My very first… yaoi!!!
I tend to rave on and on. Shigure's a pretty difficult character; sometimes serious, sometimes funny. I always thought he was a bit strange, so that's how I depicted him.
Shigure sat in front of his computer.
This was it.
This was the end of his life.
The ultimatum of doom had been thrust on top of him.
It was inevitable.
Every single author went through it at one stage.
He – never.
Every author's nightmare; author's block.
With a loud wail and flap of his limbs, Shigure ran from his work room. He couldn't stand another minute in there without suffocating in his own putrid morbidity.
Yep, this was serious.
"My brain! My brain has been scoured out with a toothpick and spat on by many homeless and ugly, old women!" Shigure was never one to forget the dramatics.
Of course, in the public eye, he behaved as a proper gentleman should, even going as far as to wear a suit. In the safety of his home, insanity was assured.
He'd contemplated the lunacy of his own mind and he could think of only one problem. He had a short-attention span when he was bored. Well, it wasn't really a problem as much as it was a bother. And it wasn't as much as a bother as it was a figment of his imagination.
It spurned from childhood, well that's what he blamed it on.
Of course, being cursed, everyone would one day become victims of lunacy, and/or stupidity. Why, there'd been Uncle Shinta who believed he was the Emperor of China; Ariko who had twelve imaginary children and even his own cousin Hatsuharu who fell into a crazed anger from time to time due to multi-personality problems.
Shigure was always one to ponder whether the Sohma family had been full of such oddities even before they were cursed. It might just be hereditary.
'Family time over, I need stimulus!' Shigure giggled to himself as he walked down the hall.
It wasn't five minutes later that he decided that sitting at the table didn't give him any ideas.
Tohru wasn't home so her delicious little jiggle couldn't spurn his thoughts, nor could the chirping of those incessant birds that habited the gardens. However was he going to regain his abilities? If he couldn't concentrate, he'd never be able to write another book. Then he'd have no job, no income and a life of misery!!!!!
Okay, that's taking it a bit too far.
He'd just have to move back into the Sohma Main House, which wasn't anywhere near his to-do list.
Akito would be terribly smug about the whole fiasco, making him do menial tasks to pass his days away.
He'd have to live a life of servitude to pay for his livings! In a world where a human girl can only get so far, he was going to perish. Oh the demons that plagues the lands would be sure to devour him before he'd even found a husband. His eye had been on Ashitaka the young samurai in training and there'd definitely been sparks. Certainly the old priest could marry them before Ashitaka went away to some war? Then he could raise a handful of children and maybe have a dog or two. He'd make rice-wine from the crops to sell at the market. Oh the life!
Wait a moment.
Was there any chance…?
Could it possibly be…?
No, that's been done before.
He needed something original.
Something that would set his stomach alight with butterflies. Something that would sedate his perverted nature.
Of course he wasn't object to writing about a medieval poor woman who found romance in the midst of war.
However Shigure was one of those weird writers. He considered himself a role-player of the mind. Whenever he thought of a new story to write about, he'd picture himself as the main character. It not only helped spurn his thoughts, but also helped him become one with the character. Plus, it was fun.
Take his latest book for example: Abrupt Desires.
Which guy didn't dream about being a luscious teen in the midst of finding her sexual awakening?
Okay, not many.
But he didn't really consider it to be that strange. He'd sold thousands of copies of his books and that's how they were all made. So what if he was a little unusual.
He was a Sohma, therefore being unusual was being normal.
But the problem right now wasn't about the Sohma family. It was his ideas. There weren't any new ideas coming in, so he needed a different type of stimulus.
Shigure got up and walked out into the backyard.
It was sunny, couldn't that help?
He turned around and went back inside.
The sun was far too bright for his delicate eyes and he'd rather eat the grass out there than stay too long in the blistering heat. The sun had a tendency to turn people's skin into the type of leather found on sofas and anyway his skin was perfect just the way it was.
Well, if he couldn't escape the house to find some type of idea or muse for a new story, he'd have to find something inside the house that could. Since the kitchen table was out, he'd have to resort to searching elsewhere.
Shigure traveled back through the kitchen and walked around aimlessly.
"Now I know what it truly feels like to have nothing to do." He whimpered to the emptiness. "Why must you curse me so, Mr. House, which has given me so much and taken so little back?"
Yep. Definitely crazy.
"Why, oh why? Why House? Why must you find pleasure in my torment? Why do you have to be so spiteful? I didn't mean for Kyo and Yuki to rip holes in your walls or for my dastardly cousins to tread so heavily upon your splendid carpets! What do you want from me?!?!?!?!?!"
Fortunately for the readers and my own sanity, Shigure was interrupted from his self-pity and insanity by the ringing of the phone.
Shigure ran to the phone, finally something to do!
"Ahh… Shii-chan it is so wonderful to hear your voice at this pleasant time of the day! How are you?" It was his favourite cousin Ayame.
"AYAME!!!!! I'm so terribly stuck and I feel like I've been chased across Japan by a group of shapeless elderly women who for some reason resemble our old school principal! Save me from this torture!"
To put it bluntly, Ayame was shocked.
"Shii-chan, whatever do you mean? It surely can't be that serious! Have some wine and crackers, you'll feel better!"
That was Ayame's answer? Wine and crackers? Wine and crackers! WINE AND CRACKERS!
"AYAME!!!!! Wine and crackers are for socializing! Not just sitting around the house by yourself! Do you really suggest such a thing for me… do I mean that little to my favourite cousin? I'm in a crisis!" Shigure was not a playful puppy today; in fact he was quite close to tears.
Now this was awkward, Ayame had never heard Shigure talk like this for a long time. In fact, Shigure had never regressed to such a state before; except in high school when he actually had been chased after by their shapeless and elderly school principal.
"Worry not dear Shigure, I'll be right over!" Ayame hung the phone and raced towards his dear cousin's house.
Meanwhile, Shigure sat in the living room picking at his hakama. Now that he knew Ayame was on his way he could relax. Surely Ayame could think of something to help him get rid of this block.
In fact, if anyone could get rid of this block, it was Ayame.
The snake of the zodiac was a sophisticated business man; he had a lovely girlfriend – Mine, and a promising future in the fashion business. He also had the best gossip.
Oh the elicit stories about his customers!
Shigure's favourite was the schoolgirls that wanted something to wear for their special night – together! The amount of ideas that came from one story of Ayame's were astounding. If only his own life could be set in the realm of a fascinating tale.
However, he couldn't remember exactly how any of them went. Sure the general hint of sexy lingerie and stiletto heels… but without names and descriptions, it wasn't really worth trying to get his stimulus from memories.
What he needed was a new memory. Hmm… perhaps Ayame would take him out on the town. He hadn't been in on the game for years, and that affected a man.
Oh it really affected a man.
Especially a man with a dog's libido. Wait, how much libido do dogs have anyway? Well, he imagined it was large, extremely huge.
But, now he was out of ideas. Of course, the illicit day dreams about sexy yet oh-so-innocent schoolgirls never got old, he wanted something more for his new book. Well, really he just liked to get some variety.
So what if a sleazy hooker was the only variety he might get. If that's what it took, he'd find someone to do it then pay them for the details.
So really, he was just having a bad week… month… okay, without the denial, year.
A year is a long time.
"Three hundred and sixty-five days." He muttered to himself.
That was a long time. When he was younger, he was a total stud. Heck, he still was! He just didn't have as much access to naive teenage girls as he did when he was sixteen. Oh sure, he had access to plenty of people, but they mostly consisted of old men who worked at the publishing agency.
Oh wait, there was Mitchan, his editor, but that'd been a passing infatuation.
Plus, she had a progressing relationship with Ritsu. He'd been indifferent to their budding feelings at first, assuming they'd get over it but now it was serious. Does Mitchan know that Ritsu is a guy? Everything is always so unclear. Yet he had the feeling that she'd love him no matter what.
How that happened, he had no idea.
If only he could find someone adorable and cute to love him.
Alas, the misfortune of a single man.
No love, no sex and no life.
The three most horrible things to ever happen since the beginning of time.
Okay, the curse is bad, but not to the point of desperation!
He was so desperate. So very, very desperate.
Not only for carnal pleasures, but also for a story.
He needed something.
Okay, that's it! He'd have to resort to the most extreme measure of any man. He was going to pout.
Pouting places tremendous pressure on the muscles of the face and he'd have lines if he didn't control the extremities of such pouting. The perfect pout had been a practiced routine since childhood; gaining this ability had been his most cherished skill. He literally pouted until he got what he wished for.
Pouting – it had never failed him.
Then it began.
Shigure picked at his hakama and pouted for a full seven minutes until he realized no one was going to help him. He'd never, ever get help.
Well, it was probably because no one was there to see his irresistible pout.
Alright, he'd reached breaking point.
He'd tried the table technique, the sun technique, the memory technique and finally the pouting technique. There was no one to help. No one to hold him and tell him everything was okay. He'd have to cry his sorrows away in his room.
As Shigure pulled himself from the comfy cushion on which he had been residing, and started lumbering towards his room, a most wonderful sound greeted his ears.
"Shigure! Shigure, I'm finally here to help you in your time of need!"
It was Ayame.
He turned around and sunk back down onto the cushion. Ayame could talk some spirit into him!
Shigure waited patiently as he heard Ayame walk around the house in search of him. Replacing the pout that filled his face just moments before, Shigure awaited his arrival.
It was blinding, Ayame's entrance. The light reflected off of his white apparel and hair in a way that made Shigure squint and ruin his pout.
"Shigure!" Ayame rushed over and held him at arms length. He appeared to be taking in his appearance, which Shigure was sure was tousled and unappealing.
"Oh dear, you look horrible Shigure! Are you sure you didn't drink some wine? Your eyes are red and there's stubble on your chin!" Ayame definitely hadn't seen Shigure in such a state.
Always one to hold a charming appearance, Shigure held his own looks in high esteem. Never had there been a day where he didn't look perfect. He really was in trouble!
Shigure sniffled and pouted a little, this set Ayame's eyes alight.
"Come now Shigure, it can't be that bad! I brought some crackers – here." Shigure was handed the water crackers, the packet opened already as a dutiful friend would do for another.
The plane water crackers did nothing for his mood. Sure, they satisfied his hunger but surely they must be evil. They really had no flavour or any pretty colours; they didn't burst out into song like those seen on television advertisements. If crackers could grow legs and start singing, then surely he'd enjoy them more. Deciding to put these thoughts away, Shigure nibbled tentatively on the cracker, yep far too plain for his exquisite taste.
'Aya's always had a taste for the utterly bland' he thought to himself.
Shigure sat munching away as Ayame prepared a place to seat himself. The despondent silence frightened Ayame when he entered the usually cheerful home. This place had always been full of life and it now seemed as if it was some mournful wake.
It was uncomfortable.
Usually, the two cousins got along so well, laughing and merry-making like two drunken fools (which was usually the case).
Deciding to break the silence, Shigure let out a whine.
"Ayame, my life is going to ruins!" Slumping down as much as he could risk without paining his back, Shigure rested his head in his hands and almost wept. Seriously, his face would surely pay the price for such a horrid day. Next week he could have crows feet.
The giant shudder Shigure released only further worried his cousin.
"Shigure, I understand you're having trouble. Perhaps you should explain it in more detail because I really have no idea what all your crazed rambling was about." Ayame placed a comforting, well-manicured hand on Shigure's arm as he began his terrible tale.
"I'm so stuck Ayame. You must understand, you're a creator of wonderful things, just like me."
His silver haired cousin nodded his head in reaction to the compliment. It was the truth, there was no denying it. Ayame was simply born talented. "Go on…" Ayame prodded.
"Well, I can't think of a plot for the next book I have to write. This is terrible! It's the single most horrifying thing to have happened to me in my entire life!" Understatement, thought Ayame. If Shigure hadn't been drunk at the time, he'd remember that the most horrifying thing to happen in his life had been when he was with a female for the first time… and transformed. The whole city was sure to have heard that girl's scream.
"… I'm supposed to hand it in to Mitchan in four weeks and I can't think of anything to write about." Shigure grabbed Ayame's hands, "Won't you help me?"
Ayame could feel his heart break for his cousin. In times like these, Shigure had always provided him help and it was now time to return the favor. Of course, Shigure's 'problem' was a far cry from the extremely dangerous emergencies he's been through.
Well, he'd have to try, "Anything for you Shigure!"
What happened next would have been a picture perfect for a Hallmark card, were the participants not both male. Well, if Ayame was wearing a dress it wouldn't have been so bad.
Shigure in all happiness and excitement, took Ayame's face between his hands and brought their lips together in a kiss.
A kiss Ayame took far too seriously.
"Thank you so much Aya, you've made my day!" Almost immediately, Shigure raced from the room to fetch his notepad, leaving Ayame where he was.
Returning only a minute later, Shigure sat himself back in front of Ayame, Hello Kitty notepad and Pikachu pen at the ready.
"Okay… Go!" Shigure shouted.
Ayame only stared.
"And… Now!" Shigure certainly was expectant, his eager little eyes dancing around.
Okay, nothing was happening. NO sparkles or light bulbs popping up above Ayame's head. Hmm… this isn't like the movies said it would be.
Getting a bit confused, Shigure waved his hand in front of Ayame's face.
This seemed to gain attention as Ayame started and blinked furiously. So furiously, his eyes hurt after a moment.
"Shigure… ahh… what do you need help with?"
"Aya! You forgot already! That's such a terrible thing to do to your only cousin! I need a plot line for my next book!" Shigure rebuked.
"I'm not your only cousin Shii-chan, just your favourite." With a wink, Ayame leaned casually onto Shigure's side.
Of course Ayame knew what type of books Shigure usually wrote, so he needed some type of sexual, female-derogative story to tell his favourite cousin. Nothing came to mind. Well nothing that wouldn't put his cousin in jail.
"You can't think of anything can you?" Shigure seemed almost disappointed in him.
"Ahh, it's not that Shii-chan, it's just," Ayame struggle to think of an answer. Really, how demanding could his cousin get? "I think we should go get some ideas out in the town. Maybe later on tonight we can go out. I know the best spots in town. So how about -" Shigure butt in: terribly rude of him.
"No good Aya! I've thought of that, and it may have worked in the past, but it won't work now." His speech turned pleading, "Please help me Aya, I need you!" Shigure let out a high-pitched whine, one which for a normal man would not have been possible after puberty hit his throat.
Ayame knew he couldn't resist the puppy eyes in front of him, nor that ear-splitting sound of sadness. However, Shigure always got what he wanted because of those darn eyes. Ayame couldn't help but think it was a blatant abuse of their curse. Honestly, he'd never use his curse to such an advantage.
Okay, maybe a couple of time he'd been up a few girls' skirts but that was different. Well not really, but I digress.
Of course after this, Ayame's train of thought turned onto a different track from Shigure's.
His cousin's body felt so warm.
Snake like warmth and lots of it.
Mmm… Mine was never this warm.
All he could think of was his cousin's irresistibly adorable face, full and heated body, those cute eyes and pouty… lips.
In a moment he might regret soon after, Ayame leaned towards his cherisheble puppy then proceeded to give him a kiss of his own.
Shigure was shocked. Honestly, there was a beautiful person attached to his lips and it was Ayame. Who wouldn't be shocked?
What could have caused such a reaction from dear little Ayame?
Although it was unexpected, Shigure decided he could definitely get used to this again. One thing was for sure: the cure for his mind-block lay in his cousin's arms.
Now, Shigure also lay in his cousins arms as their kisses grew in intensity. Tentative touches came from Ayame in places Shigure hadn't had another person touch in what seemed like forever.
It was like he was a virgin all over again. Except, well, he would be sober and actually remember.
The passion grew and thoughts of books and tasteless crackers fled both minds as they focused only on each other.
Breaking apart, Ayame toned regretfully, "Shii-chanI'm sorry. I should have never-"
It seemed Shigure didn't agree with whatever Ayame was going to say as he claimed his lips in another kiss, this one much more aggressive than any of the last.
It appeared all thoughts of anything remotely sane had left Shigure's mind. Of course, it is questionable if he had ever been sane to begin with.
Ayame seemed unsure as he broke them apart yet again.
"Shigure, this wasn't supposed to happen. We cannot do thi-"
With a ferocious growl, Shigure bit at Ayame's neck like a possessed dog, claiming his possession. Why did that darn snake have to ruin the moment? Come on, the readers are trying to enjoy the lemon!
With a shout, Ayame brought his hands up behind Shigure and pulled him closer. It seemed Shigure had found his weak spot. Mmm… yes… lemon.
Unfortunately, happenings far too illicit for this website continued throughout the night and as the dark came ever closer, both Snake and Dog came closer also. This happened many, many times.
"You know Aya, you're the reason for my terrible addiction." Shigure commented as he lifted the cigarette from his mouth and released a large breath of white wispy smoke.
Ahh, the aftermath.
With a smirk the beautiful male splayed across his side returned a remark, "Well you're the reason I started making lingerie and other such delectable lines of clothing."
While Ayame snuggled into Shigure's chest, Shigure appeared to think hard. "I do look particularly good in a strapless bra, don't I?" he joked.
"I was thinking more along the lines of a French Maid outfit."
Shigure sat up at this.
"Really? I think I'd prefer to be the Master, you can be the servant."
The pair laughed aloud, enjoying each other's company. Unfortunately, the reality of the situation bore down hard after only a few moments. This… whole event was… crazy.
They fell into silence, both in guilt and despondency.
"Do you remember, Shigure? Only four years ago we promised each other we wouldn't continue with this… with us." Ayame stated forlornly.
Shigure sighed heavily, "Aya, we might have made stupid decisions in our life… but I don't ever regret being with you. Not when we were younger and definitely not now." It seems Shigure did possess some sort of sanity; if it was borderline crazy or not, is another question.
"What are we going to tell Ha'ri? He'll know the very minute he sees us." Ayame thought about the tall, dark, mysterious man they both knew very well
"I think," Shigure adopted a sly look at this point, "I'll surely get enough stimulus for my novel with you. However, I do think Ha'ri might add a little spice into this mix though; hopefully he won't mind re-creating our little threesome of musketeers. The Mabudachi Trio will… regain our previous habits."
They laughed an enjoyed the morning, just as they would enjoy many mornings to come.
Wow, corny ending, but I needed to finish this one-shot so badly.
I changed the ending heaps because my friend said it kind of sucked for the last few pages. It's all good. Understand this: Mine is very well Ayame's girlfriend, however we all know the force of lust. Think of Shigure and Ayame's relationship… As well as the future relationship of Shigure/Ayame/Hatori as an affair of sorts. My friend was angry that Ha'ri was apart of this sexual trio, as she wants him all for herself. Review.
Over and out,