A/N: I wanted to do this for so long already! A Harry Potter Naruto crossover. I'm fucking sending the Akatsuki to Hogwarts. Bwahahaha. I'm gonna pair one Akatsuki member with Sakura, but I don't know who yet. I'd like you all to help me with that… /\/\Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Harry Potter. Cause oh, if I did…
"GATHER YOU BASTARDS!" Leader's voice echoed through the halls of the Akatsuki hideout. "I HAVE A NEW MISSION!"
"IT'S FUCKING 2 AM!" Hidan's voice shouted back. "I WANNA SLEEP!"
"Ahh come on Hidan, let's just go…" Kakuzu muttered while dragging himself out of his bed. "He must have a very good reason to call us all this late…"
"He better." Muttering, Hidan followed his teammate to the office of the Leader, where all other Akatsuki members were standing in their pyjamas. Kisame was even holding a teddy bear.
Leader – of course the only one dressed in Akatsuki robes – looked at all the males in the room before sitting down in the shadows.
"Well then." He started. "I am sending you to Hogwarts for-"
"Isn't that a school?" Zetsu interrupted, his voice light. He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his green pyjamas, which was covered in yellow flowers.
"Yes, that's a school, a school for wizards and witches." Leader said sighing. "But. What I want is-"
"There's no way I'm going to a school, hm!" Deidara said loudly. His long, blond hair was a total mess.
"Tobi loves school!!" Tobi said in a happy voice. Even though they all had to hurry, he had still been able to manage his mask in front of his face before appearing.
"Can you all shut up?" Leader said, his eye twitching dangerously. He coughed and continued.
"We still need to murder Orochimaru. And it seems that he teamed up with some other snake-possessed bastard called Voldemort, who is threatening their world. He's probably weaker then a rock, but if we find him, we find Orochimaru."
Hidan stared at Leader with the expression of 'Is-this-why-I-had-to-get-out-of-bed?'.
"Now, the headmaster of that school, called Albus Dumbledore, knows our organisation exists out of a bunch of criminals. But in exchange for letting us stay in that school, we had to murder Voldemort as well."
"But, that will be easy then, right?" Kakuzu scratched his head. "You just said it yourself – he's weaker then a rock."
"No." Leader played with one of the many rings in his ear. "Well yes he is weak, but it seems he bound himself to the earth by splitting his soul or something. And I think we have to hurry, because, if Orochimaru learns how to do that, we have a problem."
Suddenly, he smirked.
"The positive thing though," he continued. "Is that the Kyuubi is on that school, together with his teammates 'Sai' and 'Sakura'. They are there to protect a boy named Harry Potter from Voldemort… And Orochimaru."
"Do you want us to take Naruto-kun?" Itachi asked. He was pretty much the only Akatsuki who looked normal; wearing a long black t-shirt and black shorts, instead of embarrassing pyjamas.
"Well, you have to see, that I had to promise we wouldn't hurt the Kyuubi vessel." Leader replied. "And they actually believed me on my word."
A couple of the dangerous Akatsuki men – in pyjamas – started to grin.
"If you murder Orochimaru before you get to that Voldemort, then just take the Kyuubi and get your asses back here. If you meet Voldemort on the way, stab a kunai through his head. It makes things easier."
"But what about them, the kid and his teammates, wont they attack us?" Zetsu asked. "If they do, can we kill them?" He added with a darker voice.
"They wont, because I spoke with Copy Ninja Kakashi about it, and we wont harm each other until our missions are over." Leader explained. "It seemed that he believed me as well. Konoha shinobi are so stupid…"
"Sir Leader?" Kakuzu scratched his head. "We're men. How can men go to school?"
"That's the next thing." Leader nodded at Kakuzu. "Itachi, Deidara, Tobi – without his mask, though – and Hidan would be just okay for seniors at Hogwarts. They also don't need a lot of changing. Maybe only a little younger. But Kisame, Zetsu, Kakuzu… You wouldn't fit in a school."
Deidara sniggered, causing Kisame to glare at him.
"Why not?" Hidan asked, trying not to laugh as well.
"Kisame is too big, and… blue." Leader glanced at Kisame for a moment. "Zetsu's black with white and has an enormous flytrap. And Kakuzu's literally held together."
Zetsu's dark side muttered some offending words, which Leader totally ignored.
"Now," Leader stood up. "Itachi, Kisame, Deidara, Tobi and Hidan will go around as students. Kakuzu, you'll be the assistant in the hospital ward. And as for Zetsu…"
Everyone looked at Zetsu, who frowned.
"… It seemed best if someone like you stayed in the background." Leader finally said.
Zetsu immediately started muttering against himself; even if lighter half seemed offended. Kisame, Hidan and Deidara grinned, while Tobi petted Zetsu on his arm.
"You'll stay at the office of the headmaster. If one of the others finds something out, he'll report it to you, and you'll write everything down. So actually, you'll be in charge."
Zetsu immediately seemed happier, and grinned back at Kisame, Hidan and Deidara, who became very interested in their fingernails and the ceiling.
"Tomorrow, you'll go to London." Leader continued. "At station 9¾ you'll take the train to Hogwarts. There Albus Dumbledore will help you with more things. I want you to report to Zetsu every Saturday, and then Zetsu reports to me. Understood?"
They all nodded.
"How long will this mission take?" Itachi asked, his voice as calm as ever.
"The longest is most likely a year."
"WHAT!?" Deidara stared at his Leader. "That long, hm!?"
"Yes, Deidara, that long. Now go get some more sleep, you'll need it." Leader turned around and left the room.
"You're the one who woke us up, you bastard!" Hidan yelled after him.
Harry Potter and the S-ranked Shinobi
The New Mission
"Why is your bag so small? We'll be gone for a year."
"I don't have personal belongings I care for, unlike you and your teddy bear, Kisame."
Hidan laughed, seeing Kisame get practically dissed by Itachi.
They were all standing outside, dressed in their Akatsuki wear, some bags and suitcases in their hands. Leader came walking up to them.
"Good, you're all ready." He said. "This following jutsu is one you all know, and the most easy thing to remove, but I want you all to stay like this until I tell you something else. Itachi, you first."
Itachi stepped up to the Leader, who did a couple of easy hand seals. When the smoke was gone, Itachi was still standing there. The only difference was that he was a little shorter and his face looked a little younger.
The only ones who had a big change were Kisame and Kakuzu. Kisame turned a lot shorter (even though he was still the tallest), his face turned more 'human' and his skin colour went normal, only it still had a slight blue glance.
Kakuzu's eyes turned from white on black to black on white, and the stitches through his whole body were unable to see any longer.
"Deidara, I want you to wear gloves all the time." Leader added. "And Tobi, remove your mask when the school year starts."
Tobi and Deidara nodded and Leader turned to the rest.
"I will hear from you soon." With that, he disappeared.
"Well, let's just go then." Hidan muttered.
"Naruto, stay a little calm, they promised not to hurt you!"
"I know, Sakura-chan, but still, do you really trust them!?"
"I don't, but they have their own goal: killing Orochimaru and Voldemort. They aren't able to succeed in that if they go after you."
"Y- yeah, I guess… Sai, what the hell are you doing!?"
"I'm drawing, dickless-wonder."
"COULD YOU STOP CALLING ME LIKE THAT!?"
"DON'T YELL NARUTO!"
Sakura punched Naruto.
"Ouch! S-sorry, Sakura-chan…"
They were waiting outside of King's Cross station. Since the Akatsuki didn't know how to get to station 9¾, they had to wait for them and show it.
"I can't believe that we have to work with them." Naruto muttered. "They all want me dead! Sasuke's evil brother!"
"There's nothing we can do about it." Sakura said sighing. "And- hey, there they are!"
Naruto and Sai looked up, and, indeed, saw the group approach them.
"Um." Naruto whispered. "They look… different."
"I thought Hoshigaki Kisame was blue?" Sai asked out loud.
Naruto just wanted to reply when Hidan spoke up.
"Oy, you." The Jashin-follower said. "What are you guys fucking waiting for?"
"You." Sakura narrowed her eyes at him. "We'll guide you to the station."
"No offence, pinky, but this is the station." Hidan spat.
Naruto rolled his eyes and Sai fake-smiled.
"Just follow us." He said.
Team Kakashi went into the station, the Akatsuki-members following. Zetsu, who didn't look different then always, got the most stares. A little girl even replied to her mother that she wanted him as a pot plant in her room. Tobi quickly had to pull Zetsu along, who looked like he wanted to eat her.
"Here we are." Sakura said when they reached station 9 and 10. "Follow us."
She took both Naruto and Sai's hand, looked around, and went straight through the wall.
"What the-" Hidan stared at the wall, who looked the same as before. "But how-?"
"Just go." Itachi walked towards the wall and disappeared as well.
One by one, some doubting (Kakuzu), and some cheerful (Tobi), they entered the station 9¾, where team Kakashi was still waiting.
"All through?" Sakura asked.
"Yeah, I guess." Kisame muttered.
"Then we'll see you at Hogwarts." Sakura turned around and followed Sai to the bright red train that was waiting for them
There weren't any others on the station to go aboard, but that was only because the school year hadn't started yet.
"Sakura-chan, wait up!" Naruto rushed after her.
"Come on, let's find ourselves a seat as well, hm." Deidara said, turning to his fellow members. "I don't think she wants us to sit with her."
A/N: Yeah, that's it. Please leave a review; I need to know if it sucks! xD