Chapter 2: Guilt and Sorrow
Cosmo stood solemnly in the in the bedroom of his god child. His tired emerald eyes scanned the empty room. Everything was so...
So many things were out of place. By that time, the Playstation should've been out with the TV on high volume. The floor, instead of being clean, should've been littered with pencils, pens, drawings, games, books and so much more. The bed shouldn't be made, it should've been messed up with he and Timmy sitting or laying on it, while Timmy showed him his drawings, and they would've been laughing at something stupid he had said. Timmy's smile would've brightened up the room more than any light bulb could've ever done. The warm feeling of their love would keep them smiling and laughing, not the cold empty feeling that had settled down into the pit of the god fathers stomach and heart.
Cosmo had to struggle in order to stop himself from letting out a sob. After all, it was his fault that Timmy had run away.
"It's over" he said bluntly. Timmy blinked not getting what Cosmo was trying to say "What do you mean?" Cosmo shook his head and repeated "It's over, Timmy"
Timmy's eyes widened as he finally figured out what the green haired fairy god parent was getting at. He whispered "No...you can't mean that."
"Why not?!" Cosmo yelled struggling to get out of his god child's clutches. But Timmy just clung onto him more tightly "Because you love me! Because I love you!" Cosmo was shaken by the desperate tone in his loves voice but he ignored it and said "Love? Ridiculous!"
"You told me countless of times about how much you loved me! How could you-" "IT WAS ALL A LIE!" Cosmo yelled interupting his god child's rage.
Timmy gasped at the sudden outburst and soon he felt tears prickle in his eyes. "No..." he whispered faintly suddenly he took Cosmo's face into his hands and kissed him once more except this time more passionately than before. He tried to show every bit of his love through the kiss but it faltered when he felt Cosmo not even try to kiss back. He let the kiss end but held onto Cosmo looking him directly in the eye demanding "Look me in the eye and tell me you don't love me. Tell me it was all a lie."
Cosmo's expression grew even colder as he looked back at his former lover and said faintly, with his voice trembling "I don't love you. It was all a lie."
Cosmo pushed Timmy away and took several steps before stopping, unable to turn around to look at him. Cosmo whispered "We both knew this was gonna happen sooner or later. Don't make this any harder than it already is." Cosmo turned around and immediately regretted it. Timmy stood there on shaking knees, his sapphire eyes wide with sorrow and pain. Tears streaked down his face, he was biting his lip so hard that Cosmo soon saw a single drop of blood fall down his chin and land on the floor below.
Suddenly an anger rose in Timmy's eyes as he retaliated "It didn't have to be!" He expression turned soft once again as he slowly approached Cosmo, pleading, begging "It doesn't have to be this way!"
"Yes it does!" Cosmo snapped.
"Why?!" asked Timmy. Cosmo felt his entire body go numb. He looked at Timmy wanting more than anything to embrace him, kiss away the tears and tell him that it was all a cruel joke but he couldn't. He felt tears descend but refused to let them fall. He felt his heart break and shatter as he lied "Because we were never meant to be."
He watched more tears stream down Timmy's face. He finally stepped forward wanting to comfort him "I still love you Timmy, but only as a godfather could love a godchild. Nothing more...nothing less."
He walked closer and was about to place a hand on his shoulder when he felt a horrible pain on his cheek. For being pretty dumb it only took him a moment to realize that Timmy had slapped him. He actually slapped him so hard the noise echoed through the room. Cosmo's hand immediately went o his already red, stinging cheek as he looked at Timmy with a surprised expression. He knew Timmy knew how to throw a punch but he didn't know he could slap that hard.
He saw all the pain and sadness in his eyes had been formed into anger and soon heard him say dangerously low "Don't bother! You don't have to worry about me anymore, Cosmo I...I-I HATE YOU!" and with that Timmy stormed out of the room slamming the door behind him leaving Cosmo in his own thoughts.
Cosmo flinched visibly when he remembered the sorrow and pain he had heard when Timmy yelled that he hated him. Just the possibility of Timmy hating him, made his body shake in despair. Right after their break up, Timmy never came back home. His parents continually called his cell phone but he never picked up. He and Wanda had searched for him when his parents failed to find him, but even his own god parents couldn't find him.
After the 2nd day he had disappeared his parents told the police and they reported him as missing. After the third day he and Wanda had met with all of the other god children that he had befriended like, Remy Buxaplenty. That was the strangest visit they had ever taken to the mansion. During their visit Remy had been cold towards both of them, well, colder than he usually was and Wandisimo was just...hateful. He even yelled at Wanda once for being such an idiot.
They had thought that Timmy might've gone to Remy for a place to stay but Remy had told them numerous of times that he hadn't even heard from Timmy. Everyone they asked, didn't know where he was. Even the Fairy Council couldn't predict where he was. Every hour that passed by made the hole in Cosmo's heart grow bigger and bigger.
Cosmo raised a hand in order to rub some sleepy out of his eyes. He hadn't gotten any sleep at all for the past 3 days. While Wanda slept he went out again trying to find his beloved.
'Oh Timmy...if only you knew...'
"This act is in violation of everything that god parents of our time stand for"
Cosmo flinched visibly at the harsh tone in The Fairy Council Leaders voice(ain't that a mouthful?). The Leader stood taller than any of the other members including Jorgen, he had long white hair that flowed all the way down his waist. He looked down upon Cosmo like a hawk hunting his prey. The rest of the members of The Council glared down upon Cosmo also alongside their leader. Jorgen shot an apoligetic look towards Cosmo every time he was able, which wasn't a great surprise since he had been the one to inform The Council about the relationship between Cosmo and Timmy.
"You will end this...'relationship' immediately" demanded The Leader. Cosmo's head shot up at the statement while his eyes widened. His bowed his head soon after not allowing anyone to see the tears that were trying to escape his eyelids. He muttered something that The Leader made him repeat because he couldn't hear him.
"I can't do that..." he whispered. He winced when he heard The Leader slam his fists down onto the table and yell "Do you want to disgrace your entire world?!" A even older looking woman coughed lightly, gaining his attention. The Leaders anger died down slightly when he realized what he was doing. Then his light silver eyes narrowed again. He snapped his fingers and instantly a piece of paper appeared in his hands. His sighed aloud and while rubbing his other hand against his temples he whispered "Why?"
"Because I love him..." replied Cosmo. Everyone's gaze rested sorely on him as he continued "And he loves me...I would be breaking the most important promise I ever made to him..."
"Then you leave me no choice in this matter..." The Leader announced, he watched as Cosmo lifted his gaze towards him ready to endure any punishment that the Council was to throw at him. His gaze softened at the sight but soon said in a stern voice that echoed through the room "By order of the entire Fairy Council, you will end this relationship or your god child will pay the price..."
Cosmos eyes widened as his brain registered what The Leader had just said "Y-You can't make him take the punishment...I'll take it! I'll take it all! Just please keep him out of this..." "I cannot..." The Leader said interupting his rampage. Cosmo felt tears well up in his eyes when he even dared think about Timmy receiving punishment for his crime. Two fresh tears fell down his face as he looked up at the Council, his face pleading and begging for mercy. The Leader sighed, his heart now heavy with his decision "I am sorry Cosmo but either end this or Timmy Turner will be the one to take the punishment...and you know the punishment for this type of crime..."
More tears fell from Cosmos frightened eyes. He bit his lip hard enough to make it numb before whispering into the silence "Then...I-I'll end it..." The members of the Council looked at him with curiosity and he pronounced with a heavy heart "I'll end my relationship with Timmy."
The Members all nodded their heads and they slowly began to file out of the room. Jorgen stole one last glance of Cosmo before disappearing to continue his job. The Leader shot a glance also but soon after disappeared as well. When everyone had left the room Cosmo's knees had finally given in and he fell to the ground sobbing uncontrollably with his his entire body trembling...anyone present could've heard only one thing escaping his mouth that was being repeated over and over again...
"I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry Timmy..."
'Death...' Cosmo thought 'Death has always been the punishment for this type of crime.' He brought his hands up and buried his face within them crying softly. A soft poof behind him told him that his wife had now returned from her search but he didn't even have to look up to know that she had not found him. He quickly wiped away some stray tears before looking behind him. Cosmo would be the first to admit that Wanda didn't look like anything as she had over 3 days ago.
From the sudden disappearance of one of her favorite god children, her mood had turned almost about as somber as Cosmos. Her hair was unkempt and messy, her clothes were slightly wrinkled and underneathe her tired and sad looking dull pink eyes were huge bags that showed the number of hours she had not slept during the 3 day duration. Wanda looked at Cosmo and he wasn't any better than she, the real only difference between them was that now he always had red eyes and trails of tears flowing down his face. "Cosmo..." she whispered softly glancing at his poor state.
Cosmo buried his head in his hands once again while asking her quietly with such a deep desperation it almost made her cry as well "Where is he Wanda?" She walked over to him and slowly brought him into a soft embrace. She felt his body shaking slightly as he repeatedly whispered "Where is he?" Wanda let a single tear fall down her cheek as she held onto the broken fairy in front of her while everytime he asked her she would say the same thing "I...I don't know Cosmo..."
After a few more moments of silent depression they both heard a loud knock on the front door of the Turner house. Both heard Mr. and Mrs. Turner run to the door in hopes of good news. Cosmo looked at Wanda when they both heard the door opening and more than 2 pairs of footsteps. Wanda smiled slightly and they both poofed out of Timmy's bedroom into the hallway next to stairs so they could look down into the living room. Much to Cosmos dismay it wasn't Timmy but two police officers were standing near the front door, but next to them was...Remy Buxaplenty.
They had just seen Remy yesterday but now he looked so...different. Even from far away they could tell that he had been crying for some time now. His eyes were red, his nose slightly swollen, light tear streaks streaming down his face. His eyes were half way closed, he was looking down at the floor so no one could see him this way. He brushed away some lingering tears before one of the officers spoke "You are Mr. and Mrs. Turner right?"
Both of Timmy's parents nodded their heads while Dad asked "Have you found him officer?" Remy had risen his head but when that particular question hung in the air he lowered his gaze once more. One of the officers gave him a pat on the shoulder before sighing and said "Yes...unfortunately we have found your son."
It was almost an uproar. Timmy's Mom and Dad hugged each other and started laughing and cheering. Cosmo and Wanda were doing the same thing. All were laughing and crying for joy until...something hit them. Wanda let go of Cosmo with a slight frown. He looked at her with a confused expression before almost yelling "What's the matter Wanda?" He then began smiling and threw his arms around her while saying "They found him!!!"
"Yeah but..." Wanda said. Cosmo looked at her, she was watching the officer with a slightly pale expression of dread. It seemed that Mrs. Turner was thinking the same thing as unlike Mr. Turner who was still bouncing around. She was looking at him at then finally asked "Did you say...unfortunately?" Mr. Turner stopped bouncing and proclaimed "Hey wait a minute...you did say that. Why is it unfortunate that you found my son who has been missing for the past 3 to 4 days?"
The officers looked at each other then down at Remy who was still looking at the ground. "Maybe this young one could explain what we mean since he is the one who found the body" said the officer. Everyone paled and Mrs. Turner stuttered "B-b-body?"
Cosmo was still holding onto Wanda but more tightly now his eyes wide with fear and dread. Wanda was shaking her head in disbelief as Remy started his story.
Remy sighed before wiping a stray tear and began "Tonight about a couple of hours ago, I was going along for a walk through the park, just to see if I could search for a couple more minutes before I went off to bed. Well...I walked into the park and it had a strange smell around the area so I followed it and I found out that the smell had been...blood...Timmy's blood." Everyone gasped. Mr. and Mrs. Turner looked at each other, tears filling their eyes. Cosmo and Wanda weren't doing much better. "No..." Cosmo whispered while a multitude of tears began to fall. Wanda clung to him her eyes wide and frightened. Soon they all heard Remy continue.
"I walked over to Timmy's favorite bench and...there he was..." Remy turned to Timmy's parents were tears glistening in his eyes and he even let one fall, and said with a heavy heart "I'm sorry Mr. and Mrs. Turner...I found Timmy...dead. A bloody knife laid on the ground beside him and his wrists were cut to the bone. Timmy died...of suicide."
Mrs. Turner let out a pained yell and clung to her husband desperately, he clung to her the same and let his wall of tears come crumbling down. The officers went over to them to pat their backs and try to help calm them down.
Wanda stared disbelieving at the figure that was Remy and she felt two tears escape her eyes as she whispered "It...can't be..." She turned to Cosmo and almost flinched. His eyes were 5 times bigger than their usual size and they were filled with the deepest remorse and depression that she whispered "Cosmo..."
Tears flooded down his face as he then whispered in response "It's all my fault..." Within a second Cosmo had poofed away and left Wanda alone in the hall but she knew there was only one place he would go. He must've heard the officers telling the crying parents that the body was outside. She poofed after him and found herself on the front lawn of the Tuner house. No one else was around but she saw Cosmo standing about 10 feet away looking down at a lump on the ground. When she walked closer she saw that it wasn't a lump...it was Timmy.
She gasped at the sight. Timmy lay on the ground, his skin almost snow white, his face showing content and no regret from what he had done. But if it wasn't for the paleness of his skin he almost looked like he could just jump up any second now and yell "Gotcha!" but the deep cuts on his wrists that you could see clearly in the moonlight, told her he wasn't getting up anytime soon.
She watched as Cosmo fell to his knees and flung himself over the body of his god child and love. Tears stream down his face as he looked at the pale face. He sniffed a little bit before whispering "Get up...Timmy please get up..." but soon the whispering turned into begging "Please Timmy! Please get up! PLEASE!" Wanda raced over to Cosmo and threw her arms around his waist trying to pry him off while yelling "He's dead Cosmo, he can't get up!!!"
It was as if that single statement finally hit him and it hit him hard. He flung Wanda off of him and then crawled back over to Timmy and began whispering "It's all my fault...It's all my fault..." He looked into the pale face and placed soft kisses on the cold forehead and cheeks. He placed only one kiss on the cold lips and when he did he felt his heart break and he had to use all of his self control not to let out his sobs of sorrow. He then placed his head on top of Timmy's chest and let out his sobs while continually crying out "I'm sorry Timmy...I'm so sorry...I love you so much...I'm so sorry..."
Timmy gazed at the stars feeling his heart warm up at the sight. Cosmo lay next to him doing the same. They sat in silence just looking for quite some time before "Cosmo?" Cosmo lifted his head and looked at his 16 year old love with a little smile before answering "Yeah?" Timmy's smile turned into a frown and he asked "Do you think we can always be like this? You know like, we can always be together. Cause I don't wanna lose you and..." but before Timmy could go on Cosmo placed a soft kiss on his lips stopping him.
"I don't wanna lose you either Timmy..." said Cosmo "And I believe if we truly love each other, which we do, then yeah. We'll stay together forever. No matter what the costs." Timmy's frown quickly grew to a big smile and he gave Cosmo a soft peck on the cheek before wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close. He whispered in his ear "Do you promise?"
Cosmo gladly let himself be pulled into the warm embrace and when that question was whispered into his ear he smiled softly and made Timmy look at him straight in the eye. He gave him a kiss on the forehead "I promise..." a kiss on the cheek "that I will always love you" a kiss on the other cheek "and that we will always be together" he placed a passionate on Timmy's lips. Timmy let both of his hands entwine with Cosmo's before looking into his emerald eyes and whispering "I'm glad..."
A single tear escaped and he soon felt Cosmo kiss it away. He whispered "Thank you..." before pulling Cosmo into another kiss more passionate than the last. The two lovers then got lost in their world of kisses and soft embraces...never knowing just how forbidden their love really is.
Hehe...sorry about the long wait for the next chapter but here it is so...PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!!!