A/N : Hey everyone! I used to write fanfiction ALL the time on here, and I haven't been here in forever. So, sorry. Although I don't even know if the same people are on here as much… Anyway, I was thinking about the scene where Edward calls in New Moon, desguised as Carlisle. Now, in the book Jacob answers the phone, but I wondered what might happen if Bella had answered…Enjoy.
Disclaimer : I do not own Twilight or any of it's characters. They are the work of the talanted Stephenie Meyer.
The phone rang, and I reached past Jacob to answer it.
"Hello?" I said absently. It was probably Charlie calling from the funeral home.
"Bella?" A voice answered. It rang with familiarity. Carlisle.
"Carlisle?" I verified.
"Yes. Bella, are you alright?"
"Um, yeah. Why do you ask?"
"Huh? Oh, I was just wondering. Alice had a vision is all… So how have things been going for you?" He continued in his slightly accented voice.
"Alright." I answered honestly.
"Oh yeah? Well, I'm glad to hear it."
I waited. I longed to ask the question that was burning on my lips. I wished I could find the courage. I took a deep breath and asked in a small voice, "How is Edward?" The name hurt to say, but I had to know. No matter how much pain I was in here, I had to know he was okay. Perhaps knowing he existed would ease my pain. Knowing I lived in a world where there was beauty and perfection.
"He's…well I don't really know Bella. I haven't seen him in forever. Since we…left, actually." He said quietly.
"But you and Charlie are okay, right?" He said a little louder.
"Yes." I whispered. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes, threatening to spill out at any moment.
"Bella?" He asked gently.
"And why not? What is it to you anyway?!" I snapped, and immediately regretted it. Edward was the one who left, not Carlisle. "Carlisle… I'm…sorry. I didn't mean-"
"No, no, Bella, it's alright. You're upset."
"Yeah. Well." I tried to change the subject.
"So, what have you been doing lately? Since…" he trailed off not wanting to upset me again.
"Nothing really. School, homework. Hanging out with some friends at La Push once in a while."
I looked up for the first time to see Jacob's reaction to this. He looked shaken, but under control, there was no danger.
"Okay. Well, that's nice. That you've been able to adjust…"
I laughed humourlessly. "Trust me Carlisle, it was never easy. Charlie can tell you that much."
The other end of the phone was quiet for a long while, and I wondered if he had hung up.
"How was it hard?" He asked, his voice pained. I could hear an edge to the melodic voice that was usually smooth and calm.
"It..." I felt the tearing through my gut again, the feeling I got whenever I thought of…him. "Carlisle," I said the name shakily, "it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I had to put on a show for Charlie, do well at school, make dinner, do laundry. All my normal chores, but I had to hide from him…. The… the pain. The pain that threatened to crush me. The knowledge there was no point to anything. No point in waking up in the morning…" Tears were spilling freely down my face now, there was no stopping it. I missed him. There was no avoiding it. "But he dosen't love me Carlisle, so what point would it make if he were here?"
The line was quiet for a considerable amount of time, the tears kept falling down my face.
"Bella." Jacob whispered. I shook my head.
"Bella?" Carlisle said.
"I think we should hang up now. As long as you and Charlie are okay."
"Right. Okay. Good."
"Carlisle?" I asked. Wiping the stray tears from my face. This was going to hurt me later, I knew it. But I had to ask it of him. I had to. "Could you maybe…tell Edward I said hi. You know, not that it'll mean much to him, but maybe he would like to know…" I trailed off, too pained to continue.
"Yes, Bella, I will tell him." He promised. The voice was pained now.
"Carlisle, are you okay? You sound funny…"
"Bella. It's not Carlisle." The voice said. The voice I had been dreading but also awaiting impatiently. The voice that was sure to cause me extensive pain later on.
"Bella." He breathed into the phone. "I'm so sorry."
"Edward." I said softly. "You don't have to be sorry. You did what you wanted. You got it. We're fine here." I told him, now embarrassed of what I told him when he was disguised as Carlisle.
"Bella, I never wanted this. Look. I'm coming back. I don't think I'm able to stay away much longer…" His voice broke, and if I didn't know better, I might have thought he was crying.
"You don't have to…" I felt fresh tears form in my eyes now.
"I do need you Bella. I've gone as long without you as I can stand."
I gulped, unsure of how to respond to that. "Alice is here." I confided.
"Alice. She's here."
"She went to you!? I can't believe she-" he cut himself off. "Just stay there with her Bella. I'll be there as soon as I can."
"Bye." I said unwillingly. I didn't want to let his voice go. I didn't want to hear the click of the other line, but I did. This was going to hurt later. Really badly.
"Bella, I have to go!" Jacob said urgently. "Will you be okay here?"
"Yes." I whispered. "Yeah, I think so."
He pulled me into a hug then. I didn't know what would happen, but I hope that somehow things would turn out. I walked numbly to the couch, lay down, and tried to fight against the pain that had began to overcome me. I didn't believe he still wanted me. There was no sense in that. He told me the exact opposite before he…left.
"Bella!" Alice cried as she ran back in the room. "Bella, are you alright?!" I nodded and continued to watch out the window, wondering if he would actually come or not.