A/N: This came to me at about 2:30 in the morning . . . you have been warned.

Disclaimer: all! Of these characters don't belong to me : ( They are property of the great J. K but hay, I can dream can't I.

Pairing: HG/DM, HG/Many people

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Hermione stared blanky at the white ceiling in her therapists office, waiting for her weakly evaluation. She didn't even know why she bothered, it always went the same way. Dr. Banks would ask questions, she would answer, he would call her a nympho and she would slam his door on her way out. (unless she was asked to stay for a follow up (in otherwords, he was a horny therapist.)

Hermione just couldn't accept that she was a nympho, she was after all, "Hermione – know – it – all – bookworm, and a prude. Well at least until Harry and Ron's deaths, just over a year ago, and barely a week apart from each other.

No, NO, NO! She told herself, she was not going to think about them, that lead her into a deep depression that she was recently getting out of. As she was trying to calm herself, Dr. Banks came into the room with a smile fixed onto his face.

" Ah, good-morning Miss Granger." "How-"

But Hermione interrupted "Cut the bullshit!" (A/N: I just love a violent Hermione)

Mr. Banks smile never faltered as he continued un phased, "How many people have you slept with this week Miss Granger?" Hermione grimaced; he had tried to get her down to one a week. Ha! Never gonna happen. Or so she thought.

Nevertheless, Hermione mentally calculated:

Monday - After evaluation, Dr. Banks

Tuesday – Draco, always her favorite, he didn't expect anything, and was a very good lay

Wednesday – Victor, Ginny, Fred

Thursday – Dean, Pansy (She was desperate and extremely horny)

Friday – Fred and George at the same time

Saturday – Draco (About ten times)

Sunday – It is the holy day, so none tonight

" Only 9," She smirked, "Including you." Dr. Banks didn't reply, but he looked thoughtful for a moment. "Miss Granger, we are going to try something new today. Are you up for that?" Dr. Banks Asked.

"What you mean like fucking at your house instead of here?" Hermione asked confused but excited.

"No! Just lay on the couch."

Hermione did as she was told, waiting for him to continue in his instructions.

"Are you quite comfortable, miss granger?"

She shrugged, and he started to explain what they were going to do.

"Now, I am going to say a word, and you say the first thing that pops into your mind, no matter what it is. Ok? Easy enough isn't it?"

"Let's begin." She nodded her agreement.

Apple - - Pie

Crayon - - Color

Blue - - Balls (Hermione got red)

Suck - - . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

"Miss Granger is there a problem?"

"Yeah this is stupid and I don't want to answer your stupid questions!"

"Do you want to get better or not?!!"

"Fine."

Dr. Banks relaxed an re positioned himself in his chair. "Now, where were we? Oh yes."

Suck - - Hermione couldn't think of a lie quick enough so she sucked it up and spoke: "I would love to Doctor." (Hermione covered her mouth quickly.) Dr. Banks smirked then continued.

"Ahem" Dr. Banks coughed.

Chocolate - - Smeared all over my body (again Hermione was extremely shocked)

Drink - - Yes please, I'll take a Cosmo

"Now let's see Miss Granger"

Love - - Dra- . . . (Hermione looked very shocked and so did Dr. Banks) I- I mean there is no s-such thing f-for me, Hermione stammered.

Dr. Banks wrote something down in his notebook, then said, "Let's continue shall we?"

Hate - - Dra- . . . I mean there is no such ting for me (Hermione quickly looked away.) "Very interesting Miss Granger." Dr. Banks said, and scribbled in his notebook hurriedly. "What?" Said Hermione.

"Well, it seems as if we are done for today." Dr. Banks smiled and escorted her out of the room. "Maybe we should try this house thing."

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A/N: This is only my second story ever, so please read and review, with any advice or constructive criticism. And also, I am looking for someone to be an editor or to help out with any mistakes I might have missed. Thanks: )