2nd of September, 7.24

I really have no idea why I'm writing... None at all. My mum thought that writing would be a good "outlet" for my "overactive" mind. Pfft. Mothers just don't understand these days. She shoved this bloody thing into my hands just before I boarded the Express yesterday. Honestly, does she think I'll have time to write now that I'm finally home? Off to breakfast... If I don't write again, don't be terribly surprised.


Alright, so I lied. I'm writing again. After I promised myself I wouldn't. I wish I had self-control. Lily is giving me a weird look... Probably wondering why I'm being so secretive. Yes, did I tell you? (Obviously not, looking back at what I wrote above this.) I'm working on my "secretive" look. You know, just in case I need to be secretive. Must go finish Ancient Runes assignment... Or something.

Five minutes later or so

Alright, so I'm not-so-rapidly working on my Runes assignment. Honestly. Don't know why I bothered taking that class. More boring than... I don't know what. I must ask Lily what is boring.


Lily gave me a weird look when I asked her what was more boring than Ancient Runes. Maybe I asked the wrong person... But I did manage to figure out the time. Anywugglies, she told me that Ancient Runes was a fascinating subject and that I should embrace the learning opportunities that Hogwarts has provided for me. Right, well. That's what I get for asking a muggle-born... Not that there's anything wrong with that... I mean, she introduced me to the... er... That what's-it thing that muggles watch. You know, the box? With the glass? And the little people inside it? Quite fascinating, really... Though I don't know why muggles just sit around all day watching little people in a box. Don't they have anything more interesting to do with their lives? I shall ask Lily.


Right. Erm, Lily told me that I should take Muggle Studies if I'm so interested in muggles and their behavior. But then she came to the realisation that I am, in fact, enrolled in Muggle Studies. Along with some of the Marauders. Oh, I haven't told you about them? Well, let's see. There's James Potter also known as Lily's Worst Nightmare Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong. She can't stand the boy, but, nonetheless, he pines for her. He really can be agreeable sometimes. Well, more so than Black. Mmhmm. That leads me to Marauder Number Two: Sirius Black. Known for, er... I don't know, actually. I just know that the majority of the female population at Hogwarts finds him attractive and desirable. I do not fall into that majority, and I find him quite undesirable... Well, he's a prat, either way! I think the longest he's had a girlfriend is, well... I'd guess about five days? I don't know. Then there's Remus Lupin. The most agreeable of the Marauders and he doesn't seem to maraud as much as James and Sirius. He's more interested in school, which Lily thinks is good. She tells me I should be more like him. (Like that's going to happen, Lils!) He can be quite peculiar, though. He goes to visit his mum every month. I guess she's sick, or something. And then, last (and most certainly least), there is Peter I-Forget-His-Last-Name. Doesn't really matter though. He's quiet and boring and just follows James and Sirius around... I bet he has a James and Sirius shrine. I'll ask them in Transfiguration... Speaking of, I should probably get there!


Just made it! Of course, now I'm stuck sitting next to Mr. Prat himself: Sirius Black. How did I manage that one? Let's ask him. (Hope you don't mind, but I suppose I'll let him write in here, seeing as I'm a nice person and all that rubbish...)


... Yeah?

How did I manage to be stuck sitting next to you? It's like in those muggle box-screen shows where the poor, innocent little girl gets stuck next to the mean bloke.

Whatever have I done to you to make you think I'm mean? ... Is this a diary?

No, it's not. And I think that you've er... Been quite mean to the female population of Hogwarts. And now you're changing the subject! Answer my first question!

What's a "muggle box-screen show"?

Changing the subject again! ... I don't know. Lily showed it to me at her house... It's this thing where little people are trapped inside and muggles watch it for entertainment or something.

... You mean a television?

How did you know that?! I didn't even know what it was called!

Apparently, I pay more attention in Muggle Studies than you do, Reynolds.

... So? That was quite hurtful, and, dare I say it, unnecessary. I'm done conversing with you.


Didn't I tell you he's a prat?


I just got hit in the back of the head with a note from Potter... He's asking if this is a diary. Which it isn't. So, since I'm a mature witch of sixteen glorious years, I responded by drawing a picture of him being speared with a spork. Ha. That'll show him.

After Transfiguration, En Route to History of Magic

Well, Potter didn't know what I drew on the note. So I had to explain it. Which, ultimately, ruined the whole thing, because Black had to go and say that the drawing didn't look like James at all and that, whatever it was, looked like it was attached to a cucumber. I didn't ask for his opinion anyway, now did I?

I probably shouldn't be writing while trying to get to class...

9.11, History of Magic

... Falling asleep already...

Hello, Ms. Reynolds. This is Professor Binns. I would much appreciate you not falling asleep in my class and actually taking notes like your friend, Lily Evans, does. Please see me after class to discuss your punishment.


I've resolved to drop (The Dreadfully Boring and Ultimately Useless) History of Magic class. But first I must serve a detention... With a ghost as my supervisor. Honestly, Professor Binns! What sort of teacher writes in their students notebook? I must alert the gang and what not about this... Did I mention that the Marauders also have detention with me? I think today truly is my lucky day.


Lily gave me quite the lecture on the way to Potions. "How can you sleep during class? You could at least pretend to look alert! Sometimes I wonder why I'm even friends with you! You can be worse than Potter!"

At this, I gasped. If I'm worse than James on occasion, that must mean I'm really bad.

"Lily, how could you say something so cruel?!"

Of course she quickly gushed an apology and says I'm nowhere near as bad as Potter. All lies, I tell you.

10.16, in Slughorn's Hole of Boredom and Doom

Lily, remind me again why I'm taking Advanced Potions?

Because you did extremely well on your OWLs... Which, I must admit, was quite a surprise. Did you actually study for once?

Yes! Of course I studied!

Who payed you and how much?

Gasp! I'm shocked you would think that I would have to be paid in order to study. And, for your information, Remus had asked me to study with him because, apparently, I have a gift for Potions and he does not.

I thought you didn't really like the Marauders?

That's you, love. Not me. I don't really have a problem with them. Except Black. He's ridiculous. Remus is quite fine, though.

... Have you noticed he's been asking you to study with him quite a bit?

Lily, that was last year. He hasn't asked me to study at all with him this year. Honestly-- there isn't anything to study, now is there?

Right, well... Oh look. A note from the table of Remus and Potter. You're quite popular today, aren't you?

Shut it...


So, the note. You probably want to know what it says, don't you? Well, it was from my dear friend, Mr. Lupin. Actually, it was from Potter with a request from Mr. Lupin. Lily's responding to it. Even though I was the note's intended recipient, Lily feels the need to be my secretary and respond for me.


You're studying with Remus tomorrow.

What for?

Well, doing homework, I'd imagine. We did get an essay in History of Magic. Oh, I forgot... You were asleep.

How come I don't get to respond to my own notes? It was for me, from Potter. Not for you. If it was for you, he'd be asking you to go out with him.

But, of course, the answer to that would be no. Besides, I know you secretly enjoy spending time with, oh, what did you call him? Your "dear friend, Mr. Lupin," was it?

... You're a barmy bat. I hope you realise that.

Why, thank you. You truly are a good friend.

11.01, in Muggle Studies, Situated Next to Remus

I'm getting more detailed about my whereabouts, aren't I? This I'm quite proud of. Soon enough, I shall be a great writer! Anyway, Potions was quite like it always is. Black and Potter managed to blow up their potion. Slughorn got mad. Did you see the little drawing I did of Slughorn? A very literal interpretation of the man, I must say. I suppose I'll have a chat with Remus since we're learning about that box-screen thing that Black told me was called a "veletision" or something... I don't feel like really looking for the word.

Hullo, Mr. Lupin!

Are you actually taking notes? ... Oh, never mind. You're not. Did you just write "veletision"?

... Er, yes... Isn't that what it's called?

Look up on the board.

Oh! Ha. Television. Yeah. Right, well... I'm never going to own one.

... What is that slug doing with a horn and a mustache?

That's my literal interpretation of Professor Slughorn. D'you like it?

It's charming.

Thank you! Wait- shouldn't you be taking notes? You're always taking notes! And now, you're not... You are conversing with me! Are you feeling feverish, Mr. Lupin?

We're reviewing what we learned last year, Elizabeth.

... I knew that. I was wondering if you knew if Peter has a shrine for Sirius and James?

I don't know... Why do you ask?

Because he stalks them. And he seems like the type to have a shrine. You know, like a sock James wore during a Quidditch match or a spoon Sirius used at breakfast...

I really don't know about that... I could ask him.

Or you could just look under his bed.

... What?

You know, maybe he keeps the shrine under his bed? That's where I'd keep a shrine if I had one. I think I shall investigate.

How are you going to go about doing that?

Easy: Go up to the 6th year boy dormitories, you're going to show me which bed is Peter's, and I'm going to crawl under there and see what I find!

When did I volunteer to show you up to the dormitories?

Just now. Besides, it'll be fun! I know you think Peter is strange. Everyone does. He's stranger than... Er...


That's not fair! I'm not that strange. In fact, I can be quite normal when I care to be. See?: The television was invented by muggles in the year 1927 by Philo Farnsworth.

Now you're just taking notes.

Oh, Lily tells me that you and I are going to work on an essay tomorrow. When's that going to happen?

I was thinking after dinner, since that's when most people tend to work on their assignments for class.

What's the essay about, then?

Art, I think. Professor Binns didn't tell you after class?

He was too busy giving me detention with you lot tonight.

Ah, I see. Maybe if you payed

Now you're sounding like Lily! Stop it or I shall ban you from writing in here!

You let Sirius and Lily write in here.

Well, Lily is my best mate.

Sirius isn't.

I was asking him a question.

He said you two had a stimulating conversation.

... I think not. Good-bye.

Do you really enjoy spending time with me?

I thought I said we were done.

I was just reading what Lily wrote.

Oh, well. Yes, you're a wee bit more enjoyable than the rest of the Marauders and sometimes Lily. You don't really bother me about not paying attention and such. Up until now!!!

Well, you do tend to do anything in order to avoid getting things done.

Yes, but that is my nature. Honestly, am I really going to use all this muggle-knowledge anywhere outside this classroom?

Probably not.

My point exactly. I only pay attention when the need arises. Like in Defense Against the Dark Arts... Or Transfiguration. Speaking of, I think I want to become an animagus...


Yeah. I'll ask McGonagall about it.

Why do you want to be an animagus all of a sudden?

Because... My mum and dad told me I should show some dedication to something. And, wouldn't being able to turn into an animal at will be wicked?

I suppose so...

What time is it?


Yes! Class is almost complete! And then, LUNCH!

Are you really that hungry?

Quite hungry, indeed! Food is a gift! We must enjoy it and eat as much of it as humanly possible!

You're reminding me of Sirius.

Don't say mean things like that, or I'll have to scratch out the part about you being my friend.

Well, I'm going to pack my things up. Have fun, erm, writing to yourself.

I will!

12.03, Great Hall, Next to Bridget

So, I'm attempting a very daring feat: Insert foodstuffs into my mouth and write in here at the same time. Does that not shock and amaze? Lily is telling me I shouldn't eat so much food so quickly. Anne is busy glaring at Black. And Bridget is watching me in mild amusement. Perhaps I should be an entertainer?

12.05, Great Hall

I think Anne is going to burn holes in the back of Sirius' head... Wouldn't surprise me. But his "marvelous" hair would probably just cover up the unsightly holes and girls would still fawn over him. Have I yet confided why Anne hates Sirius so bloody much? It's actually quite simple really: They went out for about 3 days. Snogging and all that what not. And then, she caught him with another Bonnie Lass (I call her a BL because she's some Irish girl) and when he tried to explain his way out of the situation, he didn't even remember her name. Called her "Molly" or "Mary" or something like that... So, he was about... Er... 13 letters off alphabetically as to what her name started with. I'm sure if he'd addressed her as "Amelia" or "Alice" or some other name that began with 'a', her knickers wouldn't be in such a twist. Ah well. She is part of the gang, and thus I must support her burning hatred for Black. Which is why I don't particularly like him.

12.07, Still in the Same Place

Potter just waltzed over and asked Lily to Hogsmeade or something. She dumped her pumpkin juice on him and stalked off. Poor bloke. I told him he may join Bridget, Anne and I. He was busy moping about being rejected again. So, I tried to comfort him with, "She'll come 'round eventually, James. So, when does Quidditch practise start?" I always know how to make people feel better, don't I?

12.53, Heading to Ancient Runes

You have no idea how quickly I translated that assignment that I had all summer to complete. So what- I procrastinated. Who ever came up with homework over hols, anyway? Some barmy old bat, I'll bet.

1.04, In Runes Classroom

Decidedly want to switch to a school in Egypt. Maybe Runes would actually be relevant there...


And, as a bonus, there are mummies and tombs. Rather fascinating, really. I went back in 3rd year for hols with my mum and dad. My mum was quite bored and was paranoid about contracting some disease. My dad and I spent the whole time exploring. Did I tell you my father used to work as a Code Breaker? Now he works for the Ministry. Department of Mysteries. Doesn't really talk about it much, not that he's really allowed to, I don't think. Mum doesn't do much except fret over me constantly. I've already had 3 letters from her and I just arrived at Hogwarts last night.


Another bonus, I wouldn't get letters from my mum for at least a few days! ... What if Wuggles died of heat exhaustion, though? ... Can owls even succumb to heat exhaustion?


Decided that owls can die of heat exhaustion... But what about African swallows?


Are they migratory? ... I wonder. (It's from some show Lily and I watched at her house.)

1.14, Still in Runes

I think I'm really getting the hang of this "Not Paying Attention" business. Really, though, I've been doing Runes decoding since I was 5. My dad, the strange person that he was and remains to this day, forced me to do it. Not that I didn't like it. Runes fascinate me. But, honestly, while every other witch and wizard was learning to ride a broom, I was translating Runes.


Do you think that was a cruel thing for him to do?


Haha. Lupin's asleep already. I'm not going to let him forget it.


Just sent Remus a note and it whacked him in the head. Serves him right...

Except now he's glaring at me...

... I hope he still helps me search for Peter's shrine.


Remus wrote back. Told me I shouldn't be writing notes in class. How prefect-ish of him to say so. Look at him! He was just sleeping.


I must inform Lily that her fellow prefect was sleeping during Runes and that she should no longer abuse me about doing so.


Welcome to my first Harry Potter fanfiction. Obviously, I own nothing that was created by the brilliant, brilliant mind of Ms. J.K. Rowling. And, for those who don't know, the African swallows bit was from Monty Python. (But I'm sure you already knew that!) Anyway, I hope you enjoy and review.