Okay, so I'm currently at a beach condo, which has adult swim. So, late at night, what is Bloodmoon-sensei watching? FMA, of course. So she's watching, and ideas pop into her head. She wakes up the next morning, and vegetates, then decides to write. Claps hands, the Authoress is back! Dressed as MSA, too!

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from FullMetal Alchemist. I do, however, own the strange character known as the Authoress. Please do not steal her. Lol

Warning: Um…randomness? Yes, much in the way of random. Not much else, actually. Pretty clean. Actually, squeaky.

Summary: Ed comes home, somewhat tired, and finds someone in the house. Who is in the house, and what does she want?

Talking about Love

"Whew," said Ed, walking down the street. He was staying by himself for a week while Winry and Al were at Granny Rockbell's house. He just needed some time by himself.

That why, when he unlocked the door to his apartment, he was surprised to find the lights on. He hadn't left them on when he left, had he? He didn't think he had, but then, he had been pretty preoccupied that morning.

He went from the entrance area into the kitchenette, and found the teakettle bubbling away merrily. Tea? Okay, maybe the lights he could explain away, but the teakettle? He didn't even drink tea! He switched the stove off, and dumped the boiling water down the sink. It made gurgling noises as the drain sucked it down. The gurgling noises continued after the water was gone, and Ed realized that someone was actually in the apartment, with him, and she was laughing. At least, it sounded like a female. No guy he could think of would be caught dead giggling.

He advanced from the kitchenette to his bedroom, which was the last place in the small apartment. He opened the door, ready for an attack, and promptly stopped in his steps.

Sitting on his bed was a girl. A girl not Winry. She turned at his sharp inhalation, and smiled happily at him. She had bright red hair pulled back into a ponytail, vivid green eyes, and had…an automail catalog in her hands. She was wearing a white button-up blouse that strangely resembled the military shirt, and a blue miniskirt with black heels.

"Hey, love," she told him, twisting on the bed so that she was lying on her stomach, heels in the air. She propped her chin up on her hands, and winked at him.

"Who are you, and why are you in my apartment- in my room?" he demanded, in a very Ed-like way. His visitor smiled, and began to speak.

"I thought we might get to this little snag. Characters are always so curious, aren't they?" She asked the last part to seemingly no one.

"Anyways, getting back to why I'm here, I had to talk to you, didn't I? So I just let myself in here. Nice place, you have, too. I was surprised."

Even as angry as Ed was, he had to acknowledge the compliment.

"Thanks. It was a bargain-deal. What the hell are you wanting to talk about so much?"\


Okay, this was not only random, it was scary as well. Why on Earth would anyone, much less someone he had never met, want to talk to him about Winry? He said as much, to the general amusement of the girl.

"Love, you are completely clueless, aren't you?" She rose up to a sitting position, crossing her legs under her.

"No I'm not. And stop calling me 'love'. I'm not your sweetheart!" Her soft Southern drawl nearly drove him crazy! He didn't like her voice. Too, well, relaxed and groovy would be the terms he chose.

"Would 'darlin'' be better? Or I could always go 'chibi'!" she gently teased. She pulled the scrunchie out of her hair, and separated a lock of hair from the rest. She played with it, starting by braiding it.

"I. AM. NOT. CHIBI!" he screamed at her, randomly going blue in the face. Why blue instead of red? I don't know. But I like blue a lot more than red. Much calmer colour, I find. Why am I talking to you? Here, get back to the story.

"Oh, chill. Be relaxed and groovy, you'll have fewer problems with your blood pressure." In all this time, the stranger hadn't changed the volume of her voice.

"Why? Why must everyone call me chibi?" Ed was wailing now, on his knees.

"Because your reactions are so much fun. Now grow up." Her soft drawl turned hard, and she narrowed her eyes at him. The effect was immediate- Ed calmed down, and stared at her. With her eyes narrowed, he noticed that she wore light silver eye shadow and a thin line of black eyeliner that winged out slightly, making her eyes lashes seem curlier. The effect was…charming. Charming, in a very cobra-like way. In a way almost worthy of Lust.

"Okay, now that you're calmed down, you had a question?" She raised an eyebrow, which strangely made the corner of her mouth quirk up.

"I did? Oh yeah! What do you wanna talk about Winry for? She's just my mechanic."

Ed tentatively took a seat on the edge of his bed, wary of the woman, but feeling slightly more at easy- for some strange reason. Don't know why.

"Just a mechanic? Just a mechanic? Ed, you have so much to figure out. Let me clue you in. Winry likes you. Think about it. How many times has she been there for you?"

She tilted her head to the side, which made her hair cascade over her shoulder. She regarded it a moment, and tossed it back behind the shoulder.

"Well, I-"

She cut him off, "And she always takes such good care of you when your automail is broken. It hurts when it's all connected up, but not like it would if you were anyone other than Ed."

"I guess-" he tried again, only to have her cut him off again.

"And she's always such a good sport about fixing you up. When you shatter her best work ever, yeah she might be mad, but she also fixes you up."

Ed answered quickly, before his visitor could interrupt.

"Yeah, but that's just her being a good mechanic, isn't it? It's not anything special, right?"

She shook her head, making her hair- suddenly curly for this effect- bounce.

"She wouldn't do half that stuff if she wasn't in love. Besides, she's more than just a mechanic. She checks up on you in Central, and sends you apple pie that Mrs. Hughes taught her to make, and calls to remind you not to strain your arm or leg."

He countered, "But that's just what Granny Rockbell asks her to do. Granny Rockbell worries about us, especially Al."

"Then why is it Winry you're here to get away from rather than Granny Rockbell?"

This, Ed had no answer for. Except now, he had to wonder if he was being stalked! Was he in the same room as a stalker? He asked, which brought a merry giggle from his visitor.

"A stalker? Me? Oh, all right, I guess I do follow you a bit. Hey, at least I'm not a rabid fangirl! I save that for the Colonel."

A dreamy look entered her eyes, and she gazed into nothing for a moment. A mushy love song started playing in the background. It took a moment, but when she realized what was playing- 'L is for the way you LOOK at me', she banished the caterwauling, much to the disappointment of the real Authoress. The real Authoress, who is of course me, had been slow dancing with her bishi.

"Rabid fangirl? Great, now I have to deal with a rabid fangirl!"

"Nope. I said that I was a stalker, but not a rabid fangirl. Those are all back in my world."

The stranger girl giggled, and started playing with her hair again.

There was silence for a moment, then Ed spoke.

"You really think she likes me?" He looked at her sidelong, still skeptical.

"Oh yeah. Just think about all the 'mechanic-y things she does for you that you never notice."

She produced an apple from midair, and took a bite. Ed barely registered that the apple made no noise in her mouth because he was talking.

"Well, she half-kills me whenever I break my arm, but she always fixes it, I guess. She rushed to Central the moment she heard I was in the hospital again, both to half-kill me and to fix my leg…more of the half-killing me and fixing the automail…Wow. I guess you're right. She does like me!"

She smiled endearingly, and tossed him an apple.

"You're on the right track. So, will you stop running away from her now?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. A piffle is heard in the general background, and though it cannot truly be traced, authorities have later credited it to the real Authoress, because she cannot raise one eyebrow at a time, but must raise them both.

Authoress's corner- It's the real one, yeah. I had random inspiration again, so…this is what popped out of my fingertips. I don't know why it couldn't wait, but I guess it couldn't. Love you, please review! I would love you forever!