Title: Forsaken

Author: Tara Kitaide

genre: romance/angst/tragedy

Pairing: Renji x Ichigo/Grimmjow x Renji

Disclaimer: Wouldn't it be so cool to own bleach? Unfortunately, I don't. If I did, there'd be hot yaoi smut every chapter.

Warning: Yaoi, language, fantasy violence

Rating: M for possible yaoi scenes

Dedication: To my fans! I love you all!


To say the soul society was in an uproar would be an understatement. Sense the death of the Sixth Division's Vice Capitan and disappearance of Substitute Shinigami Kurosaki Ichigo, all of the Thirteen court guard squads were frantically busy, not to mention emotionally distraught. Despite Yamamoto-sou-taichou's strong discouragement, search parties were sent throughout the human world, looking for any and all traces of Kurosaki Ichigo's reiatsu. While no trace of Ichigo's reiatsu was found, there was another; Ichimaru Gin's.

This new piece of information shone light on the case in favor of the theory Kurosaki Ichigo had been taken against his will. This was not all that was found though. In the sixth division where former vice capitan Abarai Renji's, zanpakutō was stolen, there was an ominous reiatsu. Not many were allowed in this area except for the 12th division but when Rukia Kuchiki expected the sight under her capitan's command, she recognized the reiatsu as none other then Abarai Renji's.

This brought even more questions about. At first Rukia was shot down for her Accusations but the stronger she insisted and the more people who recognized the fading spirit energy as Renji's backed her up, it now became a theory that Abarai Renji might still be alive.

It was on this account that Rukia Kuchiki was heading with her Capitan to a meeting of the divisions. It was to be decided once and for all the status of Abarai Renji's well being and his placement in the court guard squads.

When Rukia and Ukitake entered the meeting hall, there was nothing but dead silence. The capitans stood on one side as their vice capitans stood on another, facing one another. Rukia took her place next to Nemu and gave a half smile down the row to Rikichi who had been acting as Renji's replacement for the time being. Rikichi smiled back half heartedly and waved his hand in a simple hello before straightening back up and awaiting the Capitan General to begin the meeting.

"As it seems, all are now present." Yamamoto's voice boomed, startling a few of the Vice Capitans. "We may now begin." Yamamoto opened one ever closed eye and looked at Mayuri who returned the gaze with a nod.

"As you all know, we are here to discuss the odd occurrences lately regarding former fukutaichou of squad Six, Abarai Renji." Mayuri paused and heads bobbed up and down silently in understanding. "Up until a few days ago, it was believed that Abarai was killed in the line of duty. Evidence now shows this may not be so."

The lights in the room then dimmed as a small hole opened in the floor between capitan and vice capitan. From the hole, a light shone through revealing a projection of what appeared to be a DNA strand with slight modifications.

"This is a partical of Abarai's reiatsu in a crystallized, physical form. Notice how the outer layers are smooth as is with a Shinigami's. The inner layers are all Abarai's original traits, what makes his reiatsu unique. Now look at the particals found at the scene..."

The diagram moved over to the left and another one appeared beside it, looking almost identical to the diagram next to it.

"As you see, the outer layers are rather rough, unlike a shinigami's. They're jagged and give off a sharp presence but as you also may notice, the inner strands of the particals remain the same."

There was a momentary pause and as Mayuri was ready to continue, he was interrupted by Rukia as she took a slight step forward. "I'm sorry, Kurosutochi-taichou but I'm not quite sure what you're getting at. Regardless of how the outer layer looks, it's still Renji's reiatsu none the less isn't it? What does--"

"So very rude of you, girl. I was just getting to that part now keep quiet and listen."

Rukia shut her mouth and suppressed a sigh as she took a step back into her place.

"Now... as I was saying... Yes, this new reiatsu does indeed belong to Abarai but it's been altered. The outer layer indicates he is no longer shinigami yet he isn't a hollow. Meaning Abarai is now an Arrancar."

There were a series of gasps and mummers throughout the room. Rukia's eyes widened and she let out a small gasp but stayed relatively still as the weight of the words sunk in, leaving a heavy feeling in her chest. The whispers escalated to semi shouting matches but were ended quickly as Yamamoto thrust down his cane.

"Silence! All of you! That is quite enough!"

The room became quiet and all eyes fixed on Yamamoto as the projection sank back into the floor.

"Now, as Kuchiki-fukutaichou witnessed, Abarai Renji had indeed been killed by Ichimaru Gin." The Capitan Commander's eyes opened and flickered from person to person as he spoke. "But it seems Aizen Sōsuke once again had a part in this. Regarding the information provided, we have no choice but to assume Abarai Renji has turned his back on the soul society. From now on, he is an enemy to us! Is that understood?"

Many people in the room's eyes widened but nodded none the less or mutter a small "yes". Rukia however, after a few moments recovering from the second blow to her heart, stepped out like before but between the rows of officers.

"Y-Yamamoto-sou-taichou! P-Please reconsider!! Renji would never turn his back on us! I know he wouldn't! This has to be some sort of mistake or trick! I know it!"

"Kuchiki Rukia," Yamamoto looked down into the girl's frantic eyes as he spoke. "My decision on the mater stays. Now silence your self and return to your place--"

"No! I won't be silent! Please! You have to listen to me, Renji would never do this! Renji's--"

"Ukitake, Control your vice capitan at once."

"--always been faithful! He would never join that bastard! What if he was turned against his will?! What if they used the remains of his reiatsu and the Hogyoku to--"

"Rukia! That's quiet enough!"

Ukitake seized Rukia from behind and tried to calm her but she struggled in his grasp as she persisted. "This isn't Renji! Aizen's done something to him! He's still Renji! Please, sir! Let me and a group of shinigami go and we'll bring back both Ichigo and Renji!"

"And what if you are wrong? What if Kurosaki Ichigo has joined forces with Aizen Sōsuke after all?"

"They wouldn't do that! Certainly not Ichigo! I swear it to you! Ichigo would never--"

"That's enough, Rukia! Let it go!"

"But Taichou--"

"Let it go, I said!"

Rukia continued to struggle against her capitan's hold and continue on but it didn't last for she was dragged out of the meeting hall, all the while begging and pleading with the Capitan Commander.

Once out side and far from the meeting hall, Rukia stopped and collapsed against her capitan, heavy sobs escaping her accompanied by tears. She clutched her capitan's robe tight and buried her face in his chest, sob after sob continuing to come. Ukitake wrapped his arms around her small frail body lightly and held her close, rubbing soothing circles across her back in order to calm her.

Rukia looked up at him, her face face streaked with tears and hair slightly matted. "Capitan..." She called as best she could with her broken voice. "Please... Don't tell me it's true... Renji would never--"

"I know, Rukia. Believe me, I know. Ichigo and Renji were two of the best fighters we had. They wouldn't just turn their back on everyone for any reason." Ukitake wiped away her tears but more only came.

"I know..." Rukia sobbed. "It's just... First Renji's gone and now this... I just wish there was something I could do..."

"There is."

Rukia's eyes widened slightly and shot back to her capitan, never realizing her gaze had wandered. "C-Capitan...?"

"We will save them Rukia." Ukitake proclaimed, looking down at her with determined eyes and a steel resolve. "We'll drag their asses back here no mater what. We're going to Hueco Mundo."



Ichigo, as well as Mitsuji, sighed for the umpteenth time as the Arrancar tapped his foot against his position against the wall. For the past hour it had been like this, Ichigo always trying to come up with something to start a conversation but being brushed off by Mitsuji. It was frustrating and not only for Ichigo. Listening to the boy huff and sigh and mumble random things for an hour got on Mitsuji's nerves. He was on his last when--

"Damn it! Just say something already!!" Ichigo burst, throwing his head into his hands in frustration.

"W-What?! You're the one who's sighing and being fuckin' annoying as hell! I don't need to say anything! I have nothing to say to you!" Mitsuji grumbled and crossed his arms.

"It's not my fault! I'm just trying to help!" Ichigo stood and began to advance towards Mitsuji.

"'Help'? I don't need your help for anything! And if you bring up that Renji bastard one more time, I swear I'll—!"

Mitsuji stopped for Ichigo was now standing directly in front of him, their bodies merely inches from each other. He looked down at Ichigo who looked up at him and his eyes involuntarily widened.

Ichigo's eyes were lidded with a distant cloudy look to them. His hands hovered idly above Mitsuji's chest as if wondering whether it was safe to touch him or not. His lips were parted slightly, slight mews and broken words escaping his lips as he tried to find the words to say. Eventually, Ichigo gripped Mitsuji's uniform in his hands, removing the distance between them and pressing their bodies firmly together.

"What...?" Mitsuji tried to speak but he found his throat had suddenly become dry. His heart matched the pounding in his head as Ichigo slowly wrapped his arms tightly around Mitsuji's chest and rest his head against his heart. Mitsuji cleared his throat and tried to speak again but was cut off.

"I can't... say a word about someone when they're obviously standing in front of me." Ichigo said mater-of-factly. He looked up at Mitsuji, a blank, distant, look in his eyes. "Remember, Renji? All those times we trained in Urahara's basement? Or how you comforted me when I told you about my mother? And when you would spend the night at my house... My dad would pick on you a lot..." Ichigo gave a slight chuckle and sighed. "He really kicked your ass..."

Mitsuji felt himself shiver for some reason as Ichigo spoke of "their" memories together. Something began to pull painfully at the back of his mind, making him almost wince in pain and then there was that voice again...

Come on you idiot! Remember!

Mitsuji was going to growl and tell them both to shut up, the voice and Ichigo, when the boy shifted to look up at him again. Mitsuji looked down at him and was about to tell him to let him go when, once again, Ichigo's lips were on his in a light kiss.

But this time, without hesitation, Ichigo was rejected.

Mitsuji pushed the orange haired youth away, sending his already frail body tumbling to the ground. Ichigo gave out a small yelp as he landed on his back and sat up almost immediately to stare up at Mitsuji, wide eyed. Mitsuji wiped off his mouth as he had the first time Ichigo kissed him and scowled.

"I thought I told you to stop that, you brat!" He spat angrily. "What the hell's your damn problem? Why can't you just leave me the fuck alone?! I'm not your friend or your ally or your lover and I'm certainly NOT this Renji bastard! How many times do I have to say it so you'll understand?! I. HATE. YOU!"

Mitsuji raised his arm to punch Ichigo and the boy flinched, covering his face and head with his arms while readying himself for the blow. Mitsuji brought his fist down to connect with Ichigo when--

"I'm sorry!!"

Mitsuji stopped his arm in mid-flight, slightly shocked by Ichigo's trembling voice.

Ichigo tucked his head further into his arms and trembled, waiting. "I-I'm sorry..." He whispered again. "I'm sorry... for upsetting you... and getting on your nerves... I-It won't happen again..."

Mitsuji stopped and his fist relaxed and returned to his side. Once again those voices tugged at his mind but it was much easier to ignore them as regret and confusion became his only focus. He looked down at Ichigo who still sat tightly bunched together in fear and sighed.

His heart felt incredibly heavy and he hated it. Hated how no matter how hard he tried to hate Ichigo and push him away, there was always that feeling of regret and sorrow. But he was an arrancar, a hollow. He wasn't suppose to feel these things. He cursed, making Ichigo look up at him and cursed again.

"I can't believe you..."

Ichigo looked at Mitsuji, scared and confused. Wasn't he going to hit him? Beat him? He just stopped and now the man's eyes were covered by his long red hair. He kept his arms close encase he suddenly lashed out but he knew that wouldn't be the case. He could tell, by the look on Mitsuji's face, that he was struggling with himself; fighting against the dark part of his soul that wanted nothing more then to hurt Ichigo severely.

Ichigo was going to call out to him. He was going to stand and try to get through to him, to touch him or even hold him. He was going to but never got the chance for the door opened and a familiar face popped in.

"Oi, Mitsuji!" Grimmjow stopped when he realized something in the room wasn't normal. He looked at Ichigo who was looking at him and then to Mitsuji who hadn't moved a muscle. He called out again but still Mitsuji didn't move.

Grimmjow waited a moment until walking in. Ichigo opened his mouth to say something but stopped when Grimmjow looked at him and told him to be quiet.

Grimmjow stood at Mitsuji's side and put a hand on his shoulder, calling out again. This time Mitsuji snapped out of whatever trance he was in and looked up at Grimmjow, noticing for the first time the sixta espada had entered the room.

"Grimm?" Mitsuji said a little surprised. "What is it?"

Grimmjow used the hand on Mitsuji's shoulder to grab his arm and tugged him towards the door. "Come on, they need us for a meetin'."

Mitsuji didn't look at Ichigo or anywhere else in the room. He focused on Grimmjow and him alone. They were almost out of the door when--


Ichigo didn't know why he said it or where it had come from. It seemed like a last ditch effort on his part but none the less, he said it. He had to say it.

Mitsuji didn't turn around but his gaze drifted to the floor. He didn't say anything or acknowledge the name, he just stood there for what felt like an unbearable eternity. Grimmjow looked from Mitsuji to Ichigo a few times before resting on Mitsuji and asking him if he was alright. Mitsuji nodded and quickly left the room before Ichigo could say another word.

Grimmjow slammed and locked the door, not that Ichigo would try to get out anyway. Mitsuji stood by his side and it was only after he had slid the key in his pocket and looked at Mitsuji that he noticed tears sliding down the man's face and over the bone mask.


Mitsuji didn't say anything but the tears continued to pour down. He wiped at the ones on his cheek and held the wet hand up so he could look at it as if observing some priceless gem. It was odd to see the tears glistening on his hand like that. It was just like before, when he had slapped Ichigo that first time. He cried then after too and he didn't even know why. But now he could feel it. He could feel the pain and weight in his chest that wasn't there before.

He was thrown out of his thoughts once again as Grimmjow took his hand, the wet one, and made him look up at him. Grimmjow looked at his square in the eyes and asked; "Mitsuji... what the hell happened in there?"

Mitsuji looked at Grimmjow a while more, his eyes softening. "Grimm..." He whispered softly. "I don't know... I really don't know... one minute we were just sitting there and then he was sayin' some weird shit and..." He paused and looked down. "I just lost it..."

Grimmjow sighed as he felt Mitsuji begin to tremble. It was odd, seeing someone like Mitsuji crying for no reason. Grimmjow could do nothing but wrap his arms around the redhead and comfort him as best he knew how as hatred grew within him.

How dare that shinigami brat. How dare he upset my Mitsuji.

Grimmjow kissed Mitsuji's forehead and wiped away his tears. The redhead was not sobbing and never did but held tightly to Grimmjow's top and shivered.

"Are you going to be alright now?" He asked, lifting Mitsuji's face to look at him.

"Yeah, Grimm... I'm fine... Don't know what came over me." He gave a reassuring smile and patted Grimmjow's shoulder. "Now com on. You said we're needed somewhere, right?" Mitsuji was fixing to continue walking when Grimmjow grabbed his arm once again and pulled him into an embrace again, this time kissing him feverishly.

Mitsuji was a little surprised but kissed back regardless. He took no time in wrapping his arms around Grimmjow's neck as Grimmjow had a hand on the back of his neck in turn. Mitsuji relaxed and let Grimmjow support him. It had been so long sense him and Grimmjow kissed, he almost forgot how sweet it was. There were those tugs at the back of his mind and twinges in his heart but he shoved them away and focused on nothing but the sweet sensation as his tounge slid over Grimmjow's.

After a long while, Grimmjow pulled back. Mitsuji's fingers still tangled through the short blue hair and Grimmjow's hand stayed on the back of his neck while the other touched what little bit was exposed of his stomach. Grimmjow grinned and kissed Mitsuji's neck until he reached his ear, nibbling softly and sucking on the sensitive lobe.

"Come back to my place tonight, just you and me. It's been too long sense we've had some time together. Forget about the brat and come with me."

Mitsuji sighed and rest his forehead on Grimmjow's shoulder, nodding slightly and grunting as the espada kissed his neck again. "Okay..." He muttered.

Grimmjow smirked and kissed the nape of his neck again.

No one can have him but me. He thought bitterly to himself. No one but me.


Well... merry Christmas eve that is...

And if yer atheist then Happy Winter Solstice! lol

You might have noticed that I changed the pairing up at the top. This is because SMUT IS ON THE WAY, EVERYONE!! It's my teaser of a christmas gift to you!! And just to prove I'm not lying; here's some of it already typed up!


Mitsuji let his body flop lightly back on the bed as Grimmjow pushed him down, quickly reclaiming the man's lips and straddling his waist. Mitsuji reached out and ran his hands through Grimmjow's short hair, pushing him deeper in his wanting mouth.

Grimmjow smirked into the kiss, using his own hands to unzip the top of Mitsuji's Arrancar uniform. "You're being awfully needy today, Mitsuji." Grimmjow whispered in Mitsuji's ear, his breath ghosting across his tan skin.

Mitsuji shivered as Grimmjow licked his ear, biting down with just the right amount of pressure to send another shiver down Mitsuji's spine and elected a small moan. "You like that, eh?"

Mitsuji said nothing but nodded slightly, his breathing starting to come in quick, small gasps. Grimmjow's smirk widened. He slid his hands under Mitsuji's top, caressing the tanned, inked skin before latching onto Mitsuji's neck and slowly trailing down.

It was a familiar action, a familiar scenario, a familiar setting. Mitsuji wasn't a stranger to sex, especially with Grimmjow of all people. After all, Grimmjow was one of the few Arrancar that actually gave something other then an insult or fight challenge when Mitsuji walked in a room or passed them by in the hallway. Grimmjow kissed him, held him, fucked him, loved him. But even so...

Mitsuji gave another small gasp and moan as Grimmjow found his nipple, licking and sucking until it was hard. Mitsuji ran his hands through Grimmjow's hair once again and tugged on it in encouragement, now whining as his pants became unbearably tight.


Grimmjow lifted his head with one final lick and moved his lips back to Mitsuji's, kissing him lightly. "What is it?"

Mitsuji opened his eyes, never realizing they were ever closed, and looked up into Grimmjow's teal eyes. "Grimm..." He repeated. "I want you to fuck me..."

Grimmjow scoffed. "Nah, really? Never would have guessed--"

"No." Mitsuji sighed. "Please, Grimm. I want you to fuck me until I can't think... I wanna forget everything that's been going on..." I want to forget him.

Grimmjow's grin slowly disappeared from his face and grew strangely seriously and... sympathetic? Grimmjow nodded slowly, his eye contact with Mitsuji never breaking. "Alright." He said, kissing Mitsuji lightly once again. "But only because you asked so nicely."

Mitsuji smiled slightly and Grimmjow smiled in turn. It didn't last long though for they were soon at it again, kissing harder then ever as their hands made quick work of Each other's cloths.

Grimmjow sat up on his knees and finished removing his top, something Mitsuji was having trouble with. He then dove back down, tugging off the Black obi around Mitsuji's waist with his teeth and grazing over the crimson haired man's erection multiple times, electing a series of gasps and groans from his lover.

"Nngh... Grimm..."

Grimmjow grinned and slid Mitsuji's bottoms down to his ankles, leaving his lover's hard on painfully in the open for Hueco Mundo wasn't big on human undergarments.

Mitsuji gasped as Grimmjow's breath ghosted over the insides of his thighs and across his member, coming dangerously close yet straying out of reach each time.

"G-Grimm!" Mitsuji wined, his hands flying to Grimmjow's head once again. "Oh god, please! Just do it already!"

Grimmjow chuckled lightly and let his tounge flicker over the tip of Mitsuji's member, earning a moan and a gasp in the process. "Nu-uh." He teased. "I wanna hear you say it. Tell me what you want."

Mitsuji gasped again as Grimmjow delivered another teasing lick, digging his blunt fingernails into the Espada's scalp. "Oh, HELL! Grimmjow, please! Just do it already! I can't take it!"

"Just tell me what you want." Grimmjow repeated, reaching up to massage his lover's scrotum. "You know how to make me stop."

Mitsuji gasped and huffed, his senses overwhelmed at the dual sensations he was receiving. Grimmjow licked his member once again from base to tip and that was just about all he could take. "Grimmjow, please blow me!"

Said man smirked and gripped the base of his lover's erection, still fondling him as he went. "Thought you'd never ask." Then, after giving the tip one final lick, he dived down and took Mitsuji's cock in his mouth, swallowing him whole as he began to suck.

THAT'S ALL YOU GET NOW, GREEDY!! XD MERRY CHRISTMAS! (or winter solstice! lolz!)