Title: Think You Can Fly?
Princess Destiny
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PG 13+
'One Hour Challenge' #20: Response Fanfic. Usagi gets drunk on spiked punch at a party and staggers home, crashing into Mamoru on the way. Add Alcohol and ditzy blonde and you get trouble!
Genre: Romance/UST/Comedy
Year Completed:
Size: 32 KB

One Hour Challenge #20: "One of your 'Couple' gets dead drunk, thinks they are Superman and attempts to fly off a five story building!

Comments: Hi everyone! Here is another Oneshot of mine written back in 2002. This is when we started the One Hour Challenges list and I think we all wrote over 100 Fanfics in less than a month. Wow. If you'd like to write for one of these Challenges, go to our Site Destiny's Gateway' and click on the link that says 'Challenges'. I've put up over 600 OHC's for everyone to write Fanfics for. Oh, and we have a Mailing List also for this, the link is in my Profile. Go to it!

Original Notes: I haven't written a Sailor Moon one for a few days, so here goes! I don't really know what I'm going to be writing about-but I'm crossing my fingers it'll come out nice and mushy! It took an hour and 15, so sue me! It's 2 in the morning! I know I took a while to get to the Challenge Scene, but that's just how it came out! How was it? It was sort of funny. ::Grin:: I couldn't resist having Usa's nose smack into Mamoru's chest constantly.

Donations: I feel bad asking for help to keep my Site 'Destiny's Gateway Archives' going, but I'd hate to see it go down for the first time in the eleven years since it's been running. ::Sigh:: We need to raise a further $100 US to buy space for another two years. Donations can be made from . The link is in my Profile.

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By Princess Destiny

"87 bottles of beer on the wall! 87 bottles of beer!" Usagi sung badly, staggering from side to side down the sidewalk of the business district. The busy crowds from Friday night shopping paid scant attention to the blonde as she weaved from side to side, bleating her song off-key. She was just another teenager who'd gotten a little tipsy. Yeah right! She was roaring drunk! "If one of those bottles should happen to fall-"

"Odango?" An astonished voice said, accompanying a rock-hard chest. The blonde bounced off before she could stop herself, but was caught easily before she hit the ground.

Mamoru stared in amazement at an obviously drunk blonde. Her eyes were bright, her cheeks flushed and he had no doubt she was probably seeing life through a haze. He pulled her upright and rested his hands on her shoulders as she weaved.

::Hick:: "Mamoru?" Usagi said, focusing her eyes on her worst enemy. Okay, that was his chest-

Her eyes flew upwards over his black shirt to his throat, then his concerned face. "There'd be 86 bottles of beer on the wall!" she finished happily, diving nose-first into his chest.

Mamoru sighed as the blonde fell into his chest hard, arms limp at her sides. She was off her face! What the hell had happened here? "Odango? You awake?" he asked in sudden amusement, aware of the strange picture they showed to the passing shoppers. Here he was in a his best tuxedo, with a petite blonde with her head buried in his chest and snoring-snoring?

"Usagi!" he hissed, reaching up to shake her lightly. A snort answered him. Yep, she was asleep alright! He rolled his eyes. Great. Usagi was passed out on his chest, in the middle of Friday night shopping! "Odango?" he said teasingly, getting an idea. He tapped her on the head. "I have chocolate!" he tempted her in a sing-song voice. The reaction was immediate.

The Senshi of the Moon shot upright when someone said the magic word 'chocolate'. "Where? Where?" she demanded, reeling back. She focused on Mamoru's grin and suddenly remembered where she was. Oh, she must have gone to sleep! She blushed.

On Mamoru's chest!

She frowned when she remembered why she'd jerked awake. "Where's the chocolate?" she demanded, stalking closer and slapping him on the chest. Mmm, his chest was nice and hard. She patted at it again, then stroked it.

Hmm, nice.

Mamoru really worked out!

His eyes widened when he realised his enemy had stopped thumping him for chocolate and was now stroking over his shirt in a most distracting manner. "Usagi!" he yelled, startling her. The blonde reeled back again, eyes wide. He reached out and caught her before she fell on her butt.

"Why are you yelling?" she yelled at him in outrage. She'd almost fallen over! Hey...she blinked up at him, once again in his arms. How'd she end up here? "Something's wrong with this picture," she said aloud, frowning and biting her lip.

"What's wrong with this picture?" Mamoru asked, staring down into her eyes as she stared up at him. She was biting her lip in an endearing way, looking perplexed.

"You-" Usagi poked at his chest. "And me-" she poked a finger in her own chest, then swayed forward so that she was leaning against his length, head at an obviously uncomfortable angle as she fought to keep her eyes on his. "Close."

She pulled her arms from her sides and smacked herself in the nose.The blonde frowned and attempted to touch her hands together. Her hands slapped together and she grinned up at him sheepishly. "Close." The Senshi of the Moon emphasised, leaning her chin on his chest and going cross-eyed in her attempt to stare up at him.

The upperclassman felt a grin cross his face and laughed aloud at her antics. Usagi was pretty cute when she was smashed! His grin faded and he stared at where she was. She was practically glued to his entire front from knees to chest! In public!

He looked about quickly and stepped back.

Usagi took a nose-dive when her support vanished and Mamoru's arms came about her for a third time to stop her ungraceful swan-dive to the cement of the sidewalk. "Okay-back with the closeness factor." she muttered into his shirt. Closeness factor? Oh! She giggled. It had to be that Buffy she'd watched the other night!

Mamoru rolled his eyes as the blonde ended up in his arms again. She was a mess! She snickered into his chest and his eyes jerked down, wondering what was so funny now. "Usagi? Can you stand?" he asked, amazed that he was still with her. Okay, so she was an annoying blonde-but she was also a very drunk annoying blonde. He couldn't leave her like this. "HOW did you get drunk?" he demanded, arms tightening about her waist in a protective manner.

He'd murder whoever had gotten her this way!

Was it a date? "Was it a guy?" he demanded harshly, putting a hand under her chin and forcing her head up to look into her glazed eyes.

"A date?" she said in confused. Then she realised what he was asking. "No. A party. With the girls," Usagi flapped a hand about, trying to remember what she was saying. "You know? The girls?" she emphasised. Now, what were their names again?

"Which girls?" Mamoru asked, frowning darkly. If she meant her friends Rei, Ami and Makoto, he'd have a few things to say to them. How could they leave Usagi in this mess?

The small girl glared at Mamoru when he wouldn't co-operate. "The girls." she said again in exasperation. She pushed back from him to gesture wildly. "The girls...in red and-umm blue and...uh green?"

"Huh?" Okay, he had no idea what she was talking a-

"With tiara's! And other fashion accessories. The one with the umm-dark hair has high heels?" Usagi rolled her eyes, crossing her arms and swaying dangerously on her own two feet.

Tiara's? High-heels? Could she be talking about the Sailor Senshi? Usagi didn't know the Sailor Senshi! Mamoru frowned at her disapprovingly. Why would Usagi lie about being at a party with the Sailor Senshi? "The Sailor Senshi?" he said helpfully, not believing a word.

He crossed his own arms and stared at her superiorly. Usagi just had no idea who she was talking to! He was Tuxedo Kamen and he knew the Senshi! She'd just seen the news or something and was fantasising.

"Yeah! The Senshi!" Usagi squealed in delight, happy that he'd gotten what she was trying to say. She was trying to recall something that was just at the back of her mind, but it wouldn't form. Something she should be remembering...

"Rei! That's her name! And Ami and Makoto!" she stomped her foot. "How did I forget their names? I feel so weird." she almost whined the last word, trying to figure out what was going on. She'd been drinking and having fun...then she had the urge to go shop and left the party...then she'd been singing and then crashed into Mamoru.

"You've ruined my shopping!" The blonde girl accused, pointing a finger in his face. Her finger shook and she struggled to keep it steady, then rested it on the side of his nose, relieved to have it still.

Mamoru gaped at her. Usagi had her finger almost up his nose! He quickly knocked her hand away. The blonde's arm flew out and she spun completely around, coming back to face him and swaying dangerously.

"Oooooh, everything's spinning" she moaned, staggering left, then right, then head-first.


Mamoru sighed in resignation as Usagi crashed into his chest. Again. "I'm going to take you home, Usagi" he told her gently, stroking her head. She was as helpless as a kitten like this! He sighed again and looped an arm about her waist, turning them both.

"Ooooh, diiiizy." she groaned as the ground swung crazily. She blinked and realised she was being half-carried down the sidewalk. Mmm, this was much easier than walking! Look how fast they were going. She looked down to her waist where she could feel a hard band and saw his arm looped around it. Wait, this wasn't right. She looked down further and saw that her feet were dragging along the sidewalk.

That wasn't right either!

"Eh?" she uttered, befuddled. "Lets see. Umm-my feet should be...doing things. By themselves."

"Uh huh," Mamoru said absently, only half-hearing her. How had he gotten himself into this mess? Here he'd been at a party with the most prestigious doctors in town with his 'work' tuxedo, carrying a drunk blonde...no, make that dragging a drunk blonde, along the busy sidewalk. And yep, he was getting some weird looks! He didn't blame them!

"Come on feet!" Usagi snickered. That one was from Labyrinth! She'd watched that one last night at Rei's house. Her lips pouted. Why couldn't a gorgeous guy like Jareth fall for her? Sure, Sarah said the 'words', but it had been obvious that he loved her! "And she turned him into an owl." Usagi muttered. "What sorta stupid girl is that?!" she shouted the last word in complete outrage.

A drop-dead gorgeous royal dude sung songs, and probably composed poetry. for a girl who had no clue he was head over heals ga-ga for her?

"What was that?" Mamoru said, staring down at the blonde. He sighed. Her head was almost at her knees. The only thing holding her up was HIM. Mamoru spotted an alley and headed towards it, looking about hastily for watching people. Nope, no one was watching. He jumped into the alley swiftly with his Tuxedo Kamen strength and propped the blonde up against the wall. Her head thunked against the bricks hard because her head was held so limply and he winced.

"Owww?" Usagi said, not sure if it hurt or not. Then the stinging started and she winced. "Owww!" she shouted, hands flying up to hold her injury. She smacked her ear and yelled again. "Damn it!" she screeched, annoyed. What was with her limbs? They weren't doing what she told them to.

"You're your own worst enemy right now, Odango" The dark-haired man noted, smiling. He walked closer and bent her head forward to check out her injury. His fingers dove into her silky hair, checking for blood. No blood, but a bump was forming. Damn. She's have an extra pain tomorrow along with her hangover.

"I think someone spiked your punch," Mamoru said, putting a hand under her chin to tilt her head up. The moonlight above lit on her face, screwed up in pain. "It hurts huh?" he said gently, studying her eyes. No concussion. Good. But now she was staring at him weirdly.

"Spiked? Spike?" her face lightened, a grin curving her lips. "Spike! Like on Buffy? Now that's a hunk."

Mamoru's eyebrows rose. Spike? Buffy? Oh...that vampire show! "The bleached blond?" he inquired. So that's the sort of guy Usagi went for? Somehow he was disappointed. Usagi liked blonde guys with accents. Okay. And why did that bother him?

"Don't frown!" she told him, reaching up to smooth her finger over his forehead. Hey, she'd gotten it first go! "You'll get wrinkles." Usagi informed him solemnly.

Mamoru chuckled and gently removed her finger. Usagi sure talked a lot when she was smashed! She certainly wasn't a depressed drunk...which was good. Yeah...she talked. He smiled at her slyly. "So you like blonde guys huh, Usagi?"

Usagi was too drunk to realise he'd used her name. She shook her head, then nodded, then shook it again. "Noooooo," she said, drawing the word out hesitantly. "At least-I like Spike 'cause he's cool and grrrr and all that. But I love dark hair."

He stared at her in surprise, eyebrows rising again. "Oh?" he said non-comittally. So she liked dark hair? "Anyone in particular?"

"Tuxedo Kamen!" Usagi squealed, throwing her arms out to the sides happily. "Dark like a-a raven! Yeah. A wonderful blue eyes that you could just drown in." she trailed off, not noticing Mamoru's stunned look.

Usagi liked him! Tuxedo Kamen! Okay, so he knew she had a crush on the guy, but the tone in her voice was much more than adoring. It was almost...loving? "Oh?" he managed again in a strangled tone. "Do tell."

"I love 'im!" she announced gleefully, then clapped her hands over her mouth. "Ooops?" she muttered from behind them, staring at him with wide eyes.

"You love m-Tuxedo Kamen?!" Mamoru gasped out, pole-axed. He could see the truth in her eyes. Usagi loved Tuxedo Kamen! Him.

Usagi tilted her head back, staring up at the moon. Her hands fell from her face and she smiled dreamily. "Oh yeah. When he rescues me I feel all safe and warm..."

The upperclassman frowned. He'd never rescued Usagi! He was sure of it. Was she hallucinating? It was possible, he supposed, with a dead drunk girl. "How long have you loved him?" he asked carefully, wondering why he was asking. He was seeing Usagi in a new light now. His worst enemy was in love with him-and she didn't know it was him. Mamoru.

"Oh, for ages!" Usagi admitted, giggling again. She suddenly spotted something at the side of the building and her eyes lit up! Stairs!

"Oooh!" she squealed, making a mad dash for them. She heard Mamoru swear behind her and put on the speed she usually reserved for mad-dashes to School and battles! "Ship ahoy!" she yelled, reaching the stairs and running up them. She weaved about a little, but she managed to keep her feet.

"Usagi! Stop!" Mamoru shouted, running swiftly after the blonde. She was so fast! He stared in shock as she actually blurred for a moment, then appeared a story up. He gaped. "What the hell?"

"Whoo, that was fast" The Senshi of the Moon staggered as she saw she was already at the top of the stairs and staring over the roof top. She grinned widely and jumped about on the rooftop gleefully, enjoying the freedom of being so high up and close to the Moon. "I'm Sailor Moon, Champion of Justice!" she bellowed, throwing her arms wide.

"Usagi! I'm going to strangle you!" Mamoru bellowed back, leaping onto the roof. The blonde was nuts! They just run up five flights of stairs! How the hell did she manage that dead drunk? And why wasn't she tired? He knew he wasn't because he was Tuxedo Kamen-

What was her excuse?

"I'm flying!" the blonde yelled, spinning around and around on the rooftop and getting dizzier and dizzier. "Woooo, erk, diiiizy" she moaned, staggering about now as her eyes tried to focus.

"Usagi! Watch out!" The handsome man shouted in panic as the dizzy blonde staggered to the edge of the roof.

Usagi saw the stars swirl about, then her foot caught the edge of the roof and she was falling. "I am flying!" she yelled as she fell. "I'm superman! Champion of Justice!"

Somewhere after the second when she started to fall, reality hit her and she sobered abruptly. Terror went through her and all she could think of was Mamoru's horrified face-and her transformation broach.

"Moon Prism power!" she screamed, closing her eyes as she ground rose up fast. She felt the power go through her, but knew she'd be too late.

"Usagi!" Mamoru roared, throwing himself off the roof after her. He fell like a rock and summon his transformation. Tuxedo Kamen flew down and grabbed Usagi's leg just as she screamed something, tossing her up into his arms.

The blonde exploded into golden light and she was suddenly buck naked in his arms.

Even as he gawked at a naked Usagi, she disappeared into ribbons and then he was holding Sailor Moon. His feet hit the ground hard and he fell forward. He managed to fall sideways and crashed into a garbage pile with a stunned super heroine. "Fuck!" he swore, from both the pain in his legs from impact and the fact that his worst enemy was the girl he was in love with.

Sailor Moon moaned and buried her face in Mamoru's chest, completely forgetting she wasn't Usagi any more. "I'm gonna be sick," she muttered, burrowing closer. She reached up and looped an arm about his neck. "You saved me!"

"Usagi, you're Sailor Moon!" Mamoru whispered into her ear, voice filled with shock and wonder.

Sailor Moon's head jerked up, mouth gaping. "How did you-?" She suddenly noticed just who was holding her. "Tuxedo Kamen!" she gasped. "What?" she looked down at herself and her eyes widened. "Oh shit!"

"Oh shit, is right, Odango," he said dryly. Usagi was Sailor Moon. USAGI, the klutziest ditz in Juuban was the super heroine he was in love with. No way! "Usagi, you're Sailor Moon." he repeated, dazed. He let his head thunk back into the pile of garbage.

The blonde reclined against his chest and gaped. Odango?! Only Mamoru called her that!

She reached out and grabbed the half-mask from his face, gaping again. "You're Mamoru... Mamoru is Tuxedo Kamen! Oh god my head hurts!" she wailed, hands winding into his lapels. She shook him, glaring accusingly. "You're Tuxedo Kamen! And you saved me! I hate you." she told him fiercely.

Tuxedo Kamen's head jerked up and he stared into Sailor Moon's furious eyes, only a few centimetre's away. "You hate me? I just saved your life!"

"You didn't tell me you were Tuxedo Kamen!" she wailed at him. She thumped him on the chest, moving further up his body so that she was laying on him fully. He groaned, but she was too intent on berating him to notice how intimately she was pressed against him. Her eyes went wide in horror as she remembered something. "I told you I loved you!" she screeched, thumping him again. "You jerk!"

"I love you too, Odango," Tuxedo Kamen said quietly, hands going about either side of her waist.

Sailor Moon suddenly found herself crushed to his chest and regarded him with a flabeghasted expression. "You love me? You love me?" she cried out disbelievingly. "We're worst enemies!" she reminded him, poking his ribs.

He looked at her intently, eyes darkening with emotion. "I love Sailor Moon...and you're Sailor Moon." he murmured, a hand creeping up from her waist to the back of her neck.

That was a demented logic, if ever he heard it!

"I uh...And I love Tuxedo Kamen." Sailor Moon said warily, aware of his roving hand. He was looking at her with an almost hungry expression and her heart began to thump harder. He was suddenly making her very nervous. "But I hate Chiba Mamoru..." She paused. "Well, not hate, more like dislike or annoyance even."

"I'm Tuxedo Kamen." he purred at her, hand winding into one of her ponytails and tugging her closer.

Sailor Moon licked her lips nervously as he tugged her close till her mouth was almost touching his. "Then ah-" she said awkwardly. "Then...I guess I love...you?" she finished, hand coming up to touch his cheek hesitantly. She loved Tuxedo Kamen and Mamoru was Tuxedo Kamen.

Wait, did this make any sense at all?!

"If you love me, the I'm all yours," he whispered against her lips, eyes locking with hers. "And you're mine." he finished possessively. He closed the distance between their lips and caught hers in a passionate kiss.

The End

Please review me! You don't know how much it means to an Author to get a review on their Fanfic and to know that you're enjoying it. Believe me, it makes us want to write more for you. LOL.

I'm not entirely happy with how fast the 'I love you's was said in this, but it's only meant to be a funny Oneshot. Oh well! I think that I have one more Sailor Moon Oneshot to post, and then you've read them all. It's called 'What Could Be' and I'll post it in a day or so. Here is a snippet for a new SM Fanfic I'm writing called 'Fortune's Favorite':

"You were married to the ruler of the known world."

"You're pulling our legs!" Makoto gawked at the woman. "Are you saying Usagi was married to Genghis Khan?!"

Please don't forget to check out my Archives 'Destiny's Gateway Romance Fanfiction Archives'. The link can be found in my Profile, so just click on my pen name above this Chapter and come on over.

Princess Destiny