Hello there childrens! MEC here! I would just like to say how excited I am to be posting my FIRST EVER ZaDR fan fiction here for all of you to read!

First though I would like to say how much flames IRK me! If you're a homophobe or just someone who doesn't like ZaDR why the hell are you here reading this!? Huh!? Why don't you just get a big stamp and let me pound 'STUPID' into your forehead for you!? That set aside though, those of you who DO like it I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

A/N: Most of these chapters are shorter than I'm used to writing but that is for a few reasons. First, my attention span SUCKS. It really does. I can get more done in shorter spurts than I can by working on and off on one big chapter. Also that means I get more chapters out in time. So far I have five chapters total writen up and it only took me about a week to do it. So YOU get more plot out of this story in a short amount time and aren't waiting forever to find out what happens.

That SAID, do not pressure me for a chapter every other day. How quickly I submit depends on YOU, my readers! I won't update unless I get at least five reviews per chapter! Now I'm not that picky when it comes to reviews. But I LOVE constructive reviews! Love THEM! Those make me want to write more and faster! But if you don't feel like it or don't know of anything constructive to say that's fine, anything is good really.

WARNINGS: (so you can't say I didn't warn you.) ZADR! Mentions of torture, mentions of rape, the illigal administering of drugs to minors, and I'm just going to be unpleasent to all your favorite characters, 'kay? (Now review me with the name of your favorite character so I can be unpleasent to them. -wink-) And this is just the crap I know about. Future warnings will be added as needed, but if you can take this stuff you should be fine.


Five years….

It had been five years since he'd left. And now, now he was back, but nothing was the same.

The first thing he noticed was his base, which he had left right where it was, was covered in various vines. The tree in the front yard had grown a bit bigger as well. He left it out in front the last time he needed Gir out of the way and it had apparently taken root in the ground. A bunch of gnomes had chips missing from them and one was gone completely. Where it could have gotten to he didn't know, and really he didn't care.

He had everything cleaned up and fixed Gir who had been broken when he left, dismantled completely and left sitting on the couch. He instantly regretted it when he received a happy screech and a death hug but knew he'd regret it more if he didn't. The silence of the defective SIR unit's absence would have slowly driven him insane.

Well… more insane.

After everything was fixed which took him a good six months to accomplish, he decided to try and blend in with human society again. He was smarter about it this time, having finally learned from his past mistakes.

His disguise this time was created by having Gir go out and gather a variety of human fashion magazines which were loaded into his much more advanced computer.

When he stepped out of the pod he had lightly tanned skin, deep blue contacts, turned violet with the red of his normal eyes, short, black hair, choppy in the back with long bangs that he had to constantly sweep behind his fake ears.

When he went back to school, now entering high school, where Dib would be, he discovered why various people on TV. used the term 'head turning' to describe good looking, as most of the females, and a few of the males, in the halls couldn't seem to take their eyes off of him, causing a lot of them to run into open locker doors, polls, walls, and sometimes other people.

It was then that he noticed the biggest change of all.

"Where is the Dib?" Zim asked, hand raised. He was SURE this was the class Dib was supposed to be in, that was the whole reason he was even there!

Murmurs spread across the class along with a few giggles and annoyed eye rolling.

"Dib, unfortunately," The teacher, an obvious relation to Ms. Bitters, said. "Is no longer with us."

Zim tuned out the rest of the lessons for the rest of the day, too preoccupied with trying to figure out what that meant.

He decided after school he would check up at the Dib house. He would surely find some answers there.

Zim knocked on the door, which opened barely a second later.

"Who the hell are you?" Gaz asked, gripping the knob tightly with obvious annoyance.

"Where is the Dib?" Zim asked, almost reaching out to grip the scary sister's shoulders but thinking better of it.

"I'm going to see him now." Gaz said, squinting open an eye in recognition. That voice… so annoying, yet so familiar. "Why do you care, ZIM?"

"Can I go too?" Zim asked, ignoring the question.

Gaz just grunted and shrugged, walking over to her shiny new car she had received for her sixteenth birthday. She hopped into the driver's side and started it up, waiting almost patiently for Zim. Who knew? Maybe Zim came back to kill her brother, then she wouldn't have to visit him in place of their overly busy father.

Zim got in the passenger's side and put his seat belt on as the car pulled out of the drive-way. He had been in enough skull crushing accidents and had a feeling Gaz would not be merciful if they got into a crash.

He watched out the window as they drove, memorizing the directions to get to where ever they were going so he wouldn't have to ask Dib's scary sister for a ride.

It took about a half an hour to reach their destination and he shuddered at the sight of the pure white building. He recognized this place, not this place specifically, but all of these types of buildings looked the same. In fact they all kind of reminded him of the evil school inside Dib's monster world inside his head.

The sign out front read, "Akrham's Institute for the Mentally Unstable."

Zim took a minute to gape as Gaz got out of the car and waited for him. He shook himself out of his state and got out to follow her up the stone sidewalk and into the lobby.

Gaz showed the lady at the front desk and I.D. and explained that Zim was with her and she opened the door to the rest of the institute for them.

Zim followed Gaz through the maze like institute, his head darting back and forth at the various drooling humans that walked the halls until they got to another desk with another door that had to be unlocked electronically for them.

After a bit more walking they came to a stop at a door which Gaz used her I.D. to unlock and they walked in.

The room was dark and there were no windows which instantly left Zim feeling depressed.

What was WRONG with his human?

There was one chair which Gaz instantly took up and started to play her video game, one small table next to a hospital bed where a lanky teen was restrained, hands and feet cuffed to the railing on either side. He was wearing a pair of what looked like thin hospital scrubs and was staring blankly up at the ceiling as if no one had walked in at all.

"What's wrong with him?" Zim asked Gaz quietly.

"He's insane," Gaz stated simply, never looking up from her game.

"No, I mean, why is he acting like that?" Zim pushed, though trying to sound as respectful as possible so as not to bring on one of her famous doomings.

"It's his medication," Gaz said, pulling a bag of chips from her purse. "Keeps him quiet and numb so he doesn't start screaming about aliens or big foot or something."

"How did he end up here?"

"Why do you care?"

Zim kept his mouth shut after that, walking up to the human lying on the bed but receiving no acknowledgment.

After a moment of silence Gaz finally relented the answer. "Since you left Dib started acting crazier than normal. He'd go by your house at least once a day, trying to find out what you were planning. After a year had gone by Dad started taking notice in Dib's behavior and started sending him to a psychiatrist. A few months after that the doctor told Dad of a great therapist that Dib should see and a few months after that Dad and the therapist starting planning a way to try and get Dib to accept the fact that you weren't an alien. They told him they had tracked you down to a hospital some where in Japan where they were treating your skin condition. They pulled all sorts of things, e-mails from you and the hospital, talking face to face with doctors, and even finding a kid that looked kind of like you and painting him a faded green like the treatments were working." Gaz said all this, never missing a beat on her game but eventually paused it and set it aside to finally take a good look at Zim who had a look of deep concentration on his face.

She went on, "After a year of this he started to believe it and Dad convinced him to start studying real science again. The result was about the same as last time, Dib felt his life was dull again only this time there was no you to chase around again. Eventually he started to have actual hallucinations, swearing up and down that he saw you standing across the street, mocking him. But when he went to chase you down you were gone and he'd go into fits. Eventually those stopped but he became depressed to the point of self mutilation and, soon after, he started having fits again. He went back and forth between believing he was insane and trying to convince himself that he wasn't. It became so bad that Dad had him admitted here and put under this new treatment, what you see now."

She finished with an uncaring grunt and went back to her games.

Zim came closer to Dib and moved the boy's arm a bit to see the scares of said self mutilation.

He felt instant guilt. How could he have done that, left without saying anything. A simple good-bye could have prevented this.

A small whimper escaped the human's throat though nothing changed on his face.

He was running, running as fast as his legs could carry him but it wasn't enough and soon he was captured again, a long tentacle like arm wrapping both of his behind his back and dragging him back, kicking and screaming.

"Quit your noise making, you know it does no good." The monster said to the scythe-haired human.

"LET GO!" He screamed, pulling and twisting as he was dragged back to the ugly nightmare world school.

His entire body was cut and bruised and everything fucking HURT! Since that first injection at the mental hospital two years ago his body lay prone in the human world while his mind was trapped in the nightmare world where he was tortured and beaten severely.

Sometimes, when the nurses went off schedule, he would start to wake up and could escape for a few minutes, letting his mind escape the cruelty of his nightmare world but it was never enough. Eventually a doctor or someone would notice and he would be pulled back down into the world of monsters inside of his head.

As he was being strapped back down he could feel himself fading once more. They were late again. Twice in one week was rare but the pain he was experiencing was leaving him and he didn't care! He would be able to escape!

As the pain lifted his heart sank when he felt the real hands on his arm. They were going to put him under again! So soon!

He let a whimper escape his throat that caused the hand on his arm to twitch a bit but no needle came.

The hand was tracing patterns on his arm, small lines that tingled and occasionally overlapped each other. Must be his cut marks. He felt ashamed of those and another small noise escaped him.

"Dib?" A soft voice asked.

Soft. He liked that. He hadn't hear his name said with such softness since… since… Hell, he couldn't even remember.

He let out a noise of acknowledgment and his fingers twitched a bit.

Who ever it was that was touching him noticed this and said his name with a little more urgency.

Who was that? The voice seemed familiar but he couldn't place it. He knew he SHOULD know this person, but he just couldn't think. His head was swimming and he felt like he was passing out, but backwards.

Zim moved his hand to grip Dib's and shook it a little, encouraging him to fight the drug. He wanted his human back, the same human that chased him up and down the neighborhood, who threw water balloons at him, who swore to have his organs spread out across an autopsy table.

He wanted Dib back.

The human's eyes shifted a bit towards him and he felt his chest swell until he heard Gaz come up behind him and let out an annoyed noise. "Not again," She said before moving to the door and calling for a nurse.

One quickly came and pushed a startled and confused Zim out of the way and jabbed a needle into Dib's arm.

Dib squeaked in protest but he was quickly thrust back into his nightmare world, his body once more limp and useless in the real world.

"Come on," Gaz said, grabbing Zim's arm and dragging him out of the room. "Time's up, I want to go home."

Zim let Gaz drag him out of the institute and back into the car.

The ride back to Dib's house was quiet, just like the ride to the institute only this time Zim had one more question to ask.

"You know he isn't crazy, right?"

"What, about you being an alien?" Gaz asked back, glancing at Zim who nodded. "Of course, any moron could see that. But you were never a threat, so what do I care?"

Zim looked down in his lap, more questions coming with that answer but he decided to keep quiet.

Gaz had the decency to drop Zim off at his house before going back home which Zim thanked her for, seeing rain clouds approaching. He dragged himself into his house and over to the couch which he slumped down onto and moped. This had not gone how he wanted. Not at all. He had to think of a way to get Dib back. He had to.

Zim cried out as his arm was cut into, deeply, and something was removed. It was his self destruct mechanism, designed for when an invader was captured with no way of escape. Whoever these aliens were, they knew what they were doing as it only took them a minute to find exactly where to cut. He tried to look around, to see his attackers but it was useless, there was a bright light in his face and all he could make out were silhouettes all jumbled together.

"Who are you!" He cried as another alien put their hands on his arm, using a cloth to soak up the blood.

"Quiet Zim, now, we know you've been in contact with Prisoner number 777. We want you to help us get him out." A voice said, one that Zim immediately recognized from when he was a military scientist.

"Lard-Nar?" He asked, amazed the small Vortian was still alive.

"Yes, Zim. Now tell us what we want to know!" Lard-Nar shouted, slamming his fist on something.

"I don't know how to break 777 out!" Zim shouted back. "If I did I'd have already had him out for my own uses!"

"You lie! You are an irken invader! You must know something! If you don't tell us we can always pry it out of you!"

"I swear, I don't kno-!" Zim choked, the punch to his gut shutting him up and knocking the wind out of him.

Lard-Nar laughed. He was going to enjoy this so much. Finally, pay back for getting his designs for the irken flag-ship thrown out.

Zim could hear something whirring in the back ground, the sound causing his antennae to go back in annoyance. The sound only grew closer though and there was a brief moment of pain in his abdomen before he blacked out.

He awoke with a start, gasping for breath. He had always hated dreams; he always found it so useless to replay memories like that, especially painful ones.

He wiped his forehead though he hadn't been sweating and got off the couch, wondering when he had even fallen asleep in the first place. Sighing and deciding the think about it later he went into the kitchen and grabbed an irken cola, hoping it would help calm his nerves.

He had always thought it would be exciting until that very moment, to be captured by an alien race and tortured for information, only to escape, go home, and be praised for not having talked but instead he had been brutally tortured with no hope of escape and no way to end it. It had only been luck that the Massive had gotten within range of the Vortian ship's scanners and everyone started to panic, giving him just enough of a chance to escape.

But it hadn't been easy. On his way out he ran into a couple of screw-heads. The creatures were especially resentful towards the irken race due to all of the slave labor that was loaded upon them. They weren't that bad at fighting either and to make things worse he was injured, they weren't.

That encounter was one he never wanted to have to go through ever again. His pak had been badly damaged decreasing his ability to fight off infection.

But he made it onto one of their small cruisers and fled to the Massive where, he was sure, he would get sanctuary.

No luck.

The Tallest had been less than inviting and, instead of his reward of riches and glory, he was banished. Banished to Earth forever.

He floated numbly through space towards Earth after that when something in him snapped, like a rubber band pulled to tight. Suddenly it all came together! Why he hadn't seen it before was beyond him but now he could see! It was all so clear!

The Tallest had never wanted him to conquer Earth! They were hoping he'd get lost in space and float forever on some fake mission! All the laughing, the giggling when they thought he wouldn't notice!

They didn't think he could do it at all!

Well he would show them… oh the showing he would do!

He would conquer Earth, but he wouldn't claim it for the Irken Empire, oh no, he would claim it for himself! It would be HIS kingdom! HIS EARTH!

But first he needed the one thing he couldn't live without. The Dib.

As Zim was having his little moment of clarity he realized something else. He NEEDED the Dib-thing. He knew with all of his past plans, even with out the Dib always foiling them, he would never have been able to destroy man kind.

Also, he had to admit, Dib was so much smarter and open minded than the other pathetic stink beasts of Earth. An intelligence of his nature deserved to be appreciated and he felt a sudden rage for the Earth children who had mocked HIS big-head human, even if it was beneficial to him.

He sighed and leaned against the counter, sipping his soda. He hadn't learned until his base was once more operational and he was testing the med bay by having the computer run a physical on him that his sudden intelligence was due to the damage his pak had taken while he was escaping the wrath of the screw-heads.

He checked the clock on the wall of his now normal looking but still weirdly colored kitchen. It was nine in the morning. He wanted to visit the human again but he just remembered that he would need an ID like Gaz had to get in. He sighed. This, he knew, was going to test his still strong irken pride on a whole new level and he would have to steal himself for the lesson of humility he was sure to need to endure.

"What?" He asked, rubbing the antennae under his wig to make sure he heard right.

"I SAID," Gaz said in an irritated voice. "That I would get Dad to sign for you to get your own ID."

"Why would you do that?" Zim asked as Gaz led him into the living room.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you not to look a gift horse in the mouth?" Gaz asked, stopping at the top on the stairs that led into her father's basement lab.

"I thought we were talking about IDs, not horses." Zim said making sure to stay out of punching range.

"Never mind," Gaz said, giving up. "If YOU have an ID then that means I won't have to go visit Dib once a week anymore and you get to see Dib, for whatever reason you'd want to see him, everyone wins, get it?"

"Dib doesn't seem to be winning anything from this." Zim pointed out, earning a threatening look from Gaz.

"Just stay here." She growled before stomping down into her father's lab.

She came up a half an hour later with a slip of paper in her balled up hand which she handed to him.

"Here, this has my father's signature, this'll get you an ID allowing you to see Dib and only see Dib. That's all this thing can be used for so don't even TRY breaking into anything with it."

Zim just nodded, grabbing the paper and looking at it almost happily. "Thank you." He said quickly before running out of the home and all the way to the institute.