"And we have a new idea for a town fundraiser!" Taylor announced excitedly.
Lorelai's attention was once again regained. "What did I miss?" she asked Rory as she stuffed a chili fry in her mouth.
"Nothing. Taylor was harassing Babette about the number of lawn gnomes she's allowed to have out front. But now we bring you back to your regularly scheduled program," Rory replied.
Taylor banged the gavel on the podium to regain the composure of those in attendance. "All right, calm down. The next contest is a Twister Tournament! We will set up as many Twister mats as we can fit in the gym, two to a mat, plus your assigned official spinner. We will do a single elimination tournament. We play by the official Twister rules, the last one standing wins. All proceeds benefit the repair of the bridge... and the winner gets… this." Taylor reached over to uncover a golden Twister spinner on a trophy.
"It's beautiful," Lorelai gasped.
"It's mine," Kirk grunted from behind Lorelai.
Lorelai turned around. "In your dreams, Gleason," she said, attempting to be intimidating.
Kirk rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that's scary," he said sarcastically.
"Don't worry, Mom. That trophy will look good on the kitchen table," Rory insisted.
"The kitchen table?" Lorelai questioned. "We eat there."
Rory shook her head. "We eat at Luke's. The kitchen table is virtually obsolete."
Lorelai nodded in agreement. "Oh, I forgot, you are a smart high school almost freshman now," she said, wrapping her arm around her daughter.
"The tournament is Saturday, so anyone who is interested can sign up at Doose's after the meeting," Taylor elaborated.
Lorelai turned to Rory. "This is it."
Rory gave Lorelai a confused look. "What's what?"
"This is the one chance I have. I am going to beat Kirk. I am going to win this whole thing. I am going to be a living legend around here. They'll pass by and say 'Look, there's Lorelai Gilmore, Twister Champion!' and I will wave, smile, and sign autographs for adoring fans."
Rory folded her arms. "Just be sure to keep it real, okay? Remember the little people?"
"I will. And maybe they'll have me be an ambassador to… what board game company invented Twister?" Lorelai mused.
"That would be better described as consulting, and I have no idea. Why is Twister even called a board game? The only board is the spinner thingamajig," Rory pointed out.
Lorelai reached into her purse. "Add it to the list of life's imponderables," she said. "Ooh! Sharpie!" she said.
"What do you need that for?" Rory asked.
Lorelai grinned. "To write my name, in huge letters, at the top of that sign up sheet. Everyone's going to know how serious I am about this Twister thing."
"I don't think a Sharpie will make or break your dedication," Rory added.
Lorelai shrugged. "Ah, but it's a pink sharpie, and it makes a statement! It says, 'VICTORY' only with style and pizzazz!"
"Oh, well, that's a horse of a different color!" Rory teased.
The town meeting dragged for what seemed like hours. Lorelai jiggled her foot, uncrossed and recrossed her legs, and fidgeted incessantly until Taylor finally made a move for his gavel.
"This meeting is officially adjourned!" Taylor announced.
Lorelai darted up from her chair and across the square to be the first in line at Doose's. She checked her watch again and again until Taylor made his way to Doose's with the fresh sign-up sheet.
"Lorelai, your enthusiasm for this event is unparalleled!" Taylor said.
She shrugged as she reached for the sheet. "Ah, what can I say? I've got spirit!"
Taylor jerked the hand with the sheet away from Lorelai. "If only everyone in the town could be as enamored by this as you are… we'd be raising lots of money for the bridge!"
"Yes, yes, the bridge, right. Are you going to post that?" Lorelai asked, pointing to the sheet.
Taylor nodded. "Ah, I almost forgot Scotch tape. Be right back!" he said, slipping into the market.
Lorelai silently cursed Taylor as a line began to form behind her. She turned around to see Kirk getting as close to her as possible. "Kirk?" Lorelai asked. "Personal space, please. I am a boy in a bubble."
Kirk looked confused. "You look like a girl to me, but then again, you can never be too sure…"
"Kirk!" Lorelai said, exasperated and losing her patience. "I was making a reference."
"Oh," Kirk said, embarrassed.
When Taylor emerged from Doose's with the sign up sheet and the tape, Lorelai wasted no time, writing her name in all capital letters at the very top of the sheet. She stood, admired the sheet for a moment, and trudged her way out of line.
"You were in such a rush before, what made you go so slow all of a sudden?" Rory questioned.
Lorelai smiled. "I just wanted to see how the bracket was going to look with my name in the middle of it. Come on, let's go find Twister in the garage! I have to train!" Lorelai ran off to the Crap Shack, leaving Rory to stand and comprehend what was going on before she realized Lorelai was once again high speed.
This was going to be one crazy town event.