This has been the most difficult chapter for me to write.

Reasons chapter 13


Hellyeah - You Wouldn't Know

You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to,

Everything I've been through.

Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine,

And smile your whole life,

I wouldn't know

18 wheels are rolling,

18 wheels are crushing,

Me down,

Running me down

Cars are crashing

Cars are crashin', all around me,

Running me down,

All my days are numbered,

All my days are gray,

All my skies are covered,

All my ends are frayed,

You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to,

Everything I've been through. You wouldn't know

Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine,

And smile your whole life,

I wouldn't know

Lightning's crashin'

Thunder's rolling all around me,

Bringing me down

Stars are falling,

Fires lighting all around me,

Burning me down

All my days are numbered,

All my days are gray,

All my skies are covered,

All my ends are frayed,

You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to,

Everything I've been through. You wouldn't know

Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine,

And smile your whole life,

I wouldn't know

Feels like I'm falling down,

Inside a fever rising,

Buried my life deep in the ground,

Left my existence lying, so lets go

You couldn't be, you couldn't be me even if you wanted to,

Everything I've been through.

Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine,

And smile your whole life,

I wouldn't know

What Potter had just said sent Snape over the edge. Snapping, he did something out of character for him. He charged right at his rival while yelling, "You stay away from her!" James was knocked to the ground with a thud. A physical attack was something he hadn't expected. "She'll never go out with you!" Severus was now astride James, his hands gripping the front of Potter's robe slamming him into the floor several times. In self-preservation James began to fight back, but Severus' anger gave him strength he normally didn't have. The boys were in an all out brawl when Professor Slughorn, who had been trying to break through the spell on the room ever since he first heard the yelling, broke into the potions classroom. Snape appeared to have the upper hand. That hand was raised up to strike Potter who was on bottom again. Before he could strike, Severus' arm was held back by the old professor.

"Severus!" Slughorn shouted as he yanked Snape off of Potter. "Mr. Snape, you go to far. Control yourself."

Snape's face was covered in embarrassment. He had told Slughorn he could control his emotions, and now look where he'd ended up. If Severus wasn't the image of Tobias Snape, ready to use physical violence, he didn't know what was. "I - - " Snape couldn't look Slughorn in the eyes or try to explain how things had gotten out of hand. The only thing the Slytherin boy could think to do was run. Not run away, thought it looked that way, but to run and find Lily. He had to warn her. Potter had every intention, Snape believed, of only seducing her, when Potter meant 'win her' love. As if Lily was a prize to go to the victor or their rivalry.

An evil thought crossed Sev's mind. 'If he does just use her as he's used others, I'll be there to pick up the pieces.' He shook his head to banish the thought. 'No, I can't let that happen. I've got to warn her.'

Severus looked a bit like a lunatic as he ran through the castle halls, trying to figure out where Lily was. When he saw her walking with some of her Gryffindor friends he ran for her. All the other girls jumped back as Snape nearly ran them down. "Lily, I've got t talk to you."

Arms crossed, head shaking, Lily was not pleased. "I told you, I'm not talking to you."

"But you have to."

"Have to?"

"It's important."

This time Mary McDonald stepped in. She pushed Severus back form her friend with the palm of her hand. "She said she isn't talking to you Sniv."

"But out prune face," Snape blurted out.

"Severus!" Lily condemned. "Don't call her that."

"She's got no right to butt in. This is between us."

"There is nothing between us," Lily spat out. "So I'll be saying good day Mr. Snape." She turned and her friends fell in line behind her.

"Liiiiiils," Sev whined.

The Gryffindor girl turned back giving Snape 'the look'. "I said good day Mister Snape."

'Mister Snape?' Severus couldn't believe his ears. Lily had just addressed him as 'Mister'.

It was about that time that the head of Slytherin found his wayward charge. "Mr. Snape." Slughorn huffed and puffed trying to catch his breath. "Have you gone mad?"

"I've gone something - - " escaped from Snape's lips.

"You were supposed to be making peace with Mr. Potter or scaring him at the most, not drugging him up and belting him. Dumbledore is going to have a fit. Never mind McGonagall."

"Dumbledore - - McGonagall - - " Severus was swaying as if he were going to pass out. The jig was up. Still, James Potter and Sirius Black had done worse, and they hadn't been expelled. Maybe it would be all right. "I didn't plan to - - It just - - "

Slughorn was actually sympathetic. "I know. I know you didn't plan it, but it still happened. As bad as I feel for you, I'm not sure I can trust you right now."

"Sir - - "

"Maybe I don't know you as well as I think."

"Sir - - "

"I'm going to have to figure out something to keep McGonagall from trying to get you expelled after this."

"You're - - " Snape was amazed. "Still willing to stick up for me, Sir?"

"That I am. Don't ask me why, but I am." Slughorn grabbed the shoulder of Severus' robes, and began dragging him back towards the dungeons. When there were no other students to hear him he said something that surprised the boy. "I'm even willing to cover for you."


"I'm going to have to cover my own hide as well. May as well take care of it all in one swoop."

"Sir, what have you got to cover? I'm the one that did it."

The head of Slytherin house's eyes were as angry as Snape had ever seen them. Slughorn's voice remained even. He did not get loud. "A ministry controlled substance? Are you really that stupid Severus?"

He knew the question was rhetorical, but Snape answered, "No, just that desperate."

Reaching the potions classroom Snape was surprised to see that Potter appeared as if there were no ill effects of his attack on him. Severus blurted out, "You're not hurt?"

"You think a scrawny scratter like yourself could hurt me? Caught me off guard is all."

"Mr. Potter," Slughorn reprimanded. "You're not here to insult Mr. Snape."

"I wasn't here to be attacked by him either."

"No, you were here to be punished for attacking me," Snape now chimed in. "How quickly you forget."

"I don't think that's going to matter much when Professor Dumbledore finds out about your latest deed. Slytherin House is in for it now."

Snape and Slughorn looked at each other as the Gryffindor boy continued to jabber. "Snape will be expelled; and you Professor Slughorn giving him veritaserum? The ministry will want to hear about that, I'm sure."

"Excuse me Mr. Potter." Slughorn wasn't sure he'd heard right. He was learning James Potter wasn't as innocent as everyone believed, and what it was like to be on his bad side. "You think 'I' gave Mr. Snape the truth serum?"

"I know you did, all you Slytherin are alike."

The potions master chuckled. "Thank you Mr. Potter."

James looked at Slughorn as if he had not been listening. "You're thanking me? I'm about to get you sacked."

"I'm thanking you for making my way so much easier."

"Easier for you to retire before the headmaster can dismiss you?"

"And here I was feeling sorry for you. You're just as slippery as my Mr. Snape now aren't you?"

While Potter was contemplating Slughorn's last statement, the professor's wand was out in a flash and he was charming, "Half an hour's time Obliviate."

Potter stood there, his finger still waggling in Slughorn's face, but he forgot what it was there for. He didn't even remember getting there. He blinked, and saw the other boy. "What are you doing here Snape? Professor, you said he wasn't to be here today."

"So I did," Slughorn said before Severus could open his mouth. "Something has come up. I am dismissing you from this detention today. I believe there's a quidditch practice you're missing."

"Yeah, there is." Without further convincing James was gone.

Slughorn breathed a sigh of relief. He picked up the parchment that James had started at the original beginning of the detention. Then he glanced down at the two bottles on the floor; one fire whiskey, one potion. Snape knew it couldn't be as easy as that after what he had done. He was right.

"Severus, Severus, Severus - - " Slughorn shook his head each time he said the boy's name. "Do you understand the seriousness of what you have done today?"

Severus nodded silently. A tear escaped the corner of one of his eyes. Was he sorry for what he had done, or sorry he'd heard the truth. James was after Lily, and Lily was still to mad at him to see strait.

The head of Slytherin continued to lecture the boy who would grow into the man who would step into his own shoes six years later. "I don't want to have to explain all of this to Professor Dumbledore, but I'm not about to allow you to get off scott free." Snape wondered just what Slughorn was going to do. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to take something that matters to you."

Severus was silently thinking about what the teacher didn't know. Someone had beaten him to it. 'What does that matter to me? Potter has already taken the only thing that matters to me.'

It was through that fog that Snape heard the words, "I believe you young people call my little get-togethers the slug club." The boy focused on the teacher's voice now. "Mr. Snape, you will no longer be welcome at those gatherings."

This was something some people wouldn't consider a punishment, but at that time it did mean something to Severus. Being part of the slug club meant you were a somebody. He was part of Slughorn's because of his skills, not because of whom he was related to or what he could appropriate for the greedy man. He was part of that crowd, despite what that crowd thought of him, because Slughorn respected him. Was he going to loose that respect as well?

"Let me add, that I will be keeping a much closer eye on you Lad. Think of your house, there are only seventeen days left of this term, we can't afford to loose any more points, granted next to the quidditch team, you've gained us the most, but if Dumbledore found out about this little stunt I think we'd end up in the negative column."

Was that really all Slughorn cared about? Weather his house was on top this year? "Look at me Lad."

Snape finally took his eyes off the floor. "I want your word, Slytherin to Slytherin that you will be on your best behavior until the end of term, or I will have to do something serious."

Wondering what Slughorn meant by serious, Severus nodded his head in agreement and submission. He understood just how lucky he was not to be being sent home that instant. Even if he failed, he was determined to live up to that promise. Severus' intentions always seemed better than what his actions ended up being.

"Pick up those bottles," Slughorn ordered. "Get them and yourself out of my sight." The boy scrambled to do just what he had been told to. He did a disappearing spell on the bottles, and headed for the door. As he was leaving he could hear the professor conclude with the words, "I don't know what you were thinking."

That was one thing Severus believed Slughorn had been right about, he didn't know what the boy was thinking. At that moment he was thinking he wished he had used that fire whiskey bottle to bash in Potter's head. He tried to banish the violent thought from his mind, but it was his ardent dream. He hated James Potter more than ever. Was that hate worth getting expelled? Was it worth ruining the rest of his life? Part of Snape felt that the rest of his life was already ruined; part of him felt that he had to get things back under control. James Potter was lucky that that day Severus Snape let his better half win out, for surly if that other half of him had won out, James Potter would have been dead that day.

Author's note: I am not sure if this is The End or TBC

I want to explain that Lily is coming off really harsh in this and a few other stories because they take place right after the mudblood incident. Part of her harshness is her trying to break away from their friendship.

Finally, although the story They Call Me MISTER Snivvs is not a direct sequel to this story it does take place in the same time frame, a few days later. It is rated lower. I want to let people know that I am writing a story that takes place that summer that is edgier. It doesn't have a title as of yet.

Thanks to everyone who has read, favorited, alerted, and especially reviewed this story.