Ok, so here I am , sitting in my room, pissy cause my sister kicked me off the computer….bitch. So, alas, I am on the laptop. I'm bored, so here's another chapter!!
Disclaimer!! I own NOTHING!! NOTHING!!! Sigh, not even the Man Posse ©… Harry happily owns them…and the swords…
Paint Balling with the Cullens!!!!
"Emmett…" Bella started, "You are going to have to eat whatever I cook for you," Bella stated. Oh, that's not that bad!! Its just… Oh, crap. I HAVE TO EAT!!! THAT'S DISGUISTING!!!!! EWWWWWWWW!!!!!!
This is NOT looking good… Where was the sane and rational part of my mind when this plan was created??!!! It should have been there, screaming MISSION ABORT!!! MISSION ABORT!!! But no, it had to be on holiday, or something, or missing…
"Yeah, Emmett, I don't think that art of your mind went on holiday… I think it full out retired…" Edward snickered, causing the rest of our family to snicker.
Hey! That wasn't nice!! "Hey! That wasn't nice!!" I said back to him.
"Emmett, you know that I can hear you if you think something and you don't need to say it again out loud," Edward said with an exasperated sigh.
"So, um, Edward," Carlisle said, looking completely confounded, "Are you planning on Emmett doing something? Cause, you know, there's only a certain number of times we can catch him red handed at a prank or something, so, you know, get your revenge now for all those times he got you before!!"
Hey!! That is sooooo not fair!! "Hey!! That is so not fair!!" I yelled, giving Carlisle a dirty look. He looked down,, ashamed that he admitted the plan out loud.
"Um, Carlisle, you could have just told me in your mind… But, hell yeah! I am totally getting you now, Emmett!!" Edward yelled, giving Jasper a high five. Bella cleared her throat, "Oh, and of course, for you, love," Edward quickly added, giving Bella a quick kiss on her neck. "Anyways, before I tell you your punishment, I need to ask you something, Alice," Edward turned to her, "Can I borrow your Man Posse?"
Alice grinned evilly. This was NOT good… "Why of course, Edward!!"
"Excellent… Ok, so Emmett… This is what you're going to have to do…"
I have to admit, Edward was good. After hearing his punishment, all of us, excluding Emmett, were feeling deeply appreciative. I didn't think he had it in him, and I was impressed. This was awesome, humiliating, and awesome!! I couldn't wait to go back to school at lunch!! This was brilliant.
"Carlisle!!" Emmett whined, "This isn't fair!!"
"Edward, I am impressed…" Carlisle stated in awe, then addressed Emmett, "Son, you made your bed, now you have to lay in it. It is not my fault that you angered Edward so much by destroying his stereo—"
"Twice!!" Edward chirped in.
"—painting his car pink, annoying him to no end, and making his girlfriend look like a whore, no offence Bella…"
"So, then, Emmett, lets get this show on the road!" Esme stated excitedly.
Alice snapped her fingers and her Man Posse © came jogging up, wearing matching dark wash Abercrombie jeans and very tight, see-through white shirts, and struck poses, while a little fat man ran ahead of them with a giant battery powered fan, causing the Man Posse's © hair to blow dramatically in the breeze created.
"Ok, so Hans, Erik (an, I'M ERIK!!! AHAHA!! Yes, I am in the Man Posse ©, Harry is as well, she's Hans!!) Stephie, Todde, Viktor, Augustus, Günther, Jean Claude, you are going to be helping me with a favour for my brother Edward…" Alice explained the Man Posse© in rapid German. This announcement caused the Man Posse© to excitedly jump up and down squealing, while excitedly chattering amongst themselves in a guttural sounding German.
"Quiet, now…" The models continued to excitedly giggle, "QUIET!!" They shut up. "Ok, so here's what's going to happen…" And Alice then began to explain the plan to her Posse. After hearing their task, their eyes shone bright at the prospect of making Alice (and Edward) happy.
Edward, Alice and I drove back to school in silence. Not and awkward, uncomfortable silence, but a satisfied, amused, evil silence. When we arrived at the school, it was just before lunch, and we walked over to the main office building.
"Mrs. Cope?" Edward asked, stepping into the office, "Um, we had some car problems this morning, and need to sign in late…" Edward trailed off.
"Oh, why of course!" Mrs Cope trilled, batting her eyelashes. "Anything, for you, Edward…" Mrs Cope said breathlessly as Alice and I tried not to laugh at the 40-some-odd woman hitting on my fiancée. Edward's jaw clenched at her thoughts, and I could faintly feel a slight rumbling in his chest. After we had signed in, Mrs Cope then added, "Oh, and you three can go right to your lunch period, as there is only 5 minutes left of classes…"
Edward ran to the door and out into the parking lot. Alice and I trailed out behind him, screaming with laughter. We finally quieted down, and walked into the cafeteria. I saw the sheet that Emmett had passed around, and ground my teeth, my good mood suddenly gone. We walked over to a usually abandoned table for lunch, and watched as the students began piling in. About 5 minutes later, Edward began smiling, and I knew Emmett was going to be there soon.
Suddenly, the cafeteria doors burst open, Emmett dramatically posed, with the Man Posse © posing behind him, in the door way, and continued walking into the middle of the cafeteria. They were all walking in the typical runway style, like they were on the prowl. I almost died when I saw their outfits.
The Man Posse© were wearing little sailor outfits, without hats, that included white tight, short jumpsuits, that were unzipped in the front to re-veil inches of tan, chiselled abs, and slip on deck shoes. Emmett, oh my Carlisle, Emmett!!! Was wearing a captain's uniform, which was quite tight.
Alice and I almost died (no pun) with laughter watching them, while Edward just sat there fighting the urge to roar with laughter, as he was holding a camera trained on Emmett's every move.
Emmett suddenly jumped up on Mike's table, and commanded everyone's attention. The Man Posse© were posing dramatically in front of the table, at the fat man ran in front of them with a fan causing all their hair to look devastatingly wind-swept.
Emmett cleared his throat, as if he didn't all ready have everyone's attention already, and began speaking, "Attention students of Forks High!!" Emmett yelled, "I have a very important announcement to make, on this FAB-U-LOIS lunching period!! You see, some of you may have noticed some pictures circulating this morning, of my new and totally awesome soon-to-be sister-in-law!!" Everyone looked confused, as realization dawned onto their faces that I was engaged to Edward. Well, that would pull notice from the pictures…
"Well…" Emmett continued, despite the whispers that started up, "I couldn't just let her have all the attention, now could I?" Emmett asked with a pout, sticking his hip out a smiggen, "So, I am now announcing, to ALL OF YOU LUCKY STUDENTS, who are the first to know!! I am ALSO getting engaged!!!"
"You're getting married to Rosalie?" Edward shouted out, to provoke Emmett.
"No, no, you silly gooses! (AN, AHAHA!!! Emmett is channelling Big Gay Al, ya know, from South Park!!!) That is what I am announcing!! I am leaving Rosalie, for… STEPHIE!!!!" Emmett squealed, as he jumped into Stephie's awaiting arms. He slung his arm around his neck, and shouted out, "All right now!! Stephie and I are off to Canada now, where we can get married OFFICIALLY!!! Ta ta!!" And with that the Man Posse© and Emmett left the school to a shocked silence, only broken by mine and Alice's screaming laughter. Even Edward couldn't keep it in, and he started laughing. Nervous and confused whispers broke out as we continued laughing hysterically.
We decided to skip for the rest of the day. Which was good, because we would just start randomly laughing at constant intervals. Once we showed the tape to the rest of the Cullens, Rosalie stopped sulking about the whole rumor that was sure to be spread around Forks that Emmett was leaving her because he was gay.
And with that, Emmett started the year he called, originally, "The Year from Hell". The pictures were forgotten by all but Lauren, who was annoyingly persistent to bring up the subject about "Bella being a whore and not deserving Edward". People get tired of constantly hearing about it, so Tyler hit her with his van. Bella was changed after her and Edward tried to elope in Las Vegas, but Alice found them and guilt-tripped Bella into her doing the wedding. Bella was changed shortly after.
I didn't know how to end it… Ahaha. It sucks!!! YAY!!! THIS ANNOYINGLY STUPID TO ME STOY IS OVER!!! Yesssssss….. you have no clue how happy and relieved I am right now… Its awesome… Ok, so Harry and I have decided that we are probably going to do a story about the adventures with the Man Posse©, but yeah. I also need other ideas for more stories and such, so give them to me if you want. Yes. Its over!!!