What You Can't Say Sober

By F. W. Bourdillon

There were these small things you couldn't say with a sober mind.

Warning: Contains Shonen-ai / Yaoi and contains sexual situations

Word Count: 1,826

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto and all rights belong to Kishimoto

Chapter Three


Hidan's gaze was fixated on the back of Kakuzu's head.

It had already been three weeks since the incident on the road and gradually everything had been returning to normal or more like everything was practically reverted back to how they first met, yelling and cussing.

Kakuzu was back to getting mad at Hidan's constant bickering and how much time his rituals consumed; the two were back to throwing insults at each other o arguing about something irrelevant, of which, like before, Kakuzu always won.

Hidan was back to yelling and complaining and having Kakuzu deny any of his requests, such as stopping for food, rest, or anything else that wasted money or time.

So everything was back to normal and there were no problems…

Except that Hidan still wanted to know what was up with that events that had conspired on the road, he wanted to know why Kakuzu had given him such a longing look (especially since Hidan had only seen a small variety of emotions from the stitch man) and he wanted to know what that gentle touch on his cheek had meant.

Reaching up and gently touching the exact spot that his partner had caressed, Hidan couldn't keep down the blush that formed on his cheeks at the memory of Kakuzu's thumb stroke his cheek with such care and gentleness. He also couldn't help but remember how Kakuzu left him craving that same soft touch to never end.

Hidan couldn't deal with this want that bubbled in the pits of his stomach when Kakuzu was close. He wanted answers. He needed them. And he was determined to get some answers…

As for Kakuzu, he simply wanted to forget the whole thing in itself; he didn't want to care for Hidan, he didn't want to feel the need to be near him, he didn't want to feel somewhat happy waking up to Hidan's beautiful face. He didn't want to feel anything at for him.

But he did.

And he did care for Hidan, and he did want to be near Hidan, and he did want to wake up to see Hidan sleeping peacefully, so close but out of his reach. And regardless of what he told himself, he did feel something for Hidan and he liked this feeling (though he would never admit to it) because it made him feel more alive and human then he had ever felt before.

The two walked in silence and Kakuzu was now vaguely aware that Hidan was staring at him from behind. So stopping in his steps he turned his head sending a slight, if not slightly pathetic, glare over his shoulder, "What is it Hidan?"

Hidan flinched as soon as Kakuzu spoke automatically snapping out of his thoughts, "What?" he asked harsher than intended sending a glare (which also seemed as weak as Kakuzu's) to meet the eyes of the one who had plagued his thoughts for the past few weeks.

"You were staring at me." Kakuzu replied now turning around fully to face Hidan and crossing his arms over his chest in slight annoyance.

Hidan only scowled in response to Kakuzu's actions and words, "No I wasn't! Besides how could you tell anyways!? You had your back turned to me!" he said while mimicking Kakuzu and crossing his arms over his chest as well.

Kakuzu sighed in aggravation, "Any good fighter could tell when someone is staring at them Hidan." He shook his head, "But then again, you wouldn't really know that now would you?"

Hidan raised his fist taking a few steps forward , he grabbed the front of Kakuzu's collar and glared intensely opening his mouth to make a snide remark only to stop when realizing how close he was to the other.

There was a long silence and neither dared to move; not only because of the pleasant sensation of breathes intermingling and faces only centimeters apart but as well as the uneasy feeling coming off from either and setting in like a thick fog.

Hidan slowly looked up Kakuzu directly into his eyes to see those strange white pupils of his staring down at him while an unreadable expression and ever-so-slowly Hidan's eyes trailed down to the stitch mans' clothed mouthed and…he had a very sudden craving to know what it would feel like to kiss Kakuzu.

With a slightly trembling lower lip and only being vaguely aware what was going on, Hidan found himself tip-toeing and leaning into Kakuzu with half massed eyes only to close when his lips met with the cloth covered ones of Kakuzu.

Kakuzu stood still for a brief moment as if comprehending what was going on, before he pulled Hidan closer to deepen the kiss, and before either knew what was going Kakuzu's mask had been pulled down and the two had started in a vicious fight for dominance with their mouths, the smaller mans hands on either side of Kakuzu's face.

It lasted for a few seconds, though, to them it seemed eternal…The kiss broke with both of them panting for air in ragged breathes.

They both stared at each other for a moment, Hidan wondering what had just happened while Kakuzu was wondering if he had really just done what he thought he had done as well as why. Afterall he had decided to up give on Hidan knowing that he could only ever be near the other male and nothing else…but this was something else, so he found himself questioning the logic going through his mind at the moment.

Hidan blinked a few times, a small red tint coming up to stain his cheeks when awareness hit him, but, being who he was, he wouldn't act like some pansy-ass little girl who just received their first kiss (which it had been).

Giving a quick shove to Kakuzu to distance himself from the other (though he was the one who was pushed back and Kakuzu simply remained immobile) he coughed, hoping it would fill it some of the awkward silence; which really, only helped slightly.

"Well…" the silver haired man looked away noticing he had nothing to say before turning to Kakuzu and giving a feeble glare, as if trying to act intimidating, "Lets go already!" he shouted.

Kakuzu snapped out of his thoughts, his head jerking up slightly in surprise, "…You were the one stalling us." He said giving a not so convincing glare.

Neither spoke for the rest of the day, just walking on with nothing but the voices of their own thoughts rushing their minds.


They reached a hotel by nightfall, it had gone decided that even without words they both needed a comfortable resting place to straighten (even if 'straight' wasn't exactly the words going through either of their heads at the moment) out their thoughts.

They sat there, Hidan on the bed reading his bible to himself mentally, while Kakuzu sat at the near by desk writing on a ledger with a pen and punching in numbers with abnormal speed into his small calculator.

Of course, even in the quiet nature of the room and how engrossed into their own business as they were, there was still that small something tugging at both of the individuals heads; Hidan wouldn't want to admit it or even ask about it as he wasn't used to this feeling and it left him feeling somewhat weak and exposed while Kakuzu would rather just drop the whole situation in itself and hope to forget about it in the near future.

In the stillness that held in the air of the room, Hidan couldn't help but think about the incident on the road that had happened weeks ago for the second time that day; he still hadn't gotten any answers (though he had an idea, though he was almost terrified to bring up the subject) and now he had more questions than ever.

Hidan was fighting with himself at the moment, questioning if he should bring it up, he thought about his options; he could ignore it and pretend nothing happened, he could never speak to Kakuzu ever again-which seemed impossible considering the silver-haired man's nature, or he could bring up the subject and get the answers he wanted.

Right now he was debating through options 1 and 3.

Taking a deep breathe Hidan swallowed preparing himself for the unease he knew was sure to follow as soon as his question left his mouth, "Kakuzu." He said in an almost too stern voice; great now he sounded like the taller man.

Kakuzu didn't turn to face his partner but tensed a little, even if it wasn't noticable, "What?"

"So…like what was up with today?"

Kakuzu almost chocked; that had not been what he thought the silver-haired man was going to say, but he strained himself, instead his hand stopped with its writing and he slowly turned his head to Hidan looking at him over his shoulder; Hidan was sitting there his expression holding indifference.

'What was up with today…?'

Kakuzu didn't even know the answer, so he turned around and muttered quietly, "I don't know." His eyes falling on the pen in hand as his body refused to let him even move.

Hidan scowled, obviously not satisfied with the answer, "Like hell!" he shouted unnecessarily loud, Kakuz made no movements and Hidan continued, "You HAVE to know!" he protested, 'because I don't…' he thought to himself subconsciously.

Kakuzu stayed silent; there wasn't much he could say at this point.

Hidan frowned, contemplating his next words and actions with more precision then he had with anything else in his lifetime. 'Well, all, in all…' he decided, 'I got nothing to loose.' So with that thought he stood on his feet, Kakuzu become rigid realizing Hidan was coming closer to him (since when was he so tense around people? Especially Hidan.), walking to the others side he grabbed Kakuzu's face with both his hands like he had before earlier that day, and pushed his lips to Kakuzu's clothed mouth roughly, eyes shutting tightly.

Kakuzu made no qualms to move or stop Hidan, and when the silver-haired man pulled away and looked down at him slightly annoyed, Kakuzu only blinked a few times and stared. They both stood there in silence for a few moments until Kakuzu's limbs decided to start working again.

Reaching up a hand, Kakuzu gently hooked his hand behind Hidan's neck and pulled him down-Hidan obliged without complaint-rolling off the mask Kakuzu pressed his mouth to Hidan's once more, this time gentler.

Hidan's eyes slid shut as he relaxed into the kiss, one hand pressing against Kakuzu's shoulder to keep himself balanced, who knew Kakuzu could actually do gentle?

For now, this was as far as they would get tonight; both were tired and would rather sleep.

And as Hidan lay there in Kakuzu's arms, he couldn't help but notice that all the questions that had been in his mind, seemed non-existent now.



A/n: I gotta say…not good with endings o:: O But whatever, it's my story so I can make the ending however I want it! So ha!...Right, well, I haven't updated in a million years or so, but I had a really bad creative spill, lot of crap happens and you loose interest, not that I'm emo and/or was at any point but yeah…

Well, my creativities' reached a high point, I think that's because of a friend, so I thank him! Whee! I'm awesome, that's all I gotta say! (And if peoples don't like this ending I might add another chapter to make things better).

PS. I gotta stop making the chapters so short…