself from his jaw to his ear, and breath huffed against his sensitive skin.

"Vat do you vant me to do, Zock..."

Sephiroth knew very well what Zack wanted him to do, but he was going to ask anyway. And Zack was glad that he did, because just hearing those breathy words in his ear had his pulse quickening, and his felt his neglected cock twitch. He turned his face to the side, and kissed the other. He couldn't kiss him as much as he wanted to, not without driving the car off the side of the road, which would not lead to him getting sucked off, and therefore, was not an option to be entertained.

"Put me in your mouth, baby." 
Sephiroth smirked at the other's words, and pulled Zack's earlobe between his teeth, earning a hiss of pleasure. A graceful hand moved out, over the console, and over to slip up Zack's leg. It came to rest on Zack's denim-covered erection, giving the hard flesh a firm squeeze as he pressed another kiss to the other's ear. Zack cringed when Sephiroth more or less made out with his ear, his breath heavy, far too turned on by Sephiroth's breathing and the hot, wet sensation at his tongue and lips on his sensitive ear. That mouth was far too good at far too many things, and Zack thanked God every day for dropping this creature into his life.

He smiled when he felt Sephiroth's hand move from squeezing him to working on the button of his pants. He didn't struggle too greatly, even in their awkward position, though Zack did help him with the zipper. Sephiroth could only reach him with one hand, and Zack didn't want to go through the agony of a zipper wound when other things could be taking place. He sighed when his stiff cock was freed to the open air, and Sephiroth cast his eyes down, from Zack's ear, to give it an appreciative look. He kissed Zack's ear one final time before pulling his face away, just looking down at Zack's arousal as he slid a finger up the smooth shaft, and finally gripped it, and rubbed his thumb over the head. Zack made a sound that was not so much of a groan as it was a breath, but it all counted the same to Sephiroth. He gave a small smirk, and looked to Zack once more before he leaned down.

Zack lifted his arm out of the way, all too happy to allow Sephiroth to lean down towards his erection. He rested his hand on the other's shoulder, his gaze flicking from the road down to the silver pooled in his lap. He was somewhat sad that he wasn't going to be able to see anything, but feeling was going to be more than enough.

Sephiroth lowered his face, bright green eyes taking in the sight Zack's waiting sex, cocking his head to the side a bit, careful not to touch the steering wheel before leaning in to kiss the head. He kissed it a few times, drinking in the way Zack's breathing patterns struggled to find some sort of regulation. He kissed along the shaft and down the base, letting his nose trace along the skin, above where he was kissing. He moved his head a bit, and kissed along the underside of it, letting his hand slip over Zack's thigh to slide into Zack's opened pants, reaching in to clutch the other's balls as he raised a bit, and slipped the head of the erection into his mouth.

Zack hissed the moment that hot mouth enveloped him. Good fucking God, this was one of those things that made life every bit worth living. His fingers threaded through white hair, and he fought to keep his eyes on the road as Sephiroth's tongue swirled over his tip before those lips engulfed him once more. He could feel the suction pulling at him, and he shuddered, chancing a glance downward. He couldn't see much, for all of Sephiroth's hair, but it was still a head in his lap, coupled with the feelings of being sucked off. Needless to say, the image was pretty damn hot. He gave a tight-lipped grin as he continued to play with Sephiroth's hair, rubbing his fingers over his ears as he brought his eyes back to the road. The wet sounds of that tongue and those lips moving over his cock were a hazard, and he had to reach over and turn the radio on to play softly, else he come far too soon.

Sephiroth smirked around hot flesh when he heard the obnoxious voice of a late night radio DJ. Part of him was concerned that the noise would rouse the out two, but it didn't seem like it was that loud. Besides, he know that Leon could sleep through a nuclear attack, let alone Disk Man Sam from W-S-U-X 69. If he had been a born and bred American, he would have appreciated the sexual humor in such a station name, however, that joke was left to be enjoyed by Zack alone. He had no idea why such a piece of shit car had XM radio, but at this point, Zack didn't bother questioning it.

Sephrioth shifted in his awkward position, twisting his upper body to support his movement a bit better, and drawing Zack deeper into his throat. It occurred to the American boy that, radio announcer be damned, his stamina was no match for the back of Sephiroth's larynx, or whatever the hell was that far down a throat. Zack hadn't passed anatomy, but he didn't need it to know that his own body was going through a very specific chemical reaction.
He gave up on the radio, annoyed by the announcer, and more than willing to listen to the soft slurping sounds, regardless of the affect they had on his body. Did it really matter if he came sooner because he was listening to them? He was driving, anyway. He probably shouldn't be prolonging this.

That warm hand took up his testicles again, rolling them gently in his palm. Zack had to clear his throat to block out the groan, his thighs tensing as his lover kept up the treatment. He didn't need to see Sephiroth's lips to know that he was smirking, but it hardly hurt his ego. Those lips could smirk all they wanted—they were still wrapped around his cock.

Sephiroth kept up his movements, bobbing his head gently, taking Zack's erection in and out of his mouth, licking, sucking, and swallowing as he saw fit. He never let up the attention to Zack's balls, and he smiled when he felt those fingers tighten in his hair. It surprised him just how much he liked making Zack come.
His eyes fell closed as he heard Zack's breathing speed up, and that hand moved from his hair to squeeze his arm in a silent warning for what was to come. He didn't flinch when hot liquid flooded his mouth, relaxing his throat and swallowing it as it met him. He slowed his steady movements, being sure that Zack was entirely worked through before letting the softening member slip from his lips. He lingered for a moment, before pressing a kiss to the skin just above Zack's base, and pulled away.

Zack watched as the other man sat up, going back to his side of the car without so much as a glance. Sephiroth could be so passionate at the time, but as soon as it was over, it was almost like he treated it like some sort of business transaction. He shook his head and reached out to him, running a hand up Sephiroth's thigh, and holding it.
Sephiroth glance down at it, secretly pleased that it was there, even allowing himself to ghost his fingers over Zack's before resting his head back on the seat. Something about sitting on his ass in a car all day wore him out, and he saw no reason not to fall back asleep.

Zack smiled, watching as Sephiroth attempted to nap. The man couldn't have chosen a better time, either, as they drove past a giant sign, lit up with more lights than the economy would have liked. He drove on, finding peace in being the only one awake in the car, and was proud to say that he located their hotel with a relative ease.

He parked the car temporarily out front, and looked over the seat to the two cuddled up in the back. He slipped off his seatbelt, and reached out, slapping Cloud on the ass.

The blond woke with a start, a bit confused as to how arms wrapped around his waist had managed to smack him. One look over his shoulder to a wide grin settled that, though, and he rolled his eyes.

He whispered in a hiss, trying not to wake up Leon. From the way Sephiroth was slumped over in his seat, Cloud assumed he was asleep, as well.
Zack smiled, and popped open his door.
"We're here. I'm going to go get our room keys. You want to go ahead and wake them up, and get their stuff together?"

Cloud smiled, sleep no longer on his mind as he shook his head to clear his mind. Thank God. He was damn tired of sitting in a car all day. He eyed Leon, and how cute he was when he was drooling on the floorboard of the car. If Cloud had been a generous sleeper, he might have shared the jacket he'd been using as a pillow, but the blond had a nasty tendency to hog things in his slumber.

Zack nodded, and got out of the car in order to hunt down their reservations.
Cloud, meanwhile, sat up, and looked around him. They were certainly a sad sight, cast about a Chevy Impala in a graceless and uncomfortable state of rest. He sighed, and prodded Leon with a thin finger.

"Hey. Hey! Get up, we can finally get out of the car."
The brunet seemed unwilling to awaken just yet, and Cloud turned his sights to Sephiroth.

"I think there's a Wendy's across the street."

Green eyes were opened in a flash, though disappointment was clearly seen in them when all that was in sight was Cloud, the cracked leather of a dashboard, and the brick hotel. It was almost enough to make Cloud feel guilty.

Cloud raised an eyebrow, intent on playing dumb.
"Vere vat?"

Sephrioth glared, not all that amused by the accent mockery.

Cloud worked hard not to crack up, settling for a smile and the shake of his head.
"No one said anything about Vendy's. We're here. Help me wake your cousin up, and get our things, so we can sleep in a real bed. Unless you like the passengers seat?"

Sephiroth rolled his eyes and climbed out of the car, coming around back to pull open the trunk. He looked down at Leon's sleeping face for a moment before slamming the trunk as loudly as he could. The answering think of Leon's head jerking up and smacking into it was more than satisfactory, and he smirked as he opened it up again, grabbing his suitcase.

"Guten Morgen, Squall."
Leon glared, but Sephiroth only scoffed.
"Get up. We're here, and we can finally get out of this miserable car wreck waiting to happen."

Leon grumbled, but he couldn't argue with that. He pulled himself out of the vehicle from the trunk, hauling his large bag with him. Cloud climbed out after him, pleased when Leon turned to grab his suitcase, as well. He figured he'd do Zack a favor, and picked up the dark haired man's bag as he went to close to trunk, only to pause.

"Oh. I borrowed someone's sweater for a pillow. Sorry." He reached for it, holding it out, though neither Sephiroth nor Leon made a move to grab it. Sephiroth looked a little ill.

"You slept on that?"
Cloud looked a bit concerned, and nodded slowly. He didn't like Sephiroth's tone.

"Eh…That came vith za car. I find it shoved under driver's seat, with old Snickers bar."

Cloud barely had time to look positively ill, as Zack attacked him from behind, wrapping his arm around him happily.
"Room number thirty-three. Two queens, a bathroom, and a mini fridge. Fuck the Impala. I'm taking the Holiday Inn."
He grinned, laughing quietly as he took the strapped from Cloud's shoulder, and took it upon himself to grab Sephiroth's bag, as well. Had to be a gentleman for his lady, after all!

Sephrioth yawned, gladly ridding himself of the bag.
"Vere are ve, exactly?"

Zack and Cloud's sly smiles were the only answer he received, and he cast a look to Leon as they started for their room.

"If we die tonight...Please know that I absolutely loathe you."

Leon balked.
"And know, cousin, that I heard you giving Zack head in the front seat an hour ago."

Leon walked ahead, proud of himself, and a stunned Sephiroth glared, taking up the back of the line with a scowl. It was for the best that the two Germans didn't realize they were in Disney World. They would have probably squealed like little girls.