Fandom: XXXHOLiC
Characters: Watanuki Kimihiro, Doumeki Shizuka, Ichihara Yuuko, Maru & Moro, Mokona
Theme: 50 – And Other Fairytale Creatures
Warnings/Ratings: Sort of cracky.
In A Nutshell: "Sooooo!" Yuuko continued, "Who are you saving that first kiss for?"
I don't own Holic.

He wasn't really a fairy tale creature, although people like him were rare in society. What made him so close to one was that he was actually from a fairy tale. Or so it seemed.

He'd been telling Yuuko about his predicament as Watanuki eavesdropped listened in. Apparently, a friend of his had just sort of passed out after eating some of an apple and now he needed to find a way to wake her up or something, because the normal shaking and yelling treatment just wasn't working.

"I can help you… for a price." She smiled her sly little smile and he thrust something like a pickaxe towards her. She immediately turned grave. "I see. Watanuki, take this to the storeroom." He scurried up to her, taking the pickaxe to the storeroom as fast as he could so as to not miss any of the conversation.

Too late. Yuuko was already explaining something of a totally unrelated topic, which she concluded with the statement, "Ah, young love!" She giggled and turned to a now-suspicious Watanuki. "Waaaaa-taaaa-nuuu-kiiiii!" She clapped her hands together and what had been only moments before a faint possibility of involvement had solidified into pure trouble. "I need you to accompany this fine gentleman to his world, where you will kiss an unconscious maiden and restore her ability to live!"

"I assume that you would dock the cost of transporting me there and back from my pay," he said dryly.

"Naturally!" She said, like a proud kindergarten teacher. "I'd also dock from your pay-"

"Right, if I weren't to go at all. I know. I think I'll pass on this." He walked away and Yuuko just giggled madly, turning back to her customer to discuss an alternative plan involving a prince. Not soon enough, the customer was leaving. Unfortunately, that left him with Yuuko, who had entered the kitchen with the sole purpose of harassing him as he cooked her dinner.

"Sooooo! Why'd-"

"Snow White, right?" He cut her off, hoping to delay her probing and agitating line of questioning.

"How rude!" He thought she was referring to interrupting until she continued, "She has a name, you know!" That same sly grin snuck back and spread itself sinisterly over her features.

"A name that it would cost me to learn. Yeah, I'm not interested." He poked at the rice a little with his spoon; something seemed wrong about it.

"Sooooo!" Yuuko continued, "Who are you saving that first kiss for?"

"I haven't got anyone in mind yet, I just don't want it to be some random girl so many worlds away that I'll only ever see once, anyway." He shrugged, an attempt at nonchalance that Yuuko couldn't help but think failed completely.

Acting on a hunch she yelled out, "IT'S FOR DOUMEKI-KUN, RIGHT?"

Watanuki paled visibly, turning to her and yelling back, "YOU KNOW DAMN WELL IT'S NOT!"

Maru and Moro waltzed into the room, chanting, "IT'S FOR DOUMEKI-KUN, IT'S FOR DOUMEKI-KUN, IT'S ALL FOR DOUMEKI-KUN!"

Mokona jumped out of the rice cooker, covered entirely in the sticky food and joining in the Happy-Make-Fun-of-Watanuki-Time activities, adding insult to it all by getting rice everywhere he bounced. This, Watanuki thought miserably, is certainly the most direct definition of pandemonium.

Before he could even stop being overwhelmed long enough to start yelling, Doumeki walked in.

"Doumeki-kun! I'm so glad you came! When I called earlier I didn't think you would! But now you're here! Yay!" He acknowledged her presence with a look that was so lacking in enthusiasm it could deflate balloons.

"What's for me, now?" He asked, watching all of the insanity and looking, Watanuki couldn't help noting, much too calm for all of this. As Yuuko started telling him all sorts of crazy things, Watanuki contemplated taking the food out of the oven and putting himself in it. At least it would be cozy.

Good night, good night! parting is such
sweet sorrow,
That I shall say good night 'till it be morrow.