Chapter 2: I'm sorry
"Oh, you mean the mystery girl? Well what changed? Who inspired this extremely romantic song, something we've never really heard from you before, you always seemed to go for the angry angst music." Sango asked, glaring even harder at Inuyasha. Oh yea, things were falling into place.
Inuyasha took a deep breath, and Kagome stopped breathing...
Inuyasha caught her eye, knowing that he had to say this to her. As he stared at her he couldn't help but feel his expression soften to the look only she could put on his face. He never let anyone know that he couldn't be that affected by them, because then they would know he was weak. But not Kagome, she didn't think him weak. A cruel and obnoxious jerk maybe, but never weak. God he was stupid…
"I wrote it for her. She dissevered to know how I felt don't you think? This was the only thing I could think of to let her know. She probably hates my guts by now. I know why too, I never went after her. That was my mistake. I should have gone after y—her. I should have given into my instincts and ran after her, but I didn't. So now I'm doing the best I can. I'm letting everyone know." Inuyasha gave a wry smile. "I'm going to interview at every radio station I can until I know that there is no way she could have missed what I want her to hear."
Kagome couldn't help but give a small smile at that comment. He couldn't let anyone know that she sat her, but at the same time he knew that he wouldn't have to do anymore interviews. He probably would anyway; he was a very stubborn man.
Sango held in a laugh but couldn't stop herself from smiling. "Well I think most girls would melt over that song. Kagome, our new DJ is here helping out, and I was wondering, what do you think Kagome?"
Both Inuyasha and Kagome froze as the stared at Sango. 'Is she fucking nuts?' Inuyasha thought, quickly shaking his head in a very obvious gesture NO! This could not turn out good for him…
Kagome was frozen, but only for a moment. The panicked look on Inuyasha's face almost sent her into hysterical laughter, god she was in a tight spot. Before she could answer she needed to think! To consider all the possibilities. Didn't she? And than it came to her, she knew why Sango was pushing it. Because Kagome over thought everything. Closing her eyes and taking a deep breath Kagome answered, "I think he could probably win her back with that song, but you might have to do something more Inuyasha. If it was me I would want you to grovel, probably involving lots of flowers and chocolate too. Maybe some really good explanations." That was not what she had meant to say.
That was not what he had been expecting either. Doing a double take Inuyasha let his mouth hang open for a moment before his usual cocky grin dominated his face. "Why thank you Kagome, I'll take that into consideration." Oh yeah, definitely cocky.
Kagome narrowed her eyes and was about to tell him what he could do with his "considerations" when Sango cut in. "Well folks it's time for a quick music and commercial break, we'll be back with more Inuyasha and he's come back CD when we, well, come back!"
The little green light signaling they were on the air turned red, a very similar shade to the color of Kagome's face. "Inuyasha what the hell are you doing here?" Kagome asked, her voice abnormally low and slightly ominous.
Inuyasha opened his mouth several times, only to close it again. Than without warning he was kneeling in front of her with his arms around her waist and his head buried in her neck. "I'm so fucking sorry. I'm an idiot, no, a moron! I suffered a whole fucking year without you, and why? Because I had god damn commitment issues? I'm such and ass." He murmured against her neck, letting himself take in the sent of her. If she never came back to him, if this was the last time he held her he needed to imprint his sent in his mind, and the way she felt. He needed to never forget again. For the past year he had wished he'd paid more attention to the little things. If this was it he was not going to let the opportunity pass.
Kagome was a whirlwind of emotion. Part of her screamed to push him away, to get the person who had caused her so much pain as far away as possible. She couldn't help but think about all they had had together, and what he had done…
She'd always loved the rain. Something about the way it sounded as it pounded on the roof, and the sense of renewal left behind it had always made her think fanciful thoughts when it rained. She had been standing at her apartment window staring out over the parking lot when she saw him standing next to his car, just staring up at her window. She gave a small wave and when he didn't wave back she started to worry that something was wrong. He slowly raised his hand and beckoned her to come out to join him. She just nodded and turned away from the window.
She didn't realize until she was outside that she hadn't brought a jacket. It didn't matter now, she was already soaking wet. When she reached Inuyasha she saw that he too was soaking wet, had probably been here a long while judging by the state of his clothing.
She slowly walked forward, her stomach in knots. She felt lightheaded, and she knew then why he was there. He was going to leave her. Her pace quickened until she was wrapped in his arms. He was freezing cold, and slightly shivering. "Inuyasha?" she whispered.
Inuyasha winced and looked away. He buried his head in her hair for a moment than took a step backwards. "Kagome, we need to talk."
"Don't say that. Inuyasha, please just don't say anything." Kagome pleaded, her tone almost desperate.
"Damn it Kagome don't make this harder than it already is alright? It's just not going to work." Inuyasha snapped, backing up even further.
"I thought you loved me. You said you loved me, what makes you think it won't work out?" Kagome said, tears already starting to fill her eyes. Not that he could tell as they mixed with the rain.
"I do love you, that's the fucking problem. This is not going to work Kagome, it just isn't. You'll be better off without me anyway. It'll be ok." He was leaving. He had turned back towards his car and was starting to open the door. She couldn't tell, but he was crying. Thank god for the rain. He could smell the tears on her and knew that he would be haunted by this sight of her, the sent of her tears, for a very long time.
"I-Inuyasha?" Kagome's voice cracked as she watched him climb into his car. She had thought it might come to this, but not so soon. She thought she had more time. She needed more time!
As the car pulled away she could feel her heart breaking. Gut wrenching sobs started to wrack her body and she couldn't think. She started to run after his car, blindly trying to catch him, but he was already pulling away. Unable to control her sobs any longer she collapsed onto the concrete and started pounded her fists on the ground on front of her. 'HOW DARE HE!' her mind screamed as she continued to vent her pain.
It was hours before someone found her, she hadn't moved, just lay in the middle of the parking lot. Her hands were covered in scraps and bruises, some still slightly oozing blood. The rain was still coming down heavily.
She hated the rain.
She knew she was crying, she just didn't know when it had started. Inuyasha was kneeling in front of her trying to brush away the tears, but they just kept on coming back. His eyes looked like they would over flow soon, but she knew he would never let them actually escape his eyes. He never cried.
"Oh Kagome, don't cry. Please?" he whispered, clutching the arms of her seat.
That brought back a happy memory. When they had just started to admit how they felt to each other…
Kagome lay on her bed at the shrine, sobbing. She had thought that Hojo was a good, safe choice for a boyfriend. He wouldn't hurt her, he was so nice. Asshole…
A loud banging noise downstairs announced the arrival of someone at the shrine, and that very angry voice yelling her name told her it was Inuyasha. "Go away!" she yelled back.
That loud banging of her door hitting her wall as Inuyasha stomped into her room told her she was not going to get her wish. She pulled her pillow out from under her and covered her head with it. She didn't feel like explaining herself to Inuyasha right now.
His angry approach didn't prepare her for the gentle placement of his hand on her shoulder. She thought he would rant and rave about how bad "hobo" was and lots of "I told you so"'s would be thrown around. The gentle way he rubbed her back almost seemed worse. The act of kindness broke her and she threw herself into Inuyasha's arms and let herself vent all her pent up pain and frustration. She started off just sobbing, but soon she was hitting him in the chest, demanding he tell her what was so wrong with her.
He let her hit him, and sob, and curse men, and when she finished he cradled her in his lap and leaned his cheek against the top of her head. "There is nothing wrong with you Kagome, Hobo's just an ass." Inuyasha murmured, than, surprising both of them, dipped down and kissed both of her cheeks, than her forehead. "He doesn't know what he's missing."
Kagome laughed weakly and rubbed the tears out of her eyes. "Well apparently he doesn't care enough to keep his tongue in his own throat and now down Yura's." Kagome muttered.
She felt Inuyasha stiffen and had a passing fear for Hojo's physical well-being. But it was only fleeting. She wrapped her arms around Inuyasha's stomach and leaned against his chest. She was out before he had enough time to come up with a scathing comment about Hojo.
She woke up hours later, still in Inuyasha's lap. He was leaning against the wall and had probably drifted off a while ago. That was when she knew. She wouldn't be able to give up Inuyasha for anyone or anything else. She loved him.
With a sigh she leaned her head on Inuyasha's shoulder and let his shirt soak up her tears. She only had a few moments left before they went back on the air and she would be stuck in here until the next break with him. Sango would probably try and force some more reactions out of her, not that she had ever thought she would let herself give him a second chance. Maybe she just had bad instincts? Whatever it was she needed to think, and soon, before the feel of him and the comfort that gave her sank into her permanently. That would be unfair influence. He had always been her weakness.
"Inuyasha…I have to go. I-I need to think about this. Just, I have to go." Kagome stuttered out, whispering into his shoulder. She took a deep breath and memorized how it felt to be held by him again and than stood up. She slowly made her way out of the room, walking almost as if she had been sitting down for days instead of just half an hour.
Inuyasha just stared after her, his expression completely forlorn. He turned to Sango, his entire body screaming his devastation, "Oh Sango, what have I done?" he asked.
"I don't know Inuyasha, I really don't…" Sango answered, staring after her new friend.
end of chapter
Well that's it for today. It's almost 4 in the morning, I'm exhausted!
Special thanks to all who reviewed!
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