Credit for the idea and original beginning of this fic goes to Leonhart321

Disclaimer: the authors of this story (yes its a collab) own neither the YGO , YGO abridged , Sonic the Hedgehog, Zelda, Final Fantasy, Harry Potter, or Dan Green's voice. The only thing we can take personal credit for is when the writing staff talks to the characters. Other than that, we own no one.

This crossover was written on the YGO:TAS site, and in the rules for the first chapter, every blurb had to have the word 'win' incorperated into it somewhere as were the rules of where it was posted. That changes after this chap though.


Chapter 1: Fan service

Bakura was walking slowly through a big forest. Far off, he could see a campfire burning, he decided to go there while humming "I win, I win, I win!"...

The fangirl, her trap for Bakura sprung, pounced on him singing her tribal chant, "I win the Internet, I win the Internet"

Bakura was shocked and said, "Egad! What do you want from me, little fangirl! I am too busy winning!" However, the fangirl, while busy winning, tied him up to a tree and called her fangirl brethren, and all the fangirls came screaming towards him when suddenly Marik appeared...

Bakura, who had just won a chess game that morning, was not powerful enough to resist and said "Are you all going to rape me now?"

However, the winner of the most mad haircut (as Yugi had been disqualified for using drugs), Marik said "No! Now be quiet or I shall set the fangirls on you!"

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...I'll get you for this Marik, if it's the last thing I do! One day, I'll set all YOUR fangirls on YOU! Oh...wait...you don't HAVE any fangirls, you not-winner!...loser!!!" Bakura looked in dismay at the exited fangirls as they and Marik closed in on him when suddenly; Bakura's millennium ring began to shoot laser beams at Marik's millennium rod! A heavy laser beam fight began. But the winner was...Bakura! And the fangirls cheered 'cause they loved Bakura then they realized that now he could escape so they all tried to simultaneously glomp him. But from the ashes arose Yami Marik, the main character, who said "You couldn't win against me while 4kids was on your side, you will never beat me! HAHAHAHA!" Bakura suddenly realized, he wasn't on the winning side and told his fangirls that he'd have sex with them if they killed Marik.

The fangirls, delighted that the dreams of them winning had come true, promptly undressed themselves and Bakura and pounced! They tried to kill Marik but he lasered them with his millennium lasers but although he won, Yami Marik had died underneath the sheer weight of Bakura's fangirls. After that, Bakura was successfully raped by 3578 other fangirls. These fangirls won, and Bakura died of heart failure.

Or did he?

Then, when the fangirls thought he was dead and had their backs turned, Bakura ran away and hid up a tree! But the fangirls began their satanic rituals summoning a swarm of Bakura slaves so they could enjoy the pleasures that they had won all the time.

The Bakura slaves won by mauling the original and forcing him to drop from the tree but then the ring activated, revealing the true winner: Yami Bakura, the Smexy.

The fangirls, after having seen their winner, Yami Bakura the Smexy, chased him if only to get a touch of his ring. However, the second one of them won and touched it, they died from an overload of winneritis as they were so overwhelmed to have toughed the giant gold ring. Those that didn't were so ashamed that they had failed to win, prostrated themselves at his feet, begging for a touch. Happy to see the fangirls and slaves doing, as they should, bowing down to their winning lord, he kindly scraped them off and made a run for it as a new flock of fans were coming.

However, these new fans were different, they had won the right to fly using wings that were surprisingly shaped like a Red Eyes Black Dragon's." No" Bakura said, "It couldn't be him...could it?" He turned around to face Atemu: his evil 'always winning everything' rival. "What do you want?" Bakura barked, keeping one ear and eye on the rapidly approaching flying fangirls

"I'm the main character you know" Atemu said, "What else would I want except to win?"

"Only cause 4kids screw the..."

"Don't even think of making an LK reference!"

"Stop stealing my lines!"

"Just you wait until Zorc hears about this!"

"ARGH!!!!!!!!"

Then the fangirls attacked mauling him, one by one, slowly winning the admirations of Atemu. "I could use them for an army if they can catch him," he thought quietly... well it was quiet until he started to be mauled too, the girls' wings stabbing one another, and the two males, as they tried to break through the massive crowd to get to their smexy men below.

Then an explosion rocked the woods, HE, the winner himself, has come.

Written by: Leonhart321, Egyptianeye, Mana and Mangalink


Thanks to the dedicated staff of the abridged fic: Bakura Witch Project, as this was made for fun, and has no real meaning whatsoever... it doesn't even have a plotline yet. XD, i hope you enjoyed our randomness, and do please review, flames or cookies, i accept both happily.